dafh33-337.pdf

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE

WASHINGTON, DC

DAFH33-337_DAFGM2023-01

14 DECEMBER 2023

(Note: Reissue of 16 December 2022

DAFH33-337_DAFGM2022-01)

MEMORANDUM FOR DISTRIBUTION C

MAJCOMs/FLDCOMs/FOAs/DRUs

FROM: SAF/CN

1800 Air Force Pentagon

Washington DC 20330-1800

SUBJECT: Department of the Air Force Guidance Memorandum to AFH33-337, The Tongue and

Quill

By Order

of the Secretary of the Air Force, this Department of the Air Force Guidance

Memorandum reissues Department of the Air Force Handbook (DAFH) 33-337, The Tongue and

Quill Guidance Memorandum (DAFH33-337_DAFGM 2022-01). Compliance with this

Memorandum is mandatory. To the extent its directions are inconsistent with other Air Force

publications, the information herein prevails, in accordance with DAFI90-160, Publications and

Forms Management.

DAFH33-337 is hereby updated to reflect changes in Part V and Part VI for Chapters 12, 14,

15, 16 and 20 (Attachment). This guidance provides approval for the use of pronouns in electronic

signature blocks and expands on written communication by providing official templates posted on e-

publishing website available for download (www.e-publishing.af.mil). Direct Readers to ITEMS OF

INTEREST where users can find the Template User Guide, The Personal Letter, Official

Memorandum, Background Paper, Official Bio, Position Paper, Bullet Background, Point Paper and

Talking Paper templates.

This

Memorandum becomes void after one year has elapsed from the date of this

Memorandum, or upon incorporation by interim change to, or rewrite of DAFH33-337, whichever is

earlier.

Veni

ce M. Goodwine, SES, DAF

Chief Information Officer

Office of the Chief Information Officer

Attac

hment:

Interim Guidance to DAFH33-337, The Tongue and Quill

ATTACHMENT

Interim Guidance to DAFH33-337, The Tongue and Quill

DAFH33-337_DAFGM2023- 01

(DELETE) OPR: SAF/CIO A6SS

(REPLACE) OPR: SAF/CNZA

(DELETE) Certified by: SAF/CIO A6SS (Col Heather L. McGee)

(REPLACE) Certified by: SAF/CNZ, J. Aaron Bishop, SES

(DELETE) Signature Block: Lauren B. Knausenberger, SES

(REPLACE) Signature Block: Venice M. Goodwine, SES

PURPOSE

(REPLACE) Military members and civilian employees of the Department of the Air Force (DAF)

must communicate clearly and effectively to carry out our missions. Although we live in an era of

rapid personal and mass communication that was barely imagined just a few years ago, our Air Force

still requires face-to-face briefings, background papers, and staff packages to keep the mission

moving forward. This handbook, together with AFMAN33-326, Preparing Official Communications,

and the templates posted on e-publishing website provide the information to ensure clear

communications-written or spoken. Send recommended changes or comments using DAF Form 847,

Recommendation for Change of Publication, to the Air Force Compliance Division (SAF/CNZA) at

[email protected]il. Ensure all records generated as a result of processes

prescribed in this publication adhere to Air Force Instruction 33-322, Records Management and

Information Governance Program, and are disposed in accordance with the Air Force Records

Disposition Schedule, which is located in the Air Force Records Information Management System.

The use of the name or mark of any specific manufacturer, commercial product, commodity, or

service in this publication does not imply endorsement by the Air Force.

CHAPTER 12: Electronic Communications and Social Media

Special Considerations and E-mail Protocol

Special Considerations

(CHANGE) Use appropriate closings. Official e-mail should close with “//SIGNED//” above the

signature block to signify official Air Force information. Restrict the signature block to name, rank,

service affiliation, duty title, organization name, phone numbers (DSN and/or commercial as

appropriate) and social media contact information. Do not add slogans, quotes or other

personalization to an official e-mail/social media signature block. The use of pronouns (he/him,

she/her, or they/them) in an email signature block is authorized but not required.

(ADD) CHAPTER 14: The Official Memorandum. The following template is now available for

downloading from www.e-publishing.af.mil, ITEMS OF INTEREST.

(ADD) CHAPTER 15: The Personal Letter. The following template is now available for

downloading from www.e-publishing.af.mil, ITEMS OF INTEREST.

(ADD) CHAPTER 16: Department of the Air Force “Papers”. The following template is now

available for downloading from www.e-publishing.af.mil. (Point Paper, Talking Paper, Bullet

Background Paper (BBP) Background Paper, and Position Paper and superseded the examples listed

in AFH33-337 published 27 May 2015), ITEMS OF INTEREST.

(ADD) CHAPTER 20: The Official Biography. The following template is now available for

downloading from www.e-publishing.af.mil, ITEMS OF INTEREST.

The

Tongue and Quill

AFH 33-337

27 MAY 2015

Incorporating Change 1, 19 November 2015

Air Force Core Values

Integrity First, Service Before Self, and Excellence in All We Do.

Acknowledgement

The Tongue and Quill has been a valued Air Force resource for decades and many Airmen from

our Total Force of uniformed and civilian members have contributed their talents to various

editions over the years. This revision is built upon the foundation of governing directives and

user’s inputs from the unit level all the way up to Headquarters Air Force. A small team of Total

Force Airmen from the Air University, the United States Air Force Academy, Headquarters Air

Education and Training Command (AETC), the Air Force Reserve Command (AFRC), Air

National Guard (ANG), and Headquarters Air Force compiled inputs from the field and rebuilt

The Tongue and Quill to meet the needs of today’s Airmen. The team put many hours into this

effort over a span of almost two years to improve the content, relevance, and organization of

material throughout this handbook. As the final files go to press it is the desire of The Tongue

and Quill team to say thank you to every Airman who assisted in making this edition better; you

have our sincere appreciation!

–The Tongue and Quill Team

BY ORDER OF THE AIR FORCE HANDBOOK 33-337

SECRETARY OF THE AIR FORCE 27 MAY 2015

Incorporating Change 1, 19 November 2015

Communications and Information

THE TONGUE AND QUILL

ACCESSIBILITY: Publications and forms are available for downloading or ordering on the

e-Publishing website at http://www.e-publishing.af.mil.

RELEASABILITY: There are no releasability restrictions on this publication.

OPR: SAF/CIO A6SS Certified by: SAF/CIO A6SS

(Col Heather L. McGee)

Supersedes: AFH33-337, 1 August 2004 Pages: 370

The men and women of the United States Air Force must communicate clearly and effectively to

carry out our missions. Although we live in an era of rapid personal and mass communication

that was barely imagined just a few years ago, our Air Force still requires face-to-face briefings,

background papers, and staff packages to keep the mission moving forward. This handbook,

together with Air Force Manual (AFMAN) 33-326, Preparing Official Communications,

provides the information to ensure clear communications—written or spoken.

Send recommended changes or comments using AF Form 847, Recommendation for Change of

Publication, to the Air Force Cyberspace Strategy & Policy Division (SAF/CIO A6SS) at

USAF.pentagon.saf-cio-a6.mbx.a6ss-workflow@mail.mil. Ensure that all records created as a

result of processes prescribed in this publication are maintained IAW AFMAN 33-363,

Management of Records, and disposed of IAW the Air Force Records Disposition Schedule

(RDS) in the Air Force Records Information Management System (AFRIMS). The use of the

name or mark of any specific manufacturer, commercial product, commodity, or service in this

publication does not imply endorsement by the Air Force.

SUMMARY OF CHANGES

This edition has been substantially revised to 1) standardize the format and layout for readability;

2) improve the organization of chapters and content within each chapter; 3) provide additional

material on preparing to write and speak, writing with focus, communicating to persuade,

research, meetings, briefings and listening; 4) clarify guidance for Air Force written products

with formatted examples for each product; and 5) update guidance for electronic

communications. A margin bar (|) indicates newly revised material

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Table of Contents

PART I: COMMUNICATION BASICS ................................................................................... 1

Plain Language Requirement: It’s the Law ............................................................................................. 2

Plain Language in the Air Force: Be Clear, Concise and Specific .......................................................... 2

CHAPTER 1: A Basic Philosophy of Communication ............................................................. 3

What Do We Mean by Communication? ................................................................................................. 4

Communication, Teamwork and Leadership ............................................................................................ 5

Principles of Effective Communication ................................................................................................... 5

CHAPTER 2: Seven Steps to Effective Communication (Overview) ..................................... 8

Preparing to Write and Speak (Steps 1-4) ................................................................................................ 9

Drafting, Editing, and Feedback (Steps 5-7) .......................................................................................... 11

Seven Steps to Effective Communication: Quick Reference List ......................................................... 13

PART II: PREPARING TO WRITE AND SPEAK ............................................................... 14

CHAPTER 3: Step 1 (Analyze Purpose and Audience) ......................................................... 15

Key Questions ........................................................................................................................................ 16

What Is My Purpose? ............................................................................................................................. 16

Drafting a Purpose Statement ................................................................................................................. 17

Analyzing Purpose: Other Issues ........................................................................................................... 18

Audience Analysis: The Human Factor ................................................................................................. 18

Tips for Success ...................................................................................................................................... 20

CHAPTER 4: Step 2 (Research Your Topic) .......................................................................... 23

Start Smart .............................................................................................................................................. 24

Getting Data............................................................................................................................................ 25

Search Engines and Databases ............................................................................................................... 26

Evaluate Your Sources ........................................................................................................................... 30

Useful Online Resources ........................................................................................................................ 31

CHAPTER 5: Step 3 (Support Your Ideas) ............................................................................ 41

The Logic of Arguments: Fundamentals ............................................................................................... 42

Evidence: Proving Your Point ............................................................................................................... 44

Characteristics of Good Supporting Evidence ........................................................................................ 45

Logical Errors: Flawed Arguments ....................................................................................................... 46

Arguments, Truth and Persuasion .......................................................................................................... 52

CHAPTER 6: Step 4 (Organize and Outline) ......................................................................... 53

Organizing: Finalizing Your Purpose Statement and Bottom Line ....................................................... 54

The Outline: Why Do I Need One? ....................................................................................................... 55

Outlining the Body: Pick a Pattern ........................................................................................................ 59

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PART III: WRITING WITH FOCUS ..................................................................................... 63

CHAPTER 7: Step 5 (Draft) ..................................................................................................... 65

Drafting: Basic Philosophy .................................................................................................................... 66

Drafting Effective Paragraphs ................................................................................................................ 69

Drafting Effective Sentences .................................................................................................................. 73

Overcoming Writer’s Block ................................................................................................................... 90

CHAPTER 8: Step 6 (Edit) ....................................................................................................... 91

Editing vs. Feedback .............................................................................................................................. 92

Editing Fundamentals ............................................................................................................................. 92

Editing Efficiently: A Three-Step Approach ......................................................................................... 93

Drafting Basics: Did You Apply Them? ............................................................................................... 96

Common Grammar Traps ....................................................................................................................... 97

Common Writing Errors ....................................................................................................................... 101

CHAPTER 9: Step 7 (Fight for Feedback and Get Approval) ........................................... 103

Fighting For Feedback .......................................................................................................................... 104

Getting Approval: Staff Coordination ................................................................................................. 106

PART IV: SPEAKING AND LISTENING ........................................................................... 110

CHAPTER 10: Air Force Speaking ....................................................................................... 111

Verbal Communication ........................................................................................................................ 112

Non-Verbal Communication ................................................................................................................ 113

Overcoming Anxiety: Some Simple Steps .......................................................................................... 114

Common Nonverbal Quirks ................................................................................................................. 115

Delivery Formats: Impromptu, Prepared and Manuscript ................................................................... 115

Preparing Your Slides ........................................................................................................................... 118

CHAPTER 11: Effective Listening Strategies ....................................................................... 123

Understanding Hearing and Listening .................................................................................................. 123

Informative, Critical and Empathic Listening ...................................................................................... 124

Better Listening .................................................................................................................................... 129

Overcoming Barriers to Listening ........................................................................................................ 130

PART V: WORKPLACE CHALLENGES ........................................................................... 132

CHAPTER 12: Electronic Communications and Social Media .......................................... 133

Electronic Mail (E-Mail) ...................................................................................................................... 134

Social Media ......................................................................................................................................... 142

Instant Messaging (IM) and Texting .................................................................................................... 146

Telephones, Voice Mail and Fax .......................................................................................................... 147

Electronic Communications Glossary .................................................................................................. 150

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CHAPTER 13: Meetings ......................................................................................................... 153

Planning an Effective Meeting ............................................................................................................. 154

Running Your Meeting ......................................................................................................................... 157

Group Dynamics and Fun ..................................................................................................................... 159

PART VI: DOCUMENT STANDARDS ................................................................................ 161

CHAPTER 14: The Official Memorandum .......................................................................... 163

The Heading Section ............................................................................................................................ 164

The Text of the Official Memorandum ................................................................................................ 169

The Closing Section ............................................................................................................................. 169

Additional Information ......................................................................................................................... 173

Attachments .......................................................................................................................................... 174

The Official Memorandum: Examples ................................................................................................ 177

Spelling Checkers: Before You Sign ................................................................................................... 190

CHAPTER 15 The Personal Letter ........................................................................................ 191

The Heading Section ............................................................................................................................ 192

The Text of the Personal Letter ............................................................................................................ 193

The Closing Section ............................................................................................................................. 193

Forms of Address, Salutation and Complimentary Close .................................................................... 194

Military Ranks and Abbreviations ........................................................................................................ 211

The Personal Letter: Examples ............................................................................................................ 213

CHAPTER 16: Air Force “Papers” ....................................................................................... 219

Form and Function ............................................................................................................................... 219

Point Paper............................................................................................................................................ 222

Talking Paper........................................................................................................................................ 223

Bullet Background Paper ...................................................................................................................... 224

Background Paper ................................................................................................................................ 226

Position Paper ....................................................................................................................................... 228

CHAPTER 17: The Staff Study .............................................................................................. 229

Purpose ................................................................................................................................................. 229

Process: Critical Thinking and Problem Solving................................................................................. 230

Writing the Report ................................................................................................................................ 232

Complete the Study .............................................................................................................................. 235

CHAPTER 18: The Staff Package.......................................................................................... 237

SSS Fundamentals ................................................................................................................................ 238

Completing the SSS Form .................................................................................................................... 238

Assembling the Package ....................................................................................................................... 241

Coordinating the Package ..................................................................................................................... 242

Sample SSS and eSSS .......................................................................................................................... 243

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CHAPTER 19: Writing Better Bullet Statements ................................................................ 247

Getting Started ...................................................................................................................................... 248

Drafting Accomplishment-Impact Bullet Statements ........................................................................... 248

Polishing Accomplishment-Impact Bullet Statements ......................................................................... 253

Bullet Statement Mechanics ................................................................................................................. 256

CHAPTER 20: The Official Biography ................................................................................. 257

The Official Biography: Fundamentals ............................................................................................... 257

Getting Started ...................................................................................................................................... 258

Associated Press (AP) Style Guidance for Official Biographies .......................................................... 258

Official Biography Elements ................................................................................................................ 259

CHAPTER 21: The Résumé ................................................................................................... 265

Function and Organization ................................................................................................................... 266

Seven Steps to an Effective Résumé .................................................................................................... 267

Things to Include .................................................................................................................................. 268

Things to Omit ...................................................................................................................................... 269

The Résumé Cover Letter ..................................................................................................................... 269

Examples .............................................................................................................................................. 269

CHAPTER 22: Envelopes and Mail ....................................................................................... 275

Envelope Fundamentals ........................................................................................................................ 276

Envelope Anatomy ............................................................................................................................... 276

Address Format Standards .................................................................................................................... 277

USPS Mail Terminology ...................................................................................................................... 281

CHAPTER 23: Air Force Publications/Forms ...................................................................... 283

Dual Responsibilities in Developing Publications/Forms .................................................................... 283

Publications/Forms Process Overview ................................................................................................. 284

Plain Language Challenge .................................................................................................................... 284

PART VII: WRITING MECHANICS ................................................................................... 285

CHAPTER 24: Writing Terminology .................................................................................... 287

Common Grammatical and Writing Terms .......................................................................................... 288

Irregular Verbs ...................................................................................................................................... 294

CHAPTER 25: Punctuation .................................................................................................... 295

Punctuation: Why Do We Need It? ..................................................................................................... 295

Open and Closed Punctuation .............................................................................................................. 296

Punctuating Terms in a Series .............................................................................................................. 296

Punctuation Usage Guide ..................................................................................................................... 297

Summary............................................................................................................................................... 330

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CHAPTER 26: Abbreviations ................................................................................................ 331

Definition and Implications .................................................................................................................. 331

Types of Abbreviations ........................................................................................................................ 332

General Guidelines ............................................................................................................................... 334

Common Abbreviations ........................................................................................................................ 335

Researcher’s Guide to Abbreviations ................................................................................................... 340

CHAPTER 27: Capitalization ................................................................................................ 341

General Capitalization Guidelines ........................................................................................................ 341

Specific Capitalization Guidelines ....................................................................................................... 342

CHAPTER 28: Numbers ......................................................................................................... 355

Three General Rules ............................................................................................................................. 355

Specific Guidance ................................................................................................................................. 356

Summing Things Up ............................................................................................................................. 362

PART I:

Communication Basics

- 1 -

PART I:

COMMUNICATION BASICS

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Plain Language Requirement: It’s the Law

Agencies of the US Government have a long history of trying to improve their ability to

communicate with the public they serve. Public Law 111-274, Plain Writing Act of 2010, is the

most recent mandate to target unclear language in government documents. The Plain Writing

Act is implemented in the Department of Defense (DoD) by DoD Instruction 5025.13, DoD

Plain Language Program, which “promotes the use of clear, concise, and well organized

language in documents to effectively communicate with intended audiences.” Everything you

write in your official Air Force capacity needs to comply with the Plain Writing Act as

directed by DoDI 5025.13. It should also comply with the specifics of Air Force Instruction

(AFI) 33-360, Publications and Forms Management, for any Air Force publications. So, when

you are preparing to write or speak, and before putting pen to paper for a report or publication,

remember to keep it plain.

Plain Language in the Air Force: Be Clear, Concise and Specific

When drafting new publications or revising existing ones, authors will follow the

Federal Plain Language Guidelines available at http://www.plainlanguage.gov,

as appropriate. Specialized language may be required depending on the intended

audience, but language and content organization should be as clear as possible.

–AFI 33-360, para. 6.5.10

The instruction also provides three plain language concepts (be clear, be concise, and be specific)

with tips on how to write to achieve each concept. Keep these concepts in mind as you work

prepare to write any document. These concepts will help with your briefings, too!

Plain Language Concepts (Adapted from AFI 33-360, Table 6.3)

Be Clear

• Use plain language whenever possible; avoid jargon

• Avoid overuse of acronyms; when used, make certain acronyms are

established [written out] upon first use

• Use the active voice

• Format documents so that they are easy to read and understand

• Use tables and figures if that’s the best way to show information

Be Concise

• Remove unnecessary words

• Focus sentences on a single thought or action; strive to write sentences

with no more than 20 words

• Focus paragraphs on a single main point; strive to write paragraphs

with no more than seven sentences

Be Specific

• Include only information that the reader must know

• Use words with precise meaning

• Include details that are directly relevant to the main point

CHAPTER 1:

A Basic Philosophy of Communication

- 3 -

CHAPTER 1:

A Basic Philosophy of

Communication

This chapter covers:

• What do We Mean by Communication?

• Communication, Teamwork and Leadership

• Principles of Effective Communication

This is an exciting time to be in the United States Air Force! Our mission and our operations

tempo reflect the larger world around us—a world of rapidly accelerating technology and nearly

unlimited access to information. Airmen successfully accomplish more missions with fewer

people than ever before and there is a constant battle to cover the bases with limited resources.

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What Do We Mean by Communication?

Communication is defined as the process of sharing ideas, information and messages with others.

In the Air Force, most communication involves speaking and writing, but this definition also

includes nonverbal communication, such as body language, graphics, electronic messages, etc.

Any communication can be broken into three parts: the sender, the message and the audience.

For communication to be successful, the audience must not only get the message, but must

interpret the message in the way the sender intended.

com·mu·ni·ca·tion n

1. an act or instance of transmitting information

2. a verbal or written message

3. a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a

common system of symbols, signs or behavior

Since communication requires effort, it should always have a purpose. If the purpose isn’t clear

to the audience, you have a problem! Most Air Force communication is intended to direct,

inform (or educate), persuade or inspire. Often the sender has some combination of these

motives in mind.

Chapter 3 describes the process of determining your purpose and audience in detail, but here are

a few examples of Air Force communication targeted toward a specific objective:

1. The headquarters staff (the sender); writes a new policy on trip report procedures (the

message); and sends a copy to all subordinate units (the audience).

Purpose of this communication: to direct.

2. An aircraft technician (the sender); reports the results of an aircraft engine inspection (the

message); to his supervisor (the audience).

Purpose of this communication: to inform.

3. A branch chief (the sender); requests additional funding for new office furniture (the

message); in a meeting with the division chief (the audience).

Purpose of this communication: to persuade.

Most communication outside the Air Force falls in these categories as well. If you look

carefully, you can see the efforts to inform, direct, persuade or inspire in this common

conversation. Can you spot the purpose of each of the following sentences?

“You didn’t wash the car like you promised.”

“But Dad! Everyone else is going to the beach. Why can’t I go?”

“Son, I know you’re a fine young man and fine young men keep their promises.”

“Aw, Dad…”

“Wash the car NOW!”

CHAPTER 1:

A Basic Philosophy of Communication

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Communication, Teamwork and Leadership

Communication skills are vitally important in any environment where teamwork is important.

Simply put, communication enables us to come together to accomplish things better as a group

than we can accomplish as individuals. Communication skills are particularly important for

leaders. The ability to communicate a vision and direction, to motivate and inspire others and to

persuade our superiors are all essential in bringing people together to achieve a common goal.

The military environment is unique and much of its uniqueness requires extraordinary

communication skills. We operate highly technical equipment in a lethal environment and we

are held to very high standards by the country we serve. Miscommunication can cause expensive

mistakes, embarrass our organization and in some cases cause accidents or even death. This

handbook is designed to give you tools and ideas that will help you learn to communicate better

… and to teach others as well.

The call to arms to improve our communication skills is clear. Both the Air Force and the large

culture we live in are drowning in a sea of information. Around-the-clock media coverage,

universal electronic mail (e-mail) and the overwhelming amount of data on the Internet make it

difficult for us to sift out the valuable information we need to accomplish our mission. Now,

more than ever, it’s important to communicate with clarity and focus.

The only way to become a better writer and speaker is to work at it—there are no short cuts. The

good news is that service in the Air Force will provide plenty of opportunities for you to

improve. Your communication skills will become stronger with practice, regardless of your

initial ability, and this book is designed to help you on your journey.

Principles of Effective Communication

Once you accept that communication is important, it’s important to understand what makes

communication succeed and what makes it fail. Most mistakes are caused by forgetting one of

five principles of good communication. This section addresses these core principles for strong

writing and speaking, which we’ve organized to spell out the acronym FOCUS.

FOCUS Principles

• Focused: Address the issue, the whole issue, and nothing but the issue.

• Organized: Systematically present your information and ideas.

• Clear: Communicate with clarity and make each word count.

• Understanding: Understand your audience and its expectations.

• Supported: Use logic and support to make your point.

FOCUSED: Address the Issue, the Whole Issue and Nothing but the Issue

The first hallmark of good communication is that it is focused. In a staff or academic

environment, writing and speaking often attempts to answer a question provided by either a boss

or an instructor. In such situations, answer the question, the whole question and nothing but

the question. Failure to focus comes in three forms:

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1. Answering the wrong question. This happens when we don’t understand the

assignment or what the audience really wants. Have you ever written what you thought

was an excellent paper, only to be told you answered the wrong question or you missed

the point? Have you ever asked someone a question and received a long answer that had

nothing to do with what you asked?

2. Answering only part of the question. If a problem or question has multiple parts,

sometimes we work out the easiest or most interesting part of the solution and forget the

unpleasant remainder.

3. Adding irrelevant information. Here the communicator answers the question, but

mixes in information that is interesting but unnecessary. Though the answer is complete,

it’s hard to understand—it’s like finding that needle in the haystack.

fo·cus n

1. a state or condition permitting clear perception or understanding: direction;

2. a center of activity, attraction, or attention; a point of concentration;

directed attention: emphasis.

Failure to focus can really hurt staff communication. Time and time again, our efforts crash and

burn because we don’t carefully read the words or really listen to the speaker for the real

message … for the specific question! Most executive officers will tell you that failing to answer

the question is one of the primary reasons staff packages are returned. Chapter 3 provides

suggestions on how to be clear in your purpose and avoid these problems.

ORGANIZED: Systematically Present Your Information and Ideas

Good organization means your material is presented in a logical, systematic manner. This helps

your audience understand you without reading your words over and over, trying to sort out what

you’re really trying to say.

When writing or speaking is not well organized, audiences become easily confused or impatient

and may stop reading or listening. Even if you’re providing useful, relevant information, your

audience may underestimate its value and your own credibility.

Chapter 6 is full of suggestions on how to organize well. Problems with organization are

relatively easy to fix and the payoffs are enormous. In our limited time and resource

environments, a little effort on your part will save your audience a lot of time and pain.

CLEAR: Communicate With Clarity and Make Each Word Count

This principle covers two interrelated ideas. First, to communicate clearly, we need to

understand the rules of language—how to spell and pronounce words and how to assemble and

punctuate sentences. Second, we should get to the point, not hide our ideas in a jungle of words.

People are quick to judge your credibility through your mastery of language to convey ideas.

Acceptable English is part of the job, so commit to improving any problems you may have.

Developing strong language skills is a lot like developing strong muscles—steady commitment

produces steady improvement. Always remember that progress, not perfection, is the goal.

CHAPTER 1:

A Basic Philosophy of Communication

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Grammar scares most of us, but the good news is that many common mistakes can be corrected

by understanding a few rules. Start by scanning our section on editing sentences, phrases and

words. If you want to dig deeper, then check out some of the books and Internet sites that

address grammar and writing—contact your local librarian or our References section for some

suggestions.

Using language correctly is only half of the battle, though—many Air Force writers and speakers

cripple themselves with bureaucratic jargon, big words and lots of passive voice. These bad

habits make it hard to understand the message.

UNDERSTANDING: Understand Your Audience and Its Expectations

If you want to share an idea with others, it helps to understand their current knowledge, views

and level of interest in the topic. If you’ve been asked to write a report, it helps to understand the

expected format and length of the response, the due date, the level of formality and any staffing

requirements. It’s easy to see how mistakes in understanding your audience can lead to

communication problems, and I’m sure you’ve watched others make this mistake. Check out

Chapter 3 for some helpful hints on audience analysis.

SUPPORTED: Use Logic and Support to Make Your Point

Most writers and speakers try to inform or persuade their audience. Part of the communicator’s

challenge is to assemble and organize information to help build his or her case. Support and

logic are the tools used to build credibility and trust with our audience.

sup·port n information that substantiates a position;

v to furnish evidence for a position.

Nothing cripples a clearly written, properly punctuated paper quicker than a fractured fact or a

distorted argument. Avoiding this pitfall is most difficult, even for good writers and speakers.

Logic is tough to teach and learn because it challenges the highest levels of human intellect—the

ability to think in the abstract. We slip into bad habits at an early age and it takes effort to break

them. Chapter 4 provides practical advice on how to use support and logic to enhance your

effectiveness as a speaker and how to avoid common mistakes.

SUMMARY: In this chapter, we defined communication as the process of sharing ideas,

information and messages with others and described how effective communication enables

military personnel to work together. To help writers and speakers stay on target, we introduced

five FOCUS principles of effective communication. In the next chapter, we’ll describe a

systematic approach to help you attain these principles and meet your communication goals.

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CHAPTER 2:

Seven Steps to Effective

Communication (Overview)

This chapter covers:

• Preparing to Write and Speak (Steps 1–4)

• Drafting, Editing, and Feedback (Steps 5–7)

• Seven Steps to Effective Communication: Quick Reference List

Chapter 1 introduced the FOCUS principles of effective communication (Focused, Organized,

Clear, Understanding and Supported). In this chapter, we’ll introduce a seven-step approach to

effective communication based on the FOCUS principles. Here you’ll get the big picture

introduction, but later chapters will describe each of the seven steps in greater detail.

You can tailor the steps to your own style and approach, but completing each of them will

increase your chances of speaking and writing success. These steps are not always used in

sequence and for long and complicated assignments you may find yourself moving back and

forth between steps. That’s OK—it’s better to deviate from a plan than to have no plan at all.

CHAPTER 2:

Seven Steps To Effective Communication (Overview)

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Preparing to Write and Speak (Steps 1-4)

Like many things, good communication requires preparation and the first four steps lay the

groundwork for the drafting process. Though much of this seems like common sense, you’d be

surprised at how many people skip the preparation and launch into writing sentences and

paragraphs (or speaking “off the cuff”). DON’T DO IT! Good speaking or writing is like

building a house—you need a good plan and a firm foundation.

Seven Steps For Effective Communication

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience

2. Research Your Topic

3. Support Your Ideas

4. Organize and Outline

5. Draft

6. Edit

7. Fight for Feedback and Get Approval

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience

To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way

we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our

communication with others.

–Anthony Robbins

Too many writers launch into their project without a clear understanding of their purpose or

audience. This is a shame—a few minutes spent on this step can save hours of frustration later

and help determine whether you end up looking like an eagle or a turkey. You’re much more

likely to hit the target if you know what and who you’re aiming at.

Carefully analyzing your purpose helps with FOCUS Principle #1: “Focused—answer the

question, the whole question and nothing but the question.” In some cases, if you take a hard

look at the purpose, you might find that a formal paper or briefing might not be needed. You’d

be startled at how many briefings, paper documents and electronic messages are processed in a

typical day in a major command (MAJCOM) or wing. Formal communication takes effort and

costs money—make sure you don’t unnecessarily add to everybody’s workload.

If you take the time to “understand your audience” (FOCUS Principle #4) and think about their

current knowledge, interest and motives, you’ll be better able to tailor your message so that

you’ll accomplish your purpose, regardless of what it is. Instructing a hostile audience about

changes in medical benefits will be different than inspiring a friendly audience at a Veteran’s

Day celebration and writing for the general’s signature will be different than writing for the base

webpage. Chapter 3 has lots of helpful suggestions about analyzing purpose and audience.

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2. Research Your Topic

Truth is generally the best vindication against slander.

–Abraham Lincoln

Remember that FOCUS Principle #5 states good communication should be supported with

information relevant to your point. Step Two—“Research your topic”—gives you the raw

material to build your case.

For many of us, “research” sounds intimidating—it brings back memories of painful school

projects and hostile librarians who wouldn’t let us sneak coffee into the building. Don’t let the

idea of research scare you. In the context of the seven-step approach, research is the process of

digging up information that supports your communication goals. Think of it as “doing your

homework” to get smart on your communication topic. Chapter 4 is full of helpful advice on

how to approach the challenge. For those of you interested in academic research, Appendix 2

has additional information on the topic.

3. Support Your Ideas

If you wish to converse with me, define your terms.

–Voltaire

Often our communication goal involves persuasion. In such cases, throwing information at our

audiences isn’t enough—we have to assemble and arrange our facts to support our position.

Different kinds of information gathered during the research process can be used to form a logical

argument. A logical argument is not a disagreement or a fight—it’s how we assemble

information to make decisions and solve problems.

At the same time we are trying to persuade others, others are trying to persuade us and not all

their arguments are airtight. A logical fallacy is a weakness or failure in the logic of an

argument. Chapter 5 describes logical arguments and several common logical fallacies—

allowing you to recognize mistakes in other’s arguments and avoid them in your own.

Building logical arguments are part of everyday life. We build arguments when we decide which

new car to buy, who to nominate for a quarterly award or how we should spend our training

budget. You’ll find that many of the ideas described in Chapter 5 are part of the way you think,

even if you didn’t know the formal terminology.

4. Organize and Outline

Organizing is our core principle. It is our north star.

–Anna Burger

You know your purpose and audience, you’ve done your homework—it’s time to deliver your

message, right? Not so fast! Before starting to write sentences and paragraphs (or deliver your

speech), you’ll save time and frustration by organizing your thoughts and developing an outline

of how you are going to present your information.

CHAPTER 2:

Seven Steps To Effective Communication (Overview)

- 11 -

Successful communicators organize their material logically and in a sequence that leads their

audience from one point to the next. Audiences often “tune out” a speaker or writer who rambles

on without a logical pattern. Poorly organized essays are a common complaint in both civilian

and military schools. Save yourself and your audience a lot of pain—read chapter 6 to learn

different patterns and techniques to organize and outline your material.

FOCUS Principle #2 states that good communication should be organized so that the audience

can efficiently understand your point. You’ve taken the first steps towards accomplishing this

principle when you take the time to organize and outline your work before starting to write …

but how you actually draft and edit paragraphs will take you the rest of the way.

Drafting, Editing, and Feedback (Steps 5-7)

The first four steps are identical for both writing and speaking assignments, but the drafting and

editing processes are somewhat different for the two forms of communication. In this section

we’ll describe the steps from a writing perspective and chapters 9 and 10 will describe how the

steps are adapted for Air Force speaking.

5. Draft

It is a draft—a draft which should be discussed and improved.

–Michael Barnier

When we think about the writing process, we immediately think of drafting sentences and

paragraphs. If you’re uncomfortable with your writing skills, this step usually causes the most

anxiety. The good news is that your work on Steps 1-4 will make the drafting process less

painful and more efficient.

Once you’ve completed the preliminaries and are ready to write, there are several practical ways

to ensure you connect with your readers.

• First, get to the point quickly—use one or more introductory paragraphs to state your

purpose up front. Most Air Force readers don’t have the time or patience to read a staff

paper written like a mystery novel with a surprise ending.

• Second, organize your paragraphs so the readers know where you’re leading them and

use transitions to guide them along.

• Third, make sure your sentences are clear and direct. Cut through the jargon and passive

voice, use the right word for the job and be as concise as possible. Finally, summarize

your message in a concluding paragraph that connects all the dots and completes the

message.

Chapter 7 is full of practical advice on drafting and it takes a top-down approach. It begins with

preliminaries such as writing tone and formats, transitions to paragraph construction, provides

practical tips on writing clear, vigorous sentences, then concludes with advice on overcoming

writer’s block.

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6. Edit

Editing is the same thing as quarreling with writers—same thing exactly.

–Harold Ross

Experienced writers know that editing should be a separate, distinct process from drafting.

When you draft, you create something new. When you edit, you shift from creator to critic. This

change in roles can be tough, and no one wants to admit that the draft may not be as good as he

thought. Remember that criticism and judgment are inevitable in communication. The better

you are at critically evaluating and correcting your own writing, the fewer people will be doing it

for you.

There are two important aspects of the editing process—WHAT you are editing for and HOW to

edit efficiently. What to edit for is simple—remember those FOCUS principles from chapter 1?

How to edit is a little more complicated, but we recommend starting with the big picture and

working down to details like spelling and punctuation. Ironically, many people do just the

opposite; they focus on details first. Some even think that editing is all about the details.

Nothing could be farther from the truth. Though details are part of editing, they’re only part of

the puzzle. Chapter 8 provides information on editing fundamentals and procedures.

7. Fight for Feedback and Get Approval

There is no failure. Only feedback.

–Robert G. Allen

When you’ve completed the editing process and done what you can to improve your

communication, it’s time to move outside yourself to get feedback. We are all limited in our

ability to criticize our own work, and sometimes an outside opinion can help us see how to

improve or strengthen our communication. Your objective is to produce the best possible

product; don’t let pride of authorship and fear of criticism close your mind to suggestions from

other people. Also, what we write or say at work often must be approved by our chain of

command through a formal coordination process. Your supervisor needs to see it, the executive

officer needs to see it, then the big boss and so on. Chapter 9 provides tips on how to give and

receive feedback and how to manage the coordination process.

SUMMARY: In this chapter, we summarized a systematic process—Seven Steps to Effective

Communication—that will help you achieve the five FOCUS principles. These steps will help

you improve your writing and speaking products. Each step is described in greater detail in

subsequent chapters. The table on the next page lists the seven steps for effective

communication and where you can find more information about each step in this handbook.

CHAPTER 2:

Seven Steps To Effective Communication (Overview)

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Seven Steps to Effective Communication: Quick Reference List

THE BASIC STEPS… FOR MORE DETAILS, REFER TO:

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience

Chapter 3

2. Research Your Topic

Chapter 4

3. Support Your Ideas

Chapter 5

4. Organize and Outline

Chapter 6

5. Draft

Chapter 7 (Writing); Chapter 11 (Speaking)

6. Edit

Chapter 8 (Writing); Chapter 11 (Speaking)

7. Fight for Feedback and Get Approval

Chapter 9

PART II:

Preparing to Write and Speak

- 14 -

PART II:

PREPARING TO WRITE

AND SPEAK

CHAPTER 3:

Step 1 (Analyze Purpose and Audience)

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CHAPTER 3:

Step 1

(Analyze Purpose and Audience)

This chapter covers:

• Key Questions

• What Is My Purpose?

• Drafting a Purpose Statement

• Analyzing Purpose: Other Issues

• Audience Analysis: The Human Factor

• Tips for Success

In Chapter 2, we introduced the Seven Steps for Effective Communication. Now we’re going to

discuss the first of these steps in further detail. First and most importantly, you can save yourself

a lot of work by asking yourself if the briefing slides, memo, e-mail or meeting is going to help

get the mission done or a task accomplished. In today’s fast-paced work environment, we don’t

need to create unnecessary work for anyone.

Once you’re clear on the need for communication, Step 1 requires you to get clear on your

purpose and audience. As you’ll see in this chapter, these are not two distinct categories. The

characteristics of your audience will influence all parts of your message and your purpose often

involves influencing your audience. To begin analyzing purpose and audience you should

consider several key questions.

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Key Questions

Masters in the art of communication stay focused on their objective and approach audience

analysis seriously. The more you know about your audience, the more comfortable you will feel.

Where do you start in this? Here are some questions to help you begin to analyze your purpose

and audience and get you on the right track. We’ll discuss many of them in more detail later in

the chapter.

• What is the overall purpose of the communication? Are you trying to make a change in

your audience? Are you writing just to inform your audience?

• If you had one sentence or 30 seconds to explain your specific objective, what would you

write or say? (What is your “elevator speech” on the subject?)

• What format are you using to communicate? How much time do you have to prepare?

• Is there anything unusual about the time and place your audience will receive your

communication (is it 1600 on a Friday before a holiday weekend)? A lengthy

informative e-mail sent out late on a Friday afternoon may not be appreciated or even

worse—not read!

• Who will read this communication? Your boss? Your subordinates? Civilians? The

answers will have a direct bearing on the tone and formality of your message.

• What are the education levels, career fields and areas of expertise of your readers and/or

listeners?

• Do you need to supply any background information, explanation of terms, or other

information to your audience? Does your audience have experience with the ideas and

concepts you are presenting?

• What does the audience think of you? Are you known and trusted?

• Is your audience motivated to hear and/or read your communication?

• Do you need to coordinate your communication?

• Are you making promises your organization will have to keep?

What Is My Purpose?

Most Air Force writing or speaking falls under one of the following purposes: to direct, inform,

persuade or inspire. Your task is to think about the message you want to send (the “what”) and

make some sort of determination of what your purpose is (the “why”). Some communication has

primary and secondary purposes, so don’t kill yourself trying to make sure your message fits

neatly in one of these categories. Once you decide the purpose, you’ll know where to place the

emphasis and what the tone of your communication should be. Here’s a quick synopsis of these

purposes and how they might work for you.

• To Direct. Directive communication is generally used to pass on information describing

actions you expect to be carried out by your audience. The emphasis in directive

communication is clear, concise directions and expectations of your audience.

CHAPTER 3:

Step 1 (Analyze Purpose and Audience)

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• To Inform. The goal of informative communication is to pass on information to the

audience. The communication is successful if the audience understands the message

exactly the way the speaker or writer intended. The emphasis in informative

communication is clear, direct communication with accurate and adequate information

tailored to the education and skill levels of the audience. Audience feedback and

interaction may be appropriate in some situations to make sure they “got the message.”

• To Persuade. Persuasive communication is typically used when you are trying to “sell”

your audience on a new idea, new policy, new product or change in current operations.

Though emotions are one tool of persuasion, most persuasive communication in the

workplace requires convincing evidence put together in a logical way. Audience analysis

is critical because different audiences have different views on what evidence is

convincing. Since the purpose is to guide your audience to a specific course of action,

you cannot overlook tone and delivery. Chapter 5, Supporting Your Ideas, describes how

to build your persuasive skills.

• To Inspire. One final purpose for writing or speaking that doesn’t get much attention but

is frequently used in the military is to inspire. As you climb the leadership ladder you

will increasingly be requested to perform retirements, promotions, commander’s calls—

opportunities where you will want to inspire the audience with your profound insight on

someone’s career or possibly your philosophy on leadership. Although protocol drives

portions of these events, the opportunity to send a personal message and inspire the

audience should not be overlooked. The emphasis in inspirational communication is

delivery, a thorough knowledge of your topic and likewise your audience.

Regardless of whether your mission is to direct, inform, persuade or inspire, there are general

principles that apply to almost all communication. See “Tips for Success” at the end of this

chapter to round out your portfolio for analyzing purpose and audience.

Drafting a Purpose Statement

OK, you have a feel for the general purpose of your communication (to direct, inform, persuade

or inspire), but what is your “bottom line” you need to communicate to your audience? If you

have difficulty nailing down your objective, your audience will be equally confused.

One way to make sure you’re clear on your objective is to write a purpose statement, which is

one sentence that captures the essence of what you’re trying to do—your “bottom line.” It’s the

one sentence you’d keep if you were allowed only one. Developing a clear purpose statement

will help you in two ways:

• It will help you focus as you develop your communication.

• It will help your audience focus when you deliver your message.

Think about it; your audience wants a clear statement of your position and where you are going.

This is especially true when your audience consists of higher-ranking individuals with many

demands on their time and issues requiring their attention. Now, let’s look at some examples of

draft purpose statements:

• To inform individuals in the Civil Engineering Squadron about new policies on

hazardous waste disposal.

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• To encourage (inspire) at-risk high school students to work hard, stay in school and have

hope in the future.

• To persuade the division chief to buy three laptops for use during official travel.

As we’ll mention in chapter 5, you may update your purpose statement after researching your

topic. (For example, you might find out you need four laptops, not three.) Even if it isn’t locked

down, a draft statement will help guide your research and support efforts.

Analyzing Purpose: Other Issues

Knowing your “bottom line” is not the end of analyzing purpose. Here are some questions you

want to ask to make sure you look at all parts of the equation. The answers will help refine your

purpose and shape your entire project.

• What format will I use to communicate? Today’s commanders are increasingly more

vigilant of the value of their troops’ time—and their own. Make sure that the

communication is required and that you select the most appropriate format for delivery.

Think about how much time you will have to deliver your message before you go any

further. Will you have 2 minutes in a staff meeting with the general that starts in 1 hour?

One hour at your commander’s call next week?

• How much time do I have to prepare my communication? The breadth and scope of a

report your boss needs the next day will be different than a staff project due by the end of

the fiscal year. What’s the suspense? How long is it going to take to write the report?

Be sure to budget adequate time for all “Seven Steps,” especially “Researching your

Topic” (Step 2), “Drafting” (Step 5) and “Editing” (Step 6). If coordination is part of the

master plan, it will also affect your timelines.

There’s more to successful communication than getting clear on purpose. There’s always that

human factor and in the communication game that translates to analyzing your audience.

Audience Analysis: The Human Factor

As stated in chapter 1, all communication involves a sender, a message and an audience. “A”

sends the message (either verbally or in writing) with a specific intended meaning to “B.” “B”

receives the message, processes the message and attaches perceived meaning to the message.

This is where it gets interesting. Did the intended message actually get to “B”? Was the

perceived meaning what “A” intended? If not, why not?

Know Yourself

Before you look around, look in the mirror. Knowing your strengths and weaknesses will help

you meet your communication goals.

• Do you do better with certain communication formats than others? Be aware of your

personal strengths. If you know that you’d rather be buried in a pile of fire ants than

speak in public, you may choose to send your message in writing—if that’s an option. If

not, spend some time in chapter 10 and improve your speaking skills!

CHAPTER 3:

Step 1 (Analyze Purpose and Audience)

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• Are you an inexperienced briefer that needs notes? If so, make sure they are written in a

format that is easy to refer to while the general is listening intently and watching the

beads of sweat form on your forehead.

• Do you have expertise in the area? If so … great! But don’t lose your audience with lots

of lingo and unfamiliar jargon. You may think it’s cool; others may not. On the other

hand, if you lack expertise in the area, you will need to focus your research to beef up on

unfamiliar territory. Remember, there’s always someone in the crowd that knows as

much or more, so you want to be as prepared as possible to answer potential questions.

• What is your relationship with the audience? Are you personally familiar with them?

You may be able to present a more informal briefing or written document if you know

this is acceptable to the audience. See the section on tone for more guidance.

Know Your Organization

Once you’ve taken a hard look at yourself, take a look at your work environment and your

organization. In the military we rarely act or speak in a vacuum. Often we represent our

organization, unit or functional area and must understand them and accommodate their views,

capabilities or concerns in our communications. The following questions may help bring things

into focus.

• Am I promising something my organization can deliver? (You can substitute boss or

personnel for organization.) If not, why are you bothering?

• Is what I’m saying consistent with previous policy or operating philosophy? If not, you

need to shift to a persuasive tone and explain why your approach warrants a change or

breach in policy.

• Who needs to coordinate on this? Who else owns a piece of this action? The

coordination game can be a mind maze, but if you leave a key player out, you will

undoubtedly hear about it.

Know Your Audience

The receiving audience falls into one of four sub-categories. Depending on the type of

communication and coordination needed, you may or may not deal with every one of them.

• Primary receiver: The person you directly communicate with either verbally or in

writing.

• Secondary receiver: People you indirectly communicate with through the primary

receivers. Let’s say, for example, that you’re a wing commander. You send an e-mail to

your wing first sergeants (primary receivers) identifying establishments near your base

that are now designated “off limits” to troops. The first sergeants forward this e-mail to

their unit personnel for “widest dissemination.” The secondary receivers would be the

troops that read the commander’s directive.

• Key decision makers: These are the most powerful members of the audience … the

ones that really make the decisions. Knowing who they are will help focus your attention

and potentially your delivery in larger briefings and certain written communication.

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• Gatekeepers: These are people in the chain that typically review the communication

before it reaches your intended audience. Knowing who they are and their expectations

can save you embarrassment and help ensure your success in the long run. We all know

that administrative assistants are keenly aware of their bosses’ preferences. Listen to

their inputs!

Knowing your audience is nothing new. When you consider warfare as an engagement of

strategy and the adversary is your audience (and you are the adversary’s audience!), then the

importance of knowing your audience is clear.

Therefore I say: Know the enemy and know yourself; in a hundred battles you

will never be in peril. When you are ignorant of the enemy but know yourself,

your chances of winning or losing are equal. If ignorant of your enemy and of

yourself, you are certain in every battle to be in peril.

–Sun Tzu

Sun Tzu was ahead of his time. He knew the importance of audience analysis! We’re not

recommending you view your audience as “the enemy,” but Sun Tzu had the right idea. It is

essential that we know the audience being engaged—in communication or in conflict. Read on

for some final tips for connecting with your audience.

Tips for Success

• RANK—don’t be afraid of it. Differences in military rank can be a real barrier to

communication. Too many of us become tongue-tied when communicating with those

senior in rank and cursory or impatient with those who are junior in rank. We must

constantly remind ourselves we are all communicative equals and should strive to be

candid, direct and respectful with everyone.

• JARGON—tailor to your audience. Don’t overestimate the knowledge and/or

expertise of your readers, but don’t talk down to them either. Be careful with excessive

use of career-field specific jargon and acronyms. Yes, they are second nature to most of

us in the military, but you can lose your audience with unfamiliar terminology.

• Be INCLUSIVE—remember our diverse force. Sometimes we inadvertently exclude

members of our audience by falling into communication traps involving references to

race, religion, ethnicity or sex. Remember this concept when designing your visual

support. Your visual aids should show a range of people who represent our Air Force.

Avoid traditional stereotyping of jobs based on sex or race. Inclusiveness also applies to

humor. Humor is not universal and joke telling is the biggest area where otherwise

sensitive people unknowingly get themselves into trouble. Knowing your audience and

adhering to good taste and sensitivity will keep you in check.

• TONE—more than what you say, it is how you say it. Closely tied to the purpose of

your communication is the tone you take with your audience. Speakers have gestures,

voice and movements to help them communicate. Writers only have words on paper.

How many times have you seen colleagues get bent out of shape over a misunderstood e-

mail? Why? Because the nonverbal signals available during face-to-face communication

are absent. Recognize this disadvantage in written communication and pay close

CHAPTER 3:

Step 1 (Analyze Purpose and Audience)

- 21 -

attention to it. Words that carry uncomplimentary insinuations (ignorant, opinionated)

make negative suggestions (failure, impossible) or call up unpleasant thoughts (liable,

unsuccessful) can potentially defeat your purpose.

• COURTESY—be polite (please!). The first rule of writing is to be polite. Forego

anger, criticism and sarcasm—strive to be reasonable and persuasive. Try not to

deliberately embarrass someone if it can be avoided with a more tactful choice of words.

Rudeness is a weak person’s imitation of strength.

• Make it PERSONAL—but it’s not all about you! When appropriate, use pronouns to

create instant rapport, show concern and keep your reader involved. Using pronouns also

keeps your writing from being monotonous, dry and abstract. The pronouns you’ll

probably use the most are you, yours, we, us and our. Use I, me, and my sparingly. One

rule of business writing is “put your audience first,” so when possible, avoid using I as

the first word of an opening sentence and avoid starting two sentences in a row with we

or I unless you’re trying to hammer home a point. These guidelines will help you to

avoid sounding self-centered and repetitive.

• FORMAL (“To be, or not to be”) versus INFORMAL (“hey dude”). Different

communication situations require different levels of formality. The informal tone is more

like a conversation between you and your reader and it is characterized by clear, direct,

active language. In today’s Air Force, most of your writing will be informal, though

ceremonies and awards may require more elaborate (formal) language. Whether your

tone is formal or informal, you still need to follow the accepted rules of grammar. In any

case, the best advice is to keep your writing clear, concise and simple. See chapter 7 for

more details.

• Be POSITIVE. To cultivate a positive tone, give praise where praise is due;

acknowledge acceptance before focusing on additional improvements; and express

criticism in the form of helpful questions, suggestions, requests, recommendations, or

clear directives rather than accusations. When having to give bad news, lead with a

neutral comment before jumping in with the bad news. Save the positive for the closing

by offering alternatives, etc. Stay away from using clichés, restating the refusal, hiding

bad news in a fog of wordiness and inappropriate apologizing. Your audience always

appreciates sincerity and honesty. To get you started thinking “positive,” listen for the

tone of the following sentences:

o Commanders will recommend only qualified persons for training. [Constructive]

o Commanders may not recommend for training any person who is not qualified.

[Destructive]

The following list provides additional tone comparisons to help you see the tone you may be

setting in your communication. This list is not absolute, but it does show how changing just one

word can change the tone of a communication, oral or written, and thereby lead to a different

conversation characterized by cooperation rather than conflict.

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Positive, Constructive Tone Negative, Destructive Tone

• reception area

• waiting room

• established policy

• old policy

• change of schedule

• postponement

• confirm meeting

• reminder

• competition is keen

• opportunity is limited

• start writing well

• stop writing badly

• use the big hoist

• don’t use the small hoist

• the cup is half full

• the cup is half empty

SUMMARY: This chapter covered the key concepts of analyzing your purpose and audience—

the first step towards developing effective communication. Getting clear on your purpose early

in the process helps you focus your preparation. Taking the time to understand your audience

will help you tailor your message to their knowledge, interests and motives. Once you’ve

determined your purpose, nailed down your purpose statement and carefully analyzed your

audience, you need to do some homework on your topic … that’s why it’s called research.

CHAPTER 4:

Step 2 (Research Your Topic)

- 23 -

CHAPTER 4:

Step 2

(Research Your Topic)

This chapter covers:

• Start Smart

• Getting Data

• Search Engines and Databases

• Evaluate Your Sources

• Useful Online Resources

Whether your communication goal is to persuade or inform, you’ll need more than fancy words

to win the day—you’ll need substance as well as style. Once you’re clear on your purpose and

audience (Step 1), you’ll need to research your topic to uncover information that will support

your communication goals.

In some ways, research has never been easier—electronic databases and the Internet give us

access to quantities of information unthinkable 20 years ago. But new opportunities bring new

challenges. With so much information, how do we find the data we need to meet our purpose?

And how do we know a source should be trusted? This chapter gives some basic suggestions

that will be useful in nearly any assignment.

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Start Smart

The day will come when you need to research a topic; how do you approach the task? If you do

a little early planning, you’ll be more focused and effective when searching for data and

information. Start smart and do a little preparation before starting your research.

The word “research” is often used to describe a multistep investigation process used to either

answer a question or solve a problem. Academic research expands knowledge by finding

answers to questions, while nearly all military staff research revolves around identifying and

solving problems. This chapter emphasizes information retrieval and evaluation of sources—this

chapter does not describe the end-to-end process associated with academic research (see

Appendix 2) or details of systematic problem solving (also covered in a separate chapter).

Nonetheless, for simple projects, planning means spending a few quiet moments thinking about

your task. For longer projects, you may write out a detailed research plan. Regardless of the

scope, think through these issues:

Review the Purpose and Scope of the Overall Project

After completing Step 1, Analyzing Purpose and Audience, you should have a good idea of what

you need, but sometimes your purpose and scope may evolve as you learn more about the topic.

You may also need to do some preliminary research just to get smart enough to scope out the

effort. If you’ve been handed a vague topic, try to get some feel for how far you should go in

your research, what you can realistically do and where you should stop.

Assign Yourself a Deadline for the Research Effort

It’s easy to get lost in the research process. Don’t do an outstanding job of data retrieval, then a

marginal job on the presentation because you ran out of time. For larger projects, assign yourself

a timeline for the data gathering process.

Get a Vector from the Boss

Ask the boss if there are unusual sources or knowledgeable individuals you should seek out.

Your boss gave you this research problem for a reason—he or she thought that you were capable

of finding the answer. Even if you can eventually find the answer on your own, you might save

some time by asking for suggestions on where to start. An early vector could be particularly

helpful if you’re working on a practical problem that’s “local,” specialized, or requires

information that isn’t available to the general public.

How Much Do I Know Already; What Are My Biases?

Before you look for answers outside yourself, look in the mirror first. You may have valuable

knowledge about an assigned research project, but you need to acknowledge and guard against

your own biases in working a research problem. It’s tough to keep an unbiased attitude; in fact,

it’s probably impossible if you know anything about the subject in question. The good news is

once you realize you may be biased, you’ll be less likely to automatically dismiss data that’s not

consistent with your personal philosophy.

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Getting Data

Three things will probably influence how you approach the data gathering process:

• Your research topic.

• Your experience as a researcher and your expertise in this research area.

• Your experience with Internet and electronic database searches.

If you are seeking information that’s publicly available and are comfortable with electronic

search tools, you’d probably start with the Internet. If you are dealing with a local problem, a

sensitive topic, or feel uncomfortable with the research process or search technology, you’ll

probably want to start by talking to another person. Regardless of the order you approach them,

here are four major categories of information:

Coworkers, Base Personnel

These are colleagues that you can easily meet face to face who may be subject matter experts on

your topic. They may also know where you can get valuable information on local projects, even

if they are not subject matter experts themselves. The person who gave you the research

assignment may also be a resource. Get clear on the big picture and be specific when you ask

others for information—you’ll save everybody’s time.

Your Office Files and References

Data from work, in hard copy and electronic files, may be valuable sources of information.

Some older files may still be stored in hard copy records in your office, but in most offices, the

majority of current information on policies and procedures is contained on computer networks,

the Electronic Records Management (ERM) solution (file plan), or electronic record keeping

system Paper files are still used for correspondence, sensitive information and older archives;

however, the US Office of Management and Budget Memorandum M-12-18, Managing

Government Records Directive, requires that to the fullest extent possible, Federal agencies such

as the Air Force to create and manage records electronically and not in paper. Each office has its

own policies, check them out. In addition to office files, larger units typically produce unit

histories that can be very useful for staff research. They tell what happened as well as when it

happened, why, and where. A good history also shows how past experiences relate to current

plans and how recent experiences relate to future plans.

The Internet

The amount of information available from your computer is nearly limitless. The Internet can be

intimidating if you didn’t grow up with computers, but set your fears aside—the payoffs are

enormous. The two biggest challenges in using the Internet are 1) finding the information you

need; and 2) sorting out what you can believe and what you can’t. Anyone with an ax to grind

can build a website and there’s no one out there checking to see if the facts are correct. It’s an

interesting environment—information ranges from official, credible sources to the lunatic fringe,

and websites may appear and disappear without notice. Later in this chapter, we’ll give you

details on searching the net and evaluating what you find. Be aware that copyright law now

protects all materials the instant it is reduced to tangible form.

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The Library

Libraries have unique benefits for the researcher:

• Librarians (real, honest-to-goodness humans!) who can help you find information and

give basic research advice.

• Free access to books and periodicals—some of which may be available on the Internet.

• Access to the Internet and other electronic databases not always free to the public.

• Interlibrary loans that let you borrow nearly any book in print—even at small libraries

Though the Internet is a convenient source of information, you may eventually run into a point

where the information you need is not available on the Internet, but it may still be found in books

and periodicals, available for use freely at your local library. Libraries can also be of assistance

in evaluating the quality of the information since most content in a library has been reviewed by

someone other than the author. The end result is less trash and outright errors than you find out

on the Internet. You will find a wealth of resources at your local base, city, or college and

university libraries. Even if you can’t borrow books, many of them allow nonstudents to visit

and read books.

“Virtual libraries” are another important resource—they’re websites that give you access to

several library resources. Though these can be reached through an Internet browser, the

information meets the same quality standards as the material in the physical library.

• Muir S. Fairchild Research Information Center (MSFRIC)

(

http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/lane.htm) has online research tools and traditional library

resources that include access to databases, bibliographies, online library assistance, full-

text journal articles, relevant research links and assignment assistance for the Professional

Military Education (PME).

• Internet Public Library (http://www.ipl.org/) organizes websites, e-texts, online

magazines and other journals by subject/topic.

• WWW Virtual Library (http://vlib.org/) has topic-based links to sites usually

maintained by universities and research centers.

• The Library of Congress (http://www.loc.gov) has excellent tools for research,

including an Ask the Librarian feature for some topics.

• The Library of Congress Online Catalog (http://catalog.loc.gov/) includes online help

pages on a variety of different searches–from basic to complex.

Search Engines and Databases

Search engines and database searches were once the realm of only the experienced Internet

surfer. Today, finding relevant, quality information is fairly simple. Simply choose a search

engine, enter what you are looking for into the search window and select enter. Within a fraction

of a second the search engine will typically find scores of resources for you in an instant. From

this basic search, you can conduct your preliminary research, find outlying sources and different

views, or refine your search criteria with the terms you find from each successive search.

CHAPTER 4:

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Search engines and Internet browsers are excellent tools to start your research but there are

cautions. Search engines look for and find only what you ask of them—they do not evaluate the

quality of the source. This is a risky venture for most research that you will be called upon to

generate in your career. A better option is to use the academic databases provided by your local

university library, if you can get access, or through the MSFRIC for students and faculty enrolled

in Air University courses. Academic databases contain thousands of rigorous, peer-reviewed

articles that are suitable for substantiating claims with research-based evidence.

Starting Points

There are many starting points on the Internet which may introduce you to your topic and/or

point you to important resources. Reputable sources are those with verifiable, researched

information, such as found in virtual libraries and library databases. There are also a host of

shared content sites, such as wikis, that may also get you started; however, be warned that

information from public sites where the content is generated by anyone with access to the

internet should be questioned and subjected to verification before becoming that key point in

your paper or presentation. Remember, starting points are best for getting to know some basics

about your topic so you can refine your search engine terms to find reputable sources.

• Wikipedia

(http://www.wikipedia.org/) is considered by many to not be citable in a

formal research paper, due to the anonymous nature of contributors. However, it often

proves a very useful introduction to a subject and in the margin or at the bottom of the

article there are usually links to usable sources, sometimes primary sources.

• Yahoo!

Directory (http://dir.yahoo.com/) is an example of a directory of topics and

subtopics, with links to references, to survey the resources available for a given topic.

• Open Directory Project (http://www.dmoz.org/) is another extensive directory of links

organized by topic.

• Congressional Research Service (CRS) reports, short summaries written by subject

matter experts at the Library of Congress, are excellent starting points for becoming

familiar with a topic. See the government resources section later for information on

finding CRS reports.

Search Engines

If you do not know exactly what you want, you’ll need to use a search engine to find websites

that have useful information. Search engines use key words and phrases to search the Internet.

Some allow you to type in questions and most have catalogs that sort a limited number of sites

by topic. For whichever search engine you’re using, look first for a link to “advanced” search

tools on that search engine. You may also want to do a search for hints and tips for using that

search engine. Getting to know your search engine may greatly improve your search results as

well as speed up your search. One popular search engine is Google

which can be found by

typing “www.Google.com” into your Internet browser. Once you are at the site, type in a few

words or phrases that describe the main concepts of a topic. Google

only returns web pages

that contain all the words you type in, making it easy to refine or narrow your search. It will

definitely be worth your time to search for hints and tips on doing Google

searches. Much of

what you learn will also carry over to other search engines.

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• The use of the <site:___> operator to restrict searches. Most search engines have the

site: operator, which can be used to search the .mil or other domains, or even specific

folders on a site. Just type in the search box the term(s) you wish to search for and then

add site:domain [site then colon then domain, with no space on either side of the colon].

Below are examples. Here and elsewhere in this chapter < and > enclose the search terms

to be typed into the search engines, but the < and > are not themselves typed in.

o <doctrine site:mil> will search for doctrine on all DoD public web pages.

o <space doctrine site:af.mil> will search Air Force pages for space doctrine.

o <future warfare site:au.af.mil/au/awc/awcgate/cst/> will search for future warfare in

the research papers written by Air War College students for the Center for Strategy

and Technology. Those papers were discovered to be in this folder.

o <china site:cia.gov> will search the CIA site for information on China.

• Refining your keyword searches to improve search efficiency. Once you’re

comfortable with the Internet, you may want to learn some tricks to improve your search

efficiency. Most search engines use the tools below or variations on them. Learn the

“advanced” features of whichever search engine you use. Many of the features

mentioned for Google™ also apply to other search engines.

• Use “and” or the plus symbol “+” to make sure that your search engine gives you pages

that have all the words you enter. For example, either of these searches will keep you

away from sites that describe military aviation, but not military aviation accidents.

o <Military AND aviation AND accidents>

o <Military+aviation+accidents>

• Use “not” or the minus symbol “-” to eliminate sites with unrelated words that clutter

your search. For example, if you’re looking for Microsoft

Windows 8 information but

keep getting Windows 7 or Windows Vista sites, you can eliminate them by using the

following search (Note: The Google™ search engine requires a space before the minus

sign, but none between it and the term to be eliminated).

o <Windows 8 -7 -Vista >

o <Windows 8 NOT 7 NOT Vista>

• Using Quotation Marks (“ ”) to get websites that have your search words in the order

you specify. For example, <“Operation Desert Storm”> gives a much tighter search than

<Operation+Desert+Storm>.

• Google™ automatically searches for synonyms, but you can turn that off by putting

quotes around a word. For example <Internet searching “tips”> would yield results only

for tips–not guides, help, or tutorials–about Internet searching.

• Other Google™ operators (a sampling): for more, do a search on Google™ operators.

o cache: shows Google™ cache of a page, such as cache: cia.gov

o related: shows pages on related topics, such as related: nasa.gov

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o define: shows a word’s definition, such as define: pecuniary

o filetype: limits search to only those type files, such as filetype: pdf

• Combining Operations: Once you’ve got the basics down, you can combine operations.

For example, <“Operation IRAQI FREEDOM” AND “Air Operations”> gives you

relevant sites on Air Operations during Operation IRAQI FREEDOM. If you want to

research Operation DESERT STORM, but do not want information relating to Gulf War

Syndrome, you can use the form below to subtract topics you do not want:

<“Operation DESERT STORM” + “Air Operations”–“gulf war syndrome”>

• Internet searches require some judgment. If you don’t use enough keywords to

narrow your topic, you’ll end up spending a lot of time scanning sites and trying to find

the ones that are most relevant. On the other hand, a tightly focused search might

overlook a relevant citation. There are no easy answers, but through trial and error you’ll

probably find the balance that works for your particular topic. In either case, you must

evaluate the quality of the information (see below).

• Search Engine Options. If you’re having trouble finding material on your topic, you

might try more than one search engine. Different search engines may yield different

results and some specialize in certain fields of study. To find out more details, do an

Internet search for current rankings and recommendations. Here are some of the current

search engines at the time of publication: Google

, Yahoo!

, and Bing

• Specialized Military and Government Search Engines. Several search engines are

tailored to search for military and government information. Search.USA.gov

(http://usasearch.gov) searches over 30 million US government web pages.

Searchmil.com, Google™ powered, searches the .mil domain. The Center for Army

Lessons Learned (CALL) has a search function that searches multiple military-related

sites, including CALL, Army, Army Field Manuals, Army regulations and other sites.

DoD registered log-in is required for full access.

• Other Specialized Search Engines. Following searches are examples of how to find

search engines that may specialize in your topic, or that may combine results from

multiple search engines (these are called meta search engines).

o <international relations search engine> will yield results that include search engines

or directories that specialize in international relations.

o <meta search engine list> will point you to the latest meta search engines.

o <international relations meta search engine> will lead to meta search engines that

deal with international relations. There may not always be such engines, depending

on the topic area.

Did you know? The words AND, OR and NOT, when used between keywords

in a database search, are called Boolean operators. Boolean operators were

developed in the 1800s by George Boole, an English mathematician. Boolean

operators are heavily used in the design of electronic circuits.

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Evaluate Your Sources

Once you’ve found websites on your topic, you need to decide which ones to take seriously.

Some feel that a positive attitude is the key to success in life, but in the case of the Internet, your

attitude should be deep suspicion unless the source is official and you can confirm the site is

what it pretends to be. Numerous credible web sources with a known pedigree can be found

through the MSFRIC (http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/lane.htm). Domain searches of .mil, .gov,

or .edu may lead you to some of the more credible sources, but factual errors may be present in

any domain and there are many sites that may be factually incorrect or deliberately misleading.

When looking at a website, ask yourself some questions. Who is responsible for the website and

can you confirm that? How distant are the authors from the “event” they are writing about? (See

the section later in this chapter on primary, secondary and tertiary sources.) What are the

authors’ motives? Are they part of a group whose goal is to influence public opinion or to sell

you something? Are there things about the site that make you question its accuracy, objectivity

or currency? Take a look at the checklist on the next page for more specifics to add to your

paranoia.

Another way to build confidence in the information you gather is to seek confirmation of the

facts from multiple sources. The weaker the source, the more important it is to get a second

opinion before believing it. Most of us instinctively do this in the workplace—we have a very

short list of people we absolutely believe every time they open their mouths (these folks usually

don’t talk much!), we have a longer list of people who are right most of the time and then there’s

usually one or two who have no credibility whatsoever. If the issue is important and you want to

be sure, try to get the answer in stereo.

• <evaluating web sources site: edu> searches university sites for criteria and tips

on evaluating web resources. There are some excellent such sites.

• <evaluating web sources site: loc.gov> searches the Library of Congress site for

help with evaluating online sources.

While the guide on the following page provides an excellent overview of evaluating a web

source, you may want to do the searches above to see if any new criteria come into play as the

Internet continues to evolve. Social media, blogs and crowd-sourced references may need

additional methods for evaluating their accuracy, currency and other criteria.

A note on Wikis, Blogs, e-journals and social media posts. The central goal of the Internet is

the sharing of information. However, as access to the electronic archives has improved, so have

the posts of less credible sources. This is not to say that the information found from a less

credible source is wrong or invalid, but it is to say that the quality and credibility of an argument

is only as good as the quality and credibility of the sources used. So how do you use these types

of sources in your research? The Tongue and Quill recommends that wikis, blogs, e-journals and

social media be treated as bread crumbs on the trail to creating basic understanding of a topic and

any corollary issues that may be relevant. The fact is just about everyone uses these sources to

get started in finding out more on a topic—be it from the news of the day to more challenging

staff research. However, these sites are not considered authoritative and should not be sited as

the evidence to support any claim in a credible research effort of any kind. Bottom Line: Wikis

can get you intellectually started but there are no shortcuts for obtaining valid, credible,

authoritative content to support claims—you must do some digging.

CHAPTER 4:

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When evaluating a source, one factor to consider is the distance between the writer and his or her

subject. Since people and their research are often misquoted, it’s better to refer back to original

material than rely on someone else’s interpretation of existing work. This is true for research

published in books and print journals, as well as Internet sites. The material you find can be

classified as either a primary, secondary or tertiary source.

• A primary source is a first-hand account of an historical event, a physical artifact or

record of that event or a description of research written by the people that actually

performed it.

• A secondary source is one step removed from the event or research. It documents the

findings of someone else who took the time to review primary sources.

• A tertiary source summarizes findings published in secondary sources.

Let’s look at some examples. If you were doing research on a friendly fire incident, primary

sources would include interviews of the parties involved, radio recordings, gun camera footage

and black box recordings. The Summary of Official Findings published by the investigation

board would be a secondary source. A tertiary source might be a magazine article that quoted

the Summary of Official Findings as part of a larger discussion on the topic.

If you wanted to learn about the foundations of logic and persuasion in Western culture, a

primary source would be essays on the subject by the Greek philosopher Aristotle, a secondary

source would be an academic textbook that refers back to these writings and a tertiary source

would be a lecture given by an instructor that used the academic textbook as a reference.

In general, primary and secondary sources are considered more reliable than tertiary sources.

Each level of interpretation can introduce potential errors or bias and ideas can be misquoted or

quoted out of context. On the other hand, sometimes a tertiary source might be useful to get a

“big picture view” of a topic before you start slogging through primary and secondary sources.

Useful Online Resources

In some situations, you may want to start your research by referring to one authoritative and

relevant source instead of searching the library or Internet. This might be particularly useful for

situations where you want a quick and official answer to a relatively noncontroversial topic. The

lists of sources that follow are either “official” in nature or involve publications that typically

include at least one layer of critical review. Those sources that have not been critically reviewed

will be fairly obvious. Be aware that online resources and links change quickly; the links below

represent a snapshot of what was available as this edition went into publication.

Air Force Sources

• Air Force Link (http://www.af.mil/). The official website of the United States Air

Force with the latest Air Force news, career information, biographies, images, and a host

of information useful to all members of the Department of the Air Force,. There are links

to other related sites including the full text of key reports, the online version of Airman

Magazine, other publications and social media sites.

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• Air Force Portal (https://www.my.af.mil/). The Air Force portal combines a number of

Air Force websites and computer systems into one common interface. Individuals must

• Air Force Publications (http://www.e-publishing.af.mil). The full-text of most

standard Air Force publications.

• Air Force Historical Research Agency (AFHRA) (http://www.afhra.af.mil/). This

agency’s holdings consist of over 70,000,000 pages devoted to the history of the United

States Air Force. Contact information is listed on the AFHRA home page above.

• Air University (AU) Press (http://aupress.au.af.mil/). The AU Press publication

program is designed primarily to help war fighters and policy makers understand and

apply air, space and cyber power in peacetime and conflict. AU Press publishes books,

monographs and research papers by military authors and civilian scholars.

• Air War College (AWC) Gateway to Internet Resources

(http://www.au.af.mil/au/awc/awcgate/awcgate.htm). This site includes documents

and links organized for topics across the breadth of military and national security issues

and resources.

• Internet Searching Tools (http://www.au.af.mil/au/awc/awcgate/awc-srch.htm). This

site includes links helpful for anyone wishing to improve their Internet research skills.

• Morning Report (https://cs.eis.af.mil/afpa/AFStory/default.aspx). The Morning

Report is produced by the Secretary of the Air Force Office of Public Affairs. Access

requires a dot.mil connection and secure login. Once logged in, click on the “Links

Version” banner for the current Morning Report.

• Muir S. Fairchild Research Information Center (MSFRIC)

(http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/lane.htm). The Muir S. Fairchild Research Information

Center, founded in 1946 as the Air University Library, is the premier library in DoD.

MSFRIC improves Air Force education by providing access to the world of information

through quality library services. Resources available on the website include access to

databases, bibliographies, online library assistance, full-text journal articles, relevant

research links and assignment assistance for students and faculty enrolled in AU courses.

Submit research requests at: http://www.au.af.mil/mailer/index.asp?AUL-Reference.

Other US Military Services

• US Army (http://www.army.mil/). This is the official website of the US Army. It

provides the latest news, as well as information about careers, a library (of public

websites), an image gallery and social media links.

• US Army Publications (http://www.apd.army.mil/). The full text of most standard

Army publications.

• US Army Military History Institute (USAHMI)

(http://www.carlisle.army.mil/AHEC/USAMHI/). USAHMI collects, organizes,

preserves and makes available source materials on American military history to the

CHAPTER 4:

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defense community, academic researchers and the public. Research requests can be

submitted using the submittal info on the site.

• US Coast Guard (http://www.uscg.mil/). The official website of the US Coast Guard.

It provides the latest news, as well as information about careers, a library (of public

websites) and an image gallery.

• US Marine Corps (http://www.marines.mil/). The official website of the US Marine

Corps. It provides the latest news, as well as information about careers, a library (of

public websites), an image gallery and social media links

• US Marine Corps Publications (http://www.marines.mil/news/publications/). The

full-text of most standard Marine Corps publications.

• US Marine Corps History Division (http://www.tecom.usmc.mil/HD/). The official

United States Marine Corps History Division website. This site provides a variety of

information about the division and most importantly on the histories and traditions of the

United States Marine Corps.

• US Navy (http://www.navy.mil/). The official website of the US Navy. It provides the

latest news, as well as information about careers, a library (of public websites), an image

gallery and social media links.

• US Navy Issuances, Manuals and Directives (http://doni.daps.dla.mil/).

The full-text of most standard Navy directives.

• US Naval History & Heritage Command (http://www.history.navy.mil/).

The Naval Historical Center is the official history program of the Department of the

Navy. It includes a museum, art gallery, research library, archives and curator as well as

research and writing programs.

• National Guard (http://www.nationalguard.mil/). The official website of the National

Guard. It provides the latest news, as well as information about careers, a library (of

public websites), an image gallery and social media links.

• Reserve Affairs (http://ra.defense.gov/). The official website for reserve affairs. It

provides the latest news, as well as information about careers, a library (of public

websites), an image gallery and social media links.

Department of Defense (DoD) Sources

• Defense.gov (http://www.defense.gov/Defense.gov). The official website for the

Department of Defense and the starting point for finding US military information online.

It contains links to publications, statements, social media, etc.

• Defense Technical Information Center (DTIC) (http://www.dtic.mil/DTIC). DTIC

serves the DoD community as the largest central resource for DoD and government-

funded scientific, technical, engineering and business related information available today.

The DTIC network provides access to all unclassified, unlimited documents added into

DTIC since December 1974. Descriptive summaries and full-text files are available for

some documents.

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• Early Bird. This service was discontinued effective 1 Nov 13.

See Morning Report, above, under “Air Force Sources.”

• Foreign Military Studies Office (http://fmso.leavenworth.army.mil/). The Foreign

Military Studies Office (FMSO) at Fort Leavenworth, Kansas, is an open source research

organization of the US Army. FMSO conducts unclassified research of foreign

perspectives of defense and security issues that are understudied or unconsidered but that

are important for understanding the environments in which the US military operates.

• Joint Electronic Library (http://www.dtic.mil/doctrine/index.html). The Joint

Electronic Library (JEL) provides access to full-text copies of Joint Publications, the

Department of Defense Dictionary, Service Publications, History Publications, Chairman

of the Joint Chiefs of Staff (CJCS) Directives, research papers and other publications.

• MERLN (http://merln.ndu.edu/). The Military Education Research Library Network

(MERLN) is a comprehensive website devoted to international military education

outreach. It represents a consortium of military education research libraries that work

together to provide access to a variety of unique electronic resources for the use of

researchers and scholars. On the Internet since 1990, MERLN provides indexing to

significant articles, news items, editorials and book reviews appearing in military and

aeronautical periodicals, many of which are not indexed elsewhere. MERLN also

provides access to the major library catalogs of several PME schools.

Military Bibliographies

A bibliography is a great starting point for research. These bibliographies are compiled by

librarians who have examined relevant sources from Internet sites, books, documents, magazine

articles, and videos. Some of the most useful military bibliographies include

• Muir S. Fairchild Research Information Center (MSFRIC) Bibliographies.

(http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/bib97.htm).

• Joint Forces Staff College Library.

(http://www.jfsc.ndu.edu/library/publications/bibliography/).

• Marine Corps University Research Guides (http://guides.grc.usmcu.edu/).

• Naval Postgraduate School (http://www.nps.edu/Library/).

• US Army Military History Institute (http://www.carlisle.army.mil/ahec/USAMHI/).

• US Army War College Library

(http://www.carlisle.army.mil/library/bibliographies.htm).

Military Newspaper and Magazine Indexes and Lists

Some indexes listed below require a paid subscription. Contact your local or base library for free

availability using their subscription.

• Air University Library Index to Military Periodicals (AULIMP)

(http://aulimp.au.af.mil). AULIMP is produced by the MSFRIC and contains citations

to articles in English language military journals. The MSFRIC (formally AU Library)

has been producing AULIMP since 1949 and material after 1987 is available on the web.

CHAPTER 4:

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• DoD and Military Electronic Journals

(http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/periodicals/DoDelecj.htm). An electronic list compiled

and maintained by the staff of the MSFRIC.

• Read Military News (http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/periodicals/milnews.htm). A

listing of defense and military service news including base newspapers compiled and

maintained by MSFRIC.

• Staff College Automated Military Periodicals Index (SCAMPI)

(http://www.dtic.mil/dtic/scampi/). Developed to support the Armed Forces Staff

College; SCAMPI provides selected citations to journal articles and selected documents

and reports. Subject, author, and keyword indexing is provided.

Other Government Sources

• Census Bureau (http://www.census.gov/). The Census Bureau website has

demographic, geographic, business and other data. It also has US population projections,

fact books, interactive maps and world statistics.

• CIA (http://www.cia.gov). This is the CIA home page. The site has several useful

publications, including The World Fact Book, World Leaders and maps.

• Congress. See THOMAS below. You can also search for testimony and committee

minutes and other information by searching for <searchterm site:house.gov> or

<searchterm site: senate.gov>.

• Congressional Research Service Reports. (http://www.loc.gov/crsinfo/). These are

short reports created by the Congressional Research Service (CRS) and the Library of

Congress subject matter experts to update members of Congress on a wide range of

topics. You can search for individual reports on this site or from a search engine. Search

for <searchterm “Congressional Research Service”> to find CRS reports containing the

searchterm. Add “site: state.gov” to search the wealth of CRS reports continually

updated on the State Department website. Add “site: fas.org” to search the FAS library

of CRS reports.

• Copyright Office (http://copyright.gov/). Copyright Office site includes handouts and

research guides on copyright law and practice.

• Federal Digital System–GPO Access (http://www.gpo.gov/fdsys/). FDsys is the

Government Printing Office’s Federal Digital System which provides public access to

government publications.

• FEDSTATS (http://www.fedstats.gov/). Statistics from more than 100 government

agencies.

• Government Accountability Office (GAO) (http://www.gao.gov/). The US

Government Accountability Office (GAO) is an independent, nonpartisan agency that

works for Congress. Often called the “congressional watchdog,” GAO investigates how

the federal government spends taxpayer dollars. Their unclassified reports on are on this

website.

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• Government Printing Office (GPO) (http://www.gpo.gov/). Includes the GPO

bookstore.

• The National Archives and Records Administration (NARA)

(http://www.archives.gov/). An independent federal agency that preserves our nation’s

history and defines us as a people by overseeing the management of all federal records.

It includes the Federal Register, which has the official text of federal laws, presidential

documents, administrative notices and more.

• National Technical Information Service (NTIS) (http://www.ntis.gov/). NTIS is the

nation’s top resource for government reports and information.

• Office of Scientific & Technical Information (OSTI) (http://www.osti.gov/). OSTI

collects, preserves and disseminates DOE-sponsored research and development (R&D)

results that are the outcomes of R&D projects or other funded activities at DOE labs and

facilities nationwide and grantees at universities and other institutions. The information is

typically in the form of technical documents, conference papers, articles, multimedia and

software, collectively referred to as scientific and technical information (STI).

• Open Source Center (OSC) (https://www.opensource.gov/). The OSC, formerly

known as Foreign Broadcast Information Service (FBIS) is an electronic information

service that collects and translates current political, economic, technical and military

information from the media worldwide for the US government. Users must register and

establish an account.

• Science.Gov (http://www.science.gov/). Science.gov searches over 50 databases and

over 2,100 selected websites from 12 federal agencies, offering 200 million pages of

authoritative US government science information including research and development

results.

• Department of State (http://www.state.gov/). The Department of State site includes a

wealth of information on countries, regions, treaties, international issues, aid for

development, arms control and more.

• Thomas (http://thomas.loc.gov/). Library of Congress resource covering the legislative

branch, laws, treaties, bills, reports, etc.

• USA.gov (http://www.usa.gov/). The US government’s official web portal.

• USA.gov Data and Statistics (http://www.usa.gov/Topics/Reference-

Shelf/Data.shtml). Provides links to wide range of government sources of data and

statistics, domestic and international.

• The White House (http://www.whitehouse.gov/). Provides the latest official

presidential releases.

• World News Connection (WNC) (http://wnc.fedworld.gov/). Foreign news service

provided by the NTIS using material provided by the OSC. It is a subscription service

for use by personnel not eligible for an OSC account. It includes the portion of OSC

news/articles for which copyright can be cleared.

CHAPTER 4:

Step 2 (Research Your Topic)

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Other Magazine and News Indexes

Some indexes listed below require a paid subscription. Contact your local or base library for free

availability using their subscription.

• Access Science

(http://www.accessscience.com/). Provides on-line access to the

McGraw-Hill Encyclopedia of Science and Technology, including 7,100+ articles,

115,000 dictionary terms and hundreds of Research Updates—in all areas of science and

technology—updated daily, plus these great features: Over 2,000 in-depth biographies of

leading scientists through history; weekly updates on breakthroughs and discoveries in

the world of science and technology; resources to guide your research; and links to

websites for further research. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• Air Force Times

and related publications. Provides full-text access to Army Times,

Air Force Times, Navy Times and the Marine Corps Times and includes current issues

and archives. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

o Army Times

(http://www.armytimes.com/).

o Air Force Times

(http://www.airforcetimes.com/).

o Navy Times

(http://www.navytimes.com/).

o Marine Corps Times

(http://www.marinetimes.com/).

• Country Watch Country Review

(http://www.countrywatch.com/). Provides the

political, economic, corporate and environmental trends for each of the approximately

200 countries around the world. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• CQ Library, CQ Weekly

(http://library.cqpress.com/cqweekly/). Congressional

Quarterly’s magazine on government, commerce and politics.

• EBSCOhost® (http://search.ebscohost.com/). A web-based periodical index that

provides abstracts and indexing for over 4,800 scholarly journals covering the social

sciences, military science, humanities, education and more. Also included is the full text

for over 1,000 journals—with many dating back to 1990—and over 1,700 peer-reviewed

journals. Copyright requires a paid subscription.

• Lexis-Nexis Academic® (http://www.lexisnexis.com/). Provides access to a wide range

of full-text news, business info, legal cases, and world news about countries and research

about public figures. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• NewsBank

(http://infoweb.newsbank.com/). Provides news articles covering social,

economic, environmental, government, sports, health, science and military issues and

events from more than 500 US regional and national newspapers and wire services and

140 full-text general news, subject-specific and military magazines. Copyrighted

material requires a paid subscription.

• ProQuest® (http://search.proquest.com/login). Magazine articles from 8,000+

publications. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• STRATFOR

(http://www.stratfor.com/). Combines intelligence analysis and news

archives on various countries. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

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• Wiley Interscience® (http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/advanced/search). Provides the

full text of over 300 leading scientific, technical, medical and professional journals.

Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription required.

Graphics, Photos and Maps

Each military service home page has links to photos, videos, graphics, and/or artwork related to

that particular service. The DoD home page also has links to photos and videos. Most search

engines also have specialized searches for graphics, images and videos. Most special operators

work in the image/video searches as well. For instance, <f-16 site: af.mil> in the Google™

image search will give you F-16 images from only Air Force web pages. Similarly, <f-16

filetype: gif> will give you only .gif images, excluding .jpg and other file types. Combining the

operators <f-16 site: mil filetype: jpg> will give you only .jpg images from .mil web pages.

Look at additional features of specialized search engines. At this time Google™ Image search

offers you the choice of face, photo, clip art, or line drawing.

• AP Multimedia Archive (http://www.apimages.com/). An electronic library

containing the AP’s current photos from their 50 million-image print and negative

library, as well as charts, graphs, tables and maps from the AP’s graphics portfolio.

Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• defenseimagery.mil (http://DoDimagery.afis.osd.mil/). Contains official US Military

images, both still and motion, from around the world. Provides oversight for the Joint

Combat Camera Program. Individuals must register and establish an account.

• University Of Texas Map Database (http://www.lib.utexas.edu/maps/). The Perry-

Castaneda Library Map Collection, at the University of Texas, has more than 250,000

maps. Many are online, organized by region, historical period, theme, or current event.

Other Sources

Some indexes listed below require a paid subscription. Contact your local or base library for free

availability using their subscription.

• Britannica® Online (http://www.britannica.com/). A full-text encyclopedia that is

accessible via the Internet. It provides articles as well as related resources on the

Internet. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• Columbia International Affairs® Online (CIAO) (http://www.ciaonet.org/).

A web-based database designed to be the most comprehensive source for theory and

research in international affairs. It publishes a wide range of scholarship from 1991 on,

which includes working papers from university research institutes, occasional papers

from NGOs, foundation-funded research projects and proceedings from conferences.

Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• Firstsearch® (http://www.oclc.org/firstsearch/). An electronic information service that

is accessible over the Internet. This service provides access to over 70 databases on a

wide variety of local and global subjects. Copyrighted material requires a paid

subscription.

CHAPTER 4:

Step 2 (Research Your Topic)

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• Infotrac

(http://infotrac.galegroup.com). An electronic information service that is

accessible over the Internet, providing access to Cengage Learning databases. This

education related service may require a paid subscription, depending on your institution.

• Jane’s Online (http://www.janes.com/). Provides access to select Jane’s resources.

Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• ProQuest® Congressional Universe

(http://congressional.proquest.com/congressional). Provides access to a wealth of

congressional publications such as hearings, reports, bills, laws, regulations, and CIS

Legislative Histories. This site also allows you to locate specific information about

members and committees. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• PERISCOPE (http://www.militaryperiscope.com/). Provides open-source intelligence

on orders of battle, equipment inventories, and procurement plans and programs for 165

nations. It also provides technical descriptions and characteristics for nearly every major

weapon system and platform. Copyrighted material requires a paid subscription.

• RAND (http://www.rand.org/). The RAND Corporation is a nonprofit institution that

helps improve policy and decision making through research and analysis. Its website

includes reports on many military and security issues, as well as other issues of concern

to lawmakers and decision makers.

• REFDESK (http://www.refdesk.com/). REFDESK is a large compilation of news,

almanacs, encyclopedias, magazine articles, commentaries and other daily sampling of

US and worldwide information sources.

• First Things First (http://www.refdesk.com/first.html) is a list of newspapers, online

magazines and specialty news.

Copyrights

Bottom Line Up Front (BLUF): There are many misconceptions about copyrights, especially

with the ability to cut and paste or transfer whole files electronically. Remember, copyrights

protect the intellectual property of others; violating copyrights and passing the work off as your

original work is plagiarism—distributing copyrighted materials without permission is criminal.

Consider the satirical comment by Wilson Mizner, an American playwright from the late 1800s,

who once said, “Copy from one, it’s plagiarism; copy from many, it’s research.” Sorry, but

Wilson is wrong–it’s still plagiarism no matter how many times you copy material or paraphrase

it without proper citation or attribution. The Copyright Office (http://copyright.gov/) website

includes handouts and research guides on copyright law and practice. The following searches

give a wealth of tips and handouts on copyright and researching.

“copyright for researchers site:edu” or “copyright for researchers site:gov”

If you search for documents, images and other material using the site: gov or site: mil operators,

you’ll be most likely to find copyright unencumbered material. But you still need to verify the

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Social Media and Networks

There are many brand name social media sites along with personal or professional blogs and

discussion groups or networks that are increasingly the predominant form of information sharing.

Many times they offer you the chance to meet online with subject matter experts who have ideas

and facts to offer your research. Just remember to verify their identities and qualifications. In

addition, many of the social media sites are now searchable using search engines. But before

you venture out there too far, or set up your own social network, please do the following

searches and read some of the existing guides. Your safety and security could be at risk.

Internet safety site: gov; social networking safety site: gov

social media guidelines site: mil; preventing online identity theft site: gov

Most government and military websites now include links to their social media sites You need

to strike a careful balance between risk and communication openness. Many browsers now have

“privacy” or “stealth” modes, which allow you to limit your exposure to information mining by

sites you visit.

Other Help and Tips

• Web pages or sites vanishing. This frequently happens, which is why we suggest you

save web pages you paraphrase, quote from, or use for ideas.

• Google™ cache can be searched using the cache: URL tool, such as “cache: cia.gov”

• The Wayback Machine (http://www.archive.org/) has selected web pages after 1996.

• If any of the URLs in this chapter fail to work, just use the name of the site or document

as a search term in a search engine. Search engines are continually re-indexing the

Internet and therefore can usually find documents and pages when they are moved.

• If you want to be continually updated on a topic, try signing up for topic-specific alerts

and RSS feeds and other updating services available from many websites. Notices of

updates can be sent directly to your phone, computer, tablet, or other device.

• Search for tools relating to the “invisible web”–the portion of the Internet which search

engines can’t find. For example, a database that assembles results pages only after you

enter a specific search. Regular searches may find the link to the database, but you may

be able to examine the contents of the database only through using its interface directly.

SUMMARY: When you’re trying to inform or persuade others, you need to do some research—

there is no substitute for good research. Use the Internet, library, your office files, and your

coworkers to get the best information possible and be sure to critically evaluate your sources.

With good research, you will find more than you need. Carefully select what is important to

advance your argument and you will find that research is enjoyable and rewarding. Stay focused

on your purpose and you can stay on schedule.

CHAPTER 5:

Step 3 (Support Your Ideas)

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CHAPTER 5:

Step 3

(Support Your Ideas)

This chapter covers:

• The Logic of Arguments: Fundamentals

• Evidence: Proving Your Point

• Characteristics of Good Supporting Evidence

• Logical Errors: Flawed Arguments

• Arguments, Truth and Persuasion

Once you’ve researched your topic and collected information, you need to figure out how to use

what you’ve found to meet your communication goals. If you’re dealing with a controversial

question or problem, throwing facts at your audience won’t be enough—you’ll need to assemble

it into a logical argument that can stand up to critical attack. This chapter will give you some

helpful pointers on how to build an argument and support your ideas.

Logical arguments are instruments of power. They’re how you make things happen. It’s worth

the effort to understand some basics, even if some of this chapter makes your head hurt.

A moment’s thought would have shown him. But a moment is a long time and

thought is a painful process.

–A.E. Housman

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The Logic of Arguments: Fundamentals

When you present a solution to a problem or answer a controversial question, persuasion is part

of the assignment. There are different approaches to persuade members of your audience—you

can appeal to their emotions, their ability to reason or even your own credibility on the topic

being discussed. In the Air Force environment, your best approach to support your ideas and

persuade others is by building a solid logical argument.

Though the word “argument” is commonly used to describe a quarrel or disagreement, it also has

a positive meaning—it’s a series of statements intended to persuade others. In this chapter, when

we use the term logical argument, we’re referring to a coherent set of statements that provide a

position and support for that position based on information and facts, not just emotions.

This is important for two reasons. First, you build logical arguments every day: when you talk

to your team about duties; when you talk to your boss about your workload and schedules; and

when you sort out how best to accomplish the mission. If you build strong arguments, things are

more likely to work out the way you think they should. Second, others are aiming arguments at

you every day and many of these arguments fail logically. If you understand how arguments are

constructed and where they go wrong, you’re less likely to buy into a failed logic.

Elements of a Logical Argument

Different textbooks have different terms and approaches to describe logical arguments. This

chapter uses terminology found in The Craft of Research, by Booth, Comb and Williams.

Logical arguments contain four elements:

• a claim

• evidence that supports the claim

• warrants linking pieces of evidence to the claim

• qualifications that limit the claim

First we’ll describe each of these terms and then we’ll illustrate them in a real-life example of an

argument in the next section. The example will help clarify each point.

The Claim

Your claim is simply your position on an issue, your answer to a controversial question or your

recommendation for resolving a problem. In academic writing, a claim is also called a thesis.

Evidence That Supports the Claim

By definition, every argument has evidence intended to give reasons for your claim. Another

term for evidence is support (“support” and “evidence” are used interchangeably in this text).

The similarity of these terms is clear in their definitions:

Evidence (a noun) is the data by which proof or probability may be based or may be

admissible as testimony in a court of law.

Support, as a noun, is the information that substantiates a position; as a verb, support is

the act to furnish evidence for a position.

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If a piece of evidence is questionable, it may be attacked as a sub-claim. Then, you either have

to provide additional evidence to prove the sub-claim is true, or eliminate it from your argument.

Warrants That Link Evidence to the Claim

With every piece of evidence, there are often assumptions, either stated or unstated, that link the

evidence to the claim and explain why the evidence is relevant to the argument. These linking

statements or concepts are called warrants. Warrants are important because they can be

potential weaknesses in an argument.

Qualifications That Limit the Claim

Sometimes the argument will have qualifications—conditions that limit the claim. You can

think of a qualification as a statement you attach to the claim with a big IF statement. We often

notice these qualifications as we critically look at the evidence we have and realize its

limitations.

Elements of a Logical Argument: An Example

Let’s use a real life example of a logical argument to show how the different elements work

together. Suppose you’re responsible for selecting a guest speaker to teach topic XYZ at a PME

school. Ms. Jane Doe spoke last year and you’ve decided to invite her back. Your boss wants to

know your recommendation and your rationale. Guess what? You’ve just been asked to produce

a logical argument

CLAIM: We should invite Ms. Jane Doe to teach topic XYZ at this year’s class.

EVIDENCE, item #1: Ms. Doe has spent 26 years working with XYZ and is an expert in this

field.

WARRANT, item #1: Spending 26 years of working with XYZ makes her an expert. (Another

implied warrant is that we want an expert to teach topic XYZ.)

If someone wanted to attack this bit of evidence, he might ask you to prove the fact that she’s

spent 26 years in the field—let’s see a resume!

If someone wanted to attack the underlying warrant, he may argue that she isn’t really an

expert—maybe she’s been doing an entry-level job for 26 years.

But let’s suppose that Ms. Doe is indeed an expert in the field, and this is solid evidence.

EVIDENCE, item #2: Last year’s course directors all thought she did an excellent job.

WARRANT, item #2: These people know what they’re talking about.

If someone wanted to challenge this evidence, he might ask you to produce letters of

recommendation. How enthusiastic are the directors about the job she did?

If someone wanted to attack the underlying warrant, he might question the course directors’

judgment. Maybe they were new to the job and didn’t know much about the topic. Maybe

they were TDY during the presentation and were basing their recommendation on what they

heard from others.

In this case, let’s assume that the course directors are both credible and enthusiastic.

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EVIDENCE, item #3: Ms. Doe is a very dynamic lecturer.

WARRANT, item #3: It’s good to have a dynamic lecturer.

Recall that evidence you provide to support your claim can be attacked as a sub-claim … and

this last bit of evidence looks vulnerable. How do we know that Ms. Doe is a dynamic

lecturer? To back it up, you’d have to “support your support” on item #3 with something like

this:

SUBCLAIM: Ms. Doe is a very dynamic lecturer.

SUBCLAIM EVIDENCE #1: Students provided five times the amount of feedback than is

typical for a lecture.

SUBCLAIM WARRANT #1: Student interest is proportional to volume of feedback.

SUBCLAIM EVIDENCE #2: Ninety-two percent of feedback was very favorable and 8

percent was very unfavorable.

SUBCLAIM WARRANT #2: Polarized feedback implies a dynamic lecture.

Well, this additional information really does back up the fact that Ms. Doe is a dynamic lecturer,

but it also indicates her views are controversial—8 percent of the student population really didn’t

like her presentation. You may believe that your school’s goal is education and not to make

every student happy, but you might qualify your claim with the following “IF” statement:

QUALIFICATION:

Ms. Jane Doe should be invited back to teach topic XYZ

it is acceptable to have a controversial speaker at the school.

Evidence: Proving Your Point

As you see, individual pieces of evidence are used to build your argument. In this section, we

identify some common types of evidence as well as approaches to help explain your ideas to

your audience.

• A definition is a precise meaning or significance of a word or phrase. In an argument, it

can be helpful to establish a common frame of reference for important or ambiguous

words, so don’t underestimate the importance of definitions.

• An example is a specific instance chosen to represent a larger fact in order to clarify an

abstract idea or support a claim. Good examples must be appropriate, brief and attention

arresting. Quite often they are presented in groups of two or three for impact.

• Testimony uses the comments of recognized authorities to support your claim. These

comments can be direct quotations or paraphrases, but direct quotations tend to carry

more weight with listeners or readers. When using testimony as support, make sure the

individuals being quoted are both generally credible—no unknown relatives or convicted

felons, please—and knowledgeable in the field under discussion.

• Statistics provide a summary of data that allows your audience to better interpret

quantitative information. Statistics can be very persuasive and provide excellent support

if handled competently. Keep them simple and easy to read and understand. Also,

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remember to round off your statistics whenever possible and document the exact source

of your statistics.

The persuasive power of statistics means that you need to be particularly careful to use

them properly. Many people will put blind trust in numbers and fall prey to people or

papers that spout numbers or statistical proof. (Ironically, people who work with

numbers for a living are the most cautious about trusting someone else’s statistics!).

Always, always examine the basic assumption(s) on which the analysis rests. Some of

the most compelling statistical arguments turn out to be intricate sand castles built on a

foundation of shaky assumptions. The math may be technically correct, but the

assumptions can’t stand up to scrutiny.

In their book Writing Arguments, John Ramage, John Bean, and June Johnson define a fact as a

noncontroversial piece of data that can be confirmed by observation or by talking to communally

accepted authorities. The authors distinguish a fact from an inference, which is an interpretation

or explanation of the facts that may be reasonably doubted. They recommend that writers

distinguish facts from inferences and handle inferences as testimony. Definitions, testimony,

statistics and facts provide data that you can use to construct an argument. This next category—

explanation—can also be helpful in supporting your ideas.

• Explanation makes a point plain or understandable or gives the cause of some effect. It

can be used to clarify your position or provide additional evidence to help make your

case. The following three techniques can be used as part of an explanation:

• Analysis: The separation of a whole into smaller pieces for further study; clarifying a

complex issue by examining one piece at a time.

• Comparison and Contrast: Comparison and Contrast are birds of similar feather. Use

comparison to dramatize similarities between two objects or situations and contrast to

emphasize differences.

• Description: To tell about in detail, to paint a picture with words—typically more

personal and subjective than definition.

Characteristics of Good Supporting Evidence

There are two kinds of truth. There are real truths and there are made-up truths.

–Marion Barry

(As Mayor of Washington, D.C., after his arrest for drug use.)

Though different professions and academic fields have their own standards of what is “good”

evidence, there are some common characteristics to consider.

Trust

Is the information from an authoritative, trustworthy source? Will your audience trust this

source and should you? In the previous chapter we stressed the importance of being cautious

with Internet sites, but you should be wary of any source’s credibility. Also, remember that it’s

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better to refer back to original material than rely on someone else’s interpretation of existing

work since people and their research are often misquoted.

Accuracy

Is the information accurate and free from error? Check and recheck your facts—errors can

seriously damage your credibility. Critically evaluate your sources and if you’re uncertain about

your facts, be honest with your audience. You can increase your confidence in the accuracy of

your information by using multiple sources to confirm key facts.

Precision

Is your information appropriately precise? When we talk about “precision,” we mean the

information should be specified within appropriately narrow limits. The level of required

precision will vary with the topic being discussed. Describing regulations for uniform wear may

require a precision of fractions of an inch and telling someone that his operational specialty

badge should be in the middle of their shirt or within a meter of his belt buckle is not adequately

precise. On the other hand, when reporting on the designated mean point of impact for

munitions, a measurement in meters or feet would be an appropriate level of precision.

When talking about some subset of a group, explain how many or what percentage of the total

you’re talking about. If you find yourself constantly using qualifiers like “some, most, many,

almost, usually, frequently, rarely…” you probably need to find some convincing statistics to

help you make your case.

Relevance

Is your evidence relevant? Evidence can be authoritative, accurate and precise, yet still be totally

irrelevant. Don’t shove in interesting facts that have nothing to do with the claim; help the

reader understand the relevance of your material by explaining its significance. Explain charts,

graphs and figures and use transitions in your writing to “connect the dots” for the reader.

Sufficiency

Is your evidence sufficient to support your claim and representative of the whole situation or

group? If you are trying to form some conclusions about a situation or group, you need data that

represents the complete situation. For example, if you were trying to form conclusions about the

overall military population, you would want to gather evidence from all services, not just one

career field in one service. If you find that your evidence is either not representative or not

sufficient, you need to find more evidence, limit the claim to what you can prove or qualify your

claim. You may have to let go of evidence that doesn’t fit or data that is no longer current.

Logical Errors: Flawed Arguments

Many people would sooner die than think—in fact, they do so.

–Bertrand Russell

Some of you may have studied formal logic in school. These classes used a lot of complex

language and theory to describe what makes an argument “good” or “bad.” Unfortunately, many

CHAPTER 5:

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real-life arguments outside of math and engineering are more “squishy” … and sometimes it’s

hard to draw a diagram or write an equation to explain exactly what’s wrong.

Common errors in reasoning are called informal fallacies. They are called “informal” fallacies

because they’re harder to pin down than some of the “formal” errors in logic. Still, you see them

around you every day—especially in advertising, talk radio or political debates. Keep them out

of your staff work and learn to identify them in others.

The informal fallacies below have been grouped into categories that make sense to the editors,

but there’s no universally accepted approach to categorizing them. Also note that labeling

something as a fallacy requires some judgment—after all, many of these are “gray areas.”

Asserted Conclusion

An asserted conclusion is the practice of slipping in an assertion and passing it off as a fact.

There are two variations of asserted conclusions: circular reasoning and loaded questions.

Circular reasoning (also known as begging the question) involves rewording your claim

and trying to use it as evidence, usually with a lot of other “filler sentences” designed to

confuse the other person. This is popular in advertising where different versions of the claim

are repeated over and over again. If the advertisers have their way, you may not notice that

the “support” merely restates the claim using different words—a textbook case of circular

reasoning. After a while, it’s easy to forget there’s absolutely no support there at all.

CLAIM: “Hey guys! Drink Energy Drink X and you’ll be great at sports!”

SUPPORT:

• “Great athletes are alert and energized—Energy Drink X keeps you alert and gives

you energy to perform!”

• “You’ll have many good looking and physically fit friends!”

A Loaded question has an assertion embedded in it—it’s another form of an asserted

conclusion. One example of a loaded question is “Do you think John Smith is going to

improve his rude behavior?” The phrasing of the question itself implies that John has

behaved poorly in the past—regardless of how you answer the question. “When are we

going to stop sinking money on this expensive program?” has an embedded assumption: the

money we’ve spent to date hasn’t been effective.

Sometimes an arguer will assert a conclusion and then challenge someone else to disprove it.

The best defense is to ask him or her to prove their claim. “How do you know these programs

are effective?” puts the listener on the defensive. The proper response would be, “How do you

know the programs are not effective?” Those who assert should have the burden of proof.

2. Character Attack

The classic name for a character attack is the ad hominem fallacy (in Latin, Ad Hominem

means “to the man”). Character attacks are also sometimes called poisoning the well. A

character attack involves an assault on your opponent as an individual, instead of his or her

position. It’s very common in political advertisements, but you see it in the workplace as well.

Here are some examples:

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• “Mr. Smith is a tax and spend liberal who voted himself a pay raise last year.”

(Depending on the topic being discussed, this may be irrelevant to the core of the debate).

• “That guy is an egotistical windbag—what would he know about A-76 contract

transitions?” (He may know a lot—his personality is irrelevant to the issue).

3. Emotional Appeals

Emotional appeals try to persuade the heart, not the head. Though emotion plays a role in

persuasion, when emotion replaces reasoning in an argument, you’ve committed a foul. Often

arguers attempt to appeal to our emotions in an argument through biased language, vivid

language and stirring symbols. They may try to persuade us using “character” issues such as

glowing testimonials from popular but non-credible sources. Here are some examples of logical

fallacies in this area:

Emotional appeal (to force):

These arguments target the audience’s fear of punishment. What characterizes these examples as

fallacies is that they make no attempt to persuade using anything other than pressure.

• “Keep this quiet, or I’ll implicate you in my wrongdoing.”

• “Give me your lunch money, or I’ll give you a busted lip.”

Emotional appeal (to pity):

This is an argument that targets the audience’s compassion and concern for others. Though most

people would agree that ethics and values should be part of the decision-making process, an

appeal solely to emotion, even a positive one, can be dangerous and misguided.

• “You can’t give me a D on this paper—I’ll lose my tuition assistance!”

• “We’ve got to stop the warlords—look at the poor, starving people on the news!”

Emotional appeal (to popularity or tradition):

• Stirring Symbols: Using a powerful symbol or attractive label to build support.

o “I stand before our nation’s flag to announce my run for President….”

o “Good management principles demand we take this course of action.”

• Bandwagon Appeal: Using peer pressure to build support.

o “It must be right—everybody else thinks so.”

o “Buy the Ford Escort; it’s the world’s #1 best seller.”

o “Every good fighter pilot knows….”

• Precedent as sole support: Using custom as the only justification for a decision.

o “It must be right—we’ve always done it that way.”

o “The Royal Air Force has found the procedure very useful and we should try it.”

o “The last three commanders supported this policy and that’s good enough for me.”

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4. False Authority

False authority is a fallacy tied to accepting facts based on the opinion of an unqualified

authority. The Air Force is chock-full of people who, because of their position or authority in

one field, are quoted on subjects in other fields for which they have limited or no expertise.

Don’t be swayed (or try to sway someone else).

A false authority variant is called the primacy-of-print fallacy, where facts are believed because

they are published in a book, periodical or on a website. Be as skeptical and thoughtfully critical

of the printed word as you are of the spoken word.

5. False cause

False cause (also known as the Post Hoc fallacy) occurs when you assume one event causes a

second event merely because it precedes the second event. Many people observe that Event B

occurred after Event A and conclude that A caused B. This is not necessarily true—maybe a

third factor, Event C, caused both A and B. Consider the following example:

Event A = At Base X, “Retreat” plays over the intercom at 1635 each day.

Event B = At Base X, outbound traffic increases at the gate at 1640 each day.

There is a statistical correlation between these two events: if Event A happens, Event B is more

likely to happen and vice versa. Does that mean A causes B? Not necessarily—possibly a third

event may “cause” both A and B:

Event C = At Base X the official duty day ends at 1630 for much of the workforce.

6. Single Cause

A single cause fallacy occurs when you assume there is a single cause for an outcome, when in

fact multiple causes exist.

Let’s consider a real-life example of a single cause fallacy. Suppose you’re very physically fit,

and in a few months you’ll take a fitness test. You can’t run due to an injury so you are required

to walk a certain distance while having your heart rate measured. You’ve set a goal to score in

the top 10 percent for your age group—an “excellent” rating. You know that a disciplined

exercise program will cause you to improve your score, but is it this simple?

Event A = disciplined, intense exercise program CAUSES

Event B = excellent score on the fitness test

People who’ve had trouble with similar fitness tests would be quick to point out that cause and

effect may be a little more complicated in this case:

Event A = disciplined, intense exercise program;

Event B = genetically low resting heart rate;

Event C = no caffeine or nervousness about the test; CAUSES

Event D = excellent score on the fitness test

On the other hand, people who have the genetically low heart rate and nerves of steel may think

an excellent rating has a single cause because they’ve never had to deal with the other ones.

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7. Faulty Analogy

The faulty analogy is very common. Though we often make analogies to make a point,

sometimes they go astray—there’s something about the comparison that isn’t relevant. A faulty

analogy implies that because two things are alike in one way, they are alike in all the ways that

matter. It can be thought of as one example of a non sequitur fallacy (see item 11) such as in

this example:

“Leading a coalition is just like leading a squadron.”

Well, not exactly. Leadership is required in both situations, but leading a coalition requires

technical expertise as well as the ability to work with people from other services and countries; it

requires great communication skills, tact, and diplomacy. Leading an Air Force squadron

requires a high level of technical proficiency but this does not ensure success leading a coalition.

8. Faulty Dilemma

A faulty dilemma implies there is no middle ground between two options. Typically one option

is what the speaker prefers and the other option is clearly unacceptable, such as in this example:

“Spend one hour a day reading The Tongue and Quill to improve your writing skills …

or remain ignorant of writing standards. It’s your choice.”

Clearly this is a faulty dilemma—it falsely suggests you only have two choices, when you really

have many options. Maybe you can read The Tongue and Quill once a week or once a month.

Maybe you’ll find some other way to improve your writing skills—take a class, find a grammar

website, get feedback from your boss, etc. Though sometimes life really does give us an “either-

or” choice, in most cases we find a considerable range of options between two positions.

9. Hasty Generalization

A hasty generalization results when we “jump to conclusions” without enough evidence. A few

examples used as proof may not represent the whole.

“I asked three student pilots what they thought of the program and it’s obvious that

Undergraduate Pilot Training needs an overhaul.”

One of the challenges with this fallacy is it’s hard to determine how much evidence is “enough”

to form a reasonable conclusion. The rules will vary with the situation; more evidence is needed

to form a conclusion if the stakes are high. The Food and Drug Administration may require a

great deal of evidence before deciding a drug is safe for human use, while SSgt Snuffy may

require very little evidence before forming a generalized conclusion about which candy bars

should be sold at the snack bar.

10. Non sequitur

Non sequitur is Latin for “it does not follow” and is the generic term for a conclusion that does

not necessarily follow from the facts presented. The facts may not be relevant, or there may be

some sort of illogical leap made. Several fallacies, such as hasty generalization and faulty

analogy, can be thought of as different types of non sequitur. For example, “John Doe will make

a great squadron commander because he is an expert in his career field.” This is a non sequitur

error because it implies strong technical skills equate to the skills needed to command. A similar

non sequitur argument assumes athletic prowess indicates strong leadership skills.

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Step 3 (Support Your Ideas)

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11. Slippery Slope

The slippery slope implies that if we take one small step in an unpleasant or dangerous

direction, we’ll have to go all the way—like slipping down a hill. Here’s an example from

Writing Arguments by Ramage, Bean and Johnson: “We don’t dare send weapons to Country X.

If we do so, next we will send in military advisors, then a Special Forces battalion and then large

numbers of troops. Finally, we will be in an all-out war.” Though not every slippery slope

argument is false, in some cases we can identify lines that we will not cross. In general, it is best

to evaluate each argument on its merits using a foundation of agreed-upon principles.

12. Red Herring

Red herring fallacies occur when an arguer deliberately brings up irrelevant information to get

the audience off track. The origins of the “red herring” name are debatable, but the central idea

is to divert attention from the topic with content that has no bearing on the outcome.

13. Stacked Evidence

Stacked evidence is the tendency to withhold facts or manipulate support so that the evidence

points in only one direction. This happens when you gather only the data or opinions that

support your position. This may be done deliberately or may occur due to unconscious bias or

carelessness. We may not see counterarguments or alternative interpretations of the facts

because of our firm belief in our own position, or we just stop gathering information once we

we’ve found enough support to make our case. Even if you decide to push for your favorite

interpretation of the data, never stack evidence by misrepresenting or manipulating the basic

information. If you decide that you don’t want to discuss the opposing viewpoint, you should at

least be aware of it, so you can prepare a counterpunch if needed.

14. Straw Man

Straw man is a fallacy where you attack a weaker, grossly simplified version of the opponent’s

argument rather than directly addressing the argument presented. In effect, you are attacking a

“straw man”—the argument that you wished your opponent made, not the one he actually did.

The straw man fallacy is popular in political campaigns. For example, suppose a candidate

believed that a major goal of prisons should be rehabilitation, not just punishment. An opponent

could exploit that with a straw man attack: “My opponent coddles convicted felons and wants to

make life easier behind bars than on the street. Prison should be a deterrent, not a reward for

bad behavior!”

This list of fallacies captures most of the common errors we hear and see daily. Our challenge is

to sharpen our professional senses so we can quickly sniff out the rational from the ridiculous

and avoid adding to the epidemic of poor reasoning and weak support we encounter around us.

We’ve all had experience with using logical arguments to persuade someone else. In the middle

of such a discussion, you may have asked yourself, “What’s my goal—to persuade the other guy

and make my case; or to find out the truth and the best answer to the problem?” (This usually

comes up when your opponent comes up with a valid point you hadn’t considered before.) Ever

since the ancient Greeks were walking around in togas, people have struggled with this issue.

The next section introduces this tension between truth and persuasion so that you are aware of it

in both your arguments and those of others.

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Arguments, Truth and Persuasion

We believe that argument is a matter not of fist banging or of win-lose debate but

of finding, through a process of rational inquiry, the best solution of a problem.

–John D. Ramage, John C. Bean, and June Johnson

There will always be reasons to use argument as a tool of persuasion—you want your

subordinate to win that award, you really need additional funding for your branch and you want

your spouse to visit his or her in-laws over the Thanksgiving weekend.

Sometimes in the heat of verbal battle, it’s tempting to focus on persuasion and forget about

truth. Don’t do it. “Integrity First” is one of our Air Force Core Values and you have to look at

yourself in the mirror every morning. You don’t have to be a doormat, but if you find out about

some new information that may change your position, keep an open mind. In most situations,

you don’t only want your way, you want the best way. Besides, if you pull a fast one and get

your way through deception, you’ve won a battle, but your credibility is shot and you’ve crippled

yourself for future skirmishes.

Other ways to build credibility with your audience include being knowledgeable and fair.

Research your topic carefully and take the time to get the facts right. Don’t bluff if you don’t

have an answer, or mislead others about the strength of your support. Consider your audience’s

values and assumptions when selecting evidence. Make sure you get the easy things right—the

spelling of names, significant dates and other details like grammar and punctuation.

Demonstrate goodwill in your writing tone—don’t be condescending or act superior. If you

make a mistake, acknowledge it and move on. Credibility takes a long time to build, but it is

invaluable when trying to support your ideas and persuade others.

SUMMARY: In this chapter we covered several topics that should help you support your ideas.

We defined a logical argument as a set of statements designed to persuade others. Logical

arguments have four components:

1. a claim—your position on a controversial topic;

2. evidence that supports your claim;

3. warrants that identify why the evidence is relevant; and

4. qualifications that limit the claim.

Your argument is built upon evidence and it should be authoritative, accurate, precise, relevant

and adequate to support your claim. As you build or listen to logical arguments, watch out for

logical fallacies—common mistakes many people make when building an argument. Arguments

are everywhere. To write and speak persuasively, it helps to understand how arguments are

constructed and where they go wrong. These insights will be helpful as you start to organize and

outline your thoughts—the next step of the process.

CHAPTER 6:

Step 4 (Organize and Outline)

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CHAPTER 6:

Step 4

(Organize and Outline)

This chapter covers:

• Organizing: Finalizing Your Purpose Statement and Bottom Line

• The Outline: Why Do I Need One?

• Outlining the Body: Pick a Pattern

After completing the first three steps of the Seven Steps to Effective Communication you are

well on your way to an outstanding spoken or written product. Now it’s time to talk about

organizing and outlining, the final step in prewriting. A detailed outline helps you arrange your

material logically, see relationships between ideas, and serves as a reference point to keep you on

target as you write your draft. Think of your outline as the blueprint for your communication

product, and realize that the time you spend preparing it will pay off when you start writing

sentences and paragraphs.

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Organizing: Finalizing Your Purpose Statement and Bottom Line

Why are we talking about a purpose statement again? Didn’t we already determine our “bottom

line” back in Step 1? Or did we? Sometimes information uncovered during the research process

(Step 2) may point you in an unexpected direction. So do you tweak the data to match your

original purpose? No! Now is the time to adjust the vector of your purpose statement to

something you can reasonably support and live with.

A thesis statement is a specialized form of purpose statement used in academic or

persuasive writing.

The thesis statement captures the author’s point of view on a controversial topic,

which he or she defends throughout the paper. A thesis statement is usually

finalized after the research process.

You’re less likely to go astray during the outlining process if you write down your purpose

statement and refer to it often. Every main point and supporting idea in your outline should

support that purpose statement—irrelevant facts or opinions should be eliminated. Discipline at

this stage will save pain later.

Organizing: get your bottom line up front (most of the time). In nearly every

communication situation, you need to state your bottom line early in the message. In a direct or

deductive approach, state your position, main point or purpose up front, then go into the details

that support your main point. When you take a direct approach to communication, your audience

is better prepared to digest the details of the message and logically make the connections in its

own mind.

In the future, authors will take a long time to get to the point. That way the book

looks thicker.

–Scott Adams

(The Dilbert Future: Thriving on Stupidity in the 21st Century)

There is an exception to every rule, and you might want to be less direct when trying to persuade

a hostile audience. In such a situation, if you state your bottom line up front, you risk turning

them off before you build your argument—regardless of how well it is supported. In this case

you might consider using an indirect or inductive approach: you may present your support and

end with your bottom line. Sometimes this successfully “softens the blow” and gives your

audience time to warm up to your views.

In the inductive approach, you still need an introduction, but it would be less direct. Here’s an

example of two purpose statements:

Direct: Women should be allowed in combat because….

Indirect: The issue of women in combat has been hotly debated and both sides have

valid points….

CHAPTER 6:

Step 4 (Organize and Outline)

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Use the inductive approach with caution; it’s an advanced technique and difficult to execute

without confusing your audience. In an academic setting, seek your instructor’s advice before

applying this method to your assignments.

The Outline: Why Do I Need One?

To some people, preparing an outline looks like a chore. Though an outline does take some

effort, it’s a time-saver, not a time-waster: an outline organizes your main points and supporting

ideas in a logical order. It allows you to see the flow of your ideas on paper without having to

write out complete sentences and paragraphs. If the ideas don’t fit together or flow naturally,

you can rearrange them without a lot of effort. Like the blueprint of a house, an outline makes

the “construction process” efficient and effective—and results in a better quality product.

Does all writing require a detailed outline with several layers of detail? No. If you plan to write

a short letter, message or report, a list of main points may be all you need. For longer papers, Air

Force publications, reports, staff studies, etc., you’ll find a detailed outline is usually an

indispensable aid. The outline then serves as the framework to write well-organized instructions,

reports, background or position papers, letters and memorandums.

Outlining Structure: Three Parts

Chapter 7 describes how most writing and speaking is organized into three parts: an

introduction, a body and a conclusion. Most of the work in developing an outline involves

organizing the body of your communication, but if you are building a detailed outline on a

lengthy written product, you should probably include the introduction and conclusion in the

outline. Skilled communicators writing short, informal assignments may just outline the body

and work out the introduction and conclusion during the drafting process.

Outlining Formats: Headings and Structure Used in Formal Outlines

Though most outlines you produce will never be seen by anyone else, the logic you develop in an

outline will show through in your communications—written an oral. You might also be asked to

produce a formal outline for “public consumption” in some cases, such as these scenarios:

• Your boss wants to review what you plan to cover before you start drafting.

• You’re organizing the efforts of multiple writers who must work together.

In these situations, it’s helpful to have a consistent approach to outlining your project. A recent

Internet search for outline formats yielded 3.6 million results; however, this handbook embraces

only a few. Be consistent once you pick an approach and do your homework to find out if there

is a preferred standard for your project.

 Tip: Turn off the automatic format function of your word processor. Many format

headaches can be stopped before they start by disabling the automatic format function.

Outlining: The Cardinal Rule

The cardinal rule of outlining: any topic that is divided must have at least two parts. Every “1”

must have a “2” (and so forth) for every level. Some official publications violate this rule but

this does not mean the standard has changed, only that the author did not follow the rule, either

by direction or in error.

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The Classic Outline Format

The first option for an outline format is to use the classic outline format. The classic outline

format uses Arabic numerals and the lower-case Latin alphabet characters in an alternating

pattern to identify the different levels of the outline.

THE CLASSIC OUTLINE FORMAT

1. Level 1. Classic outline levels are formatted as shown below. Each paragraph is identified

with a number or letter element followed by two spaces preceding the content of the paragraph.

a. Level 2. [5 spaces precede “a.” using Times New Roman (TNR) 12 point font]

(1) Level 3. [10 spaces precede “(1)” using TNR 12]

(a) Level 4. [16 spaces precede “(a)” using TNR 12]

1 Level 5. [22 spaces precede “1” using TNR 12]

a Level 6. [26 spaces precede “a” using TNR 12]

[1] Level 7. [30 spaces precede “[1]” using TNR 12]

[2] Level 7. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

b Level 6. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

2 Level 5. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

(b) Level 4. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

(2) Level 3. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

b. Level 2. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

2. Paragraphs are numbered by alternating Arabic numerals with characters from the Latin

alphabet, along with a period, parenthesis, underline or bracket to identify each paragraph.

a. Each level is indented so that the paragraph number or letter is aligned under the first

character in the preceding paragraph. Using Times New Roman 12 point font the spaces

preceding each level to create this example are shown in [grey brackets]; however, if the font

style or point size changes, the number of spaces will change due to the proportional spacing

function of word processing software. Regardless of the font style or point size, maintaining

the alignment of the paragraph number or letter of subordinate paragraphs with the first

character of the preceding level is the key.

b. The text wraps all the way to left margin for all levels.

c. Use bold font for main points or headings, as desired.

3. You can organize and subdivide in any number of ways (see “Outlining the Body: Pick a

Pattern” latter in this chapter).

a. Some sections may be more detailed than others resulting in some levels that will be

divided while others will not, but remember, the cardinal rule of outlining applies when you do

divide: any topic or outline level that is divided must have at least two parts..

b. Most letters and memorandums use no more than three levels and AU-1, the Air University

Style and Author Guide, recommends no more than three levels for most written work.

c. Technical works may require more than three levels to maintain clarity and organization.

4. The Classic Outline Format is the standard format commonly used by senior Air Force

executive staffs (directors of staff, secretaries, executive officers, command chiefs, etc.) and is

the format used in official memorandum examples later in this handbook.

CHAPTER 6:

Step 4 (Organize and Outline)

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The Numbered Outline Format

The numbered outline is directed by Air Force Instruction (AFI) 33-360, Publications and

Forms Management, for use in Air Force instructions. This format numbers every paragraph,

indents each level one-quarter inch from the previous level, and wraps the text to align under the

paragraph number. See AFI 33-360, paragraph 6.5.10.1, “Paragraph Numbering,” for further

details. The numbered outline format presented here is the final product format for AFIs; see

AFI 33-360 for guidance on the format for drafting instructions.

NUMBERED OUTLINE FORMAT (Reference AFI 33-360, paragraph 6.5.10.1.)

Chapter 1

1.1. Section 1. [Tip: Each item at a specific level in an outline should begin at the same level

of indentation from the left margin (i.e., paragraphs 1.1. and 1.2. have the same indentation.]

1.1.1. First subheading to paragraph 1.1 [Tip: For each level of detail the paragraph

numbers are indented one-quarter inch.]

1.1.2. Second subheading to paragraph 1.1. [Tip: Narrative text at every level should wrap

as in this example—indented from the left to be aligned under the paragraph number.]

1.1.2.1. First subheading to paragraph 1.1.2. [Tip: Air Force Instructions frequently

have levels of detail beyond this level. If possible, avoid too many levels of detail as the

paragraph numbers becomes very long and the effectiveness of the system is degraded.]

1.1.2.2. Second subheading to paragraph 1.1.2. [Tip: Organize content to follow the

cardinal rule of outlining: any topic that is divided must have at least two parts.

Never create a Part 1 without a Part 2, a Section A without a Section B, a Paragraph 1.1.1

without a Paragraph 1.1.2.

1.1.3. Third subheading to paragraph 1.1.

1.2. Section 2 of Chapter 1. [and so forth, as above.]

Chapter 2

2.1. Section 1 of Chapter 2.

2.1.1. First subheading to paragraph 2.1.

2.1.1.1. First subheading to paragraph 2.1.1

2.1.1.2. Second subheading to paragraph 2.1.1.

2.1.2. Second subheading to paragraph 2.1

2.2. Section 2 of Chapter 2. [and so forth, as above.]

The Modern Outline Format

The modern outline format is commonly used in Air Force PME courses. The modern outline

is based on the The Chicago Manual of Style (16th Edition, pages 347-348). The modern outline

uses upper- and lower-case Roman numerals as well as upper- and lower-case Latin alphabet and

Arabic numbers. Remember to turn off the auto format function of your word processor when

creating an outline.

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MODERN OUTLINE FORMAT (Based on The Chicago Manual of Style)

I. Level 1. [1 space precedes “I” using TNR 12 to maintain alignment with paragraph “II.”

For further information, see paragraph “i)”]

A. Level 2. [5 spaces precede “A.” using Times New Roman (TNR) 12 point font]

1. Level 3. [11 spaces precede “1.” using TNR 12]

a) Level 4. [16 spaces precede “a)” using TNR 12]

(1) Level 5. [21 spaces precede “(1)” using TNR 12]

(a) Level 6. Levels are numbered by alternating Arabic numerals with

characters from the Latin alphabet, along with a period, parentheses, or brackets to uniquely

identify each level [27 spaces precede “(a)” using TNR 12]

i) Level 7. This is the final outline level of detail available. The Roman

numerals are right-aligned (the numerals extend to the left). Right-alignment can be difficult

to format and maintain paragraph alignment, especially as the numeral increases; hence, lower-

case Roman numerals are reserved for the level least likely to be used. (The same difficulty

with right alignment of upper-case Roman numerals exists at Level 1. Often, the Level 1

Roman numerals are reserved for sections or chapters and Level 7 is not used. Some outlines

omit all Roman numerals, using Levels 2 through 6 as Levels 1 through 5. [34 spaces]

ii) Each level is indented so that the paragraph number or letter is aligned

under the first character in the preceding paragraph. Using Times New Roman 12 point font

the spaces preceding each level to create this example are shown in [grey brackets]; however,

if the font style or point size changes, the number of spaces will change due to the proportional

spacing function of word processing software (the differences in this example compared to the

Classic Outline example are due to differences in paragraph numbers, letters, and the number

of parentheses or brackets). Regardless of the font style or point size, maintaining the

alignment of the paragraph number or letter of subordinate paragraphs with the first

character of the preceding level is the key. [33 spaces]

iii) Use bold font for main points or headings, as desired. [33 spaces]

iv) The Chicago Manual of Style suggests that papers not needing seven

levels of detail omit Level 1 (upper-case Roman numerals) and Level 2 (upper-case Latin

alphabet) and start with the Arabic numerals of Level 3 (1, 2, 3,…). [33 spaces]

(b) Level 6. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

(2) Level 5. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

b. Level 4. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

2. Level 3. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

B. Level 2. Second item required by the cardinal rule of outlining.

II. You can organize and subdivide in any number of ways (see “Outlining the Body: Pick a

Pattern” latter in this chapter).

A. Some sections may be more detailed than others resulting in some levels that will be

divided while others will not, but remember, the cardinal rule of outlining applies when you do

divide: Any topic or outline level that is divided must have at least two parts.

B. Most Air Force letters and memorandums use three levels and the Air University Style

and Author Guide recommends no more than three levels for most short documents.

C. Technical or lengthy documents may require more than three levels to maintain clarity

and organization.

CHAPTER 6:

Step 4 (Organize and Outline)

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 Tip: Regardless of which outline format you use, remember that the primary purpose

of an outline is to arrange your thoughts into main points and subordinate ideas. The

bottom line is that outlining will help you organize content for greater clarity and

improved communication. Use the format that helps you achieve better communication.

Outlining the Body: Pick a Pattern

Your next step is to select a pattern that enables you and your readers to move systematically and

logically through your ideas from a beginning to a conclusion. Some of the most common

organizational patterns are listed below. Your purpose, the needs of your audience and the

nature of your material will influence your choice of pattern.

1. Topical or Classification Pattern

Use this format to present groups of ideas, objects or events by categories. This is a commonly

used pattern to present general statements followed by numbered listings of subtopics to support,

explain or expand the statements. A topical pattern usually follows some logical order that

reflects the nature of the material and the purpose of the communication. For example, if you are

giving a briefing on helicopters, you might separate them into light, medium and heavy lift

capabilities and briefly describe the weight limits for each category. You could begin with the

lightest capability and move to the heaviest or begin with the heaviest and move to the lightest.

 Tip: To help your readers absorb complex or unfamiliar material, consider

organizing your material to move from the most familiar to the unfamiliar or from the

simplest category to the most complex. When using this pattern, experiment to find the

arrangement that will be most comfortable for your audience.

2. Comparison and Contrast Pattern

Use this style when you need to discuss similarities and/or differences between topics, concepts

or ideas. When you are describing similarities and differences, it often helps the reader to see a

point-by-point comparison of the two items. For example, if you were writing a document that

compares and contrasts certain characteristics of the F-22 and the F-16, you might go item by

item, discussing similarities and differences between the two as you go.

3. Chronological Pattern

When you use this pattern, you discuss events, problems or processes in the sequence of time in

which they take place or should take place (past to present or present to future). This pattern is

commonly used in writing histories, tracing the evolution of processes, recording problem

conditions, and documenting situations that evolve over time. This approach is also used in

official biographies, which are written in chronological order because they serve as a history of

the member’s professional career.

This pattern is simple to use, but judgment is required when deciding what events to leave in and

what events to leave out. For example, if you were preparing a short biography to introduce a

distinguished guest speaker, you may decide to emphasize experiences that demonstrate his

subject matter expertise and leave out other important but less relevant details. When unsure

what to include, think back to your purpose and audience.

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 Tip: You may want to consider a chronological approach to your topic when it is

known to be controversial. Many writers and speakers will announce, “First let’s take a

look at the history of the problem.” This starts the sender and audience out on neutral

ground instead of just launching into the issue at hand. This is a type of inductive

approach, and again, should be used with caution.

4. Sequential Pattern

The sequential or step-by-step approach is similar to the chronological pattern. Use this

approach to describe a sequence of steps necessary to complete a technical procedure or process.

Usually the timing of steps is not as important as the specific order in which they are performed.

The outline on the first page of this chapter (“Seven Steps to Effective Communication”) is an

example of a sequential approach. The sequential approach is often used in manuals and other

instruction books. For example, a Security Forces noncommissioned officer (NCO) in charge of

small arms training might use this pattern when rewriting the teaching manual on how to safely

inspect, load, fire, disassemble and clean weapons. Since safety is paramount, the process must

be written in a precise, stepwise fashion to ensure that nothing is overlooked.

 Tip: When describing a procedure, explain the importance of sequence so your

audience is mentally prepared to pay close attention to the order, not just the content, of

the information.

5. Spatial or Geographical Pattern

When using this pattern, you’ll start at some point in space and proceed in sequence to other

points. The pattern is based on a directional strategy—north to south, east to west, clockwise or

counterclockwise, bottom to top, above and below, etc. Let’s say you are a weather officer

briefing pilots about current and anticipated conditions in the geographic region where they will

be flying a mission. You would most likely describe conditions in reference to the terrain and

describe weather systems that will affect their mission on a map.

 Tip: Make sure to use appropriate transitions to indicate spatial relationships: to the

left, farther to the left, still farthermost to the left; adjacent to, a short distance away, etc.

These signal the flow of the communication; if missing, your audience is easily confused.

6. Problem and Solution Pattern

You can use this pattern to identify and describe a problem and one or more possible solutions,

or an issue and possible techniques for resolving the issue. Discuss all facets of the problem—its

origin, its characteristics and its impact. When describing the proposed solution, include enough

support to convince your readers the solution is practical and cost effective. After presenting

your solution, you may want to identify immediate actions required to implement the solution.

The problem and solution pattern may be used in several variations:

• One Solution: Discuss the problem and follow with the single, most logical solution.

• Multiple Solutions: Discuss the problem, several possible solutions, the effects of each

and your recommendation.

• Multiple Solutions, Pro-Con: This popular format includes a discussion of the

advantages (“Pros”) and disadvantages (“Cons”) of each solution.

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Step 4 (Organize and Outline)

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Remember that a problem-solution pattern is not a format for a personal attack on an adversary;

it’s simply a systematic approach to use in persuading people either to accept your ideas or to

modify their own ideas. Note that this example uses the same paragraph headings (purpose,

background, discussion, views of others and recommendation) as used in the electronic staff

summary sheet (eSSS) discussed later in this handbook.

Problem and Solution Example: The Staff Study

The Staff Study format described in chapter 17 is a classic example of a problem and

solution pattern. Within this format, you can present several possible solutions or just the

one you recommend. A staff study with three options might have an outline that looks

like this:

1. PURPOSE: (Problem)

2. BACKGROUND: (Factors bearing on the problem)

a. Facts

b. Assumptions

c. Evaluation criteria for solutions

3. DISCUSSION: (Possible solutions and/or major factors or contentious points)

a. Option 1: pros and cons

b. Option 2: pros and cons

c. Option 3: pros and cons

4. VIEWS OF OTHERS: (Consider the views of others so that the package creates buy-

in from stakeholders and presents a complete analysis to the decision maker.)

5. RECOMMENDATION: (Clearly state in a single sentence what action you

recommend to the approving official. Though you can list your options in any order,

skilled writers often “save the best for last” and put their recommended option last on the

list to help readability.)

7. Reasoning or Logic Pattern

In this pattern, you state an opinion and then make your case by providing support for your

position. This is the classic “logical argument” described in chapter 5. This approach works

well when your goal is more than just discussion of problems and possible solutions. Use this

pattern when your mission is to present research that will lead your audience down the path to

your point of view!

 Tip: Remember your audience analysis? If members of your audience are hostile to

your position, try to look at this issue through their eyes. Start out with the support they

are most likely to accept, and then move into the less popular issues that support your

main point.

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8. Cause and Effect

You can use this pattern to show how one or more ideas, actions or conditions lead to other

ideas, actions or conditions. Two variations of this pattern are possible: (1) begin with the

effect, then identify the causes; or (2) begin with the causes, then identify the effects. The

technique you use depends on the context of your discussion.

Causes, Effects, and Faulty Logic

Be careful to avoid faulty logic traps when writing about cause and effect. You’re

guilty of a false cause fallacy when you assume one event causes a second event

merely because it precedes the second event. You’re guilty of a single cause fallacy

when you assume only one factor caused an outcome, when in fact there are

multiple causes. For more details on fallacies, refer back to chapter 5.

Sometimes an effect-to-cause approach is used when your purpose is to identify WHY

something happened. When might you use this approach? Let’s say you are the president of the

Safety Investigation Board following a fatal aircraft mishap (the effect). Your report might begin

by describing the mishap itself, and then explain the factors that led up to the mishap and

conclude with your determination of one or more causes for the effect.

Sometimes a cause-to-effect pattern is used when your purpose is to explain HOW current

actions or conditions (causes) may produce future consequences (effects). For example,

someone might use this pattern to present how a series of causes—larger automobiles, reduced

financial incentives for energy conservation and reduced research funding for alternative energy

technologies—might result in an undesirable effect—a US shortage of fossil fuels.

SUMMARY: A well-planned outline can ease the pain of writing your first draft. Remember,

building a house is much easier with a blueprint! This invaluable tool will help you remain

focused on your purpose statement and help ensure your support is organized, relevant and

tailored to your mission and audience. The outline will also help in the editing process. Take a

break after working on your outline and start fresh before you begin your draft. Good luck!

PART III:

Writing With Focus

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PART III:

WRITING WITH FOCUS

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Prewriting Process Summary: Steps 1-4

Before starting your draft, you should know…

Step 1. Analyze Purpose and Audience.

• Your purpose: to direct, inform, persuade or inspire.

• Your purpose statement: one sentence that captures your bottom line.

• Your communication format: Point paper? Staff study? Academic essay?

• Your audience: experience, education, attitudes about topic, etc.

• Your unit’s position: Could you create problems for others? Should you

coordinate this?

• The appropriate tone will depend on purpose and audience: usually polite, personal,

positive and inclusive; often informal and direct.

Step 2. Research Your Topic. Relevant information from boss, coworkers, office files,

Internet and the library.

Step 3. Support your Ideas.

• How to use relevant information to support your ideas and meet your purpose.

• How to “build a case” (a logical argument) for your position, if needed.

• How to use facts, definitions, statistics and testimony as evidence for your position.

• How to avoid mistakes in your logic and notice problems with your evidence.

Step 4. Organize and Outline.

• Your chosen organizational pattern (topical, chronological, problem and solution, etc.).

• Your outline, which graphically shows the flow of your main points.

CHAPTER 7:

Step 5 (Draft)

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CHAPTER 7:

Step 5

(Draft)

This chapter covers:

•

Drafting: Basic Philosophy

•

Drafting Effective Paragraphs

•

Drafting Effective Sentences

•

Overcoming Writer’s Block

After completing the prewriting process, you’ve got what you need to produce a first-rate

communication product. Congratulations! You’re ready to write your first draft! In this chapter

we’ll take a “top-down” approach to writing a draft. We’ll start with the big picture: a three-part

structure consisting of the introduction, the body and the conclusion. Next, we’ll describe how

to write effective paragraphs within the body. Finally, we’ll dig down deeper into the sentences,

phrases and words that make up the paragraphs of your draft.

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Drafting: Basic Philosophy

Keep a few things in mind as you start the drafting process. A draft is not the finished product,

and each sentence does not have to be polished and perfect. Your focus should be to get your

ideas on paper. Don’t obsess about grammar, punctuation, spelling and word choice at this

point—that comes later. You don’t have to fix every mistake as you see it—you can catch these

during the editing process.

It’s helpful to keep an eye on your outline when drafting your masterpiece, especially when

you’re writing something longer than a page or two. By periodically checking your outline, you

are less likely to lose focus and include irrelevant information.

Have you ever sat down to start your first draft and found yourself just staring at the blank

computer screen or paper? If you suffer from writer’s block, we’ll cover strategies for

overcoming this fairly common problem at the end of this chapter.

Three Part Structure: An Introduction, Body and Conclusion

What is your draft going to look like? Is it going to be one huge paragraph? In most cases,

you’ll organize your draft in a three-part structure—introduction, body and conclusion.

•

The introduction must capture your audience’s attention, establish rapport and announce

your purpose.

•

The body must be an effective sequence of ideas that flows logically in a series of

paragraphs.

•

The conclusion must summarize the main points stated in the body and close smoothly.

Let’s take a closer look at this structure. We’ll examine these parts out of order—first, the

introduction, then the conclusion and lastly the body where we’ll spend most of our time.

Drafting the Introduction

The introduction sets the stage and tone for your message. Although the content and length of

your introduction may vary with the writing template, the introduction should, at a minimum,

clearly state your purpose (“bottom line”) and the direction you plan to take the audience.

A typical introduction has three components: stage setting remarks, a purpose statement and an

overview.

•

Stage-setting remarks set the tone of the communication, capture the audience’s attention

and encourage them to read further. Stage-setting remarks are optional, so you can omit

them in very short messages or in messages where you don’t want to waste words.

•

The purpose statement is the one sentence you’d keep if you had only one. It specifically

states your purpose, thesis or main point. For some examples and more details, refer

back to chapter 3.

•

The overview is like a good roadmap—it clearly presents your main points, previews

your paragraph sequence and ties your main points to your purpose.

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Step 5 (Draft)

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Stage-Setting Remarks: Use them properly!

Stage-setting remarks are optional. Though they add polish to an introduction, your

reader has to be able to pick which sentences are “setting the stage” and which sentence

is the “bottom line.”

If you’ve received feedback that readers are sometimes confused about the purpose of

your writing, get to the point quickly and don’t overdo stage-setting remarks. Too many

preliminaries can backfire and actually confuse the reader.

Keep the BLUF (bottom line up front) acronym in mind as you write.

Here’s an example of a short introduction that contains all three components:

Communication is essential to mission accomplishment, and all Air Force

personnel should be able to write effectively. (Stage-Setting Remarks) This

handbook provides general guidelines and specific formats for use in both staff

environments and Professional Military Education schools. (Purpose Statement)

It begins with an overarching philosophy on military communication, then

describes processes and techniques to improve writing and speaking products, and

summarizes the most common formats used in Air Force communication.

(Overview)

Even though readers read the introduction first, you don’t have to write it first. If

the introduction doesn’t come easily or naturally, you can work on another part of the

communication and then return to it. Some writers backpedal and don’t want to work on

the introduction until the rest of the communication is written. Others insist it guides

them in shaping the content or body of their message. Regardless of when you write the

introduction, make sure that it captures your purpose and make sure it prepares your

audience for what is to come.

Here’s the bottom line on your introduction: It must be an appropriate length for your

specific communication and it should contain a clear statement of your purpose and direction.

Drafting the Conclusion

The conclusion is the last and often neglected part of a well-arranged communication.

Sometimes inexperienced writers stop writing as soon as they finish discussing their last main

idea. That’s not an effective conclusion. The conclusion is your last chance to summarize your

communication and give your audience a sense of closure.

An effective conclusion often summarizes the overall theme and main points discussed in the

body. If you have a simple, straightforward purpose, you might want to emphasize it by

restating it in slightly different words in the conclusion. If you have a complicated purpose or a

long, involved communication, you’ll probably need to emphasize your main ideas and state

your proposals or recommendations.

For effective endings, restate the main ideas or observations or emphasize the main thrusts of

arguments. Under no circumstances apologize for real or perceived inadequacies or inject weak

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afterthoughts. Conclude your communication with positive statements based on your preceding

discussion. In general, avoid bringing up new ideas in the conclusion; these belong in the body

of your communication.

Your introduction and conclusion should balance each other without being identical. To check

this, read your introduction and then immediately read your conclusion to determine if your

conclusion flows logically from your introduction and whether it fulfills your purpose. An

effective conclusion leaves you with a sense you’re justified in ending your communication.

You’re ready to call it a day only when you assure your audience you’ve accomplished the

purpose stated in your introduction.

Introductions and conclusions: How long?

The length of your introduction and conclusion will be proportional to the length of your

overall writing assignment. On a one-page assignment, they may be very short, while

lengthy staff studies or publications may contain introductions and conclusions that are

several paragraphs long. Introductions and conclusions to books are often an entire

chapter!

Remember that introductions and conclusions are designed to help your readers; use good

judgment in determining the appropriate length for your assignment.

Recall our sample introduction; here’s a short conclusion derived from that introduction and the

body (which we don’t have right now):

As Air Force personnel, we can’t accomplish our mission without effective

communication. Hopefully, this handbook has provided you with some practical

tools to improve your communication skills, specifically speaking and writing.

Keep it handy and refer to it often as you prepare and review a variety of spoken

and written products throughout your career.

Even without the “body” available, you can see how the introduction and conclusion

complement each other.

Drafting the Body

The body of your communication is the heart of your message. It includes your main ideas about

your subject and supporting details under each main idea.

The body typically consists of several paragraphs. The total number of paragraphs (and overall

length of the body) will depend on your purpose and subject. As a general rule, write a separate

paragraph for each main idea—you might confuse your reader if you have two or more main

ideas in a single paragraph. In a longer communication, you may find it necessary to use more

than one paragraph to cover one main point or idea.

So much for a quick review of introductions, conclusions and bodies, let’s now dig down a little

deeper into the paragraphs that make up the body of your communication.

CHAPTER 7:

Step 5 (Draft)

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Drafting Effective Paragraphs

Paragraphs Should Contain One Main Point

Paragraphs are the primary vehicles to develop ideas in your writing. They serve three purposes:

1. To group related ideas into single units of thought.

2. To separate one unit of thought from another unit.

3. To alert your readers you’re shifting to another phase of your subject.

An effective paragraph is a functional unit with clusters of ideas built around a single main point

or idea and linked with other clusters preceding and following it. It’s not an arbitrary collection

designed for physical convenience. It performs a definite, planned function—it presents a single

major idea or point, describes an event, or creates an impression.

Most staff writing depends on relatively short paragraphs of three to seven sentences. If you

follow this practice, you’ll be more likely to develop clear, easy-to-read paragraphs. The length

of each paragraph will vary because some main points need more supporting details than others.

In general, the flow of your paragraphs will follow the organizational pattern or format you

selected in Step 4: “Organizing and Outlining” (chapter 6). That is, you build your paragraphs

to meet the structural requirements of your overall communication. But you can use analogy,

examples, definition, and comparison and contrast to develop single paragraphs within your

overall pattern. The guiding principle is to develop one main idea or point in each paragraph.

Topic Sentences: Capturing the Main Point of Each Paragraph

In staff writing, it’s helpful to start off each paragraph with a topic sentence that captures the

subject or controlling idea of the paragraph. The topic sentence prepares the reader for the rest

of the paragraph and provides a point of focus for support, details, facts, figures and examples.

If your readers are confused, check your topic sentences!

A topic sentence announces your intent for a single paragraph in the same way

a purpose statement announces your intent for the entire writing assignment.

Most readers are better able to understand how ideas relate to each other if they

know what’s coming.

If you’ve received feedback that readers have trouble understanding the “flow”

of your writing, check your topic sentences. Does one exist for each

paragraph? Can you find it? Do they start off the paragraph? Do they tie back

to your purpose statement?

In the body, don’t make your reader search for the topic sentences of your paragraphs. (As

stated earlier, the rules are different for introductions and conclusions.) Since the topic sentence

is the subject and main idea of the paragraph, the best place for it is up front—the first sentence.

This helps with clarity and makes things convenient for your readers. Many people need only

general information about the content of certain letters, reports and directives. Scanning topic

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sentences at the beginning of paragraphs for the most important ideas saves a lot of time. If your

readers need more details, they can always read beyond your topic sentences.

Once you’ve written a topic sentence, the rest of the paragraph should fall neatly in place. Other

sentences between the topic sentence and the last sentence must be closely related to expand,

emphasize and support the topic sentence. In some paragraphs, the last sentence is used to

summarize key points, clinch the main idea in the reader’s mind, or serve as a transition to the

next topic sentence. (We’ll talk more about transitions in the next section.) Eliminate any

“extra” sentences that don’t perform one of these functions.

Though most writers will draft an entire paragraph at a time, an alternate drafting strategy is

to first write all the topic sentences in your body. Once the topic sentences are completed, go

back and write the rest of the paragraphs, one at a time. Drafting the topic sentences first

requires the writer to stay focused on the “big picture” and can help produce a clear and well-

organized draft. This technique can be very useful for longer writing assignments and is

recommended for writers who struggle to organize their writing.

Here’s the bottom line on body paragraphs: Each paragraph should have one main point or

idea captured in a topic sentence, preferably at the beginning of the paragraph. Use supporting

ideas to prove, clarify, illustrate and develop your main point. Your objective is to help your

readers see your paragraphs as integrated units rather than mere collections of sentences.

Transitions: Bridges between Different Ideas

One way to make sure your paragraphs flow together, both internally and externally, is by using

transitions in the form of words, phrases and sentences. Internal transitions improve the flow of

sentences within a paragraph while external transitions link separate paragraphs together within

the body of your communication.

Internal Transitions

Internal transitions are one or more related words that show the relationship between ideas

within a paragraph. Woven skillfully into your writing, internal transitions help your reader

follow your line of thought. Some internal transitions show a relationship between two ideas

inside a single sentence: “First go home, and then clean your room.”

Other internal transitions show a relationship between two or more sentences within a single

paragraph such as this example: “Our plan for Saturday afternoon involves both business and

pleasure. First, all the kids will come home at noon, and we’ll eat lunch. Next, we’ll get the

house cleaned—the whole mess. Finally, we’ll go out for ice cream and a movie.”

Take a look at the next page for a bulletin board of transitional words and phrases that provide

the ideal logic links between your key points and the mind of the reader. In most cases, favor the

short, spoken ones over the long, bookish ones. For example, use but more than however, so

more than therefore, and also more than in addition. Remember, different transitions require

different punctuation. If you’re uncertain about the rules, check out Appendix 1. For example,

you can use “so” in place of “therefore” for a much easier to read sentence, as shown below:

“The movie was too long; therefore, we left after three hours.”

“The movie was too long, so we left after three hours.”

CHAPTER 7:

Step 5 (Draft)

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Transition “Bulletin Board”

To Contrast Ideas

To Show Time

To Relate Thoughts

• but

• yet

• nevertheless

• however

• still

• conversely

• on the one hand

• instead of

• neither of these

• (to) (on) the contrary

• rather than

• no matter what

• much less as

• in contrast

• otherwise

• on the other hand

• in the (first) (second) place

• nor

• according to

• immediately

• presently

• nearly a ___ later

• meantime

• meanwhile

• afterward

• next

• as of today

• this year, however

• a little later

• then last year

• next week

• tomorrow

• as of now

• finally

• indeed

• anyway, anyhow

• elsewhere

• nearby

• above all

• even these

• beyond

• in other words

• for instance

• of course

• in short

• in sum

• yet

• in reality

• that is

• by consequence

• notwithstanding

• nonetheless

• as a general rule

• understandably

• traditionally

• the reason, of course

• the lesson here is

• from all information

• at best

• naturally

• in the broader sense

• to this end

• in fact

To Compare Ideas

To Show Results

To Add Ideas

• like

• just as

• similar

• this

• therefore

• as a result

• thus

• consequently

• hence

• first, second, next, last, etc.

• in addition

• additionally

• moreover

• furthermore

• another

• besides

• clear, too, is

• the answer does not only lie

• to all that

• more than anything else

• here are some … facts

• now, of course, there are

• now however

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There are many ways to bridge gaps in thought and move the reader from one idea to another.

One classic transitional approach involves repetition of key words at the beginning of individual

sentences. This is especially popular in formal or ceremonial writing or speaking. Notice how

the writer of the following paragraph repeated simplicity, incisiveness and focus to make points

clear:

The effective presentation of concepts depends on simplicity, incisiveness and

focus. Simplicity is necessary under time constraints when there’s insufficient

time for complicated relationships. Incisiveness fixes an idea in the listener’s

mind, appeals to common sense and facilitates understanding. Focus limits the

subject to essentials, promoting the presenter’s objectives.

Internal transitions, in the form of one or more related words, are key to a well-written paragraph

because they guide the reader between related ideas. But how do we move from paragraph to

paragraph? We need external transitions to knit together their main points.

External Transitions

External transitions are typically sentences or paragraphs that guide the reader between

separate paragraphs and major sections of your communication.

Transitional paragraphs are usually reserved for long papers, books and reports that contain

major sections or chapters. They are used to summarize one section and lead the reader to the

next section, or they introduce the next section and tie it to the preceding section. Transitional

paragraphs are not commonly used in staff writing, but are often seen in books and academic

essays.

The short paragraph immediately above this section (“Internal transitions, in the form of one or

more related words…”) is an example of a transitional paragraph. As you can see, it sums up the

previous section on internal transitions and then introduces the new section on external

transitions.

Let’s look closer at transitional sentences, which you’ll probably use more frequently than

transitional paragraphs. A transitional sentence is often used to bridge main points in two

separate paragraphs (though not every new paragraph requires an external transition). There are

three options of a transitional sentence bridging paragraph 1 and paragraph 2:

• Option 1: It can be a stand-alone sentence at the end of paragraph 1.

• Option 2: It can be a stand-alone sentence at the beginning of paragraph 2 (In this case,

paragraph 2’s topic sentence is the second sentence in the paragraph).

• Option 3: It can be merged with the topic sentence of paragraph 2 (In this case, the

“transitional” part of the sentence is a separate clause at the beginning of the sentence).

Let’s look at a situation where a transitional sentence is appropriate. Suppose we have two

paragraphs: Paragraph 1 describes parking problems; paragraph 2 describes potential solutions

to the parking problems. Here’s an example of a stand-alone transitional sentence for these

paragraphs:

Fortunately, we can solve these parking problems if we offer our people

some incentives to use car pools. (transitional sentence)

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Step 5 (Draft)

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If this sentence were at the end of paragraph 1 (option 1), paragraph 2 would start with a topic

sentence written something like this:

We can offer our personnel three incentives to participate in car pools:

preferred parking spaces, guaranteed duty hours and distant parking for

nonparticipants. (topic sentence)

If our transitional sentence were at the beginning of paragraph 2 (option 2), then our topic

sentence would be the second sentence in paragraph 2, like this:

Fortunately, we can solve these parking problems if we offer our people some

incentives to use carpools. (transitional sentence) We can offer them three

incentives: preferred parking spaces, guaranteed duty hours, and distant parking

for nonparticipants. (topic sentence)

Now let’s look at our third option where we merge the transition with the topic sentence of

paragraph 2. In this case, we have one sentence instead of two, like this:

Fortunately, we can solve these parking problems (transitional clause) by

offering our people three incentives to participate in car pools: preferred

parking spaces, guaranteed duty hours and distant parking for

nonparticipants (topic of paragraph 2).

Whether used at the end or beginning of a paragraph, transitional sentences can make your

writing smoother and make your reader happier!

Headings as Transitions

Another effective way to transition from one major area to another, especially in a longer report,

is to use headings. They allow your reader to follow along easily, even at a glance. Headings

are also helpful when topics vary widely. Be informative: headings focus readers from broad

topics to more detailed topics. Avoid relying on headings that use one or two vague words but

do not use more words than are needed. Here are a couple examples.

For: Procedures; Try: How to Complete AF Form XXXX

For: Contractors; Try: How Much Contractors May Charge

Now that you have a good idea of how to draft “the big picture” part of your communication—

your introduction, conclusion and paragraphs in the body—it’s time to dig a little deeper. It’s

time to look at building effective sentences within your paragraphs.

Drafting Effective Sentences

To draft clear and concise sentences, choose clear and concise words and phrases to make up

your sentences. In this section, we’ll cover some of the most important considerations when

writing effective sentences: active voice, smothered verbs, parallel construction, misplaced

modifiers, using the right word for the job and avoiding wordy words and phrases. Let’s get

started with probably the most common pitfall to clear and concise sentences—not writing

actively.

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Write Actively: Doers Before Verbs

Is your active voice all bottled up? Active voice shows the subject as the actor. For example:

The girl sang a song. By using mostly active voice, your writing is clear, concise and alive—it

reaches out to the reader and gets to the point quickly with fewer words. Unfortunately, many

writers overuse passive voice. Passive voice shows the subject as receiver of the action. For

example: A song was sung by her. Besides lengthening and twisting sentences, passive verbs

often muddy them. Whereas active sentences must have doers, passive ones are complete

without them. When you overuse passive voice and reverse the natural subject-verb-object

pattern, your writing becomes lifeless.

• Your support is appreciated …

• Requisitions should be submitted …

• The IG team will be appointed …

• It is requested that you submit …

The actor (or doer) in the sentence is either obscure, absent altogether or just lying there. Who

appreciates? Who should requisition? Who appoints? Why not write …

• I appreciate your support …

• Submit your requisitions …

• Colonel Hall will appoint the IG team …

• Please submit …

The Symptoms of Passive Voice and Three Cures

How can you diagnose passive voice? You don’t have to be a grammarian to recognize passive

voice. First, find the verb by asking yourself, “What’s happening in this sentence?” Then find

the actor by asking, “Who’s doing it?” If the actor comes after the verb, it’s passive voice. Also,

watch for these forms of the verb to be (am, is, are, was, were, be, being, been) and a main verb

usually ending in -ed or -en. Let’s look at a few examples and then try the cures, below.

Passive: The mouse was eaten by the cat.

Active: The cat ate the mouse.

Passive: Livelier sentences will be written by you.

Active: You will write livelier sentences.

Passive: Water is drunk by everybody.

Active: Everybody drinks water.

1. Put the Actor (Doer) Before the Verb.

This: The handlers must have broken the part.

Not: The part must have been broken by the handlers.

2. Drop Part of the Verb.

This: The results are in the attachment.

Not: The results are listed in the attachment.

3. Change the Verb.

This: The replacement has not arrived yet.

Not: The replacement has not been received yet.

CHAPTER 7:

Step 5 (Draft)

- 75 -

Though most writers overuse passive voice, sometimes it’s appropriate. Clear and forceful

language may be inappropriate in diplomacy or in political negotiations. Passive voice is also

used to soften bad news, or when the doer or actor of the action is unknown, unimportant,

obvious or better left unnamed. Here are a few examples:

The part was shipped on 1 June. (The doer is unimportant.)

Presidents are elected every four years. (The doer is obvious.)

Christmas has been scheduled as a workday. (The doer is better left unnamed.)

The bottom line: Passive voice is wordy, indirect, unclear and reverses the natural order of

English. Active voice is clear and concise. Using verbs correctly—actively—is key to writing

clear, concise and interesting sentences. Activate your writing!

Smothered Verbs

Make your verbs do the work for you. Weak writing relies on general verbs that take extra

words to complete their meaning. Don’t use a general verb (make) plus extra words (a choice)

when you can use one specific verb (choose).

Wordy: The IG team held a meeting to give consideration to the printing issue.

Better: The IG team met to consider the printing issue.

Wordy: They made the decision to give their approval.

Better: They decided to approve it.

Here’s another tip on verbs—watch out for words ending in -ion and –ment—these are verbs

turned into nouns. Change these nouns to verbs: your sentences will be shorter and livelier.

Wordy: Use that format for the preparation of your command history.

Better: Use that format to prepare your command history.

Wordy: The settlement of travel claims involves the examination of orders.

Better: Settling travel claims involves examining orders.

We’ve spent a lot of time looking at verbs because they’re the most important words in your

sentences. The bottom line: keep verbs active, lively, specific, concise and out in front, not

hidden. Another potential stumbling block for readers is “unparallelism.”

Parallel Construction (Parallelism)

Use a consistent pattern when making a list. If your sentence contains a series of items separated

by commas, keep the grammatical construction similar—if two of three items start with a verb,

make the third item start with a verb. Violations occur when writers mix things and actions,

statements and questions, and active and passive instructions. The trick is to be consistent.

Make ideas of equal importance look equal.

Needs work: The functions of a military staff are to advise the commander, transmit

instructions and implementation of decisions. [Advise and transmit are verbs, while

implementation is a noun.]

Acceptable: The functions of a military staff are to advise the commander, transmit

instructions and implement decisions. [Parallel ideas are now written in the same

grammatical form.]

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 337, 27 MAY 2015

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Needs work: The security policeman told us to observe the speed limit and we should dim

our lights. [Parallel ideas are not written in the same grammatical form.]

Acceptable: The security policeman told us to observe the speed limit and to dim our lights.

Needs work: Universal military values include that we should act with integrity, dedication

to duty, the belief that freedom is worth dying for and service before self.

Acceptable: Universal military values include commitment to integrity, dedication to duty,

service before self, and the belief that freedom is worth dying for.

If one of the items in a list can’t be written in the same grammatical structure, place it at the end

of the sentence. In the previous example, “the belief that freedom is worth dying for” does not

match the three-word construction of the other items, but its placement helps the sentence’s

readability. Active voice, strong verbs and parallelism can help make your sentences clear and

concise. Now, let’s look at some more things you can do to write effective sentences—using the

right word for the job.

Use the Right Word for the Job

Without generalizations and abstractions, and lots of them, we would drown in detail. We sum

up vast amounts of experience when we speak of dedication, programs, hardware and lines of

authority. But such abstract language isn’t likely to evoke the same experiences in each reader’s

mind. Lazy writing overuses vague terms such as immense dedication, enhanced programs,

viable hardware and responsive lines of authority. It especially weakens job descriptions and

performance evaluations, etc.

Be Concrete

Do not write “The commander will give guidance,” or “The equipment must meet specs.” Your

reader might wonder what kind of guidance or what kind of specs? Neither you nor your readers

can tackle the problem until you are specific. Be as definite as the situation permits. Include

only the ideas your reader needs and then give those ideas no more words than they deserve.

Use the Right Word for the Job

For

Try

For

Try

commanders

MAJCOM commanders

Ford

Focus

headache

migraine

emotion

love

car, vehicle

Ford

plane

F-22

smartphone

iPhone 4

socialize

mingle, meet

Know Various Shades of Meaning.

Use different words to express various shades of meaning. The writer with an adequate

vocabulary writes about the aroma of a cigar, the fragrance of a flower, the scent of perfume or

the odor of gas instead of the smell of all these things.

CHAPTER 7:

Step 5 (Draft)

- 77 -

Judge the Jargon

The aim of all communication is to make a personal contact in the simplest possible way, and the

simplest way is to use familiar, everyday words. Above all, it must be adapted to specific

circumstances with a minimum of jargon. Jargon consists of “shorthand” words, phrases or

abbreviations that are peculiar to a relatively small group of people. DEROS (Date Eligible to

Return from Overseas) and AWOL (Absent Without Leave) are examples of military jargon.

Every profession has it. NPO which means Nil Per Os (nothing by mouth) and contusion

(bruise) are examples of medical jargon. Writers often use jargon in their sentences to fill space

and impress the naive. Unfortunately, overuse of jargon can backfire on you by actually

confusing your reader. CAUTION! Before you use jargon, make sure you have carefully

assessed the audience and use terms that will be familiar to them. Keep it simple with everyday

words and phrases, or at least explain any jargon you must use. If you use an abbreviation, spell

it out the first time it appears. If it appears only twice or infrequently, spell out the term every

time and avoid the abbreviation entirely. For more on abbreviations see Appendix 1.

Clichés

Clichés are expressions that have lost their impact because they have been overused. Strive for

originality in your choice of words and phrases. The list of clichés below is not exhaustive. You

just may not find your favorite here.

Clichés

acid test

add insult to injury

armed to the teeth

as a matter of fact

at a loss for words

banker’s hours

battle royal

beat a hasty retreat

beauty and the beast

benefit of the doubt

better late than never

bewildering variety

beyond the shadow of a doubt

bite the dust

blazing inferno

blessed event

blessing in disguise

blissful ignorance

brave as a lion

break of day

bright and early

bull in a china shop

burn one’s bridges

burn the midnight oil

burning issue

bury the hatchet

busy as a bee

by the same token

calm before the storm

cherished belief

clear the decks

club-wielding police

colorful scene

conspicuous by its absence

cool as a cucumber

coveted award

crack of dawn

crack troops

cutting edge

dramatic new move

dread disease

dream come true

drop in the bucket

easier said than done

fame and fortune

feast or famine

fickle fortune

food for thought

from the face of the earth

gentle hint

glaring omission

glutton for punishment

gory details

grief stricken

grim reaper

hammer out (an agreement)

hand in glove

happy couple

hard as a rock

head over heels in love

heart of gold

heavily armed troops

honest as the day is long

hook, line and sinker

hungry as wolves

in short supply

in this day and age

intensive investigation

iron out (problems)

irony of fate

it goes without saying

Lady Luck

lash out

last but not least

last-ditch stand

leaps and bounds

leave no stone unturned

lend a helping hand

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AFH 337, 27 MAY 2015

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Clichés

light at the end of the tunnel

lightning speed

limp into port

lock, stock and barrel

long arm of the law

man in the street

marvels of science

matrimonial bliss (knot)

meager pension

miraculous escape

moment of truth

more than meets the eye

Mother Nature

move into high gear

never a dull moment

Old Man Winter

on more than one occasion

paint a grim picture

pay the supreme penalty

picture of health

pillar of (the church, society)

pinpoint the cause

police dragnet

pool of blood

posh resort

powder keg

predawn darkness

prestigious law firm

proud heritage

proud parents

pursuit of excellence

quick as a flash

radiant bride

red faces, red-faced

reign supreme

reins of government

round of applause

rushed to the scene

sadder but wiser

scantily clad

scintilla of evidence

scurried to shelter

selling like hotcakes

sharp as a razor

sings like a bird

spearheading the campaign

spirited debate

spotlessly clean

sprawling base, facility

spreading like wildfire

steaming jungle

stick out like a sore thumb

storm of protest

stranger than fiction

supreme sacrifice

surprise move

sweep under the rug

sweet harmony

sweetness and light

tempest in a teapot

tender mercies

terror stricken

tip of the iceberg

to no avail

too numerous to mention

tower of strength

tragic death

trail of death and destruction

true colors

vanish in thin air

walking encyclopedia

wave of the future

wealth of information whirlwind campaign

wouldn’t touch that with

a 10-foot pole

Easily Confused Words

Many writers and speakers frequently confuse the meaning of some words. Here’s a small list of

some easily confused words. Be on the lookout for others.

Easily Confused Words

• accept: verb, receive

• except: verb or preposition, omitting or

leaving out

• exceptional: out of the ordinary

• exceptionable: objectionable

• advice: noun, counsel given, an opinion

• advise: verb, to give counsel or advice

• farther: expresses distance

• further: expresses degree

• affect: verb, to influence or feign

• effect: noun, result; verb, to bring about

• fewer: refers to numbers; countable items

• less: refers to mass; items can’t be counted

• aggravate: make worse or intensify

• annoy: disturb or irritate

• formally: in a formal manner

• formerly: in the past

• all ready: everyone is prepared

• already: adverb, by specific time

• hanged: to execute; criminals are hanged

• hung: suspended or nailed up; pictures are

hung

CHAPTER 7:

Step 5 (Draft)

- 79 -

Easily Confused Words

• all together: collectively or in a group

• altogether: wholly or entirely

• healthy: possessing health

• healthful: conducive to health

• wholesome: healthful as applied to food or

climate

• alright: not acceptable spelling

• all right: satisfactory

• imply: to hint at or suggest

• infer: to draw a conclusion based on evidence

• allusion: indirect reference

• delusion: false belief

• illusion: a false impression

• incredible: unbelievable, improbable

• incredulous: skeptical, doubting

• alumni: men graduates or group of men and

women graduates

• alumnae: women graduates

• instance: example

• instant: moment of time

• incident: event or an occurrence

• among: used when more than two alternatives

• between: used when only two alternatives

• ingenious: clever or resourceful

• ingenuous: innocently frank or candid

• amount: quantity that can’t be counted or

measured in units

• number: quantity counted and measured in

units

• later: after the usual time

• latter: to designate the second of two things

mentioned

• anxious: worry or fearfulness

• eager: keen desire

• lay: to place

• lie: to recline; to stretch out

• apt: suitable, quick to learn, natural tendency

• liable: legally responsible

• likely: refers to the probable, probability

• likely: a favorable probability

• liable: legally responsible

• apt: a natural fitness or tendency

• as: a subordinate conjunction

• like: a preposition

• lose: a verb

• loose: primarily an adjective

• avocation: hobby

• vocation: customary employment

• luxuriant: abundant growth

• luxurious: pertains to luxury

• beside: preposition, next to or near

• besides: adverb, in addition; preposition,

addition to

• may be: a modal verb

• maybe: perhaps

• bi-: occurring every two (units of time)

• semi-: occurring twice (during the time period)

• moneys: currency

• monies: amount of money

• bring: action toward the speaker

• take: action away from the speaker

• morale: refers to a spirit or a mood

• moral: refers to right conduct

• can: ability

• may: permission

• persecute: to afflict or harass

• prosecute: to pursue until finished or to bring

legal action against a defendant

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 337, 27 MAY 2015

- 80 -

Easily Confused Words

• capital: city or money

• capitol: a building

• practical: useful, sensible

• practicable: feasible; a person cannot be

practicable

• censor: examine in order to forbid if

objectionable

• censure: condemn or to reprimand

• principal: adjective, foremost; noun, main

person

• principle: noun, precept or idea

• compliment: praise

• complement: supplies a lack; it completes

• raise: to lift or cause to be lifted

• rise: to move to a higher position

• compose: to constitute

• comprise: to include or consist of

• respectively: in the order given

• respectfully: full of respect

• consul: foreign representative

• council: a group

• counsel: advice, to give advice

• set: to put or to place

• sit: to occupy a seat

• contemptible: base, worthless, despicable

• contemptuous: expressing contempt or disdain

• shape: condition of being

• condition: state, situation

• continually: closely recurrent intervals

• continuously: without pause or break

• sometime: at some unspecified time

• some time: a period of time

• sometimes: now and then

• credible: believable

• creditable: deserving credit or honor

• credulous: ready to believe anything

• specie: coin

• species: a kind or variety

• disinterested: impartial or objective

• uninterested: indifferent

• stationary: in a fixed place

• stationery: writing paper, envelopes

• eligible: qualified to be chosen

• illegible: unable to read

• than: conjunction of comparison

• then: adverb, at that time

• emigrate: to leave a country to settle in another

• immigrate: to enter a country to settle there

• their: third person plural pronoun, possessive

• there: adverb or interjection

• they’re: contraction of they are

• eminent: noted or renowned

• imminent: impending

• verbal: applies to that which is communicated

in words, spoken or written

• oral: applies only to that which is spoken

• enervating: weakening

• invigorating: stimulating

• who: refers to people

• which: refers to things

• ensure: guarantee

• insure: obtain insurance for

CHAPTER 7:

Step 5 (Draft)

- 81 -

Doubleheaders

The Word by Rene J. Cappon details how to avoid writing a project’s importance and

significance when importance will do. Even a person’s success and achievement is okay with

just success. Pairs of words with similar meanings add bulk. Although test and evaluate are

different, the differences may not be important for all audiences. When you’re tempted to use

two words, try one to say it all. Thomas Jefferson said: “The most valuable of all talents is that

of never using two words when one will do.”

Doubleheaders

aid and abet

each and every

ready and willing

beck and call

fair and just

right and proper

betwixt and between

few and far between

safe and sound

bits and pieces

irrelevant and immaterial

shy and withdrawn

blunt and brutal

nervous and distraught

smooth and silky

bound and determined

nook and cranny

success and achievement

clear and simple

null and void

sum and substance

confused and bewildered

part and parcel

test and evaluate

disgraced and dishonored

pick and choose

various and sundry

Repetitive Redundancy

Not every noun needs an adjective. Not every adjective needs an adverb. Not every writer

has gotten the message. Keep your pencil from adding modifiers to those nouns that need no

additional voltage. Serious danger, stern warning, deadly poison, grave crisis are examples;

the nouns operate better without the modifiers.

Repetitive Redundancy

absolutely conclusive

advance planning

agricultural crops

anthracite coal

ascend upward

assemble together

awkward dilemma

basic fundamental

big in size

bisect in two

blend together

both alike

capitol building

chief protagonist;

leading protagonist;

or main protagonist

close proximity

coalesce together

collaborate together or jointly

complete monopoly

completely full

completely unanimous

congregate together

connect together

consensus of opinion

continue to persist

courthouse building

current or present incumbent

descend downward

divisive quarrel

doctorate degree

end result

exact counterpart

entirely absent

erupt violently

first beginning

fellow colleague

few in number

from whence

founder and sink

free gift

gather together

fuse together

future plan

habitual custom

general public

grateful thanks

individual person

hired mercenary

hoist up

join together

invited guest

irreducible minimum

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AFH 337, 27 MAY 2015

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Repetitive Redundancy

lonely hermit

knots per hour

large in size

mutual cooperation

meaningless gibberish

merge together

new record

necessary need

new innovation

old antique

new recruit

old adage

original founder

opening gambit

organic life

past history

original prototype

passing fad

personal opinion

patently obvious

personal friend

protrude out

pointed barb

present incumbent

recoil back

real fact

recall back

shuttle back and forth

recur again or repeatedly

short in length or height

small in size

single unit

skirt around

temporary reprieve

tall in height

two twins

universal panacea

true facts

ultimate outcome

vitally necessary

violent explosion

visible to the eye

Wordy Words and Phrases vs. Simpler Words and Phrases

Many people use certain wordy words and needless phrases, such as phrases introduced by

prepositions like at, on, for, in, to and by. They don’t add substance; they weaken the message

by cluttering the words that carry meaning. So prune the deadwood. The longer it takes to say

something, the weaker you come across.

The use of simpler words and phrases in your communications may help convey your meaning;

however, there are times when more formal or complex words and phrases convey the intended

meaning best and are appropriate. For example, contractions are generally not used in formal

policy letters or directions intended for a wide audience, such as an entire squadron, group, wing,

or higher, or in academic work. This ensures clarity over simplicity. Your situation will dictate

which is best to use; when appropriate, use simpler words and phrases.

INSTEAD OF

TRY

a great deal of

much

a minimum of

at least

a number of

some, many, few

a period of (2 days)

for

abandon

give up

abet

help, assist, aid

abeyance (hold in)

delay, postpone, wait

abridge

shorten, condense

abrogate

do away with, abolish, cancel, revoke

accelerate

speed up, hasten

take, receive

accommodate

make fit, make room for, allow for

accompany

go with

accomplish

carry out, do, complete

accomplish (a form)

fill out, complete, fill in, prepare

according to

per

accordingly

so, then, therefore

accrue

add, gain

accumulate

gather, amass, collect

accurate

correct, exact, right

achieve

do, make

achieve the maximum

get the most from, excel

acquire

get, gain, earn, win

INSTEAD OF

TRY

activate

start, drive, put into action, turn on

active consideration

consider

activities

actions

actual

real, true

actual emergency

emergency

actual facts

facts

actuate

induce, move, drive, impel

additional

added, more, other, further

address

speech, speak of, speak to, deal with

adequate

enough, plenty

adjacent to

next to

advanced plans

plans

advantageous

helpful, useful, beneficial, good

adverse to

against, opposed to

advise

recommend, tell, inform

advised (keep me)

informed (or “inform me”)

affirmative

agree, assent to, say “yes”

affix

put, stick, attach, place, add

affix a signature

sign

afford an opportunity

allow, let, permit

after the conclusion of

after

agency

office

aggregate

all, total, sum, combined, whole, entire

CHAPTER 7:

Step 5 (Draft)

- 83 -

INSTEAD OF

TRY

aircraft

military plane

all of

all

allegation

charge, claim, assertion

alleviate

ease, relieve, lessen

allotment

share, portion

along the lines of

like, similar to

alter, alteration

change

alternative

choice, option, substitute

amalgamate

merge, combine, unite, mix

ambient

surrounding

ameliorate

better, improve

annually

yearly

antedate

precede

anticipate

expect, foresee

antipathy

dislike, distaste

antithesis

opposite, contrast

anxiety

fear

apparent

clear, plain, visible

apparently

seemingly, clearly

appear

seem

appellation

name

append

add, attach

applicable

which applies, proper, correct, suitable

application

use (noun)

appreciable

many

appreciate

value

apprise

tell, inform

appropriate

proper, right, apt, pertinent, fit

approximately

about, nearly, almost

are desirous of

want to

are in receipt of

received

as a matter of fact

in fact

as a means of

as a result of

because

as against

against

as and when

as, when (not both)

as at present advised

as advised

as of (this date)

by (today), today

as prescribed by

under, per

as to whether

whether, if

ascertain

find out, learn, make sure

assert

claim, declare

assimilate

absorb, digest, join, include

assist, assistance

aid, help

at a later date

later

at a much greater rate

faster, more quickly

at all times

always

at an early date

soon

at present

now, currently, presently

at such time

when

at the present time

currently, at present, now

at the time of

when

at this juncture (time)

now

at your earliest

convenience (formal)

as soon as you can

(informal, more direct)

attached herewith is

here is

attached please find

here is, attached is, enclosed is

attain

reach, gain, achieve

attempt

try

attempts to

tries

attention is invited to

note, see

attired

dressed

augment

add, increase, extend, enlarge, raise

authored

wrote

authoritative

valid, official

INSTEAD OF

TRY

authority

sanction, control, guidance

authorize

allow, let, permit, empower, prescribe

autonomous

independent

avail yourself of

use

availability

presence, use

based on the fact that

because

be acquainted with

know

be cognizant of

know

be of assistance to

assist, help, aid

befall

happen, occur

behest

request, order

behoove

(avoid) proper, helpful, beneficial

benefit

help

bestow

give

betterment

improvement

biannual

twice a year

biennial

once in 2 years

bilateral

two sided

bona fide

real, genuine, sincere

brief (duration)

short, quick

brook (tolerate)

allow

burgeoning

increasing, growing

by means of

by, with

by virtue of

because, by, under

came to an end

ended

capability

ability

capable

able

care should be taken

be careful, take care

category

class, group

characteristic

trait (noun), typical of (adjective)

characterize

describe, portray

circuitous

roundabout

classify

arrange

close proximity

close, near

cognizant of

aware of, know, understand,

comprehend

coincidentally

at the same time

collaboration

(see “cooperation”)

colloquy

discussion, talk

combine

join

combined

joint

comes into conflict

conflicts

commence

begin, start

commensurate

equal to, to agree with

commensurate with

corresponding, according, equal to

communicate verbally

talk, discuss, say, tell

compensate,

compensation

pay

comply (with)

follow, carry out, meet, satisfy

component

part

comprehend

grasp, take in, understand

comprehensive

all-inclusive, thorough

comprise

form, include, make up, contain

comprised of

made up of, consists of

concerning

about, on

conclude

close, end, think, figure, decide

conclusion

end

concur

agree, approve

condition

state, event, facts

conduct (verb)

carry out, manage, direct, lead

confront

face, meet, oppose

conjecture

guess

connection

link, tie

connotation

meaning

consensus of opinion

agreement, verdict, general, view

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 337, 27 MAY 2015

- 84 -

INSTEAD OF

TRY

consequently

so, therefore

consider

look at, think about, regard

considerable (amount)

large, great

consolidate

combine, join, merge

constitutes

is, forms, makes up

construct

build, make

consult

ask

consummate

finish, complete

contained in

containing

has, that have, etc.

contains

has

contemporaneously

at the same time

contiguous

next to, near, touching

continue

keep on

contractual agreement

agreement, contract

contribute

give

cooperate together

cooperate, help

cooperation

jointly, with

coordination

staff action, relate, agree, conform

couched

phrased, worded

course of time

time

criteria (plural)

standards, rules, yardsticks

criterion (singular)

standard, norm

currently

now (or leave out)

de-emphasize

play down

decelerate

slow down, reduce speed

deem

think, judge, hold, believe

deficiency

defect, shortage, lack

definitely

final

delegate authority

empower, assign

delineate

draw, describe, portray, outline

delinquent

late

demeanor

manner, conduct

demise

death

demonstrate

prove, show, explain

depart

leave

depict

describe, show

deprivation

loss

deprive

take away, remove, withhold

derive

receive, take

derogatory

damaging, slighting

descend

go down

designate

appoint, name, pick, assign, select

desire

wish, want

detailed

more, full

deteriorate

run down, grow worse

determination

ruling

determine

decide, figure, find

detrimental

harmful

develop

grow, make, take place

dialogue, dialog

talk, discussion

dichotomy

split, separation

difficult

hard

dimension

size

diminish

drop, lessen, reduce, decrease

disadvantage

drawback, handicap

disallow

reject, deny, refuse

disclose

show, reveal, make known

discontinue

drop, stop, end

disseminate

issue, send, pass out, spread, announce

distribute

spread, share, allot

divulge

make known, reveal

donate

give

downward adjustment

decrease

due in large measure

because, due to

INSTEAD OF

TRY

due to the fact that

because of, hence, since, due to

duplicate

copy

duration

time, period

during such time

while

during the periods

when

echelon

level, grade, rank

edifice

building

educator

teacher, trainer

effect (verb)

make, cause, bring about

effect an improvement

improve

effectuate

carry out, put into effect

elaborate (on)

expand on, develop

elapsed (time has)

passed

elect

choose, pick

elementary

simple, basic

elevated

height, altitude

elicit

draw out, bring out, prompt, cause

eliminate

cut, drop, end, remove, omit, delete

elimination

removal, discarding, omission

elucidate

explain, clarify

emanates

emits, comes from, gives out

emphasize

stress, point out

employ

use

enable

let

encompass in

include, enclose

encounter

meet, find, meeting

encourage

urge, promote, favor, persuade

end product

result, product, outcome

end result

end, result, outcome

endeavor

try, effort, action

enhance

increase, raise, heighten, improve

ensue

follow, result

ensure

make sure, see that

enumerate

count, list

envisage

picture, view, have in mind, regard

equally as

equanimity

poise, balance

equitable

fair, just

equivalent

equal

eradicate

wipe out, remove, destroy, erase

erroneous

wrong, mistaken

especially

chiefly

essential

basic, necessary, vital, important

establish

set up, prove, show, make, set, fix

estimate

conclude, appraise, judge

evaluate

check, rate, test, measure, analyze,

price

evaluation

rating

eventuate

result

every effort will be

made

(I/you/we/they) will try

everybody, everyone

each, all

evidence

fact

evidenced

showed

evident

clear, plain, obvious

evince

show, display, express

evolution

change, growth

exacerbate

to make more severe, worse, or bitter

examination

checkup, test, check, search,

questioning

examine

check, look at or into, test, study,

inspect

exceed

go beyond, surpass

exceedingly

notable, extremely, very

excessive

too much, too many

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execute

sign, perform, do act

exercise (authority)

use

exhaustive

thorough, complete

exhibit

show, display

exigency

urgent demand, urgent need, emergency

exorbitant

too much, abnormal

expedite

hurry, rush, speed up, fast, quick,

hasten

expeditious

fast, quick, prompt, speedy; exercise

care, watch out, take care, use care

expend

pay out, spend, use

expendable

used up, consumed, replaceable

expenditure

(see “expense”)

expense

cost, fee, price, loss, charges

experience indicates

experience shows, learned

experiment

test, try, trial

expertise

expert opinion, skill, knowledge

explain

show, tell

expostulate

demand, discuss, object

extant

existing, current

extend

spread, stretch

extensive

large, wide

extenuating

qualifying, justifying

external

outer

extinguish

quench, put out

fabricate

construct, make, build, invent

facilitate

ease, help along, make easy, further, aid

factor

reason, cause

failed to

did not

familiarity

knowledge

familiarize

inform, learn, teach

fatuous numskull

jerk

feasible

possible, can be done, workable,

practical

females

women

final

last

finalize

complete, finish, conclude, end

firstly

first

foe

enemy

for example

such as

for the purpose of

for, to

for the reason that

because, since

for this reason

for your information

(usually not needed)

forfeit

give up, lose

formulate

make, devise, repair

forthcoming

coming, future, approaching

forthwith

at once, right away

fortuitous

by chance, lucky, fortunate

forward

send

fragment

piece, part

frequently

often

fullest possible extent

as much as possible, fully

function

act, role, work

fundamental

basic, main, primary

furnish

give, send, provide, supply

furthermore

besides, also

future date

sometime, later

gained from

obtained, learned, source

gainsay

deny, dispute, contradict

generate

produce

germane

relevant, fitting, related

give consideration to

consider

give encouragement to

encourage, urge (see “encourage”)

give feedback

respond

give instructions to

instruct, direct

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give rise to

raise, cause, bring about

goes without saying

(unnecessary)

govern

rule

habituate

accustom, make use to, adapt, adjust

has the ability

can

has the capability

can

has the capability of

is capable of, can, is able to

have the need for

need

have to

must, need to

held a meeting

met

henceforth

until now

hereby

by this

herein

here (often unnecessary)

heretofore

until now

hiatus

gap, lapse

higher degree of

hitherto

up to now, until now

hold in abeyance

suspend, delay, wait

homogeneity

unity, agreement, consensus

hopefully

I hope

however

but

identical

same

identification

name, designation

identify

find, name, show, point out, recognize

if and when

if, when (not both)

ilk

sort, kind

illustrate

show, make clear

immediately

at once, now, promptly, quickly

imminent

near

impact

affect (verb), effect (noun)

impacted

affected, changed, hit

impediment

block, barrier

imperative

urgent

impetus

drive, power, force

implement

carry out, do, follow, complete, fulfill

implication

impact meaning, effect

important

major, greater, main

impugn

assail, attack, criticize

impulse

drive, push, thrust

in a manner similar to

like, in the same way, as

in a number of cases

some, often, at times

in a position to

can

in a satisfactory

manner

satisfactorily

in a situation in which

when

in accordance with

by, under, per, according to (AFI XX-

XXX, commander’s order, law)

in addition to

also, besides, too, plus

in an effort to

to, so that, so

in case of

in close proximity

near, nearby, close

in compliance with the

as directed, as requested, request

in conjunction with

with, together

in connection with

in, with, on, about

in favor of

for

in its entirety

all of it

in lieu of

instead of, in place of

in order that

for, so, so that

in order to

in process of

preparation

being prepared

in recent past

lately

in reference to

regarding, about, on, concerning

in regard to

about, concerning, on

in relation to

about, concerning, on

in respect to

regarding, about, concerning, on

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in sufficient time

early or soon enough, ahead of time

in the amount of

for, of

in the course of

during, in, when

in the event of

in the event that

if, in case

in the immediate future

soon

in the majority of

instances

most cases or most times

in the matter of

in, on

in the nature of

in the near future

soon

in the negative

no, denied, disapproved

in the neighborhood

about, around

in the time of

during

in the vicinity of

near, around

in view of

since

in view of the above

so, since, therefore

in view of the fact

because, as

in this day and age

today, nowadays

in this instance

here (often necessary)

in-depth

(avoid if possible) thorough, complete

inaccurate

wrong, incorrect

inadvertently

accidentally, mistakenly

inasmuch as

since, because

inaugurate

start, begin, open

inception

start, beginning

incident to

pertaining, connected with

incidental

related, by chance

incombustible

fireproof, (it) will not burn

incorporate

blend, join, merge, include, combine,

add

increase

rise, grow, enlarge, add to

increment

increase, gain, amount

incumbent upon

must

indebtedness

debt

indefinite

vague, uncertain

indeterminate

vague, uncertain

indicate

show, write down, call for, point out

indication

sign, evidence

individual (noun)

person, member

individually

each, one at a time, singly

ineffectual

futile, useless, ineffective

inexpensive

cheap, low-priced

infinite

endless

inflammable

(it) burns, flammable, burnable

inherent

basic, natural

inimical

hostile, unfriendly, opposed

initial (adjective)

first

initially

first, at first

initiate

start, begin, act

innate

basic, native, inborn

innuendo

hint

input (provide)

data, thoughts, advise, respond

insignificant

slight, trivial, unimportant

insofar as

since, for, because

insomuch as

since

instance

case, example

instantaneously

instantly, at once, suddenly

institute (verb)

set up, start

integrate

combine

interface

connect, talk, coordinate, join, work

together, merge, joint, point of contact,

frontier, junction, common boundary

interpose no objection

do not object

interpose objections to

disapprove, disagree, object, non-

concur

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interpret

grasp, explain, understand

interrogate

question

investigate

examine, study

irrespective

regardless

is dependent upon

depends on

is in receipt of

receives, got

is responsible for

obtaining

obtains

is responsible for

selection

selects

is symptomatic of

shows

it is

(leave out)

it is essential

must

it is important to note

note

it is obvious that

clearly, obviously

it is possible that

may, possibly

it is recommended

I, we recommend

it is requested

please, request

jeopardize

endanger

jurisdictional authority

control

justification

grounds, reasons

justify

prove

juxtaposition (in)

alongside, next to

knowledge

experienced, well-trained

legislation

law

limitations

limits

limited number

few

locate

find

location

place, scene, site

magnitude

size, extent

maintain (maintenance)

keep, support (upkeep)

majority

greatest, longest, most

make a decision

decide

make a reply

make a request

request, ask for

make a statement

state

make an adjustment

adjust, resolve

make every effort

try

make provisions for

provide, do

mandatory

must, required

manifest (to be)

clear, plain

manufacture

make, build

materialize

appear, take form

materially

greatly

maximal

highest, greatest

maximize

increase

maximum

most, greatest

meets with approval

is approved

mention

refer to

metamorphosis

change

minimal

least, lowest, smallest

minimize

decrease, lessen, reduce

minimum

least. lowest, small

mitigate

lessen, ease

mode

way, style

modify

change, moderate, qualify

monitor

check, watch, oversee, regulate

multitudinous

populous, large (crowd)

more specifically

for example

most unique

unique

negligible

small, trifling

neophyte

new, novice

nevertheless

however, even so, but

nebulous

vague

necessitate

cause, need, make, require, cause to be

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not infrequently

often

not later than

by, before

not often

seldom

notwithstanding the

fact

although, nonetheless, nevertheless

notification

announcement, report, warning

notify

let know, tell

numerous

many, most

objective

aim, goal

obligate, obligatory

bind, compel

observe

see

obtain

get

obviate

prevent, remove, rule out

obvious

plain, clear

of great importance

important

of large dimensions

large, big, enormous

of late

lately

of no avail

useless, no use

of the opinion (to be)

to believe, think

often times

often

on account of

because

on behalf of

by, for, representing

on the basis of

based on

on the grounds that

because

on the part of

for

operate

run, work

operation

action, performance

operational

working

optimize

improve, strengthen

optimum

greatest, most favorable, best

option

choice, way

opus

work

organization

makeup, work site

orifice

hole, vent, mouth

originate

start, create, begin

outlook

view

outstanding (debt)

unpaid, unresolved

over the signature of

signed by

overlook

view, sight

parameters

limits, factors, boundaries

paramount

superior, supreme, principal, chief

partake

share, take part in

participate

take part

particularize

(avoid using) details, specifies, itemize

patently

evidently

peculiar to

unusual

penitentiary

prison

per annum

each year, a year

perform

do, act, produce, complete, finish

period of time

period, time

periodic

cyclic, recurring

periphery

confines, limits, perimeter

permit

let

pernicious

deadly, harmful

personnel

people, staff

pertaining to

about, of, on

pertinent

to the point

peruse

read, study

phenomenon

fact, event

pictured

shown, imagined

place

put

plaudits

praise, applause, approval

plethora

excess, too much

point in time

time, now, then

point of view

(usually unnecessary)

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portend

predict, mean

portent

sign, omen

portion

part, share, lot

position

place

positively

(often unnecessary)

possess

have, own

posterior

end, rear

postpone

put off, delay

postulate (verb)

claim, assert, suggest

posture (on an issue)

view, position, attitude

potential (adjective)

possible

practicable

possible, workable

practically (done)

almost, nearly

precept

order, command, principle, rule of

action

precipitate (adjective)

rash, sudden, hasty, abrupt

preclude

prevent, shut out

predicament

fix, dilemma

predicated on

based on

predominant

dominant, main, chief

predominantly

mainly, chiefly, mostly

preeminent

chief, outstanding, foremost, first

preliminary to

before

premier

first, leading

preparatory to

before

prepared

ready

preponderantly

mainly, chiefly

presently

now, soon

preserve

keep

prevail upon

persuade

prevalent

widespread

primary

first, chief

prime

best

prior to

before

previous to

before

previously

before

probability

chance, likelihood

problematical

doubtful

procedures

rules, ways

prioritize

rank, order, organized

preventative

preventive

earlier, past

proceed

do, go on, try

procure

get, gain

proficiency

skill, ability

profound

deep

programmed

planned

prohibit

prevent, forbid

project (ed) (verb)

planned

promulgate

announce, issue, set forth

proportion

share, part, size, amount

proposal

plan, offer

prototype

first or original, model, pattern

provide

give, say, supply, furnish

provide for

care for

provided that

provides guidance for

guides

provisions (of a law)

terms

proximity

nearness, distance

purchase

buy

purport

claim, mean

pursuant to

comply with, in, under, per, according

purvey

supply, provide, sell

purview

range, scope

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quantify

count, measure, state the amount

rationale

reason

reach a decision

decide

reason for

why

reason is because

because

recapitulate

sum up, summarize, report

recipient

receiver

recommend

propose, suggest, advance

recommendation

advice, thought, counsel, opinion

reduce

cut

referred to as

called, named

reflect

show, say

regarding

about, of, on

regardless

in spite of, no matter

reimbursement

payment, repayment

reiterate

repeat

related with

on, about

relating to

about, on

relative to

on, about, for

relocation

move

remain

stay

remainder

the rest, what remains

remedy

cure

remittance

payment

remove

take away, take off, move

remuneration

pay, payment

render

give, make, report

repeat again

repeat, do again

replete

full, filled

represent

stand for, depict

reproduce,

reproduction

copy

request

ask, please

require

must, need, call for

requirement

need

requisite

needed

reside

live

retain

keep

return

go back

review

check, go over

rudiments

first steps, basics

salient

main, important

salutary

good, healthy

sans

without

satisfactory

fine, good, good enough

saturate

soak, fill

scant

little, only

scrupulous

careful

scrutinize

study carefully, look into

segment

part

seldom ever

seldom

selection

choice

serves to

acts, helps, works

significance

meaning, point, importance

significant

main, great, major, marked,

signify

mean, show (verb)

similar to

sine qua non

essential

situated

placed, located, work assignment, state

small in size

small

so as to

solicit

ask for

solitary

lone, single

somewhat

(usually padding)

specifications

terms, details, conditions

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specify

list

square in shape

square

state (verb)

say

statutory

legal

still remains

remains

stimulate

stir, arouse

stipend

salary, payment, fee

strict accuracy

accuracy

subordinate (verb)

to lower, subdue

subordinate commands

their commands

subsequent to

after, later, next

submit

offer, give, send

substantial

large, real, strong, much, solid

substantiate

prove, support

substitute (verb)

replace

succor

help, aid

succumb

die, yield

such

similar, like

such as

like, that is

sufficient

enough, ample

subsequently

after, later, then, next

stringent

tight, strict

subject

the, this, your

subject to examination

check, examine, verify

sufficiently in advance

early enough

sum total

sum, total

superfluous

extra, too much, useless

supervise

manage

supposition

belief, thought, idea

surmise

think, guess, suppose

susceptible to

open to, subject to

symptom

sign

synthesis

merging, combining

synthesize

put together, group, assemble

tabulation

table

take action

act

take appropriate action

please

take necessary action

act

take necessary steps

technicality

detail, fine point

technique

way, method

tender (verb)

offer, give

tentative

uncertain

terminate

end, stop

terrible disaster

disaster

that

(leave out)

that aforesaid

(usually unnecessary) given or said

above

the fact that

(usually unnecessary) that

the following

this, these

the foregoing

these, those, (something) above

the fullest degree

possible

fully, as much as possible

the provisions of

(leave out)

the question as to

whether

the undersigned desires

I want

the use of

(leave out)

thence

from there

therapy

treatment

there are

(leave out)

there is

(leave out)

thereafter

after that, afterwards, then

thereby

by that, by it

therefore

therein

in (usually unnecessary)

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thereof

of, its, their

thereon

on (usually unnecessary)

thereto

to that, to it

thereupon

at once

thirdly

third

this office

us, we

this point in time

now

thither

there

through the use of

by, with

thus

thwart

frustrate, block, stop, hinder

time period or

time frame

time, period, span

timely basis

promptly, fast, quickly

to be aware of

know

to effectively direct

to direct

to the extent that

as far as, so much that

transcend

go beyond

transformation

change

transmit

send

transparent

clear

transpire

happen, occur

transport

carry, move

transverse

crosswise

trauma

shock

true facts

facts

type

(leave out)

ultimate

final, end

ultimately

in the end, finally

under advisement

(avoid) being considered

under separate cover

(usually necessary)

underprivileged

poor, deprived

understand

know

unintentionally

by mistake, mistakenly, accidentally

until such time as

until, when

upgrade

improve

upon

upward adjustment

raise, increase

usage

use

utilize, utilization

use, employ

validate

confirm

value

cost, worth

variation

change

velocity

speed

vend

sell

verbatim

word for word, exact

veritable

(padding—usually unnecessary)

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very

(usually unnecessary)

very far

distant, remote

very hot

torrid, scorching, fiery

very large

enormous, immense, huge, spacious,

vast

very last

last

very least

least

very near

adjacent, close

very pretty

gorgeous, beautiful

very quiet

still, silent

very small

tiny, puny

very strong

powerful, potent, forceful

very stupid

dense, moronic, idiotic, stupid

very weak

exhausted, frail, flimsy, inadequate

via

in, on, though, by way of

viable

workable, capable of growing

vicinity of

close, near

vicissitudes

ups and downs, changes, difficulties

vie

compete

virtually

almost

visualize

see, imagine, picture

vitiate

weaken, spoil, impair, debase

voluminous

bulky, large

warrant

call for, permit

whence

from where

whenever

when, each time

whereas

since, while

whereby

by which

wherein

in which, where

wherever

where

wherewithal

means

whether or not

whether, if

will be effected

will be done

will make use of

will use

with a view to

to, for

with due regard for, or to)

for, to

with reference to

on, about

with regard to

about, on, regarding, concerning

with the exception of

except, except for, but

with the purpose of

with the result that

within the purview of

under

withstand

stand, resist

witnessed

saw

We’ve been looking a lot at how to use the right word for the job to write clear and concise

sentences. Before we leave this section on effective sentence writing, there are two more areas

we need to cover that have an impact on readability—sentence length and using questions.

Sentence Length

The purpose of words on paper is to transfer thoughts in the simplest manner with the greatest

clarity. You should avoid long, complicated sentences over 20 words (average is 17 words).

Break up long, stuffy sentences by making short sentences of dependent clauses or by using lists.

Short sentences increase the pace; long ones usually retard it. The key is to vary your pattern

since constant use of either form can be monotonous.

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AFH 337, 27 MAY 2015

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Using Questions

Use questions now and then to call attention to what you want. You’re actually reaching out to

your reader when a sentence ends with a question mark. In a longer communication, a question

can definitely be a welcome change.

Overcoming Writer’s Block

Earlier we mentioned writer’s block. If you occasionally suffer from writer’s block, you’re not

alone—writer’s block can affect even experienced writers. First, a definition: writer’s block is a

temporary inability to get words on paper (or on the computer). Like many other problems, it

has a life cycle—denial, despair, acceptance and recovery. Recognizing this cycle and the

causes of writer’s block (fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of success, fear of offending and

fear of running out of ideas) are the first steps to overcoming it.

In most cases we just need a gentle nudge to get us back on track. In her book The Complete

Idiot’s Guide to Creative Writing, Laurie E. Rozakis provides several suggestions on how to

overcome writer’s block. Here are some of her ideas, as well as some of our own:

• Brainstorm or “free write” to get your creative juices flowing. Spill your brains and don’t

worry about punctuation—just get it down. Stay close to your outline; don’t revise or

polish. If your outline is comprehensive, you may only need to string the ideas together

with brief transitions. If your outline is a series of key words in a logical pattern, you’ll

have to fill in the larger blanks.

• Start wherever you want. Write the introduction last as many writers do. The key here is

to just start writing. Try starting with the part that’s easiest to write.

• On a similar note, try writing just the topic sentences for each paragraph. Once you do

this, the other support sentences will start really flowing.

• Avoid procrastination. Waiting until the last minute just increases your “blockage”!

• Forget about page length, word count or other constraint. Work these when you edit.

• Tell your ideas to a friend.

• Briefly do some mindless activity—but only briefly!

• Try changing your writing mode (computer to hand-written and vice versa).

• Use visual aids. This can help ignite your ideas and thoughts. Then, you can write them.

• Develop rituals or routines to get in the mood for writing.

• If you work in a noisy area, try using earplugs to cut down on noise and distractions.

SUMMARY: Congratulations! The most difficult task is over—you’ve successfully written the

first draft. Take a break and step back from your draft. When you come back, you’ll be ready to

revise and edit it. Perhaps more significantly, you’ve overcome writer’s block if you have a

draft. Writer’s block is temporary and curable: there are lots of ways to overcome it.

Hopefully, the tips here will help you. Always remember—writing should be fun, not

frightening!

CHAPTER 8:

Step 6 (Edit)

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CHAPTER 8:

Step 6

(Edit)

This chapter covers:

• Editing vs. Feedback

• Editing Fundamentals

• Editing Efficiently: A Three-Step Approach

• Drafting Basics: Do You Apply Them?

• Common Grammar Traps

• Common Writing Errors

Spotting problems in our own writing is not easy. Many of us take great pride in what we write.

Once our words are on paper, we resent the suggestion that something could be wrong. We

don’t like to check and change the words, the organization, the limits of the subject, the spelling,

the punctuation or anything else, and we often have trouble taking the time to edit properly.

Yet editing is critical. Take the time to make sure you have a cohesive, clear, error-free product

that the audience can relate to. Here’s the good news: if you completed the steps described in

chapters 3-7, the editing will be a lot easier … and at this point, you’re almost home free.

When you revise from the top down, from global structure to paragraphs to

sentences to words, you are more likely to discover useful revisions than if you

start at the bottom with words and sentences and work up.

–The Craft of Research

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Editing vs. Feedback

First, it is important to understand the difference between editing (step 6) versus feedback

(step 7). The “Seven Steps for Effective Communication,” recommends that you edit your own

writing before asking for feedback from someone else. There are many reasons to do this. For

one, it develops your own editing skills—you’ll be better prepared for those times when you

don’t have access to a second opinion. Second, it shows respect for the people you’re seeking

feedback from. Why should someone else invest time and effort to improve your writing if you

aren’t willing to do so yourself? Finally, you’ll catch the worst mistakes and avoid embarrassing

yourself in front of your coworkers. It never hurts to put the most professional product you can

out for review, even if the review is an informal one. In this chapter, we’ll assume it’s just you

and your draft. In chapter 9, we’ll talk more about seeking feedback from others.

FOCUS Principles for Strong Writing and Speaking

Focused: Address the issue, the whole issue, and nothing but the issue.

Organized: Systematically present your information and ideas.

Clear: Communicate with clarity and make each word count.

Understanding: Understand your audience and its expectations.

Supported: Use logic and support to make your point.

Knowing the difference between editing and feedback is the easy part. The hard part is

determining your editing goal. Remember the FOCUS principles from chapter 1? Good editing

all relates to those principles and will tell you how well you followed the steps for effective

writing. As you read through this chapter on editing, keep FOCUS in mind.

Editing Fundamentals

When you edit, there are a few key rules to remember:

1. Edit With Fresh Eyes.

Give yourself time between drafting and editing. By that we mean put the draft on a shelf, in a

desk drawer or under a paperweight and let it sit a spell, preferably for several hours for shorter

projects and at least a day for longer ones. After this down time you’ll come back fresh and will

be more likely to catch errors.

2. Review the Basics.

Take the time to review earlier sections on writing tone, drafting clear and concise sentences,

common grammatical errors, and any other material that represents a problem area for you.

Editing is your last chance to apply the guidelines you’ve read about in earlier chapters. If the

concepts are fresh in your mind when you start editing, you’ll be better able to spot problems in

your draft.

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3. Slow Down and Take Your Time.

You aren’t in a race. If you read at your normal pace, you’re more likely to miss errors. Try

different approaches to slow yourself down, including reading aloud and reading one line at a

time using a “cover” to hide the rest of the page. If you’re checking for misspelled words, move

backwards through a sentence.

4. Remember Your Readers.

Try to put yourself in the role of your audience as you edit. You may catch some areas that may

need revision if you read it from their perspective and knowledge base. Also consider your

secondary audience—even if you’ve got your primary audience targeted correctly, are you

unnecessarily insulting others that may end up reading this?

5. Start With the Big Picture

Start large and then work down to the details. When you begin to edit, don’t focus in on the

nitty-gritty—look at the big picture first. Misuse of “there” and “their” is really not that

important if your paper lacks cohesion, is poorly organized or fails to include a clear purpose

statement. Again, anyone can use spellchecker, but a well-edited paper requires much more and

begins with The Big Picture.

Editing Efficiently: A Three-Step Approach

One way to make sure you edit efficiently is to read your document at least three times to allow

yourself to really look hard at the problem areas that could botch your product. In the first pass,

look at the big picture; in the second pass, look at paragraph construction; and in the third pass

look at sentences, phrases and words.

First Pass: The Big Picture

In this first “go around” you should pay attention to the arrangement and flow of ideas. Here are

some areas to think about:

Review: Elements of an Introduction

In chapter 7 we described how an introduction often begins with optional stage-

setting remarks that grab the reader’s attention. The introduction should

include your purpose statement, which informs the reader where you are

going and why you are going there. The introduction often contains an

overview of the main point(s) covered in the body. These are just guidelines:

the composition of an introduction should be tailored to the assignment.

Check Your Tasking and Purpose.

• What was my original task? Check the wording one more time.

• What is my purpose statement? For short drafts, underline it in your draft. For longer

projects, write it on a separate sheet of paper and refer to it frequently while editing.

• Does the purpose statement “answer the task,” or does it miss the point?

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Check Your Introduction.

• Does it exist and does it contain my purpose statement?

• Is it an appropriate length? (typically one paragraph long for assignments)

• Does my purpose statement and introduction give the readers a good idea of what they

are about to read?

Compare Your Introduction and Conclusion.

• First read your introduction and then read your conclusion.

• Do they sound like they go together without being identical? Does the introduction

declare your purpose and does your conclusion show your readers you’ve accomplished

your purpose?

• Do you let your readers down gradually? Or do you stop with a jerk?

• Does the conclusion sum up your point? Don’t introduce any new ideas here—you’ll

leave your readers hanging in limbo!

Check Overall Page Count and Length.

• What are my audience’s expectations regarding page count? Am I on target? Will I have

to make this draft significantly longer or shorter?

• Check the scope and flow of paragraphs in your body.

Check for Relevance and Completeness.

• Do the paragraphs clearly relate to the thesis statement?

• Are some paragraphs irrelevant or unnecessary?

• Am I missing any main points in this written communication?

• Are paragraphs arranged in a consistent order?

Second Pass: Paragraph Structure and Clarity

After your first pass, you know the paper contains what it needs to do the job. In the second

pass, check that the main points and supporting ideas are appropriately organized in paragraphs.

Let’s take a close look at individual paragraphs in the body of your writing. For each paragraph,

ask the following questions:

Unity of Focus

• Is there one, and only one, main point of the paragraph?

• Is all the information in the paragraph related enough to be in the same paragraph?

• Can you identify the central idea of each paragraph?

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Topic Sentence

• Does the paragraph have a topic sentence—one sentence that captures the central idea of

the paragraph?

• Is the topic sentence the first sentence of the paragraph? (Or, if you’re starting with a

transitional sentence, the second sentence?)

Supporting Ideas

• Do sentences expand, clarify, illustrate and explain points mentioned or suggested in each

main idea? Your goal is to smoothly lead the reader, step-by-step, to each main idea.

• Are there enough details in the paragraph to support the central idea?

• Are there any “extra sentences” that seem to be irrelevant to the main point?

• Do all transitional words, phrases, and clauses improve the flow and show proper

relationships?

• Do most paragraphs contain three to seven sentences?

If you did a lot of rearranging of paragraphs in this step, try the organizational editing check on

the previous page—just to make sure you’re on track.

• How does your draft compare with your original outline?

Organizational Editing Check

Some writers can write powerful and clear sentences but have trouble keeping

“on target” throughout the document. Their editing challenge isn’t grammar;

it’s the big picture. If this sounds like you, try this simple editing check.

This editing check assumes you followed the paragraph construction guidelines

previously covered and placed the topic sentence at the beginning of each

paragraph.

Read out loud. Read these sections out loud: 1) Your complete introduction;

2) The first sentence of each paragraph in the body, in order of appearance; and

3) Your complete conclusion.

Does it answer the question?

Does it stay on message?

Does it flow well?

Third Pass: Sentences, Phrases, and Words

Now you’re ready to look at the details. Though you’ve probably corrected some minor errors in

the first two passes, now is the time to really concentrate on the “small stuff” that can sabotage

your communication: passive voice, unclear language, excessive wordiness, grammatical errors

and spelling mistakes. Some of these concepts were covered in the chapter on drafting, while

others will be introduced in this section.

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Let’s start with some general advice. Read the paper out loud. Reading the paper out loud will

increase your chances of catching errors because it requires you to slow down and use two

senses—seeing and hearing. What one sense misses, the other may pick up.

Listen to the sound of words, phrases and sentences. Remember, the quicker your audience can

read and understand it, the better. If you have to read a sentence two or three times, chances are

they will too. Not good! Re-write the sentence to enhance its clarity.

Another helpful piece of advice is to read one line at a time using a “cover” to hide the rest of the

page. This procedure helps provide the focus you need to check your sentence structure and

individual word usage: subject-verb agreements and identifying homonyms (for example,

“their” and “there.”) Moving backwards through a sentence can also identify other misspelled

words.

Drafting Basics: Did You Apply Them?

As part of your editing step, you need to check some of the same concepts discussed in the

previous chapter on drafting. Remember these guidelines, and refer back to the referenced pages

if you need more details or additional examples.

1. Write in Active Voice.

In active voice, the subject comes first in the sentence. In passive voice, the “doer” or subject of

the sentence shows up late in the sentence or is missing entirely. Avoid overusing passive voice;

it often creates lengthy and confusing sentences.

Passive: Captain Smith was given a choice assignment by his career field monitor.

Active: The career field monitor gave Captain Smith a choice assignment.

2. Avoid Smothered Verbs.

Use one specific verb instead of a general verb and extra words.

Smothered: This directive is applicable to everyone who makes use of the system.

Better: This directive applies to everyone who uses the system.

3. Check for misspelled or commonly misused words. In today’s computer age, your

software’s spell checker is your first line of defense against misspelled words. Still, you can get

into trouble by misusing synonyms or easily confused words like “there” and “their” and

“accept” and “except.” Spell check will not flag these words because they are spelled correctly,

but used in the wrong context. When in doubt, check the dictionary.

4. Use parallel construction (parallelism) in lists and series. Use a similar grammatical

construction within a list or series. Make items of equal importance look equal. If one starts

with a verb, start the other with a verb. If three items in a list are commands, make the fourth a

command. Parallelism helps make sentences clear.

Needs work: Remember the following when editing: write in active voice, parallelism,

smothered verbs should be avoided, and spelling.

Better: Remember the following when editing: write in active voice, use parallel

construction in lists, avoid smothered verbs, and check for misspelled words.

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5. Avoid unnecessary redundancy and word doublings.

Don’t use one word to modify another unless both add value.

Needs work: Repetitive redundancy hurts readability.

Better: Redundancy hurts readability.

Don’t use two nearly identical words unless both add value.

Needs work: We must comply with the standards and criteria for controlling and reducing

environmental pollution.”

Better: We must comply with the standards for reducing environmental pollution.”

Common Grammar Traps

Grammatical errors can confuse your readers and undermine the credibility of your

communication. We’ve listed some of the most common mistakes below—look out for them

when editing your work.

1. Misplaced Modifiers

A modifier is a group of words that describes another group of words within the sentence.

Modifiers should be placed near the words they describe. Improperly placed modifiers can

create ambiguity or imply an illogical relationship. There are two kinds of misplaced modifiers:

dangling and ambiguous.

a. Dangling modifiers literally hang illogically on sentences, usually at the beginning.

They are placed so they seem to modify the wrong word and, thus, show an illogical

relationship. To correct a dangling modifier, either place the modifier next to the word it

modifies or change the subject of the sentence to clarify your intent.

Confusing: Approaching the flight line from the east side, the operations building can be

easily spotted by a pilot. [The operations building does not approach the flight line—the

pilot does!]

Better: A pilot approaching the flight line from the east side can easily spot the

operations building.

Confusing: To make a climbing turn, the throttle is opened wider. [The throttle doesn’t

make a climbing turn.]

Better: To make a climbing turn, open the throttle wider. [The subject “you” is

understood.]

b. Ambiguous modifiers seem to modify two different parts of a sentence. Readers can’t

tell whether they modify words that come before or after them. To correct an ambiguous

modifier, place the word so its relationship can’t be misinterpreted.

Confusing: People who drive to work occasionally can expect to find a parking space.

Better: People who occasionally drive to work can expect to find a parking space.

Confusing: Although working conditions improved slowly employees grew dissatisfied.

Better: Although working conditions slowly improved, employees grew dissatisfied.

[Case #1: the conditions improved slowly]

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Better: Although working conditions improved, employees slowly grew dissatisfied.

[Case #2: employee morale dropped slowly]

2. Errors in Subject-Verb Agreement

Plural subjects take plural verbs and singular subjects take singular verbs. Another way to

state this rule using grammatical terms is “Subjects and verbs must agree in number.”

The key to avoiding most problems in subject-verb agreement is to identify the subject of a

sentence, determine whether it’s singular or plural, and then choose a verb in the same number

and keep it near its subject.

Generally subjects that end in s are plural, while verbs that end in s are singular. (There are

exceptions to this rule—for example, the word ballistics is singular.)

a. Phrases between the subject and verb do not change the requirement that the verb must

agree in number with its subject.

An inspection team consisting of 36 people is investigating that problem.

A general, accompanied by 3 colonels and 15 majors, is attending the conference.

b. A linking verb agrees with its subject, not with its complement.

The commander’s main problem is untrained Airmen.

Untrained airmen are the commander’s main problem.

c. A compound subject consists of two or more nouns or pronouns joined by one of these

conjunctions: and, but, or, for or nor. Some compound subjects are plural; others are not.

Here are guidelines for subject-verb agreement when dealing with compound subjects:

If two nouns are joined by and, they typically take a plural verb.

The Air Force and the Army are two components of the nation’s defense forces.

If two nouns are joined by or, nor, or but, the verb should agree in number with the

subject nearest it.

Either the President or his cabinet members are planning to attend.

Either the cabinet members or the President is planning to attend.

Use a singular verb for a compound subject that is preceded by each or every.

Every fighter pilot and his aircraft is ready for the mission.

Each boy and girl brings a snack to school.

Use a singular verb for a compound subject whose parts are considered a single

unit.

The Stars and Stripes was flown at half-mast at the Headquarters building.

Ham and eggs is a delicious breakfast.

d. Use a singular verb with collective nouns (and noun phrases showing quantity) treated as

a unit, but a plural verb when treated as individuals.

The thousand wounded is expected to arrive soon. [A quantity or unit]

A thousand wounded were evacuated by air. [Individuals]

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e. Use singular verbs with most indefinite pronouns: another, anybody, anything, each,

everyone, everybody, everything, neither, nobody, nothing, one, no one, someone, somebody

and something.

Everyone eats at the cafeteria.

The President said everybody was welcome to join.

Everyone in the squadron takes a turn leading a service project.

f. With all, any, none and some, use a singular or plural verb, depending on the content.

All of the money is reserved for emergencies.

[singular-equivalent to “The money is reserved for emergencies.”]

When the men arrive, all go straight to work.

[plural—equivalent to “The men go straight to work”]

All are expected to have a tour of duty overseas.

Grammar Review: Pronouns

Pronouns are words that replace nouns and refer to a specific noun. The noun

being referred to or replaced by the pronoun is called the antecedent. Some

examples:

• SSgt Smith is our nominee for the award and he has a good chance of

winning. [SSgt Smith is the antecedent; he is a pronoun replacing the noun

later in the sentence.]

• Three lieutenants arrived late to the meeting. Their boss was not happy

with them. [Three lieutenants is the antecedent; Their and them are

pronouns replacing the antecedent in the next sentence.]

3. Errors in Pronoun Reference (“Pronoun-Antecedent Agreement”)

A common error in pronoun use involves agreement in number. If the noun is singular, the

pronoun is singular. If the noun is plural, the pronoun should be plural, too.

Let’s look at an example of an incorrect pronoun reference:

Incorrect: Everyone should bring their books to class.

[Everyone is singular, while their is plural.]

When correcting such a sentence, try for gender inclusive language. Often the best approach is

to make the subject plural and keep the pronoun unchanged:

Correct: All students should bring their books to class.

Of course, using his or her is also acceptable, but it gets cumbersome when overused:

Also correct: Everyone should bring his or her books to class.

With a compound subject joined by and, use a plural pronoun:

My advisor and I can’t coordinate our schedules. [our is a plural pronoun]

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When parts of an antecedent are joined by “or” or “nor,” make the pronoun agree with the

nearest part:

John or Steve should have raised his hand.

Neither the student nor his roommates will have their deposit returned.

Avoid awkward phrasing by placing the plural part second if one part of the antecedent is

singular and one part is plural.

Awkward: Neither my parents nor my sister has stayed on her diet.

Better: Neither my sister nor my parents have stayed on their diet.

Remember that embedded descriptive phrases can be tricky:

Incorrect: He is one of those ambitious people who values promotion over personal

ethics. [Values should be value because the pronoun who refers to people, not one.

Clarification: he is one, but not the only one, of many ambitious people.]

Here are some other examples of incorrect pronoun reference:

The Air Force maintains different types of numbered forces, but the organization of

its headquarters is similar. [Its should be their to refer correctly to types.]

The committee plans to submit their report by the end of the month. [Their should be

its because committee functions as a single unit in this sentence.]

4. Comma Placement around Parenthetical Expressions

There are many rules about using commas to punctuate sentences, and we recommend you check

out Appendix 1 for the complete list. One class of common mistakes is nearly universal and

worth covering in this chapter—placement of commas around groups of words that interrupt the

sentence’s flow. Here’s the basic rule:

Enclose nonrestrictive or parenthetical expressions with commas.

What does this mean? If an expression (a group of words) can be removed from the sentence

without changing its meaning, then enclose the expression with commas.

Though the rule is simple, applying the rule requires some judgment. Advocates of open

punctuation would argue that if the group of words does not “significantly” interrupt the

sentence, you don’t need commas. Another judgment area is deciding which expressions are

restrictive and which are nonrestrictive. A restrictive expression limits or restricts the meaning

of the words it applies to, so it can’t be removed from the sentence without changing the

meaning. A nonrestrictive expression merely adds additional information. Here’s the bottom

line: If you can remove the expression from the sentence without changing the meaning, it is a

nonrestrictive expression that should be enclosed by commas.

Which punctuation is correct?

1. People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.

2. People, who live in glass houses, shouldn’t throw stones.

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Answer #1 is correct. The expression who live in glass houses is restrictive. If you eliminate it,

the sentence changes meaning: People shouldn’t throw stones.

Which punctuation is correct?

1. My friend the architect who lives in a glass house has a party every year.

2. My friend the architect, who lives in a glass house, has a party every year.

The correct answer depends on your situation. If you are in the Air Force and have one friend

who is an architect, then answer #2 is correct. The expression who lives in a glass house is

nonrestrictive—it provides information that is not essential to the sentence’s meaning, and it can

be removed without impact. On the other hand, if you work in an architecture firm and all your

friends are architects, then answer #1 is correct. In this case the expression identifies which one

of your architect friends has a party every year—it’s the one who lives in a glass house.

Though there’s some judgment involved in deciding if something is nonrestrictive, once you

decide to enclose an expression, don’t forget one of the commas.

Incorrect: The new faculty, including the civilians must show up at 0600 tomorrow for

physical training.

Correct: The new faculty, including the civilians, must show up at 0600 tomorrow for

physical training.

Incorrect: Grammar errors including misplaced commas, inhibit writing clarity.

Correct: Grammar errors, including misplaced commas, inhibit writing clarity.

Grammar can be challenging, but the fixes can be easy, as shown by the examples in the

preceding section. Grammar and writing style can also be humorous (or embarrassing!).

Consider the common writing errors in the next section on as you examine your own writing.

Common Writing Errors

These tips are presented as a humorous means to convey some common errors seen in official

publications/forms and they represent some serious violations of the English language. The

errors are noted in ALL CAPS while comments to think about are in parentheses.

 Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.

 Prepositions are not words to end sentences WITH.

 AND don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.

 It is wrong to EVER SPLIT an infinitive. (Not all style guides agree: where would the

crew of the USS Enterprise go without its famous split infinitive “to boldly go…”?

 Avoid clichés like the plague—they’re old hat. (Double clichés are worse than one.)

 Also, always avoid annoying alliteration. (Alliteration, and other rhetorical devices, have

purpose and add style—what would William Shakespeare’s works be without them?)

 Be more or less specific. (Choose one and stay focused.)

 Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary. (But not always.)

 Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies. (Remember, be concise!)

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 No sentence fragments. (Sentence fragments make poor bullets, too.)

 Foreign words and phrases are not APROPOS. (Perhaps, but they might be appropriate.)

 Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.

 One should NEVER generalize.

 DON’T use NO double negatives.

 Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc. (Better not read your last EPR/OPR.)

 One-word sentences? Eliminate. (Unless you need space on that SSS/eSSS!)

 Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

 Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be

enclosed in commas.

 Never use a big word when substituting a diminutive one would suffice.

 Kill all multiple exclamation points!!!

 Use words correctly, IRREGARDLESS of how others use them. (“irregardless” is not a

word; it is a double negative. The prefix “ir” and the suffix “less” are both negative

resulting in a meaning of “regard” which is the opposite of the intent.)

 Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas.

 Use the apostrophe in IT’S proper place and omit it when ITS not needed.

 Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.

A note on proofreader marks. All of the suggestions in this chapter, and more, can be

conveyed back to you on your draft by proofreader marks. The technical skills of a professional

proofreader are beyond the scope of The Tongue and Quill; however, if you should have a need

to use proofreader marks, either as a writer who sought professional feedback or if you want to

begin using them to provide feedback to others, see The Air University Style and Author Guide

(published as an Air University number text as AU-1) for current standard proofreader marks.

SUMMARY: Always edit! Editing is crucial to producing professional communication.

Without solid editing your writing can be disjointed, your reader becomes confused, and your

message may be lost. Does it take time? Absolutely! Budget time for editing—especially for

time-critical assignments—and with practice the whole process will seem second nature. Editing

isn’t the final step, however. Yes, someone else needs to look at your work of art. Get ready to

put on your thick skin, as this is not for the meek and timid. Read on to the final step to better

communication … how to fight for feedback.

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CHAPTER 9:

Step 7

(Fight for Feedback

and Get Approval)

This chapter covers:

• Fighting for Feedback

• Getting Approval: Staff Coordination

Fighting for feedback and getting approval for your communication are both activities that are

part of life in the Air Force. When you fight for feedback, you voluntarily seek out someone

else’s views on your speaking or writing product. Feedback can be very informal and it doesn’t

have to be from people with impressive job titles. When you get staff approval, you’re going

through a more formal process that allows individuals to review and comment on your

communication product. Feedback and coordination are closely linked: if you do a good job at

fighting for feedback, you’ll find that the coordination process becomes much smoother.

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Fighting For Feedback

Why Fight For Feedback?

So, why should you fight for feedback? Perhaps the biggest benefit is getting a second set of

eyes to review your work. Even the best writers and speakers can become so close to their

projects that they can’t see where they can be made stronger. They may omit vital information,

fail to see a weakness in their argument or just overlook the need for a transition between two

main points. Their closeness to the material and pride of authorship can distort or obscure their

viewpoint. Smart communicators realize this tendency and seek objective feedback from a fresh

set of eyes. If you seek out and listen to feedback, you are much more likely to produce

accurate, understandable communication that “answers the mail” and resonates with your

audience.

Another reason to fight for feedback is that it often saves time during the coordination process.

Whether it’s the staff package you’ve been working hard on for 3 weeks or the briefing you have

to present Friday, getting feedback from someone else’s point of view will help smooth things

out later as your package makes its way up the chain of command. In some cases having

someone review and provide feedback can also be a smart political move—if individuals “buy

in” early in the process, they may be a source of support later if it becomes necessary to defend

the material.

Where Can I Get Feedback?

Meaningful feedback can come from many different sources. Coworkers or fellow staffers may

be a good choice because of their familiarity with the issue and its jargon. They may have also

briefed or written for the same people on similar issues; if so, they can give you some tips or

lessons learned. You may also choose to go to different people for different aspects of your

work. For example, you may find it helpful to solicit suggestions for improving grammar,

organization and content from three different “trusted agents” who are strong in those particular

areas. You may even want to use a trusted agent who’s totally outside your organization to see if

your message makes sense to someone with no clue about the material.

What Kind Of Feedback Should I Ask For?

Once you’ve picked out your feedback sources, you should let them know what kind of feedback

you’re looking for. (We’re not suggesting you say, “Tell me how wonderful this is—I’ve

worked so hard on it!”) Unless you give them clear guidance, reviewers may focus on details

like spelling, grammar and margins. Though these are important, make it clear that you want

feedback on the big picture, too. Here are some examples of items you should ask them to

address:

Is my purpose clear and am I properly targeting my audience? For starters, you want to give

your reviewers a sense of your audience and your purpose. Will the audience positively receive

the message you intend to convey? Ask them to tell you the bottom line they walked away with

after reviewing your material. Was it what you intended?

Did I address the issue at the right level of detail? Too many details can obscure your

message while too few details can lead to confusion, questions and delays. Ask your reviewers if

you’ve addressed the issue(s) without going too far into the weeds. You could also have them

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ask you questions on the material. Have you anticipated possible questions? If you don’t feel

comfortable answering their questions, you may need to go back and do more research. Along

the same lines, reviewers may help you pinpoint inconsistencies or unclear material that your

final audience might find as well.

Are there other viewpoints I need to consider? Finally, your reviewer may offer differing

viewpoints on the material. If that’s the case, ask for clarification on their viewpoint if

necessary, but don’t argue with them. Instead, ask yourself if their ideas may come up again

later. If so, you probably need to address them in your material.

The bottom line to getting feedback is having an open mind and being able to accept criticism.

Don’t take comments personally, even if they seem like attacks to your project. Accept feedback

willingly and use it constructively—it’s part of the process of developing a quality product.

How To Give Feedback

There are certain things to keep in mind when giving feedback. First, effective feedback is

consistent, objective and sensitive to the stated purpose. If someone asks you to review a

package, make sure you understand what the person wants from your review and stick to it.

Second, distinguish between necessary, desirable, and unnecessary changes. A page full of red

marks is hard to interpret. Instead, give the author a sense of what really needs to be changed

versus the “happy to glad” kinds of suggestions. Next, helpful suggestions pinpoint specific

problems, such as awkward sentences, grammar, etc. A general statement like “you need to

work on your sentence structure” isn’t as helpful as underlining specific sentences that need help.

Finally, you should concentrate on improving the message’s content, not the style or personal

preferences of the author (unless the author has asked you specifically to comment on writing

style).

Feedback Philosophy

Feedback should describe rather than judge. Authors are more likely to listen and

incorporate feedback if it’s phrased constructively. Avoid judgmental language—it places

people on the defensive. Remember, feedback should be directed at a person’s work or behavior,

not at the person.

Feedback is both positive and negative. A balanced description of other people’s work takes

both strong and weak points into account. Both types of feedback give useful information to

those people who want to change and improve their work.

Feedback should be specific rather than general. General statements about other people’s

work do not indicate the performance elements they may need to change and the elements that

may serve as models. Highlight or underline specific items you want to bring to the author’s

attention, and make annotations or comments in the margins.

Feedback should consider the needs of both the receiver and the giver of the feedback.

Feedback often reflects the state of mind of the reviewer, not just the quality of the work. If

you’re seeking feedback from someone else, try to pick an appropriate time to make the request

and be realistic about the time required for the review. Similarly, reviewers should make sure

they are in the right frame of mind before analyzing the material and offering feedback.

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Feedback should be directed at behavior the receiver can control. Only frustration results

when people are reminded of shortcomings they cannot control. A suggestion to improve the

briefing room’s temperature, for example, is probably beyond the individual’s control. However,

briefing skills and mannerisms are within the person’s ability to control.

Feedback should be analyzed to ensure clear communication. Discuss or clarify any

feedback you’re not sure of to clear up any misinterpretations. The sender’s intended message is

not always what the receiver hears.

Feedback should be solicited rather than imposed (except for the supervisor-subordinate

situation). Feedback is most useful when the receiver asks for it. The receiver is more likely to

be receptive to your inputs in that case, as opposed to responding with an attitude of “Who asked

you?”

A Word on Supervisor-Subordinate Feedback

As a supervisor, you need to be tactful and patient, especially when approving and disapproving

the communications of subordinates. As a supervisor, you are obligated to help your people

improve their work. This obligation may mean helping them to revise or rewrite their

communication, especially if they are inexperienced. Whatever your role, tact and patience

come more easily to people once they understand feedback in its broadest context.

Getting Approval: Staff Coordination

A formal coordination process gives interested individuals an opportunity to contribute to and

comment on a communication product. Though most staff coordination involves written

products (i.e., “the staff package”), important briefings can also be subjected to a formal review

process. Formal coordination gives affected individuals a chance to comment, and helps ensure

the best course of action is presented to the decision maker. Coordination also lets the decision

maker know who supported or disagreed with the position stated in the paper and who agreed to

take subsequent actions within their areas of responsibility.

Getting a staff package fully coordinated takes a lot of time, diligence, and hard work. The

coordination process has to be closely monitored by the package’s OPR to make sure the

package gets seen by everyone who needs to see it and doesn’t get forgotten in someone’s in-

box. Here are several considerations that may reduce headaches as you work your package up to

the decision maker.

The “Who” of Coordination

One of the first things you need to decide as you get ready to put your package through the

approval process is who needs to see the package.

Check your organization’s policies on coordination. In many organizations, policies exist on

coordination requirements for routine packages: find out if your product falls in this category.

Your boss may have a list of people who need to see your package. Also check to see what

guidance is available electronically—many units have an Action Officer’s Guide posted on their

website.

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Check with key contacts in the organization. Contacts throughout the organization can be

very helpful during the staffing process. Fellow staffers, executive officers and secretaries can

provide advice on who needs to coordinate on your package, including individuals or agencies

that you hadn’t thought of. Also, they can give you perspectives on what the bosses will and

won’t accept. As you build and get to know this “underground of expertise,” use it to your

advantage.

Realize that the coordination list may grow with time. Don’t be surprised if other offices are

added as the coordination process occurs. Depending on the material and which level of staff

you’re dealing with (wing staff versus Air Staff), you may be unaware of all the offices that need

to see your package.

Is there a person on your coordination list who carries a lot of clout? When planning your

coordination strategy, you should probably determine who the approval Authority is. Who is the

one person that can make or break your package during coordination? Who is the one person

who could kill your project with a nonconcur? These people often have strong feelings about

how and when they are approached. Some of them may hate a “surprise package” and always

want to be the first to be consulted on an issue. In this case you may want to get early buy-in—

which can help ensure that others fall into line. Others may want to see what others have to say

about the issue before it ever reaches their desk. Use your contacts to find out who these

influential people are, what their preferences are and how they like to be approached.

The “How” of Coordination

Aside from deciding who needs to coordinate on your package, you have other things to consider

prior to releasing your package for coordination.

Do you want to send out a preview copy? You may want to send a draft package out early to

potential coordinators, especially for issues that are complex or for offices whose inputs are

crucial to your package’s success. Doing so allows them time to study the issue and also saves

time later during formal coordination. Also, you may want to coordinate by telephone for small

packages, for people who are extremely familiar with the issue or with off-base agencies.

How are you going to route your package to the various coordinating offices? You need to

consider how you’re going to send your package around. Many organizations now utilize

automated tools to assist with the coordination process, such as the Task Management Tool, or

TMT. This method allows for multiple offices to see what others are saying about the product.

Will you have only one copy that is routed to all affected offices? This may work for high-level

packages that don’t have a lot of offices to go through, but the more offices you add to the

coordination list, the longer this process will take. You may want to “shotgun” out a number of

copies of the package so a number of offices can coordinate on the package at the same time.

This will speed up the process, but you will have more copies of the package to keep track of and

the various offices won’t get to see what each other are saying about the material. You will have

to figure out which way will work better for your particular case. Also, don’t forget to determine

when the certifying and approval authority will coordinate on your package.

Consider the boss and the schedule. You’re not done yet. There are some more things you

want to do while preparing to go for coordination. For one, get your boss’s blessing before

going out-of-office. You want to make sure the boss agrees with what you are saying. You

probably want to establish a tentative schedule, based on any deadlines you are up against. If

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you have a deadline for completion, build a schedule backwards from that point to allow for

reviews, changes and recoordination. As part of your schedule planning, check to see if any key

personnel coordinating on your package are going to be TDY or on leave for extended periods.

If you’re using e-mail to send your package around, consider the following. Specify who is

coordinating, who is getting an informational copy, and who will be approving the package. Use

“COORD,” “INFO,” “APPROVE,” or other keywords in the Subject line. Use clear instructions

(i.e., how do you want comments documented and what do you want the offices to do with the

package when they’re finished with it?) and finally, attach all attachments. Chapter 12 provides

specific guidance for e-mail communication.

WAIT! One final check. Before you hit the SEND button or before you go to make all of those

copies to send out, get someone else to review the package to make sure you haven’t forgotten

something obvious. Do one last check for spelling and grammar errors.

Following Your Staff Packages

Know where your staff packages are at all times. Use secretaries, contacts or automated tracking

systems to track your package(s) and follow up, follow up, follow up. Keep the packages

moving according to your schedule. You want to avoid suspensing higher offices, but at the

same time you want to let them know what the situation is so they can help push your package

along. As you get the packages back, keep all correspondence and comments and make sure you

retrieve all coordination copies before going for signature. Make sure you’ve incorporated any

appropriate suggestions into the final product. You may want to summarize the comments and

inputs for the approving authority.

Nonconcurrences

How do you handle a nonconcur? Generally, you only want to send up packages that have

received concurrence from all offices. So, do you change the package or do you just include the

nonconcurrence in the final package? That may depend on where the nonconcur is coming from.

You probably would concede the point to someone with a lot of clout; otherwise your package is

as good as dead. Short of that, what can you do? You may be able to persuade the other party to

see your point of view. If that doesn’t work, do you give in by making small concessions or

make a stand? Before you decide to make a stand, you probably want to think about a couple of

things. For one, is the issue that important, or can you make a concession? Remember also that

with the give and take of staff work, a compromise now may help you later. Choose your battles

carefully; however, there comes a time to stand firm when you know you’re right. Finally, do

you have the full support of your boss? Any unresolved disputes at your level may need to be

highlighted for resolution at a higher level.

Starting Over

Too many substantial changes may require you to start the coordination process all over. You’ll

have to decide if you’ve crossed this threshold once you see what kind of inputs you’re getting

on the package. If you decide to start over, recirculate both the original and changed packages to

illustrate the changes you’ve made and why you’ve made them.

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Finishing Up

Don’t give up. You’ll eventually work your way up the chain until you reach the final audience.

Remember what we said at the beginning: getting that staff package fully coordinated takes a lot

of time, diligence and hard work. Don’t get frustrated. Along the way, you will receive lots of

suggested improvements to your package, but remember why you are coordinating this material

in the first place—to present the boss with the best course of action and to tell him or her who

agreed with it and had inputs to it. So don’t be surprised by inputs that keep your message

consistent with previous decisions by the boss and the other supervisors in your chain of

command.

Coordinating On Others’ Packages

When asked to coordinate on someone else’s package, don’t put it off. Review it, make your

inputs to it and keep it moving. It helps keep your desk clear and the other person may

remember your efficiency when he or she gets your package. This will also keep you from

busting the suspense. If you need more time to review the material, ask for an extension. But

don’t wait until the suspense to ask for an extension—be proactive. Finally, ask if there are any

nonconcurrences on the package so you can take that into consideration.

SUMMARY: As a staffer, you have to remember the big picture. Your job is to get the

corporate stamp on the package. You do this by first getting feedback from a few key

individuals to make sure your message is loud and clear. Then, you get other offices to approve

what you are proposing through the coordination process. Only after the package is fully

coordinated can you provide the boss with the best course of action and tell him who is

supporting that action.

Proper coordination is the oil that lubricates complex organizations and enables efficient

operations. How you view the process and your critical role is crucial. Is coordination just a

bureaucratic hassle that you have to endure, or will you meet the challenge head-on by doing a

professional, proper job? Your attitude is key to success.

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PART IV:

SPEAKING AND

LISTENING

CHAPTER 10:

Air Force Speaking

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CHAPTER 10:

Air Force Speaking

This chapter covers:

• Verbal Communication

• Non-Verbal Communication

• Overcoming Anxiety: Some Simple Steps

• Common Non-Verbal Quirks

• Delivery Formats: Impromptu, Prepared and Manuscript

• Preparing Your Slides

Sooner or later, you will have to speak in public. It comes with being in the military, there’s

little you can do to avoid it, and the requirements will increase as you climb the ranks. If the

thought makes you nervous, you’re not alone! Research shows that most people place fear of

public speaking second only to fear of dying. If you are inexperienced, the fundamentals and

tips for polished speaking in this chapter will help you solve these problems.

One goal should be to improve your self-concept as a speaker. Think positively, and focus on

improvement, not perfection. Like writing and listening, speaking is a skill; once you grasp the

basics, the rest is practice, polish and style. You may be embarrassed by your initial mistakes,

but keep practicing and you’ll see improvement with time. Few of us will become guest

speakers, but all of us can become more effective if we practice the basics. Learn all you can

from your contemporaries; some of them are accomplished speakers. If you are already a

speaker extraordinaire, share your views, tips and personal hang-ups about speaking with others.

Everyone improves when they receive timely and objective feedback.

Practice doesn’t make perfect; perfect practice makes perfect.

–Joan Ballard and Steve Sifers

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Before you consider the fundamentals unique to speaking, you may want to review the chapter 2

summary of the Seven Steps to Effective Communication; the Seven Steps are just as necessary

for good speaking as they are for good writing. Although there are subtle differences in the

drafting and editing sections, the general concepts apply. Indeed, these basic principles are a

good place to start when preparing an oral presentation, but we all know there’s more to it than

that. Let’s talk about delivery techniques by discussing the verbal and non-verbal components of

delivery separately.

SEVEN STEPS FOR EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience

2. Research Your Topic

3. Support Your Ideas

4. Organize and Outline

5. Draft

6. Edit

7. Fight for Feedback and Get Approval

Verbal Communication

How effectively do you use your voice to drive home your ideas or information? You have

control over rate, volume, pitch, pause and other aspects of your speech. So, use your voice to

create interest in your presentation.

Rate

There is no correct rate of speed for every speech. However, you might consider this: People

can listen 4 to 5 times faster than the normal spoken rate of 120 words a minute. So, if you

speak too slowly, you will lose the interest of an audience who is processing information much

faster than you are delivering it! On the other hand, you don’t want to use the same rate of

speech all the time. Use the rate of speech that you need to add emphasis to what you want

during your presentation. Consider speaking at a faster rate to indicate excitement or sudden

action or a slower rate to hint at calm or a more serious tone.

Volume

Volume is another verbal technique that can give emphasis to your speech. If possible, check out

the room to know how loudly you must talk, remembering you will need to talk louder with a

crowd since the sound is absorbed. Ask someone in the back of the room if you can be heard.

Remember your voice will carry further when the room is empty versus full. If the audience

must strain to hear you, they will eventually tune you out from utter exhaustion. A portable

microphone may be a good idea if you know you tend to speak quietly, and one is often required

in large auditoriums. Speak louder or softer to emphasize a point—a softer level or lower

volume is often the more effective way to achieve emphasis.

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Pitch

To use pitch effectively, you need to practice the talents of a singer. Pitch is really the use of

notes (higher or lower) in voice range. Start by speaking in a voice range that is comfortable for

you and then move up or down your scale for emphasis, using pitch changes in vowels, words or

entire sentences. You can use a downward (high to low) inflection in a sentence for an air of

certainty and an upward (low to high) inflection for an air of uncertainty. Variety in speech pitch

helps to avoid monotone and capture the listener’s attention.

Pause

The pause gives you time to catch your breath and the audience time to collect your ideas. Never

hurry a speech; pause occasionally so your audience can digest your comments. The important

question is this: Where? Pauses serve the same function as punctuation in writing. Short pauses

usually divide points within a sentence, and longer pauses note the ends of sentences. You can

also use longer pauses for breaks from one main point to another, from the body to the

conclusion of your speech, or to set off an important point worthy of short reflection. A pause

may seem long to you, but it’s usually much shorter than you think … and your audience will

appreciate it. However, don’t get pause-happy and make your speech sound choppy.

Articulation and Pronunciation

Your articulation and pronunciation reflect your mastery of the spoken English language.

Articulation is the art of expressing words distinctly. Pronunciation is the ability to say words

correctly. Of course, you may be able to articulate your thoughts and still mispronounce words

while doing so. Unfortunately (and unfairly), many people consider word pronunciation or

mispronunciation a direct reflection on your intelligence. Listen to yourself and make your

words distinct, understandable and appropriate to your audience. If you are not sure of your

pronunciation, consult a current dictionary.

Length

In our military environment, you must be able to relay your thoughts and ideas succinctly. A key

rule in verbal communication is to keep it short and sweet. There are few people who will

tolerate a briefer or speaker who wastes the audience’s time. Know what you want to say and

then say it with your purpose and the audience in mind.

Non-Verbal Communication

You never get a second chance to make a first impression.

–Anonymous

Numerous studies have shown that people remember less than 10 percent of what is verbally

presented, but first impressions are largely based on nonverbal communication such as how you

dress, carry yourself, and use gestures and other body language. Your biggest nonverbal

challenge to conquer might be your nervousness, so you must be prepared to overcome (or at

least diminish) stage fright. Stage fright is often nothing more than misdirected energy, meaning

the excitement and/or anxiety you feel is displayed in some form or fashion for all to see. You

probably have witnessed a great presentation “gone bad” solely due to nerves that have gone

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unchecked. Here’s a checklist on how to overcome stage fright and put your best foot forward.

Remember, it may be impossible to be entirely free from nervousness—that’s OK! But you

don’t want the nervousness to disable you from sending your message.

Overcoming Anxiety: Some Simple Steps

• Analyze your audience: listening traits, needs, desires, behaviors and educational

background. This will reduce your fear of the unknown and the resulting nervousness.

• Check out the place where you’re speaking. Is it large enough to accommodate the

number of people? Does it have a video screen, projector, white board, microphone,

tables, chairs, ventilation, lighting, pencils, paper, telephones, etc.

• Practice, practice, practice. Using a recording device, video camera, full-length mirror

or even your peers can be really helpful. Try doing a “dry run” in the room you’ll be in.

• Memorize your introduction and transition into the main point. It’ll help you

through the first and most difficult minute.

• Smile and be positive! Your audience wants you to succeed! Keep your nervousness to

yourself; chances are your audience won’t even notice if you don’t mention it.

• Take a short walk right before you “go on stage” to help release some energy.

• Deliver your message. Focus your attention where it belongs, not on yourself.

• Make eye contact and look for feedback. Let them know you are looking at and

talking to them. It holds their attention. If you look only at your notes, you may lose

your listeners

• Use simple, everyday language appropriate for your audience. Use contractions and

keep sentences short. Use personal pronouns, if appropriate. Repeat key words and

follow with specific examples if you get into abstract or complicated reasoning

• Involve members of your audience by soliciting their answers and information.

• Enhance your presentation through creative use of multi-media examples to get a point

across.

• Use your excess energy naturally: facial expressions, pertinent gestures, walking, or

pressing fingertips or thumbs against lectern or chair. Use your facial expressions, hands

and arms to reinforce your speech and your points of emphasis—just don’t overdo them.

Leaning on the lectern, rocking back and forth or side to side or slouching on one leg and

then the other is never a positive way to use your excess energy. Read on for more tips

on those dreaded nervous habits.

• Looking good builds confidence and builds your credibility with the audience. Do

you need a haircut? Is your uniform pressed? Are your ribbons, nametag and insignia

attached correctly? Your buttons buttoned? Your shoes shined? Are you standing erect

and feeling alert, but relaxed? Remember, in your audience’s mind, a frumpy uniform

and sloppy bearing equals an equally frumpy presenter. Fair or not, that’s the way your

audience’s mind works. We’re all critics!

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Common Nonverbal Quirks

Most of us have quirks and our quirks are magnified when we are put in the limelight. The key

is to be aware of your quirks and keep them under control by seeking feedback from someone

you trust who will be critical and honest. Do any of these common quirks describe you?

• Life raft. A speaker who seeks the safety and security of the podium as though his or

life depended upon holding the podium. For them, walking about the room is

incomprehensible.

• Awkward hands. This speaker is venturing out in front of the audience but is still not

quite sure what to do with his or her hands. The speaker may want to run back to the

safety of the life raft, but instead may place his or her hands awkwardly over certain parts

of the body.

• Hand washer. A speaker who wrings his or her hands nervously while speaking.

• Caged tiger. The speaker paces from one side of the stage to the other without stopping.

• Rocker. Rockers are caged tigers on the road to recovery. They have conquered the

worst phases of stage fright but retain a fear of standing still and simply talking. There

are two style variations: 1) the fore-and-aft rocker and 2) the side-to-side rocker.

• Pocket maniacs. These speakers should consider sewing their pants pockets shut. When

pocket maniacs speak they jam their hands into their pockets in an effort to avoid the

other quirks of the hands. Sadly, this only creates another quirk that is just as distracting.

• Pen clickers. These speakers are related to the pocket maniacs but they have substituted

the clicking of a pen for other annoying quirks of the hands.

• Gadgeteers. These speakers may play with the slide clicker, act as though they have

never seen a slide clicker or needlessly employ countless high-tech devices into the

presentation in an effort to mask nervousness.

• Too Cool. These speakers are overcompensating for a fear of speaking by trying to look

extremely comfortable.

By themselves, these quirks won’t make you fail as a speaker, but they can create problems if

they are severe—the audience begins to focus on the quirk instead of your message. Again, most

of us have done some of these things at one time or another. Try to be aware of your own

mannerisms, keep them in check and make sure they are not detracting from your message.

Delivery Formats: Impromptu, Prepared and Manuscript

Your approach to delivery of the spoken message may be affected by several factors, including

the time you have to prepare and the nature of the message. Three common delivery formats are

listed below.

Impromptu speaking is when we respond during a meeting or “take the floor” at a conference.

It’s what we do when we speak publicly without warning or on a few moments’ notice. To do it

well requires a great amount of self-confidence, mastery of the subject and the ability to “think

on your feet.” A superb impromptu speaker has achieved the highest level in verbal

communications.

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Both students and instructors have had trouble differentiating impromptu and

extemporaneous speaking in the PME classroom. Why? Because dictionaries vary

in how they define these terms. Some, including The Cambridge Dictionary of

American English, define extemporaneous as “done or said without preparation”

(synonymous with impromptu). The Merriam-Webster Dictionary, on the other

hand, states that extemporaneous speech “is prepared in advance but delivered

without notes.” To confuse matters further, extemporaneous briefers in the Air

Force frequently use notes or an outline (but not a script) when speaking. So, for

ease of discussion in this edition of The Tongue and Quill, the term “prepared

speaking” will replace extemporaneous speaking.

Prepared (formerly extemporaneous speaking or briefing) refers to those times when we have

ample opportunity to prepare. Most military briefings are done in this format. This doesn’t

mean we write a script and memorize it, but it does require a thorough outline with careful

planning and practicing. The specific words and phrases used at the time of delivery, however,

are basically spontaneous and sound very natural.

A manuscript briefing is used in situations that require every word to be absolutely perfect. To

do this, you prepare a manuscript, a word-for-word script of what you are going to say. Such a

script ensures you get it right every time. Manuscripts are often used at higher management

levels for complex or controversial issues (policy briefings, press conferences, source selection

briefings to unsuccessful bidders, etc.). They’re also used for routine briefings that must be

repeated several times a year (base orientation, etc.), or at formal ceremonies (retirements, medal

presentations, etc.) that must adhere to established customs and courtesies. Manuscript-style

briefings provide several advantages:

• Ensures key information won’t be omitted.

• Avoids repercussions caused by a briefer’s inadvertent ad-libbing.

• Imparts exact definitions and precise phrasing, if these are important.

• Allows anyone to present a “canned briefing” without extensive preparation and rehearsal

time—including less knowledgeable personnel.

CAUTION! Manuscripts do not make a briefing easier. Reading aloud often sounds dull,

especially when the reader is more focused on saying the right words rather than saying the

words right. Manuscript briefings tend to lack spontaneity, eye contact, and speaker engagement

with the audience. This results in a loss of credibility, both professional and intellectual. Why

should they attend a reading if they can read it themselves? When you can deliver a manuscript

briefing without error that engages the audience, you have mastered “speak-reading.”

Here are some key points in preparing and presenting a manuscript briefing.

• Prepare the briefing:

o Use a large, easy-to-read font (at least size 12) in all capital letters

o Write as if you were speaking

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o Fill only the top two-thirds of page so that your eyes won’t drop and you won’t lose

eye contact with your audience

o Double-space or triple-space the manuscript;

never break words at the end of a line or sentences at the end of a page

o Number pages with bold figures

o Underscore or highlight words you wish to emphasize;

insert double slashes (//) where you plan a major pause

o Use a loose-leaf binder or stack pages loosely to turn pages

o Mark script with red dots to show visual aid changes

• Practice, practice, practice:

o Read and reread until you’ve practically memorized it

o Add the ingredients of volume, inflection and eye contact

o Avoid combinations of words that are difficult to say

o Look at your audience when uttering emphatic words and during the closing words of

a sentence

o Practice using gestures—strive for enthusiasm

o Dry run your visual aids

• Close with confidence:

o Never explain why you choose to read (it won’t be apparent if you’ve prepared!)

o Be flexible; if necessary (and appropriate), know where you can shorten the speech

o Avoid being lengthy after saying “In conclusion.”

o Don’t add new information at the end

Individuals who can strongly present briefings in all three types of delivery formats are the envy

of everyone. They appear knowledgeable and comfortable in their roles as speakers because

they have done their homework. They may be experts on their subject and know how to present

their views with clarity on a moment’s notice (impromptu speaking). They have researched and

rehearsed their presentations (prepared and manuscript briefings). They think carefully before

they speak, outline their main ideas, say what has to be said, and then conclude. Remember,

there is no substitution for preparation. If you have the time to prepare—do it!

Enough with the bells and whistles—just get to the point.

–General Hugh Shelton

As always, check with your organization for local policies on formats.

These are only general guidelines.

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We’ve spent the majority of the chapter on how to speak and how to get over your nervousness.

But there’s more you can do to make an oral presentation more professional and useful for your

audience. Visual aids can enhance your oral presentation by helping the audience remember and

understand the content of your message. Comprehension rises dramatically when we see

something rather than when we just hear about it. The average person retains 5 percent of what

is heard and 65 percent of what is seen. More dramatically, the human brain processes visuals

400,000 times faster than text! In other words, “show and tell” is better than just “tell” alone.

Slides are the most common visual aid used for briefings in today’s Air Force. They help the

briefer to remember key points and help to keep the presentation brief. The presenter makes the

slide simple and fills in the “white space” with concise spoken words.

Before we launch into Slides 101, let’s take a second to stress one point—you are also a visual

aid. If you are well groomed, professional and well prepared, you’ll be the most effective visual

aid in your presentation. If you look like a slob and appear insecure and awkward, the audience

most likely won’t take you or your message seriously. Take the time to put on a freshly pressed

uniform and look sharp!

Preparing Your Slides

Slides are the most common visual aids used today but each organization is different when it

comes down to how your slides should look. However, most organizations in today’s Air Force

agree that the information we present shouldn’t be too complex. Custom animation, if used,

must serve a substantive purpose—not just looks. Keep these tips in mind as you build your

slides or any other visual aid media.

COLOR. Color is a very important communication tool. Good designers limit their color

palettes even if 256 different colors may be available.

• Use colors in a standard manner throughout your presentation.

• Limit your choices to 4 or 5 colors.

• Use light colors on a dark background and vice versa.

• Use colors to emphasize key elements, but try to avoid red lettering.

• Use the same background color on all images.

• Avoid red-green and blue-red color combinations.

• Use bright colors (yellow, orange, etc.) sparingly.

• Maintain good contrast between important information and background.

• Check your slide colors in the room you will be briefing in. Projectors do not always

show the same level of contrast as your monitor.

Most organizations have standard slide show requirements, so check with your organization’s

front office to ensure you’re using the correct presentation design (font, color, background, etc.).

TEXT. The first rule here is “less is more.” Less experienced briefers are often tempted to pack

presentations with every detail they can think of for fear they might leave something out during

the real thing. Slides should have minimal content and lots of “white space.” Slides aim at the

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visual portion of the brain and will only confuse the audience if they are jam-packed with data.

The slides should not be self-explanatory. If they are, you probably have too much stuff on

them. Remember, you should add value to the presentation and should supplement the slides

with your eloquent speaking abilities.

• Keep it simple. Use the “7 x 7 rule: ”

o No more than 7 words per line

o No more than 7 lines per slide

• Spelling is important!

• Don’t read slides—it’s insulting.

• If you have more than one slide per main point, add “Continued” on subsequent slides.

• Have only one thought per slide—it gives the audience time to refocus on you.

• Avoid hyphenation at end of lines.

• Use upper and lower case for three reasons:

o Helps identify acronyms, which we love in the military!

o More comfortable for audience, because this is how we read.

o Makes your presentation look more professional.

• Emphasize key words with boldface, italicized, underlined or colored text.

• Left-justify your text.

• Font size: Use the same type font throughout the presentation.

o Title: 40 point

o Subtitle: 30 point

o Text: 20-26 point

• Most importantly, you fill in the information. So, you should always know and be ready

to present one level of detail below a piece of information. If you don’t, you will end up

reading slides or the audience will have many questions left unanswered.

GRAPHICS. Whether designed for a briefing or written report, no graphic should be so

elaborate it becomes an end in itself and obscures your intended message. However, when used

wisely, graphics can certainly add to your presentation. Although text is important, audiences

remember more when content is graphically presented. A 60-minute briefing can be pretty

boring if it is all done in text. On the flip side, interesting graphics do not guarantee an effective

briefing. Read below for some tips to keep you in check when using graphics.

• Use only artwork suitable for your presentation. Know your audience!

• Use graphs (bar charts, pie charts, etc.) to convey statistics.

• Be careful with graphs: too many can be confusing.

• Line graphs show trends over time.

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• Bar graphs compare values.

• Pie charts compare values against a whole.

• Tables: Don’t use if you can convey information verbally or in a graph—they usually

appear overly “busy” on a slide.

o Limit to 4 rows and 7 columns.

o Use footnotes to remove distracting data from tables.

o Round off numbers if possible.

o Don’t put decimal points in numbers like 10 or 100. The audience may interpret

“100.00” as “10,000.”

• Place your graphics off-center—use them to lead your audience to important text

information.

• Be careful with animation:

o Sound: Use sound effects sparingly and make sure they add impact.

o Slide transitions: Most briefers overuse slide transitions. If you decide to use

transitions, use the same type throughout your entire briefing, and make sure they

add, not detract from your presentation.

• Video can be quite effective, but again, use sparingly.

BOTTOM LINE: Make it Big, keep it Simple, make it Clear, and be Consistent!

SUMMARY: We’ve covered a lot of ground in this section but it all boils down to a few simple

ideas.

• Use vocal characteristics such as rate, volume, pitch and pause to enhance the impact of

your message.

• Be aware of any nonverbal quirks; reduce nervousness through solid preparation.

• Select an appropriate delivery format: impromptu, prepared or manuscript.

• Visual aids can enhance oral presentations, but don’t lose sight of the big picture.

• Stay focused: do your homework on the topic and the delivery.

The more often you speak in front of or with a group, the more self-confident you become. High

confidence and thorough knowledge of your subject are important prerequisites for speaking. In

the end, if you have the time to prepare—do it! There is no substitute for being prepared and

practice. The following lists of “Do’s” and “Don’ts” summarize many of the key ideas of this

chapter as a quick reference. Keep these lists handy to check yourself (or your friends) before

that big presentation to the boss.

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Do’s (For Air Force Speaking)

1. Stand beside your visual aid. Better yet, get away from slides and walk around.

2. This may depend on your purpose and audience, and location of your briefing.

3. Start out with well-prepared opening statement and try to elicit audience involvement by

asking a relevant question or two. Use a personal story or experience (if appropriate) to

bridge to your topic.

4. If referring to screen, stand aside, use a pointer, and put it down when done.

5. Give the audience time to read slides.

6. Read the slide silently or watch to see if audience has finished reading. If slide contains a

long quote, paraphrase or underline important parts.

7. Speak naturally and use gestures.

8. Make the slide simple and fill it out with concise spoken words.

9. Show only necessary slides.

10. Turn off projector or use a cover slide.

11. Check for spelling and punctuation … more than once!

12. Practice handling slides and gauging time needed to read them. Use an assistant to

advance slides if available.

13. Anticipate likely questions and rehearse possible answers. Keep answers short and

simple. Listen carefully to questioner and clarify question if needed.

14. Know your purpose, audience and any time constraints.

15. Practice, practice, practice! And test visual aids prior to your briefing.

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Don’ts (For Air Force Speaking)

1. Stand between the audience and visual aid and block the audience’s view.

2. Jump right into slides.

3. Talk at the screen with back to your audience.

4. Change slides too quickly.

5. Read the slide to the audience.

6. Give a memorized briefing.

7. Show a complicated slide and give a complicated explanation of it.

8. Use slides as gimmicks or crutches.

9. Leave projector on with blank screen.

10. Forget to check spelling and punctuation.

11. Disrupt presentation to handle slides.

12. Be caught off-guard by questions from the audience. Don’t give quick replies. Don’t

direct questions to specific members of audience.

13. If time is limited (5-15 minutes), you may want to consider NOT using slides. In these

cases, it’s more important to establish connection with your audience than it is to show a

few slides.

14. Wing it, and never apologize because you didn’t prepare. This makes you look

irresponsible and ruins your credibility before you even start.

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CHAPTER 11:

Effective Listening Strategies

This chapter covers:

• Understanding Hearing and Listening

• Informative, Critical and Empathic Listening

• Better Listening

• Overcoming Barriers to Listening

Listening is a valuable communication skill, but one that gets little respect and attention. Some

of us spend hours preparing and practicing our briefings; how much time and effort do we spend

on preparing and practicing to listen? Because listening is so undervalued, we’ll first make the

case for why it’s so important and then describe ways to improve your listening skills.

Understanding Hearing and Listening

To better understand the listening process, let’s begin by distinguishing between hearing and

listening. Hearing occurs when your ears pick up sound waves transmitted by a speaker or some

other source. Hearing requires a source of sound and an ear capable of perceiving it. It does not

require the conscious decoding of information. Each day, you hear many sounds—background

music in an elevator, the hum of the computer, cars passing by outside—sounds you may not

even be aware of unless someone draws your attention to them.

Listening, on the other hand, involves making sense out of what is transmitted. Listening

involves not only hearing; it involves attending to and considering what is heard. As you listen,

you receive sounds and you consciously and actively decode them. Effective listening is an

active process and active listening involves exerting energy and responding appropriately in

order to hear, comprehend, evaluate and remember the message.

Listening is critical to good oral communications. Though listening is usually ignored in

formal education, it is the most common form of communication. According to Dr. John Kline,

an authority on Air Force communication and the author of Listening Effectively, studies have

shown that we spend 70 percent of our waking hours in some form of communication.

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When speakers and listeners fail to communicate, the outcomes can be disastrous. Planes can

crash, unit morale can deteriorate, “routine” surgeries can have horrendous outcomes and

families can self-destruct. Though we often focus on the speaker’s role in communication, good

listening skills can often make the difference between success and failure.

Both Air Force and civilian managers put a premium on good listening. In a recent study, 282

members of the Academy of Certified Administrative Managers identified listening as the most

crucial management skill. In another study published in Communication Quarterly, business

people were polled on the most important communication skills they used at work and the one

they wished they had studied in college: Listening was the #1 answer to both questions.

Listening is especially important in the Air Force and actually in any military unit. Success is a

matter of life and death and we routinely maintain and operate equipment valued in the millions.

Receiving, comprehending and remembering spoken information is critical and any

miscommunication is potentially catastrophic. Effective listening helps to build the trust and

mutual respect needed to do our job. Military personnel must understand their team members

and the situation, and leaders with good listening skills often make better decisions and have a

stronger bond with their troops.

To summarize, listening allows us to learn the facts, evaluate situations, understand our team

members and build trust with others. These are all really important, so why do so few people

listen well—why is it so hard—and how do we get better at it?

Everybody wants to talk, few want to think and nobody wants to listen.

–Anonymous

Informative, Critical and Empathic Listening

There are different situations where listening is important and different reasons to listen. It’s

important to acknowledge and identify these differences because appropriate listening behaviors

in one situation might be inappropriate in another situation. Part of the challenge of listening is

sorting out what situation you’re in and what response is appropriate. One way to approach this

sorting process is to look at three major reasons why we listen in the workplace. We’ll talk more

about each of these three categories in later sections, but here’s a summary:

Informative Listening: We listen to collect information from others.

• Receiving radio instructions in an aircraft cockpit.

• Listening to an instructor lecture on good writing technique.

• Receiving a briefing on a change to the assignment process.

• Obtaining medical instructions from a doctor.

• Learning your boss’s expectations during an initial feedback session.

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Critical Listening: We listen to judge—to evaluate a situation and make decisions.

• Investigating causes of a fatal mishap.

• Determining which Airman to nominate for a quarterly award.

• Helping the user formally specify requirements for a new weapon system.

• Deciding which disciplinary action to administer.

Empathic Listening: We listen to understand and help others in situations where emotions

are involved and the speaker, not just the message, is important.

• A subordinate is seeking advice on whether to reenlist.

• Your spouse is worried about your next deployment.

• A coworker is unsure how to deal with subtle discrimination.

• Your teenager doesn’t want to move during senior year; you’ve got orders.

• You’re trying to mend fences with a coworker after a major conflict.

Informative, Critical and Empathic listening categories can be used in two different ways. First,

they can be used to characterize listening situations—that is, why we should be listening in this

situation. Second, they can be used to describe listening approaches—the behaviors we use in a

given situation and how we are listening.

Using an incorrect listening category for a certain listening situation may be problematic. For

example, using an informative listening approach (taking notes, asking focused questions) in an

empathic listening situation (an angry spouse who feels you’re neglecting the family) could

cause the communicative act to fail. Keep reading to uncover how to match listening categories

to particular acts of communication.

Informative Listening

In informative listening, the listener’s primary concern is to understand information exactly as

transmitted. A successful listening outcome occurs when the listener understands the message

exactly as the sender intended. Informative listening is important when receiving information

from an established authority or receiving information that is not open for debate.

For example, if you’re receiving a briefing on changes to the assignment system, your goal

should be to understand exactly what the rules are, not to sort out the reasons why you think the

rules are off track. If you’re receiving formal training that will be followed by a test, your

primary goal should be to understand the material, not to evaluate whether the material should be

taught at this level.

Improving informative listening: There are several steps you can take to improve your

informative listening skills.

1. Keep an open mind. If your primary goal is to understand the message, set aside your

preconceptions about the topic and just listen.

2. Listen as if you had to teach it. Many education and training specialists suggest this

technique. Typically we expend more effort to understand a subject when we know that

we have to teach it to someone else. By taking this approach, we have the mental

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fortitude to focus longer, ask questions when we don’t understand and think more deeply

on a topic.

3. Take notes. Focus on main points and don’t attempt to capture everything. This classic

technique is used in situations where you are trying to capture objective information, such

as in classes, staff meetings, etc. Note that if the listener and speaker are in a less formal,

emotionally-charged situation, note taking might be misconstrued as hostile behavior

(i.e., being put “on the record,” or being documented for future adverse action) so use

your judgment on whether it is appropriate to the situation.

4. Exploit time gap between thinking and speaking speeds. The average speaking rate is

180 words per minute while most listeners can process 500 words per minute. Use this

extra time to mentally repeat, forecast, summarize and paraphrase the speaker’s remarks.

5. Respond and ask appropriate questions. Good informative questions help you clarify

and confirm you understand the message. Remember that you are trying to absorb as

much information as possible and you are less focused on making value judgments on the

material. Here are some examples of appropriate questions or responses:

a. Repeat exact content back to the speaker: “You said we need toner, copy paper

and a three-hole punch. I’ll go get them now.”

b. Paraphrase the speaker in your own words: “So if I understand you, then….”

c. Ask for more specifics or details: “When you say a draft is due on 15 April, is that

before or after the internal coordination process?” or

“How does the situation change if you’re married to another military member?”

d. Request an example for clarity:

“If asking good questions can help listening

performance, can you provide some examples?”

Critical Listening

Critical listening can be thought of as the sum of informative listening and critical thinking. In

this case, the listener actively analyzes and evaluates the message and listening success requires

understanding the message and assessing its merit. The listener is evaluating the support offered

by the speaker—as well as the speaker’s credentials and logic—and may either agree or disagree

with the message. Critical listening may be appropriate when seeking input to a decision,

evaluating the quality of staff work or a subordinate’s capabilities, or conducting research. Also,

critical listening is related to critical thinking—they should occur simultaneously for the best

critical thinkers.

Critical Thinking

Critical thinking is the act of exercising careful judgment in forming opinions or

conclusions. In chapter 4, we described how intellectual standards like accuracy, precision,

relevance and clarity can be used to evaluate the quality of information sources. Critical

thinking attempts to improve the quality of thought by using these same standards. It is

self-directed, self-disciplined and self-corrective thinking applied to an important problem.

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Improving critical listening: Several of the suggestions made for improving informative

listening are equally important for critical listening: after all, you need to understand the

message before you can critically analyze it.

1. Take notes. See “Improving Informational Listening” on the previous page.

2. Listen as if you had to grade it. Teaching a topic is tough, but grading another’s

presentation of a topic is even tougher. Is the message clear and precise? Is the

supporting material relevant and convincing? Does this make sense? Your attempt to

mentally answer questions like these may help you stay focused on the speaker.

3. Exploit time gap between thinking and speaking speeds. Use the time gap described

on the message. Remember to try to understand first and then evaluate second. Even

when you are listening critically, don’t mentally argue with the speaker until the message

is finished.

4. Ask appropriate questions. Good critical listening questions will be probing in nature

so you can better evaluate the intellectual content of the speaker’s message. Some

examples of good critical listening questions can be found in The Miniature Guide to

Critical Thinking by Richard Paul and Linda Elder.

a. Accuracy: How could we verify or test that? Are others reporting the same results?

b. Relevance: How does that fact relate to the problem?

c. Breadth: Do we need to consider another point of view?

d. Logic: Do our conclusions flow from our evidence?

e. Significance: Is this the central idea? The most important problem?

f. Fairness: Do we have any vested interests? How would opponents view this issue?

Empathic Listening

In empathic listening, we listen with the primary intent to understand the speaker and his or her

frame of reference. Empathic listening is often useful when communication is emotional, or

when the relationship between speaker and listener is just as important as the message. It is often

used as a first step in the listening process, a prerequisite to informational or critical listening.

Empathic listening is often appropriate during mentoring and non-punitive counseling sessions

and can be very helpful when communicating with family members. Depending on the situation,

it may also be useful in negotiation and teambuilding activities.

Empathic Listening: Not just emotional

Though most people quickly see that empathic listening skills are useful in dealing with a

spouse or a child, some might think this listening approach is too “sensitive” for the

military environment.

Realize that the same reasons these skills are relevant within a family make them relevant

within the workplace. Empathic listening builds trust and encourages cooperation and may

help small group cohesion—a critical factor in team performance in combat and crisis

situations. Though you may not see many empathic listening behaviors when the bullets

are flying, it lays the groundwork for success in that environment.

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In the book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Dr. Stephen Covey suggests that listening

be used to “diagnose before you prescribe” when dealing with others, a concept captured by the

phrase: “Seek First to Understand, then to be Understood.” Empathic listening is described as a

powerful tool to understand others and to build relationships. If you allow yourself to fully listen

for both content and feeling and then reflect that back, there are several productive outcomes: 1)

The listener truly understands how the speaker feels; 2) The speaker feels understood; 3) The

listener can give better advice; and 4) The speaker will be more open to it.

Improving empathic listening: For empathic listening to be successful, the listener must

understand the content of the message and the speaker must feel understood. It’s this second

half—making the speaker feel understood—which requires some specialized skills.

Don’t you hate it when others want to “one-up” your story or when they jump in and give advice

before they understand? If you’d like to improve your emphatic listening skills, try to avoid the

following invasive responses that may prevent you from seeking to understand.

• AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL STORIES: “Your situation is just like something that

happened to me…” “When I was your age…”

• ADVISING: Immediately providing counsel based on our own experience—whether or

not it was requested.

• PROBING: Asking questions solely from our own frame of reference.

• EVALUATING: Immediately agreeing or disagreeing.

These types of responses are discouraged because they distract the speaker from the critical part

of the message, and they allow the listener to derail the conversation. Extroverts have more

difficulty avoiding autobiographical responses than introverts do. Parents often use these

responses with their children—the trick is to decide how much is too much. These responses are

appropriate after the speaker feels understood and is looking for advice or help; it’s just

important to wait until that point. The listener should return to empathic listening if emotions

rise again.

The skills involved in empathic listening are easy to describe, but difficult to practice. To help

you remember them, think about the acronym “HEAR.”

H = HEART: Commit to listening sincerely, avoid manipulation; remember the

importance of the person, as well as the issue.

E = EMOTIONS: Look and listen for speaker’s emotions as much as their words.

A = AVOID: Avoid advice, autobiographies, evaluation; don’t interrupt or change the

subject.

R = REFLECT: Reflect back meaning and feeling until the speaker feels understood.

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Better Listening

Listening takes a lot of effort. Our willingness to exert that effort is linked to our motivation to

listen. Techniques to improve listening skills are worthless without cultivating the motivation to

use them. To evaluate your own listening motivation, ask yourself the following questions:

• Do I pretend to listen?

• Do I seek distractions?

• Do I criticize the speakers?

• Do I stereotype topics as uninteresting?

• Do I prejudge the meaning and intent of speakers’ messages?

• Do I avoid difficult and complex topics?

• Do I get emotionally charged up about minor points a speaker has made?

• In a conversation, do I tune out the speaker because I’m preparing my response?

• Do I interrupt others? Has anyone told me I sometimes interrupt others?

• Do I spend a disproportionate amount of time talking in meetings or social events?

• Does everything a speaker describes remind me of something that happened to me?

Though we’ve all been guilty of these once in a while, if you answered “yes” to three or more

questions, then you might benefit from some of the suggestions to improve your listening skills

later in the chapter.

Sometimes we have blind spots and overestimate our success as listeners. In his book, Listening

Effectively, Dr. Kline describes how most individuals in groups will rate their own listening skills

as 7.5 out of 10 while rating the rest of the group as 4.1 out of 10. These data indicate that most

people see listening as a problem in others but not in themselves.

Here’s another set of “workplace climate” questions to consider. If you have “yes” answers to

several of these questions, you might want to take a closer look at how you listen and interact

with others.

• Do employees go around you to talk to others about work issues?

• Do you often learn about important events after the fact?

• Do you frequently find yourself putting out organizational fires?

• Are you rarely tasked with complicated responsibilities?

• Do you receive lots of information in writing … including some items that would

normally be handled face to face?

Sometimes it takes a deliberate effort to cultivate our motivation to listen. In today’s culture, a

“good communicator” is often defined in terms of one’s speaking ability, yet many would argue

that listening is just as important, if not more so. Today’s effective listeners command respect

and admiration because listening is crucial to solving problems and making decisions.

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Overcoming Barriers to Listening

Think about the times you did a good job of listening. Why did you do well? One of the reasons

was probably your level of motivation. Here are four suggestions on how to enhance your

motivation to listen in future situations.

1. Recall why this listening situation is important. Listeners should try to remember why this

particular situation is important. Speakers should try to remind their audience why it’s important

to listen, too.

a. Informative and listening situations:

1) Is it critical to mission success; will this help me do my job better?

2) Will this information help me make a better decision?

3) Is it on the test; is it a prerequisite for other material that is on the test?

4) Can someone get hurt if we mess this up?

5) Will our unit look bad if I don’t “get” it; will I look bad?

6) Will we be discussing this later; will I have to teach this to someone else?

7) Is understanding this presentation important to my personal or family goals?

b. Critical listening situations:

1) Do I have to decide which position to take?

2) Is the evidence strong and the logic sound?

3) What unanswered questions surround this issue; what things are being left unsaid?

c. Empathic situations:

1) Is this speaker having trouble communicating the facts because of strong emotions?

2) Do I need to mend fences with this coworker?

3) In this negotiation, am I really sure I know what is most important to the other party?

4) Does this family member count on me for emotional support?

5) Do I have a personal commitment to this person as well as this issue?

2. Identify and correct barriers to listening motivation. Both listeners and speaker can

benefit from a hard look at factors that may inhibit listening. What factors can you control?

What factors do you just have to live with? Fix what you can and acknowledge what you can’t.

a. Physical barriers may block listening—noisy equipment, visual distractions, etc. Avoid

distractions when possible: If you can, sit up front. This puts less noise and visual

distraction between you and the speaker and allows you to more clearly see any visual

aids. Sitting next to quiet people also helps you to focus on the speaker.

b. Personal barriers such as physical fatigue, illness and discomfort, as well as

psychological distractions like work, family or financial problems, can also affect

listening.

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c. Semantic barriers may create obstacles: the speaker’s intent may not be understood by

the audience when using words or phrases with more than one meaning; ideas, objects or

actions with more than one word image; or slang, jargon or organizational acronyms. For

example, the word “crusade” may have one connotation with an audience in Ohio, but

have a different connotation when used in a press conference in the Middle East.

3. Look for common ground. Our listening motivation is crippled when we adversely

stereotype speakers or topics. Are you carrying around biases that might be triggered by a

speaker’s age, race, religion, gender, ethnicity or personal appearance? Have you already

decided that this topic is uninteresting, irrelevant or taught at a level that is below you? This

kind of thinking can be lethal to listening motivation.

To break the pattern, ask yourself some more empowering questions. What are the underlying

commonalities and interesting interrelationships between your interests and those of the speaker?

Relate the topic at hand to your own interests. Sometimes this small, simple exercise creates an

interesting challenge and bridges the gaps that exist.

4. Treat listening as a learning opportunity and an intellectual challenge. So, how do you

become motivated to listen to a topic that may, at first glance, seem boring, unrelated or

irrelevant?

a. If you’re listening to an informational briefing on a topic you’re already an expert on,

listen to improve your ability to teach the topic to someone else. How did the speaker

organize the talk? What terms were defined? What terms were not defined? Did the

speaker use interesting examples that you could “borrow” when you try to explain to

someone else?

b. If you’re listening to a speaker who’s failing miserably, ask yourself how could he or she

do better? Make some notes and offer tactful but constructive feedback later.

c. Translate the problem to a personal, intellectual challenge. Effective and active listening

is an exercise in critical thinking and can serve to sharpen your concentration skills.

Develop a “remember game” and make listening a learning activity.

SUMMARY: In our eagerness to make our point or make our mark, we often forget there’s

more to the story than what we know. Listening is a critical communication skill that doesn’t get

the attention it deserves. Misunderstandings and mistakes in communication can be lethal in the

military environment, and listening helps build trust between members of the Air Force team.

In this chapter we have talked about three approaches to listening—informative, critical and

empathic listening. Different situations call for different approaches and the listening skills used

should be tailored to the situation.

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PART V:

WORKPLACE

CHALLENGES

CHAPTER 12:

Electronic Communications and Social Media

- 133 -

CHAPTER 12:

Electronic Communications

and Social Media

This chapter covers:

• Electronic Mail (E-mail)

• Social Media

• Instant Messaging (IM) and Texting

• Telephones, Voice Mail and FAX

• Electronic Communications Glossary

Innovation in the 21st century is at your fingertips—literally. The changes in electronic

communication technologies, software, and applications are rapid with new methods to stay

connected being developed and deployed daily. They are also subsequently disappearing at an

alarming rate, as the new next big thing is introduced. The Tongue and Quill would be

presumptuous to address the specifics of all electronic communication technologies. Such

content would fill volumes of books and many large organizations have written guidance on

electronic communications. Your unit may fall under the purview of such higher-headquarters

guidance. But we would also be remiss if we did not address some fundamental principles

applicable to all electronic communications. For these reasons, we’ll hit the basics here and

suggest you check with your local experts for more details on policies applicable to your

electronic communications and social media.

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To keep this chapter both simple and relevant, we focus on electronic mail (e-mail), social

media, voice mail and FAX since these are the official means of many or most electronic

communications in the Air Force; however, the principles here can be applied to other electronic

communications and “the next big thing” that is just around the corner. At the end of the day,

electronic communications are just forms for communicating with each other and we need to

treat all communications with the same attitude as if we were face to face.

Electronic Mail (E-Mail)

The Air Force has learned a great deal about e-mail since it was adopted into the fabric of our

Service and these lessons remain valid today. We have learned that there are both advantages

and disadvantages; that we must differentiate between personal or official communications; that

all communications are more effective when they are well organized; and that there are special

considerations and protocols for e-mail.

Advantages and Disadvantages

Though some communication guidelines are universal (FOCUS principles, the Seven Steps to

Effective Communication, etc.), e-mail is a unique medium—it’s advantages can easily become

disadvantages, especially when you consider the ability to reach numerous people at once and

the longevity of electronic communications.

• Three common e-mail advantages

o It’s fast.

o It can get to more people.

o It’s paperless.

• Three common e-mail disadvantages

o It’s fast … but a quickly written e-mail can fan as many fires as it extinguishes.

o It can get to more people … but too many copies can clog the network and can be

forwarded into the wrong hands.

o It’s paperless … but leaves a permanent electronic trail; can disappear permanently

with power fluctuations; and too many times we print our e-mail (on recycled paper).

E-mail: Personal and Official

E-mail may have started as an informal communication technique, but today it covers the

spectrum from personal to professional. Professional or official e-mail is different from

personal e-mail—it’s more like a business memo. It does affect the Air Force and the rules you

follow should conform to military courtesy. The same care and attention to detail should be

taken with professional e-mail as with “paper copy” correspondence. The following pages

provide guidelines to help keep you on track with your e-mail correspondence.

Chapter 3 of AFMAN 33-152, User Responsibilities and Guidance for Information Systems,

provides guidance on what constitutes “effective use of Internet-based capabilities,” especially as

applied to personal and official use of e-mail. “Government-provided hardware and software are

for official use and limited authorized personal use only. Limited personal use must be of

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reasonable duration and frequency that have been approved by the supervisors and do not

adversely affect performance of official duties, overburden systems or reflect adversely on the

Air Force or the DOD.”

The responsible use of Internet-based capabilities from AFMAN 33-152, chapter 3, specifically

addresses or prohibits certain actions on government communication systems. The following

actions are prohibited on government communication systems:

• Unauthorized personal use.

• Uses that adversely reflects on the DoD or the Air Force.

• Unauthorized storing, processing, displaying or transmitting prohibited content.

• Storing or processing classified information on any system not approved for classified

processing.

• Using copyrighted material in violation of the rights of the owner of the copyrights.

• Unauthorized use of the account or identity of another person or organization.

• Unauthorized viewing, changing, damaging, deleting or blocking of another user’s files.

• Attempting to circumvent, modify or defeat security systems.

• Obtaining, installing, copying, storing or using software in violation of the appropriate

vendor’s license agreement.

• Permitting an unauthorized individual access to a government-owned or government-

operated system.

• Unauthorized modification of the network operating system or configuration.

• Copying and posting of FOUO, controlled unclassified information (CUI), Critical

Information (CI) and/or personally identifiable information (PII) on DoD–owned,

–operated, or –controlled publically accessible sites or on commercial Internet-based

capabilities.

• Unauthorized downloading and installing freeware, shareware or any other software.

The network, like the phone, is subject to monitoring. Your e-mail is saved on back-up files and

servers. Once written and sent, an e-mail is a permanent part of the electronic record.

Personal E-Mail

Personal e-mail sometimes contains shorthand and slang that would be unacceptable in a

professional communication. Emoticons (facial expressions) or abbreviations are sometimes

used with humor or satire in an attempt to make sure the audience doesn’t “take things the wrong

way.” They are a resource, but use them sparingly. Some of them are more clever than clear,

and much of your audience may only know the smiling face.

Official E-Mail

Official e-mail consumes a large part of the day for many Airmen. We can accomplish a great

deal by e-mail, especially with those who are at a distance. E-mail can be particularly useful for

electronically staffing official documents, ideas and initiatives. If properly managed, e-mail

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coordination and staffing can increase efficiency. If not managed well, e-mail staffing is just as

problematic as paper folders and distribution envelopes lost in the system. To maximize the

efficiency of e-mail coordination and staffing, use organizational accounts when sending

correspondence to offices for coordination or action. Each MAJCOM typically issues their own

guidance on the details of how electronic staffing should be implemented, and local commanders

may provide additional guidelines that take into account the local conditions and unit operating

procedures. Check your local guidance for electronic staffing implementation details.

Official E-Mail: An Example

A professional e-mail has three distinct qualities: FOCUS, FOCUS, and FOCUS (focused,

organized, clear, understandable and supported). Experience amongst the authors of The Tongue

and Quill tells us that shorter e-mails tend to communicate better than longer e-mails. This

suggests that while you must address the issue, the whole issue, and nothing but the issue you

cannot write War and Peace levels of detail into every e-mail and expect any action quickly.

Balance what you present in an e-mail with the audience and action you need. Focus their

attention on the issue and what needs to be done—nothing more, and nothing less.

From: [system-generated user information]

To: [appropriate organizational account, individuals, or distribution list for ACTION]

Cc: [as required for INFORMATION]

Subject: INFO: Air Force Doctrine Update

Date: [system-generated date-time group]

[Greeting],

BLUF: Effective 29 Oct 13, all Air Force Doctrine Documents (AFDDs) have been

rescinded and replaced by core doctrine volumes and doctrine annexes.

- Core doctrine is categorized into five volumes: Volume I, Basic Doctrine; Volume II,

Leadership; Volume III, Command; Volume IV, Operations; and Volume V, Support

- Each core doctrine volume is supported by one or more annexes.

- For further information, go to https://doctrine.af.mil/.

//SIGNED//

WILLIAM B. MITCHELL, Colonel, USAF

Director, Doctrine Development

LeMay Center for Doctrine Development and Education

Voice: DSN 493-0000 / Comm (334) 953-0000

FAX: DSN 493-0001 / Comm (334) 953-0001

william.mitchell.1947@us.af.mil

This example e-mail focuses readers on a major change in the way Air Force doctrine is

organized. You will notice that this e-mail maintains FOCUS by addressing only the issue (F);

being organized (O); using clear language (C); understands its audience of all Airmen (U); and is

logical with support information used sparingly (S).

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Content Organization

A typical official or professional e-mail is brief and provides information or direction clearly.

Some e-mails may be lengthy but should be clearly organized so that the reader has a rapid

means to find out the facts and any action that may be required. As discussed in chapter 2, the

BLIND and BLUF organization techniques work well to convey a message clearly in a limited

space. Recent experience suggests that the headings for the electronic staff summary sheet

(eSSS) also work very well for all types of messages—not just those requiring coordination.

These three methods are outlined, below:

The “BLIND” Organization Method

When your space is limited by a form or process, the BLIND method of organization places

emphasis on the bottom line followed by additional key elements. The BLIND method of

organization is especially useful in e-mail communications where the content is brief and needs

to be seen by “the boss” for action.

• BL = Bottom Line

• I = Impact on the organization

• N = Next steps to be taken

• D = Details to support the bottom line and any significant discussion points

While there are no set limits on how long a BLIND message can be, the point of the format is

brevity. It is not unlike the content for the eSSS that includes Purpose, Background, Discussion,

Views of Others and Recommendation; however, the BLIND organization technique is more

readily used for quick messages in the field or office to a commander, leader or decision maker

that provides enough substance to act without providing everything you know.

The “BLUF” Organization Method

The BLUF organization technique is even less structured than the BLIND organization

technique. BLUF simply translates to “bottom line up front” with no set format for what

follows. The official e-mail example, above, uses the BLUF organization method. With the

BLUF method, the elements of the eSSS may be used to follow the BLUF to provide essential

information. Use the technique preferred by the level of command for the intended audience of

your e-mail. The point of the BLUF organization method is to maintain a focus on the action

needed by leaders and decision makers while also providing key background information.

The eSSS Organization Method

By clearly stating your purpose, followed by pertinent background information, you can then

present the discussion and views of others followed by a recommendation or bottom line. If used

to organize an e-mail the e-SSS headings can be set to the left in all caps followed by the brief,

but appropriate, content for each heading. The common eSSS headings, in order, are PURPOSE;

BACKGROUND; DISCUSSION; VIEWS OF OTHERS and RECOMMENDATION. They are

typically all capitals and numbered as the primary paragraphs (level 1) in an eSSS.

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Special Considerations and E-mail Protocol

There are both special considerations and e-mail protocol, or network etiquette (“netiquette”), for

proper behavior while communicating electronically on-line and on smart phones, tablets or

other mobile devices. In short, there are many ways to make embarrassing social blunders and

offend people when communicating electronically. To make matters worse, there is something

about cyberspace that causes a “brain burp” and erases the reality that we deal with real, live

humans and not just the text on a screen. Respect the netiquette and remember that the network

is multicultural: personal and cultural nuances get lost in transmission. Note, some aspects of

the e-mail system itself (e.g. software, gateways and hardware) dictate some practices.

Special Considerations

The discussion so far has been fairly general with concepts and procedures that are applicable to

any e-mail, but there are special considerations to employ when using e-mail in your official

capacity. These considerations will help you decide if e-mail is the correct method to staff your

package, get a response from the appropriate office, and avoid misunderstandings at the other

end of the electronic trail.

• Consider whether e-mail is the best choice. Face-to-face conversations, phone calls,

personal letters, or posted documents to a collaborative site may be more appropriate.

• Use appropriate greetings. Address people with their rank/title when appropriate.

• Use appropriate closings. Official e-mail should close with “//SIGNED//” above the

signature block to signify official Air Force information. Restrict the signature block to

name, rank, service affiliation, duty title, organization name, phone numbers (DSN and/or

commercial as appropriate) and social media contact information. Do not add slogans,

quotes or other personalization to an official e-mail/social media signature block.

• Follow the chain of command. Comply with standard procedures to correspond with

superiors. Be professional and watch what you say since e-mail is easily forwarded.

• Think of the e-mail address as the recipient’s personal phone number. If the topic is

important enough that you’d call the general without talking with the colonel, then send

the message to the general. (Don’t quibble—sending the colonel an info copy of the

message doesn’t count as following the chain of command.)

• Get approval before sending to large groups or the public. Check local policies for

the proper permission you must obtain before using large e-mail distribution lists.

Excessive e-mail sent to large distribution lists can waste a great deal of time. E-mail

sent to the general public must still be cleared through proper Air Force channels.

• Classified material. Classified material should never be stored or transmitted on an

unclassified computer network or system.

Rules for the Electronic Communications Network: Netiquette

The special considerations, above, incorporated into a general set of rules for electronic

communications on the network, sometimes called network etiquette or “netiquette.”

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Rule #1: Be Clear and Concise

• Filter information to provide what is necessary, not necessarily everything you know.

Whether the sender is initiating, replying to, or forwarding an e-mail, it is the sender's

responsibility to delete extraneous information and summarize necessary information

near the beginning of the e-mail prior to submission.

• The “Subject” line must communicate your purpose succinctly and be specific. A

specific, clear, and succinct subject line will help others locate your message later.

• Lead with your most important info. If your goal is to answer a question, then paste the

question on top for clearer understanding.

• Use topic sentences if the e-mail has multiple paragraphs. Consider using the e-SSS

organization method. Shorter e-mails are likely to benefit from the BLUF or BLIND

organization methods.

• Be brief and stick to the point. Follow all the basic rules for drafting clear and concise

messages. Clear messages are even more important in e-mail because we get so many

every day. Address the issue, the whole issue, and nothing but the issue. Try to get your

message into 24 lines or less—the typically viewing area on many computers.

• Use bold, italics or color to emphasize key sentences. If your e-mail doesn’t allow these,

a common method uses asterisks to provide emphasis of the *key points.*

• Choose readable fonts. Times New Roman and Arial fonts in 12 points or larger are

easily readable. Save the script fonts for your signature.

• Spell check. Always spell check the e-mail before sending.

Rule #2: Watch Your Tone

• Be polite. Treat others as you want to be treated. Use tact; then use more tact. Then, for

good measure, use more tact. Think of the message as a personal conversation. If you

were face to face, would you say the same words and be as abrupt? If not—rewrite the

message with a more positive tone.

• Be careful with humor, irony and sarcasm. Electronic postings can be perceived much

more harshly than they are intended, mainly because you cannot see body language, tone

of voice and other nonverbal signals that make up 90 percent of interpersonal

communications. Positive enthusiasm can be easily mistaken for angry defiance when

you use capital letters, exclamation points, and strong adjectives and adverbs.

• DON’T SHOUT. Do not write in ALL CAPITAL LETTERS—it’s the e-mail version of

shouting and it’s considered very rude.

• Keep it clean and professional: E-mail is easily forwarded. Harassing, intimidating,

abusive or offensive material is obviously unacceptable, but aim for a higher standard. If

you wouldn’t want it posted on the office bulletin board, it doesn’t belong in an e-mail.

• Don’t send in haste and repent at leisure. E-mail can get you into trouble—its informality

encourages impulsive responses, but your words can be printed out and forwarded. If

you’re really mad about an issue, go ahead and draft an e-mail, but don’t send it until you

calm down and read it over. Never flame! If you do, be prepared to apologize.

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Rule #3: Be Selective About What Messages You Send

• Don’t discuss controversial, sensitive, official use only, classified, personal, privacy act

or unclassified information requiring special handling of documents over e-mail. You

just may one day see yourself on CNN or America’s Most Wanted.

• Remember Operational Security (OPSEC). OPSEC is a continuous analytical process

which involves identifying sensitive information, recognizing that information could be

valuable to an adversary, and making changes in the way we do things to reduce our risk

that the information will be compromised. Even unclassified information, when brought

together with other information, can create problems in the wrong hands. The rash of

hacking events in the news emphasizes the need for good OPSEC and COMPUSEC.

• Don’t create or forward junk mail or chain letters.

• Don’t use e-mail for personal ads.

• Don’t fire or promote by e-mail. Some messages should be delivered face to face.

• Pick up the phone and call to acknowledge receipt of important or time-sensitive e-mail

instead of replying to the sender via e-mail. Face-to-face communication is sometimes

still the best means to communicate.

Rule #4: Be Selective About Who Gets the Message

• Target e-mail messages to only those individuals or organizations that need the

information. Consciously choose recipients of original messages, forwards or replies.

• Use “reply all” sparingly.

• Get appropriate permission before using large e-mail distribution lists.

• Double-check the address(es) before mailing, especially when selecting from a global list

where many people have similar names.

• Send official e-mail to an organizational e-mail account (instead of an individual) when

an organization’s answer or coordination is required.

Rule #5: Check Your Attachments and Support Material

• Ensure all information is provided the first time—attachments, support, key information.

• Check your attachments to ensure they are correct and you are able to open them.

• Cite all quotes, references and sources. Respect copyright and license agreements … it’s

the law! The failure to cite sources is, perhaps, the most common omission. Knowing

“who says so” is an important factor in weighing the evidence where a decision is

needed. Cite your sources.

• If the attachment is a large file, must go to a number of e-mail accounts, or will require

frequent viewing, consider posting to a collaborative site such as the Air Force Portal or

SharePoint®. This makes the attachments easily available for future search and retrieval

and keeps e-mail inboxes from bogging down.

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Rule #6: Keep Your E-Mail Under Control

• Lock your computer when you leave your workstation to prevent anyone from reading

your e-mail or sending unauthorized messages from your account.

• Create mailing lists to save time.

• Read and trash personal e-mails daily. Create a .pst file on your local hard drive to keep

e-mails stored on the e-mail server at a minimum.

• Consider using Microsoft Outlook’s “Out-of-Office Assistant” if you will be unable to

respond to e-mails for an extended period of time. However, OPSEC considerations

should take precedence when setting up out-of-office rules.

Rule #7: Use Proper Format for Official E-mail

• Subject lines should follow the format: [Classification/FOUO Marking][KEYWORD]

[suspense DD MMM YY][Subject].

o Classification/FOUO marking are only included if required.

o Air Force classification marking instructions are found in the following instructions:

 AFI 33-332, Air Force Privacy and Civil Liberties Program

 AFI 31-401, Information Security Program Management

 DoD 5200.1-R, Information Security Program

• Keywords, such as those below, help the recipient prioritize the e-mail.

o ACTION-Necessary to take action (other than SIGN or COORD)

o SIGN-Signature required

o COORD-Coordination required

o INFO-For information purposes only

o URGENT-Time-critical information included

• The word "Suspense" or “Tasker” and suspense date are optional; use only when a

suspense is required.

• “Subject” should be a short description of the e-mail (5-7 words is optimal) and should be

updated with each send, forward or reply to accurately describe the e-mail’s contents.

Remove the “FW: ” and “RE: ” on forwards and replies when it does not add value.

• Sample subject lines with Keywords, Suspense Dates and Subjects.

o ACTION: Suspense: 14 Dec 10; Deliver E-mail Policy to DS for Signature

o INFO: Plans and Programs Meeting Minutes

o SIGN: Suspense 14 Dec 10; Congratulatory Letter for Capt LaJonah

• Consider using the Bottom Line Up Front (BLUF) format as the first paragraph.

• E-mail body should:

o Succinctly capture critical information and describe the issue

o Describe the current status and actions taken

o Clearly state expected and requested actions when appropriate

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o For forwards and replies: if the string of previous e-mail forwards or replies does not

add value, remove them from the message

Rule #8: Use Organizational E-Mail Accounts

• Organizational Mailboxes (OMs) are shared e-mail accounts specific to an organization.

Personnel associated with organizational units should be provided access to the

respective OMs. OMs should exist at each level of the organization (e.g., directorate,

division, branch, flight or element).

• Distribution Lists (DLs) are specific groups of e-mail addresses and/or other distribution

lists aggregated into one named list. When sending e-mail to a DL, every individual in

the list, or sub-list, receives a copy of the e-mail. Send e-mail to DLs sparingly.

• When communicating information to an organization, OMs are preferred to DLs. Each

organization is then responsible for determining how to manage the e-mails in its mailbox

and notifying its personnel accordingly.

• E-mail sent on behalf of an office or organization is official correspondence and should

be filed and maintained in an approved file structure. Consult AFMAN 33-363,

Management of Records, or your organization’s Functional Area Records Manager for

records management procedures.

Social Media

People of all ages use social media daily. According to December 2012 Pew Internet Project

data, 67percentof adults who are online participate in social networking. It’s an efficient way to

keep in touch with friends and family, and it is how many people get their entertainment, connect

with people over common interests and receive news.

You are encouraged to use social media to share your experiences as an Airman. You can

contact your local public affairs office to see if they can share your story, or you can publish

information on your social media accounts. Whether you’re sharing information with just your

close friends and family, or sharing it with the world in an online video or a blog, you’re

informing people on what it’s like to be a part of the world’s greatest Air Force.

• Your stories might inspire someone to join the Air Force, support the Air Force, comfort

a parent or spouse, improve morale or correct inaccurate information.

• Air Force families may want to use social media to keep in touch with deployed Airmen,

network with other military families and share stories on social media.

People can feel comfortable about using social media and letting their Airmen use social media.

It’s one of the many tools available to communicate information, and it has a value-added

capability of promoting interaction.

Using Social Media

Social media applications have evolved to become the primary communication methods used by

today’s Airmen, families and leaders. The dynamic nature of social media lets people interact

with diverse audiences in an informal and transparent environment. It’s an avenue for leaders to

help shape conversations about their units and missions and connect with people on a personal

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level. However, all Airmen should remember that social media is not intended to push

information; it’s for sharing interesting content and building relationships with online followers.

Social media channels help bridge the information gap for people who know very little about the

military in general. Air Force Instruction 1-1, Air Force Standards, outlines how Airmen can

use social networking sites.

All Airmen are reminded to maintain appropriate respect in their communications and conduct

with other Airmen whether they are face to face or connected via social media. Showing respect

does not squelch your voice—it enhances the impact of what you share and reflects the high

standards of conduct and discipline that are part of the military culture. Respect is reflected in

everything you post to social media: your photos, videos, posts, and comments you post to

blogs. What you reflect online says a great deal about your values and beliefs and cumulatively

creates a public portrait of the Air Force. The Tongue and Quill suggests that Airmen paint a

portrait of the Air Force they are proud to show to the public; Airmen are encouraged to tell their

unique Air Force stories.

Things to Consider when using Social Media:

1. Airmen are encouraged to tell their unique Air Force stories.

a. You are personally responsible for what you say and post—in all media at all times.

b. Be honest about your unit and mission (without violating OPSEC).

c. Consider how a post can be interpreted by the public.

2. Be cautious with the line between “funny” and “distasteful.”

a. Your “funny” may be “distasteful” or offensive to others—see 1.a., above.

b. When in doubt, err on the side of caution and leave it out.

3. Respect yourself, other Airmen, and your Air Force with what you post: the spoken word

can never be taken back; social media magnifies this fact.

Emerging Social Media Trends

More social sharing options: Blogs, status updates, tweets, pins, videos, photos and pod casts

are used to share thoughts and ideas with global social media users. The emergence of social

sharing brings together all of these communication products to provide Airmen and the general

public with multiple avenues for discussing trending topics.

Visual content reigns supreme: Social media conversations have morphed from text-based

posts to status updates using photos, graphic illustrations and videos. Social networking

websites are optimizing their designs to focus more on photos and video to allow users to tell

their stories visually.

Mobile platforms and applications are booming: Telephones have evolved into modern

multi-functional smartphones capable of taking photos and videos that can be uploaded to many

social networking websites. Social apps are helping mobile and tablet users connect with friends

and family members so they can share real-time information from any location.

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Emoticons. Social media and e-mail messages frequently include emotional icon or emoticons

within the text of the message to convey a sense of emotion that would be evident if the message

were delivered face to face. Emoticons can be very useful; but their use should be restricted to

personal messages—they have no place in official communications.

Common Social Media Platforms and Terms

Platforms:

• Blogs: Websites with regular entries of commentary, descriptions of events or other

material such as graphics or video (e.g., WordPress, TypePad).

• Microblogs: People share content in a limited message format using status updates,

links, photos and video.

• Location-based social networks: Allows users to check-in and connect with people as

they explore a particular place (e.g., Foursquare).

• Photo sharing: Use a website to host and share images (e.g., Flickr, Instagram).

• Video sharing: Provides a location where users upload, share, and view videos.

• Social networking: Promotes social interaction among users through posts,

commentaries, links, photos and videos.

• Social news and bookmarking: A forum where users share social news trends. It’s

common to see social news feeds combine social bookmarking on news-related items.

This allows users to manage content by preferences.

• Visual bookmarking: A unique platform that uses a “visual” bookmark to allow users

to share Web links to information through imagery.

Terms:

• Circles: Groups and organizes friends, colleagues and acquaintances on Google™+.

• Hangout: Video service on Google™+ that allows you to video chat with up to 10

Google™+ users at a time.

• Internet Meme: An idea or concept that is shared be-tween people online.

• Pin: An image or video added to a Pinterest® board and shared with other users.

• Board: Organizes pins on Pinterest® by topic.

• Timeline: Area on your personal Face book account that allows you to display photos,

videos and posts by event date.

• Twitter® chat: Discussion that occurs on Twitter® around a specific hashtag at a

specified date and time.

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Social Media Tips

The following tips are not exhaustive, but they are a good starting point for Airmen to consider

when using social media. Most of these tips are merely extensions of what we have learned

through years of good staff work and the emergence of e-mail. The principles of obeying the

law, being you, respect and personal security still apply in today’s social media environment.

1. Obey applicable laws. You are an Airman 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. As such,

you must obey federal law, DoD directives, Air Force instructions, and the Uniform Code

of Military Justice when using social media. This applies when using social media in

either official or unofficial capacities.

a. Classified information. Do not post classified, sensitive or For Official Use Only

information. If in doubt talk to your supervisor or security manager.

b. Copyrights and Trademarks. Do not post any information or other material

protected by copyright without the permission of the copyright owner. Likewise, do

not use any words, logos or other marks that would infringe upon the trademark,

service mark, certification mark or other intellectual property rights of the owners of

such marks without owner permission.

c. Air Force symbol. The Air Force symbol visually represents our service’s brand

identity. To use the Air Force symbol on a social media platform, you must follow

display guidelines found at http://www.trademark.af.mil.

d. Terms of service. Comply with each social media site’s terms of service.

2. Be you. Represent yourself and only yourself in your social media use.

a. Stay in your lane. Discussing issues related to your career field or personal

experiences are acceptable and encouraged. Stay in your lane and do not discuss

areas where you have no expertise through direct experience, education or

knowledge.

b. Endorsements. Represent only yourself and do not use the Air Force name to

endorse or promote products, political positions or religious ideologies.

c. Impersonations. Do not manipulate social media identifiers or post content in an

attempt to disguise, impersonate or otherwise misrepresent your identity with any

other person or entity.

d. Promotion for personal or financial gain. Do not use your Air Force affiliation,

official title or position to promote, endorse or benefit yourself or any profit-making

group or agency. See the Joint Ethics Regulation for more details on the ethics and

law regarding the “Use of Public Office for Private Gain.”

3. Respect, respect, respect. Do not post anything hateful, offensive or illegal. This

includes any defamatory, libelous, vulgar, obscene, abusive, profane, threatening, racially

or ethnically hateful, or otherwise offensive or illegal information or material.

a. Words have meaning and consequences. Once you post something on social media

it is impossible to “get it back.” Even deleting the post doesn’t mean it’s truly gone.

Ultimately, you bear sole responsibility for what you post.

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b. Replace error with fact. When you see misrepresentations in social media, identify

and correct the error with facts and respect.

c. Image. Any time you use social media, you’re presenting an image of yourself and

the Air Force. Don’t discredit yourself or our service

d. Opinion versus official information. Yes, tell them what you think, just make sure

you state that this is your opinion and not that of the organization.

e. Privacy. Do not post any information that would infringe upon the proprietary,

privacy or personal rights of others. Respect their privacy and expect the same.

4. Personal security. Maintain privacy settings on your social media accounts, change

your passwords regularly and don’t give out personally identifiable information. Be

cautious about the personal details you share with others—live or in social media.

Official Air Force Social Media Sites

The Air Force Social Media Program includes key social networking websites where the Air

Force engages with Airmen, families and the general public. Here are a few links to official Air

Force social media pages:

• Social Media Directory. http://www.af.mil/socialmedia.asp

• Air Force Live Blog. http://airforcelive.dodlive.mil

• Facebook®. http://facebook.com/usairforce

• Flickr®. http://www.flickr.com/airforce

• Twitter®. http://www.twitter.com/airforce

• YouTube

. http://www.youtube.com/afbluetube

• Vine® (for mobile iOS & Android devices). @usairforce

• Instagram®. http://instagram.com/officialusairforce

Instant Messaging (IM) and Texting

Instant Messaging (IM) and Texting, once leisure communications activities, have obtained a

foothold in the Air Force workplace. When utilized appropriately, IM and Texting can lead to

great efficiencies—they can offer advantages over both e-mail and voice conversations and they

allow individuals to multitask. Simple questions between co-workers, previously requiring

telephone conversations or in-person meetings, can be completed with a single IM or text

exchange. On the flip side, they can quickly become a distraction in the workplace with

individuals using IM and Texting it outside of their original purpose. The following tips will

help you be a responsible user of IM and Texting in the workplace and should sound very

familiar when compared to the advantages and disadvantages of electronic communications

discussed in the opening of this chapter.

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• IM and Texting do not replace staff work. While IM can be used for official Air Force

business, it does not replace official staff work. If your work requires an official record

to be maintained, use e-mail or another means to accomplish your duties.

• IM and Texting are typically not enduring. While you can save your IM history, if

your work requires an official record to be maintained, another method, such as e-mail,

may be more appropriate.

• IM and Texting can be a distracter. Users should be careful to not use IM as a leisure

activity. Doing so will lead to decreased productivity in the workplace.

• IM and Texting are quick and easy. E-mails can get buried and lost. If you need an

immediate quick answer to a question, IM is a better choice than e-mail. IM can replace

some phone conversations which can save you time.

• IM and Texting are best utilized for one-on-one discussion. If you have a large

audience, e-mail is better suited to meet those needs than IM or Texting (in general).

Telephones, Voice Mail and Fax

Telephones, voice mail, and fax are key tools for staff communication, so we’ll review some of

the common courtesies associated with using this equipment. Different systems have different

features, so check out your manual for all the bells and whistles. Here are some basic guidelines.

Telephone Protocol: Answering the Phone (Do … )

• answer the phone on the first ring and in the way you would like to be called after

identifying the organization.

• be pleasant and professional—you are representing your organization, as well as yourself,

when you answer the phone.

• introduce everyone in the room if you are on a speakerphone—callers may object to the

lack of privacy.

• put the radio and TV on hold until you’re off.

• speak clearly, keeping your lips about 1 inch from the mouthpiece. Good posture or

standing while speaking) will also improve your vocal quality.

• have a pencil, a memo pad, and your directories within easy reach.

• adjust your speaking tempo to match the other person’s to establish instant rapport.

• ask if someone else can help if the person isn’t there.

• take a number and call back instead of putting them on hold if you are finding something.

• give the caller the phone number before you transfer the call.

• allow the person initiating the call to bring it to a close.

• record important conversations, especially those that result in a decision, in a memo for

record and place it in a file.

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Telephone Protocol: Answering the Phone (Do NOT … )

• transfer an angry caller. Listen carefully, never interrupt, and ask questions that require

more than a “yes” or “no.” Take notes and let the caller know; this shows you’re

interested and are willing to help.

• put the phone over your chest to put someone on hold—your voice goes over the wires

loud and clear—use the “hold” button.

Telephone Protocol: Making the Call (Do … )

• have your act together. Organize your thoughts and make notes before you place a call—

especially if you’re representing your organization, seeking help or information, calling

long distance or talking to someone more senior in rank.

• call during core hours (0900-1100 and 1300-1500) to reduce phone tag. What’s their

time zone? When will they return?

• identify yourself and your organization before asking to speak to ________.

• be pleasant and professional.

• ask if the person has time to talk, but you need to keep it as brief as possible.

• record important conversations in a memo for record and place it in a file.

Telephone Protocol: Making the Call (Do NOT … )

• put the phone over your chest to put someone on hold—your voice goes over the wires

loud and clear—use the “hold” button.

• be the source of someone else’s problem; courtesy works wonders in both directions.

Voice-mail Protocol (Do…)

• record the message in your own voice.

• identify yourself and your organization.

• check your system regularly.

• return all messages as quickly as possible.

Voice-mail Protocol (Do NOT … )

• leave amusing messages on an official system.

• leave personally identifiable information (PII) on voice-mail.

• assume your voice-mail is a substitute for answering your phone.

Voice-mail Protocol: Out of Office

If you will be unavailable for an extended period, set up your voice mail to be mindful of co-

workers by going to voice mail on the first ring and being helpful to callers by identifying whom

they can contact for assistance in your absence: “This is SSgt_____. I am away from my desk.

If you need immediate assistance on [topic], please call MSgt ______ at DSN 555-1234.”

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FAX Protocol (Do … )

• make it readable: use Times New Roman and 12 points or larger font

• number your pages.

• protect your document by ensuring correct receiver information is entered.

• use black and white.

• use a fax when you cannot get someone to return your call, including a short explanation,

deadline to return your call, and a “Thanks for your time.”

• send a return cover sheet with complete return address to encourage a quick reply.

FAX Protocol (Do NOT … )

• send a legal-sized document unless you know it can be received.

• send personal, confidential or financial info unless you know it will be protected.

• use italic and thin-faced font types. It looks ragged and makes it difficult to read.

This brings us to the end of the general rules and principles for using electronic communications.

The following glossary may be of use to those who are new to electronic communications or

those wishing to look back on these terms in the future.

SUMMARY: To summarize this chapter in a single sentence, good face-to-face manners extend

into the electronic media realm and these manners are captured by the Computer Ethics

Institute’s “Ten Commandments for Computer Ethics,” below.

The Ten Commandments for Computer Ethics

1. Thou shalt not use a computer to harm other people.

2. Thou shalt not interfere with other people’s computer work.

3. Thou shalt not snoop around in other people’s files.

4. Thou shalt not use a computer to steal.

5. Thou shalt not use a computer to bear false witness.

6. Thou shalt not use or copy software for which you have not paid.

7. Thou shalt not use other people’s computer resources without authorization.

8. Thou shalt not appropriate other people’s intellectual output.

9. Thou shalt think about the social consequences of the program you write.

10. Thou shalt use a computer in ways that show consideration and respect.

SOURCE: http://computerethicsinstitute.org/publications/tencommandments.html.

Used in accordance with guidance from the Computer Ethics Institute.

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Electronic Communications Glossary

American Standard Code for Information Interchange (ASCII /ˈæski/ ASS-kee)—The most

common international standard for representing alphanumeric text on a computer.

bandwidth—The number of bits that can be passed along a communications channel in a given

period of time. Usually expressed as bits per second (bps). Each military installation has a

limited amount of bandwidth—don’t waste it with frivolous e-mail.

bulletin-board system (BBS)—An electronic system allowing individuals with similar interests

to post and view messages in a public electronic form.

binary file—A digital file format used to store non-text data. The information stored includes

executable programs, sounds, images and videos.

binary digit (bit)—The smallest unit of storage in a digital computer. All programs and data in

a digital computer are composed of bits.

browser—A software program that allows users to interact with World Wide Websites.

Example includes Microsoft Internet Explorer, Mozilla and Opera.

client—A computer or program that can download, run or request services from a server.

compact disc (CD, CD-ROM, CD-RW)—A disk that stores digital information using a pattern

of microscopic pits and lands to represent ones and zeros. One CD-ROM holds from 650 to 700

megabytes of data or the equivalent of approximately 250,000 pages of text.

data compression—A procedure used to reduce the size of a file to reduce the disk space

required to store the file or the bandwidth required to transmit the file. Many different

compression formats are available and each requires a program to compress and expand the

file—zip format is one of the most common.

digital video disk (DVD, DVD-R, DVD-RW)—A disk that stores digital information using a

pattern of pits and lands to represent ones and zeros. A specially formatted DVD is used to store

movies. One DVD-ROM holds approximately 4.7 gigabytes of information or the equivalent of

approximately 1.8 million pages of text.

Electronic mail (E-mail)—A message sent electronically over a computer network, such as a

LAN or the Internet.

emoticon—Facial expressions originally drawn using ASCII characters and more recently drawn

using an extended character set.

encryption—Changing the contents of a message in a manner to obscure the contents while still

allowing the intended audience to read the message.

executable—A file containing a set of instructions to perform some process on a computer. A

word processor and Internet browser are examples of an executable.

facsimile (fax)—A method of transmitting images of printed matter that predates digital

computer networks. This method traditionally used phone lines but can now be implemented

using computer networks.

flame mail—An e-mail message critical of some person or position taken by a person,usually

more derogatory than constructive.

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frequently asked questions (FAQ)—A list of questions and corresponding answers focusing on

a specific topic. The FAQ is typically provided to members of a community to avoid the

repetitious answering of questions asked by new users.

home page—The web page providing the entry point for a website (see web page and website).

hyperlink—A way to link access to information of various sources together within a web

document. A way to connect two Internet resources via a simple word or phrase on which a user

can click to start a connection.

hypertext—A method for storing, retrieving, and presenting information based on the

processing power of computers. Allows computerized linking and almost instantaneous retrieval

of information based on a dynamic index.

Hypertext Markup Language (HTML)—The native language of the WWW.

Instant Messaging (IM)—A type of communications service that enables you to create a kind of

private chat room with another individual in order to communicate in real time over the Internet,

analogous to a telephone conversation but using text-based, not voice-based, communication.

Typically, the instant messaging system alerts you whenever somebody on your private list is

online. You can then initiate a chat session with that particular individual.

Internet—The overarching global computer network connecting computers, servers and local

area networks across the globe.

intranet—A network with restricted availability. An intranet may provide web pages, printing

and e-mail services similar to those available using the Internet, but only for a restricted set of

users. Most military bases run an intranet that is only available to personnel on that base.

Internet Relay Chat (IRC)—A communications program that allows real-time text-based

conversations along multiple users.

list server—A computer running an electronic mailing list subscribed to by individuals with

some common area of interest. Individuals typically subscribe by sending an e-mail asking to be

placed on the list. Once added to the list, subscribers automatically receive messages sent to the

list by other subscribers and may send their own messages to the list which are then relayed to all

other subscribers.

local area network (LAN)—A system occupying a relatively small geographic area providing

digital communications between automated data processing equipment, such as computers and

printers.

modem—A device allowing a computer to send and receive data over telephone lines.

netiquette—Commonly accepted etiquette used when communicating over a computer

network—network etiquette. Specific forms of communications might include e-mail, list server

or IRC.

newbie—An individual new to using computers or new to a specific group.

newsgroup—A network service allowing individuals to post, read messages, and respond to

messages posted by other users. Newsgroups may be moderated or un-moderated. If the

newsgroup is moderated, messages may be removed by the moderator and user posting

privileges controlled by the moderator.

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organizational e-mail account—An e-mail account used to receive and send messages on

behalf of an organization. This type of account allows an organization to maintain a single

address for correspondence despite changing responsibilities within that organization.

server—A computer that responds to requests for information from client computers—see client.

web browser—See browser.

web page—An electronic document available on the Internet or an intranet that is viewable

using a web browser (see browser, Internet and intranet).

website—A collection of related web pages.

World Wide Web (WWW)—The entire web pages on all of the websites available through the

Internet.

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CHAPTER 13:

Meetings

This chapter covers:

• Planning an Effective Meeting

• Running Your Meeting

• Group Dynamics and Fun

All of us attend meetings. Some of us feel we attend too many of them. Others may be

conducting more business electronically and attending fewer meetings than in the past. But, in

today’s world of trying to do things “faster and smarter,” technology is not always all it’s

cracked up to be. How many times have you e-mailed someone who works 20 feet or one office

away? Have you ever spent 20 minutes to write an e-mail to four people to discuss a topic that

would take 2 minutes of a meeting? Despite the surge in electronic staffing, there is no substitute

for the human element found in meetings; thus it is unlikely they will ever be completely

replaced.

So why does the mere word “meeting” strike a nerve in so many of us? Perhaps because we’ve

all attended so many that were so inefficient. But meetings don’t have to be that way; there are

ways to make them better! If they are done right, they can go a long way in helping your

organization run more efficiently. Simply put, meetings are used to share information, solve

problems, plan, brainstorm or motivate. Whatever the purpose, it’s good to know some basics

about conducting an effective meeting. That’s what this chapter is all about.

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Planning an Effective Meeting

At some time or another, you may be the one calling the meeting. A meeting doesn’t always

have to be a major production, but there are some key points to consider during planning,

execution and follow-up. Here are some tips on making the most of everyone’s time—including

your own!

Success or failure in a meeting can usually be traced to the planning phase. Do your homework

and you’re well on your way to success. If you don’t do your homework, you’ll pay a heavy

price during the execution and follow-up phases.

Listed below are the key issues associated with planning a meeting. As you step through these

items, remember to check on what is standard operating procedure in your organization.

Meetings vary from totally spontaneous to highly structured and ceremonial. Most are in the

middle. If this group has been meeting regularly for a while, try to find out how they’ve done

business in the past.

1. Decide If a Meeting Is Appropriate

In the book How to Make Meetings Work, Michael Doyle and David Strauss identify seven

situations when having a meeting might be a good idea:

• You want information or advice from the group.

• You want to involve a group in solving a problem or making a decision.

• An issue needs to be clarified.

• You want to address concerns with the entire group.

• The group itself wants a meeting.

• There is a problem that involves people from different groups.

• There is a problem, but it’s not clear what it is or who is responsible for dealing with it.

In these situations, face-to-face discussion can help speed up the process. If your goal is just to

pass on information, ask yourself if e-mail is a viable and appropriate substitute for the meeting.

The purpose of many meetings is simply to share information and keep people up to date on a

project. In these cases, try to substitute the meeting with an e-mail. This saves everyone’s time

and still keeps everyone in the loop and you’re still meeting the goal for the meeting you just

avoided! Local policy may dictate that some groups meet weekly, monthly, or quarterly, but if

you’re not directed to meet and don’t need to … don’t!

2. Define Your Purpose

Most Air Force professionals want to feel like they’ve accomplished something in a meeting. A

clear purpose for the meeting is the first step towards success. If the meeting has no purpose,

you shouldn’t meet. When you think about your purpose, try to define it in terms of a product

that you want at the end of the meeting. “Talking about Issue X” is not an ideal purpose

statement for the meeting because it describes a process, not a product—try these alternatives:

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• To identify why Issue X is a problem.

[The product is a clearer understanding of the problem.]

• To brainstorm ways to resolve Issue X.

[The product is a list of ideas about potential solutions.]

• To discuss different options for resolving Issue X.

[The product is list of pros and cons … the decision will happen later.]

• To decide how the unit will handle Issue X.

[The product is discussion of pros and cons and a decision. Make sure attendees know

who makes the decision. Is it the team, or is it the boss?]

3. Decide Who Should Be Invited

Have you gone to a meeting and after 5 or 10 minutes asked yourself, “Why am I here?”

Remember that when you are holding a meeting! Invite only those directly involved in the issues

being discussed. Meetings can be a time waster if too many or too few participants attend. Too

many people equals chaos; too few means decisions have to be put on hold. If you’re trying to

solve a problem or make a decision on a controversial issue, make sure you have adequate

representation from all groups who have a voice in the decision. If you only invite people with

one point of view, your meeting will run smoothly, but your decision may not stand up later.

4. Decide Where and When the Meeting Should Occur

Check the schedules of key personnel. Often the scheduling of your meetings will be

determined by the schedule of any key personnel that will be attending. If you’re briefing a

three-star, odds are that his secretary will be telling you when the meeting can occur, not the

other way around.

If possible, pick the time of day to meet your purpose. If you’ve got flexibility, you might

select the time of day for your meeting to help you meet your objectives. If you want your

meeting attendees fired up and eager to contribute, you may want to schedule a meeting in the

morning, the time when most people have more energy. If you want them inpatient and anxious

to get done, try just before lunch. If you want them agreeable, try right after lunch. If you want

them asleep, try midafternoon. Finally, you might try the just-before-quitting time tactic. If

you’re lucky, you might have any opposition collapse just so they can catch the car pool.

Try to avoid meetings the first thing Monday morning. Give folks some time to read e-mail

and prioritize the days and week ahead. If your organization is a service organization, don’t

schedule meetings during customer service hours. The “Closed for Training” sign on the door

does not fare well in the customer satisfaction department!

Keep it under an hour, or plan for breaks. Keep in mind that after 20 minutes or so, our

minds tend to get lazy and wander. Try to keep the flow of the meeting going so that no agenda

item goes longer than 20 minutes. Watch the clock (a timekeeper comes in handy). Try to keep

the meeting to 90 minutes or less and plan for breaks if the meeting goes over an hour.

Reserve the room. Follow established procedures to reserve a conference room that can handle

the attendee list.

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5. Plan for Capturing Meeting Information

If this is not a routine meeting with an appointed recorder, take a moment to think about how you

will capture the meeting information, both during the meeting and afterwards. Capturing the

information is critical, but how best to do it will depend on the nature of the meeting. For

example, during the meeting there may be tools and activities that can help you capture

information, such as white boards, interactive whiteboards, recording devices, , photographs of

notes, poster boards and flip charts, etc. Also, consider having someone dedicated to capturing

notes. Just ask a team member or coworker to act as the recorder and take notes.

Meeting minutes capture the process and outcome of the meeting. They “close the loop” on the

meeting and let the attendees know what was decided. If you have administrative personnel that

can prepare minutes, consider having them attend the meeting to act as the recorder. If not,

appoint someone to capture the minutes or prepare them yourself.

6. Send Out an Agenda

Create an agenda and send it to attendees no later than 1 or 2 days prior to the meeting. If this is

not a time critical issue, if the attendees don’t work for you, or if you are asking people to

present material or review long documents prior to the meeting, try to give at least a week’s

notice. Also tell presenters to bring a copy of their material to leave with the recorder.

The agenda should include the date, time, location and purpose of the meeting. This advance

notice gives everyone an opportunity to prepare their thoughts and know where the meeting is

going ahead of time. If you are asking people to present material or prepare their thoughts, make

sure they know how much time they have been allocated and when they will present.

Presenting material at a meeting

At some time or another, you may be asked to present information at a meeting, possibly in

a briefing format. Whether or not you have time to prepare, it’s always important to

remember the “Seven Steps for Effective Communication” introduced in chapter 2.

A meeting is just another communication platform and it’s still important to analyze your

purpose and audience, research your topic, support your ideas, organize, draft, edit and

seek feedback. If you don’t, you may fail to hit the target, lead the audience to an

unproductive place, or worst case scenario, waste everyone’s time.

You may also want to use a detailed agenda on the day of the meeting to keep the group on track

and stay focused. If you have trouble coming up with a solid agenda, chances are you really

don’t have a reason to meet in the first place (see tip 1)!

7. Meetings Can Be Cancelled

Before you take people away from productive work time, ask yourself these questions:

• Is there a real need for this meeting? Perhaps the business can be accomplished by other

means. Consider sending an e-mail or a memo to disseminate information.

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• Will the decision makers and the majority of the group be present? If decision makers

can’t be there, why bother? Likewise, if the majority of the group cannot attend, why

hold the meeting? You will spend precious time updating those who missed the meeting

before you can come to consensus on the issue. It’s better to put the meeting on hold.

Running Your Meeting

You won’t peg out anyone’s fun meter by dragging a meeting out unnecessarily. It’s your job to

keep it focused and separate “the wheat from the chaff.”

A word about Robert’s Rules of Order

Formal meetings sometimes follow the sequence, procedures and terminology documented in

Robert's Rules of Order, a set of rules used in Parliamentary procedure. General Henry M.

Robert first published the rules in 1876 and there are several updated versions and summaries

available in print or on the web. (For example, the complete 1915 version is available on line

at http://www.bartleby.com/176/).

Most Air Force meetings do not use Robert’s Rules of Order and we won’t go into them here.

The terminology is somewhat formal and the structure seems overly constraining to some.

Even so, you should be aware that they exist as agreed-upon set of guidelines on how to

organize a potentially chaotic situation.

Also, some day you may find yourself in a meeting where there are a lot of rules, where

people read out the minutes of the previous meeting and where parts of the meeting seem

scripted (“With a quorum present, the meeting is called to order…”). If this happens to you,

don’t panic. They’re probably following some form of Robert’s Rules of Order. Ask about

them, or look them up yourself. Everything will become clear.

Start on Time; Stay on Time

Start on time with an upbeat note and don’t wait for tardy attendees. Spend meeting time wisely

to accomplish the goal for the meeting. Experienced meeting organizers suggest the following

time allocation for meetings:

• 1/4 of meeting—past agenda items and follow-up (old business)

• 1/2 of meeting—current agenda items

• 1/4 of meeting—future agenda items

Follow Your Agenda

One of the worst things you can do is to ignore your own agenda. It drives people nuts!

Consider a review of the detailed agenda in the opening minutes of the meeting to remind people

of the goals and plan for the meeting. Regular meetings usually follow a fixed order of business.

Below is a typical example:

1. Introduction and call to order.

2. Attendance or roll call of members present.

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3. Acknowledgment or correction of previous meeting minutes.

4. Reports from committees [these items were previously identified in the Agenda].

5. Old Business from previous minutes and Action Items.

6. New Business previously designated for consideration at this meeting [per Agenda].

7. Round table or New Business not previously identified for consideration at this meeting.

8. Appointments and Assignments [new committees or personnel changes].

9. Establish the date, time and location of the next meeting, if needed and if ready.

10. Evaluate the meeting before adjourning. Are there things that need to be improved?

Understand Group Dynamics and Look for Ways to Make Meetings Fun

If you’re in charge of a group that will be meeting over a period of time, it pays to learn the

basics about group dynamics. Also, if you dare, you might want to try to inject some fun into

your meetings. As always—know your audience.

Following Up: Preparing Meeting Minutes

If you did your homework, following up is a snap—it involves sending out meeting minutes and

starting the whole cycle over again. Prepare meeting minutes in the official memo format.

Minutes are a clear summary of the agenda items, decisions made and participants’ comments.

The meeting minutes document planned or completed actions and information regarding any

future meeting is in the last paragraph. When a person signs a paper as a member of a board or

committee, the signature element indicates that person’s status on that board or committee, not

any other position the person may hold. Type “Approved as written” two lines below the

recorder’s signature block, followed by the approving authority’s signature block.

Formatting Meeting Minutes. All formatting should be neat and orderly, paying particular

attention to uniformity of margins and text. Minutes usually show that a meeting was scheduled

for a specific date, time, location, the members present and absent, the order of the agenda,

actions taken or decisions made, and any pending tasks. It should be clear to readers the name of

the body (The Executive Steering Committed), the kind of meeting held (regular or special), and

the word “Minutes” should appear in the subject line. The opening paragraph usually contains a

simple statement that includes many of these identifying details, such as “The Executive Steering

Committee held a regular meeting on (day, date, time, and place).

Meeting minutes are formatted either single or double-spaced, with additional space between

items of business and paragraphs. All names should be spelled correctly. Acceptable grammar

should be used; sentences should be well constructed and correctly punctuated; and all verbs

should be in the past tense. The narrative should include key points, conclusions or decisions

regarding any committee reports, old business carry-over items, current business and new

business. The last item of the minutes should state when the meeting was adjourned.

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Group Dynamics and Fun

All meetings, teams or groups move through predictable stages. You will save yourself a lot of

frustration if you are familiar with these stages. Let’s look at a snapshot of these stages of group

dynamics first then discuss them in more detail.

Group Dynamics

Because the forming, storming and norming stages result in minimal output, it is tempting to try

to rush through or short circuit these stages and hope the team can thereby achieve peak

productivity. You may want to stand up and say, “Can’t we just all be friends?” Although

seductive, this idea is dysfunctional. Just as individuals go through predictable stages of growth

(depending on age, experience, maturity and other factors), teams go through predictable stages.

The duration of these stages depends on factors such as individual and team maturity, task

complexity, leadership, organizational climate and external climate. Teams can fixate at various

stages. Some teams (like some people) are never fully functioning. How can you reduce the

nonproductive time commonly spent in the forming and storming stages? Given that these stages

are inevitable, try sharing rumors, concerns and expectations of the team to minimize their

tensions, fears or anxiety. Also, encourage the team members to contact one another so that

there will be no “surprises.” Therefore, an atmosphere of trust will be achieved early on

(norming stage), allowing for interpersonal issues to be put aside in favor of task issues and for

the team to move on to the performing stage. Read on for more detailed descriptions of these

stages from The Team Handbook written by Peter R. Scholtes.

Group Dynamics

FORMING



STORMING



NORMING



PERFORMING

Forming: a period of uncertainty in which members try to determine their place in the team

and the procedures and rules of the team. When a team is forming, members cautiously

explore the boundaries of acceptable group behavior. This is a stage of transition from

individual to member status and of testing the leader’s guidance both formally and informally.

Because there is so much going on to distract the members’ attention in the beginning, the team

accomplishes little, if anything, that concerns its project goals. Don’t despair and flush your

project down the toilet! This is perfectly normal!

Storming: conflicts begin to arise as members resist the influence of the team and rebel

against accomplishing the task. Storming is probably the most difficult stage for the team. You

may ask yourself, “What was I thinking?” The team members begin to realize the task is

different and more difficult than they imagined, becoming testy, blameful, or overzealous.

Impatient about the lack of progress, but still too inexperienced to know much about decision

making or the scientific approach, members argue about just what actions the team should take.

They try to rely solely on their experience, resisting any need for collaborating with other team

members. Their behavior means team members have little energy to spend on progressing

towards the team’s goal. Still, they are beginning to understand one another.

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Norming: the team establishes cohesiveness and commitment, discovering new ways to work

together and setting norms for appropriate behavior. During this stage, members reconcile

competing loyalties and responsibilities. They accept the team, team ground rules (or “norms”),

their roles in the team and the individuality of fellow members. Emotional conflict is reduced as

previously competitive relationships become more cooperative. As team members begin to work

out their differences, they now have more time and energy to spend on the project. Thus, they

are able to at last start making significant strides.

Performing: the team develops proficiency in achieving its goals and becomes more flexible in

its patterns of working together. By this stage, the team has settled its relationships and

expectations. They can begin performing—diagnosing and solving problems and choosing and

implementing changes. At last team members have discovered and accepted each other’s

strengths and weaknesses and learned what their roles are. The team is now an effective,

cohesive unit. You can tell when your team has reached this stage: you get a lot of work done!

Fun

Have you ever wondered why cell phones miraculously ring during meetings or “scheduling

conflicts” come up at the last minute? It’s because many people avoid meetings like the plague.

Does that mean you should hold meetings like a standup comedian to draw people to the

meeting? No! But you can interject some fun into meetings to encourage participation and

creativity. Here are just a few ideas to get you going.

Hold your meeting off-site. Military members are creatures of habit, and this does not change

at meetings. Folks usually sit in the same seat and bring the same coffee mug. Sometimes a

change of scenery will rejuvenate a stagnant group. Bonus: Change the meeting time to

coincide with lunch. This gives the group a chance to talk about “non-meeting issues” and

connect in a more nonthreatening environment over a meal.

Have a contest to generate ideas for projects. A little friendly competition can be a boost for

all and bring great results.

Tone down the conversation dominators with “fees.” Attendees are required to pay each time

they interject and they are limited to inputs. Be careful with this one … you don’t want to shut

folks down either.

Appoint a “Director of Creativity” for each meeting to come up with ideas like these! Appoint

the next meeting’s director at the conclusion of the current meeting to give them time to plan.

Have the group vote on the favorite idea at the end of the year and give out a humorous award.

SUMMARY: Meetings are a fact of life and service in the Air Force. They serve a purpose in

our mission and how we get things done. This chapter gave you the basics for holding more

productive meetings. The “Seven Steps for Effective Communication” and the tips introduced in

this chapter will serve you well alongside any local guidelines your command has for conducting

meetings.

PART VI:

Document Standards

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PART VI:

DOCUMENT STANDARDS

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Document Standards: Part VI expands upon the functions of written communications and their

formats within the United States Air Force as outlined in AFMAN 33-326, Preparing Official

Communications. We have included examples of Air Force documents to demonstrate the Air

Force standards presented in this publication. However, if your command publishes a

supplement to AFMAN 33-326, an operating instruction (OI) on document standards, or has

its own administrative style guide or preferences, check those sources for guidance on

preparing documents before you begin.

Writing for the Boss: Preparing a staff package, memorandum or personal letter for a senior

official’s signature demands the product be ready to sign. Write as though every letter were

being signed or read well up the chain of command. Consider these tips to improve your written

work:

• Check for preferences. Contact the senior official’s office staff before you start to see if

the official has preferences—and get some pointers! For example, the choice of words in

the salutation and closing may be different depending on the rank of the recipient.

• Analyze purpose and Audience (Step 1 of Seven Steps to Effective Communication).

What is the desired purpose? What are the issues (core and peripheral)? Who is the

audience? What tone, organizational pattern and correspondence style are most

appropriate? Also, use critical thinking skills as you draft. What is the relationship of the

sender to the receiver? What are the first, second and third order effects of the package?

• Keep it simple. Get to the point, make it and move on. Your first draft will probably be

twice as long as needed. If you must include details, use attachments.

• Go easy on the modifiers. A senior official doesn’t need to be very interested in

something—being interested is sufficient. Avoid emotional tones.

• Quality control. Logic, grammar, facts, figures and format must all be checked,

re-checked then checked again. Your credibility is on the line: make it count.

• Addresses. Use the correct and current address; avoid embarrassment and delays!

• Go one step further. Look efficient when doing a personal letter and, if appropriate,

provide the general with the “go-by” name of the addressee on a yellow sticky.

Remember to exercise sensitivity in the case of a condolence letter to a spouse or family

member.

• Be realistic. Don’t expect your product to fly the first time; set pride aside and welcome

the feedback so you can get it right the next time.

Why should we write differently for senior officials? We shouldn’t—we should write right all

the time. Write high-quality products for all your written communications, and we will all be

better communicators for the effort—and it will make that staff tour less daunting as well.

CHAPTER 14

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CHAPTER 14:

The Official Memorandum

This chapter covers:

• The Heading Section

• The Text of the Official Memorandum

• The Closing Section

• Additional Information

• Attachments

• The Official Memorandum: Examples

• Spelling Checkers: Before You Sign

Memorandums are used to communicate throughout the DoD and with other Federal agencies as

well as to conduct official business outside the Government with vendors or contractors when a

personal letter is inappropriate. Official memorandums may be addressed to specific officials,

single offices, multiple offices, multiple offices IN TURN or to DISTRIBUTION lists. Follow

the guidance of this chapter when preparing any official memorandum, beginning with these

basic format requirements:

1. Use printed letterhead, computer-generated letterhead, or plain bond paper.

2. Type or print using black ink.

3. Follow AFI 31-401, Information Security Program Management, applicable executive

orders and DoD guidance for the necessary markings on classified correspondence.

4. Use 1-inch margins on the left, right and bottom for most memorandums. For shorter

communications, you may adjust the margins.

a. 20 lines or more  1 inch margins

b. 10-19 lines  1 to 1 1/2 inch margins

c. 1-9 lines  1 1/2 to 2 inch margins

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5. Use 12 point Times New Roman font for text. Smaller sizes, no smaller than 10 point,

may be used when required to control page breaks. For example, shrink the font of all

text in the memorandum to prevent a page break between the body and closing elements

(signature block). The signature block is never on a page by itself.

For most documents, the guidance for the specific elements on the following pages needs no

adjustments; however, for short communications, you may adjust the top margin in order to

balance the content toward the vertical center of the document by moving all elements from the

date to the last line of the closing to achieve visual balance and avoid a top-heavy appearance.

The Heading Section

The heading section is composed of these elements: date, MEMORANDUM FOR,

ATTENTION, FROM, SUBJECT and References. Each element is described in detail, below.

Date

Placement and Format: Place the date 1 inch from the right edge, 1.75 inches from the top

of the page. Use the “Day Month Year” or “DD Mmm YY” format for documents addressed to

a military organization. In the “DD Mmm YY” format, the month and year are both abbreviated

for consistency. For civilian addressees, use the “Month Day, Year” format. Finally, unless the

date of signature has legal significance, date the original and all copies of the correspondence at

the time of dispatch.

Examples:

Military Addressees–Day Month Year 15 October 2014

Military Addressees–DD Mmm YY 15 Oct 14

Civilian Addressees–Month Day, Year October 15, 2014

“MEMORANDUM FOR”

Placement: Place “MEMORANDUM FOR” on the second line below the date. Leave two

spaces between “MEMORANDUM FOR” and the recipient’s organization abbreviation

and office symbol (ORG/SYMBOL). If there are multiple recipients, two or three office

symbols may be placed on each line with the second and following lines aligned under the first

recipient. If there are numerous recipients, use the “DISTRIBUTION” element.

• When addressing one office, enter the organization/office symbol in uppercase letters.

To indicate the memorandum is for a specific person, enter the organization/office

symbol followed by the person’s rank and name in parentheses—all in uppercase.

Another option is to use the “ATTENTION” element—see guidance below.

• When addressing several offices, align subsequent addressees under the first address. If

the office symbols are fairly short and you have several for the memorandum, you may

include two or three on a single line by aligning each additional line of recipients under

the recipients in the first line in like fashion. Be consistent with your format: write out

all organization names or use all organization/office symbols.

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• When addressing several offices IN TURN, use the “IN TURN” format to distribute the

official memorandum to several individuals or offices in sequence. The only difference

is the format of the “MEMORANDUM FOR” element, as shown below.

o “IN TURN” Originators: Prepare an “IN TURN” memorandum when the final

addressee or OPR must see the coordination or action of all addressees. Use the

official memorandum format. Type “IN TURN” in uppercase, one line below the last

address of the “MEMORANDUM FOR” element aligned with the addresses.

o “IN TURN” Recipients: When you receive an “IN TURN” memorandum, strike

through your organization abbreviation and office symbol, then type, sign or initial,

and date. Type “Concur,” “Nonconcur,” “Comments attached” or “Comments sent

by separate correspondence to” next to the date. Prepare a separate memorandum for

a lengthy comment. Attach comments to the “IN TURN” memorandum if the

remaining addressees need them; otherwise, forward comments directly to the final

addressee. Forward the “IN TURN” memorandum to the next address and “cc” the

OPR for tracking purposes.

• Using a distribution element or list. When the address list is too long to include in the

“MEMORANDUM FOR” element, use the distribution element or list. Simply leave two

spaces after “MEMORANDUM FOR” and add “DISTRIBUTION” in uppercase letters.

Include the addressees in the “DISTRIBUTION” element or on a separate page attached

to the memorandum.

Headquarters or HQ: The term “Headquarters” and “HQ” are a part of the official title of units

at the group level and above. Use HQ as part of the organization abbreviation and office symbol

when corresponding with staff elements at MAJCOM and HQ USAF organizations. Do not use

the term “Headquarters” or “HQ” when corresponding with the office of MAJCOM

commanders and vice commanders.

Examples:

MEMORANDUM FOR 79 FS/DO (LT COL JORGE TORRES)

MEMORANDUM FOR CHIEF OF STAFF

DIRECTOR, INSTALLATIONS AND LOGISTICS

GENERAL COUNSEL

MEMORANDUM FOR 42 ABW/JA 42 ABW/SE 42 ABW/XP

[SECOND LINE] [SECOND LINE] [SECOND LINE]

[THIRD LINE] [THIRD LINE] [THIRD LINE]

MEMORANDUM FOR HQ USAF/A4 [This format applies to all field units when sending

HQ USAF/A3 memorandums to HQ USAF. Air Staff and

HQ USAF/A1 Secretary of the Air Force staff offices follow

IN TURN Headquarters Operating Instruction 33-3.]

MEMORANDUM FOR DISTRIBUTION

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“ATTENTION:”

Placement: The attention element is aligned under the address or office symbol in the

“MEMORANDUM FOR” line. The attention element is used when a memorandum is intended

for both an office and the attention of a specific person in that office. The format of the attention

element is to place “ATTENTION:” or “ATTN:” or “THROUGH:” with the abbreviated rank

and last name in uppercase on the line immediately below the “MEMORANDUM FOR” line.

Example:

MEMORANDUM FOR 36 FS/DO

ATTENTION: MAJ JONES

“FROM:”

Placement: Place “FROM:” in uppercase, flush with the left margin, on the second line below

the last line of the MEMORANDUM FOR element (or the ATTENTION element, if used).

After the “FROM:” element, leave two spaces followed by the organization abbreviation and

office symbol (ORG/SYMBOL) of the originator.

Contents: If the complete mailing address is printed on the letterhead or if all recipients are

located on the same installation as the originator, then only a single line FROM element

consisting of the organization abbreviation and office symbol is used.

If the complete mailing address is not printed on the letterhead or if the recipients are on another

installation, then the FROM element contains the full mailing address of the originator. This

enables recipients to easily prepare and address return correspondence.

• The first line of the FROM element includes the organization abbreviation and office

symbol separated by a virgule and typed in uppercase.

• The second line of the FROM element is the delivery address of the originator in upper

and lower case.

• The third line of the FROM element includes the city, state and ZIP+4 code (without a

comma between the city and state). For some installations, the city or installation name

may be used interchangeably, as shown in the examples, below. Consult your local

United States Post Office for details. The standard format for spacing between the state

abbreviation and the ZIP code is two spaces.

Examples:

FROM: 20 FW/CC [Sender and receiver on same installation]

FROM: HQ SOC/CC [Sender and receiver on different installations]

125 Chennault Circle

Montgomery AL 36112-6430 [City State option]

FROM: HQ SOC/CC [Sender and receiver on different installations]

125 Chennault Circle

Maxwell AFB AL 36112-6430 [Installation State option]

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“SUBJECT:”

Placement: In all uppercase letters place “SUBJECT:”, flush with the left margin, on the

second line below the last line of the FROM element. After “SUBJECT:”, type two spaces

followed by the title; capitalize the first letter of each word except articles, prepositions and

conjunctions. Be brief and clear to focus readers; if you need a second line, align it under the

first word of the subject.

• When writing about an individual/employee who is not the addressee, include rank/grade

and full name in the subject line. If you refer to the person again in the text of the

memorandum, use only the rank/grade and surname.

• Do not include names in the subject line when writing about two or more individuals.

• When writing about several people, state their full names with rank/grade in the text of

the memorandum the first time the names appear.

• SUSPENSE items: Include the suspense date in the subject line by typing “SUSPENSE:”

or “SUSP:” with the date in parentheses after the title. If additional information for the

suspense is necessary, include it in a separate paragraph—not in the SUBJECT line.

Examples:

SUBJECT: Official Memorandum Format Standards

SUBJECT: Letter of Appreciation (SSgt Angela Harkins)

SUBJECT: Self-Inspection Checklist Completion (SUSPENSE: 23 September 2014)

SUBJECT: The Format for a Subject Line That is Too Long for a Single Line Must Wrap and

be Aligned Under the First Word of the Subject in the Subject Line

“References”

Placement: There are two options for placement of the references element—within the subject

line or below the subject line. Cite a single reference to a communication or a directive in

parentheses immediately after the subject title. For two or more references, type “References:”

on the second line below the last line of the SUBJECT element. Capitalize the first letter of

every word except articles, prepositions and conjunctions.

Citation Format: In general, identify references within the DoD by organization, type of

communication, date and title. The organization and type of document within the DoD are

included in the document’s identification (e.g., an AFMAN is an Air Force Manual; a DoDD is a

DoD Directive) and need not be written out in the “References” section. For referencing

commercial publications, use the notes entry format from AU-1 Style and Author Guide or use

The Chicago Manual of Style (AU-1 is based on The Chicago Manual of Style). AU-1 is

available online from the Defense Technical Information Center (DTIC). In general, the notes

entries include the author’s name, publication title, publisher, date, and the paragraph or page

number.

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Examples:

SUBJECT: PACAF Work Center Standard (PACAF Memo, Same Subject, 6 June 2012)

SUBJECT: Preparation of Memorandums

References: (a) AFMAN 33-326, 25 November 2011, Preparing Official Communications.

(b) SAF/CIO A6 Memo, 12 October 2011, Air Force Guidance Memorandum to

AFI 33-360, Publications and Forms Management.

(d) William Strunk, Jr. and E. B. White, The Elements of Style (NY: MacMillan

Publishing Co, 1989), 70.

Additional Information for References: When completing the reference list, consider the

questions the recipients might have based on the memorandum you sent to them. For example, if

it can be assumed that the recipient is unfamiliar with the publication or form cited, write out the

title the first time you reference it. Also, you may want to attach a copy of the reference, or

instructions on how to obtain it, if the reader does not have it. Finally, if the reference was not

sent to all addressees previously, type not to all “(NOTAL)” after the citation for the referenced

item. The table below summarizes these tips and several other specifics for citing referenced

materials.

When you refer to: Show it in this format:

Unfamiliar references Write out the title the first time you reference

Familiar references Attached or instructions on how to obtain

References sent to some, but not to all [Reference citation] (NOTAL)

Other correspondence

AF/A1 Memo, 23 March 2012, Military Training

Program

A publication when the communication is

addressed within the Department of

Defense

AFI 33-360, Publications and Forms Management,

paragraphs 2.1 through 2.35

A publication when the communication is

addressed outside the Department of

Defense

Air Force Handbook 33-337, The Tongue and Quill

A Government form AF Form 74, Communications Status Notice/Request

A commercial publication

Strunk and White, The Elements of Style (NY:

MacMillan Publishing Co, 1989), 70

An item in a magazine, newspaper, or

book

“New Optimism About Aging,” The Washington

Post, 9 September 1993, p.1.

CHAPTER 14

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The Text of the Official Memorandum

Begin the text of the memorandum on the second line below the subject or references (if used).

1. Spacing paragraphs and subparagraphs. Single-space the text, but double-space

between paragraphs and subparagraphs (one blank line between all paragraphs and

subparagraphs). You may double-space the text of a one-paragraph memorandum less

than eight lines.

2. Numbering paragraphs. Number and letter each paragraph and subparagraph. A single

paragraph is not numbered. If your organization is a part of Headquarters Air Force (the

Air Staff and the Secretariat), follow the guidance in HQ Operating Instruction 33-3,

Correspondence Preparation, Control, and Tracking.

3. Formatting short subparagraphs. Use a run-in method of listing subparagraphs when

the subparagraphs consist of short sentences or phrases. The run-in method has several

advantages: (a) it’s compact, (b) it highlights ideas, and (c) it saves space.

4. First Line of Text. The first paragraph is never indented; it is numbered and flush left,

two line spaces below the last line of the SUBJECT element (or the References element,

if used). Indent the first line of sub-paragraphs to align the number or letter with the first

character of its parent level paragraph. Each sub-level is likewise indented to align its

paragraph number or letter with the first character of its parent level paragraph.

5. Subsequent lines of text. All second and subsequent lines of text for all paragraphs at

all levels begin flush with the left margin; do not indent.

6. Punctuation. Use conventional rules of English grammar for punctuation in the body.

7. Word Division. When dividing a word, separate between syllables.

8. Quotations. When quoting numbered paragraphs from another document, cite the source

and paragraph numbers in your text.

9. Suspense Dates. If you include a Suspense date in the text of the memorandum and not

in the Subject Element, emphasize it by placing it in a separate paragraph.

10. Contact information. Place contact names, e-mail addresses, fax numbers, and

telephone numbers in the last paragraph of the memorandum text.

11. Continuation Pages. Use plain bond paper. Begin typing the text of the continuation

page four lines below the page number. Type at least two lines of the text on each page.

Avoid dividing a paragraph of less than four lines between two pages.

12. Page numbering. The first page of a memorandum is never numbered. You may omit

page numbers on a one- or two-page memorandum; however, memorandums longer than

two pages must have page numbers. Number the succeeding pages starting with page 2.

Place page numbers 0.5-inch from the top of the page, flush with the right margin.

Number the continuation pages of each attachment as a separate sequence.

The Closing Section

The closing section of the document includes these elements: authority line, signature block,

signature, attachments, courtesy copy and distribution.

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Authority Line

Placement and Use: The authority line informs readers that the person who signed the

document acted for the commander, the command section, or the headquarters. If an authority

line is used, add “FOR THE COMMANDER” (or appropriate title) in uppercase on the second

line below the last line of the text and 4.5 inches from the left edge of the page or three spaces to

the right of the page center.

Use the authority line

when any of these are true:

Do not use the authority line

in any of these conditions:

1. A commander’s designated

representative signs for a specific

action.

2. A document represents the

commander’s position or the

coordinated position of the

headquarters staff.

3. Staff members sign documents that

direct action or announce policy

within their areas of responsibility.

1. The commander (or head of the organization)

signs.

2. The deputy or vice commander signs when the

commander is temporarily away from the place of

duty unless command action is directed by law

and requires an indication of delegation.

3. The correspondence expresses opinions of units,

directorates, divisions, offices, or branches.

4. The correspondence is addressed outside the DoD.

Signature Block

Placement: Start the signature block on the fifth line below the last line of text and 4.5 inches

from the left edge of the page or three spaces to the right of page center. If the authority line is

used, type the signature element five lines below the authority line. If dual signatures are

required, type the junior ranking official’s signature block at the left margin; type the senior

ranking official’s signature block 4.5 inches from the left edge of the page or three spaces to the

right of page center. Do not place the signature element on a continuation page by itself.

Consider correspondence received via e-mail, copied, or stamped //SIGNED// as authoritative as

long as the signed copy is kept on file at the originating office.

1. First Line. Type the name in uppercase the way the person signs it (normally as it

appears in the member’s official records). Include grade and service for military

members or grade and “DAF” (Department of the Air Force) for civilians. In general,

avoid using legal, educational, or ecclesiastical degrees or titles. As a rule, the rank for

colonels and general officers should not be abbreviated.

2. Second Line. Type the duty title as identified in the “FROM” element. “Acting” may be

added before the duty title of a staff position if the incumbent is absent or the position is

vacant. In addition, do not sign “for” or “in the absence of.” Do not use “Acting” for any

command capacity or where prohibited by law or statute (see AFI 33-321, Authentication

of Air Force Records; and AFI 51-604, Appointment to and Assumption of Command).

3. Third Line. Type the name of the office or organization level if it is not included on the

letterhead or the heading. Limit the signature element to three lines if possible; however,

if a line of the signature element is too long, indent the next line to begin under the third

character of the line above.

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Examples (First two lines of signature blocks):

Standard placement (4.5 inches from left edge): MARGARETTE S. LEWIS, Colonel, USAF

Commander

RAYMOND L. KENNEDY, MSgt, USAF

NCOIC Ground Safety

ELLEN C. CAMPANA, GS-15, DAF

Chief, Quality Assurance Branch

Standard placement with long duty title: JOSE V. MUNEZ, CMSgt, USAF

Chief, Computer Systems and Information

(Overflow duty title line is indented to align Technology Customer Service

under the third character of the line above)

Long name: MARTEL R. WESTHALLER III, Col, USAF, DC

(Signature block adjusted to the left) Base Dental Surgeon

(“Colonel” is usually spelled out. Also, this official may elect to use only initials for his first and

middle names with abbreviated rank; if so, the signature block fits in the standard location.)

Signature block with credentials: JANICE L. CROWE, Lt Col, USAF, MSC

Chief, Family Practice

Air National Guard SCOTT A. BROWN, Lt Col, USAF

(Title 10 status) Operations Officer

Air National Guard SCOTT A. BROWN, Lt Col, ANG

(Title 32 status) Operations Officer

Air Force Reserve ELLA M. NEAL, Lt Col, USAFR

(IAW command guidance on using “USAFR”) Commander

Air Force Reserve ELLA M. NEAL, Lt Col, USAF

(IAW command guidance on using “USAF”) Commander

Signature

Placement: Sign correspondence with permanent black ink. Use black typewriter ribbons,

black printer toner, or black ink for rubber stamps or signature facsimile equipment. See AFI 33-

321, Authentication of Air Force Records, for authentication of Air Force documents and how to

use seals instead of signatures.

Attachment or Attachments

Placement: Place “Attachment:” (for a single attachment) or “# Attachments:” (for two or more

attachments) at the left margin, on the third line below the signature element. When there are

two or more attachments, list each by number and in the order mentioned in the memorandum.

Beneath “Attachment” briefly describe each attachment, but do not use general terms or

abbreviations such as “as stated,” “as described above,” or “a/s.” Cite the office of origin, type

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of communication, date, and number of copies (in parentheses) if more than one. Include the

subject of the attachment if the receiver will not get copies of attachments or if the subject is not

already referenced in text. For classified attachments, show the assigned classification symbol in

parentheses. Send a copy of the memorandum when you send the attachment (first example,

below). If sending an attachment separately, type “(sep cover)” after the attachment label (see

example, below). Do not divide attachment listings between two pages. If the listing is too long,

type “Attachments: (listed on next page),” and list the attachments on a separate page.

Examples:

Attachment: [Memorandum with a single attachment]

ACC/CC Leave Policy Memo, 30 Jun 14

3 Attachments: [Memorandum with 2 or more attachments]

1. SAF CIO/A6 Memo, 30 Jun 12 (U)(2)

2. 380 FMS/CC Msg, 232300Z May 12 (NOTAL)

3. SAF/CIO Memo, 3 Aug 12 (S)

2 Attachments: [Memorandum with attachments under separate cover]

1. AFI XX-XXXX, 26 Sep 12

2. AFI XX-XXXX, 14 May 12 (sep cover)

12 Attachments (listed on next page) [Memorandum with attachments listed on next page]

Courtesy Copy Element (“cc:”)

Placement: When sending courtesy copies to activities other than to addressee, place “cc:” flush

with the left margin, on the second line below the attachment element. If the attachment

element is not used, place “cc:” on the third line below the signature element. List the

organization abbreviation and office symbol of the offices to receive copies. When the copy is

intended for a specific person in the office, include the person’s Rank and Name in parentheses

after the office symbol. If a courtesy copy is sent without including the attachments, type

“wo/Atch” after the office. For paper copies, circle, underline, or highlight the office to indicate

the recipient.

Examples:

cc: [Courtesy copies with attachment variations]

HQ AETC/A1 wo/Atch

HQ USAFE/A1 Atch 2 only

HQ PACAF/A1 (Atch under sep cover)

cc: [Courtesy copy to an office]

1 FW/CCP

cc: [Courtesy copy to a specific individual in an office]

12 FS/DO (Capt Thomas Moore)

If courtesy copies of a memorandum are not signed, write or stamp “signed” with black or dark

blue ink above the signature block. Also, do not show internal distribution of courtesy copies on

the original (or courtesy copy) for correspondence addressed outside your activity. However,

you may show the distribution if one addressee needs to know who received a courtesy copy, or

if correspondence is multiple-addressed and reproduced.

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Distribution Element

Placement: If “MEMORANDUM FOR DISTRIBUTION” is used, place “DISTRIBUTION:”

flush with the left margin, on the second line below the attachment element or the courtesy copy

element, if used. If neither the attachment element nor the courtesy copy elements are used,

place “DISTRIBUTION” on the third line below the signature element. Do not divide

distribution lists between two pages. If the list is too long, type “DISTRIBUTION (listed on

next page),” and list the organizations on a separate page.

Additional Information

The automated file designator element is optional and it is frequently beneficial to show if a

document is a record or coordination copy. If there are several documents in a package, they

should be arranged for action and clarity. See below for further details on these items.

Optional Automated File Designator (AFD) Element

The AFD element documents the storage location for data stored electronically. Type the AFD

two line spaces below the courtesy copy distribution element. You may include the AFD in the

identification line of talking, position, and bullet background papers. Contents of the AFD are

based on the user’s needs and the system being used. For example, the element may include the

file name, typist’s initials, and the uniform resource locator (URL) if stored on a website.

Typeset Correspondence

You may typeset correspondence for a large audience (such as a memorandum to ALMAJCOM-

FOA). Use an appropriate letterhead as with other official correspondence. You can use the full

range of typesetting capabilities, including, but not limited to, two columns, italics, bold type,

variable spacing, boxed inserts, and screened backgrounds.

Record or Coordination Copy

This is the official record for your office files, so make sure it is fully legible. Type or write

additional information of value only to the office of record on the record or coordination copy.

• Showing Coordination. Type or write the organization abbreviation and office symbol

of each office that should coordinate across the bottom or right side of the record copy.

The coordinating officials enter their last name and date.

• Showing Internal Courtesy Copy Distribution. List all internal courtesy distribution

on the record copy unless it is listed on the original.

• Identifying the Writer. If identifying the writer is of value to the office of record, place

the writer’s organization abbreviation and office symbol, name, telephone number,

typist’s initials, the date the correspondence is typed, and, if desired, the document

name/number at the top or bottom margin of the page. Do not repeat the writer’s name if

the writer signed the correspondence. Use a new identification line, if desired, each time

the correspondence is rewritten or retyped. Place the name of the person who rewrote it

on the next line followed by the date it was retyped.

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• Annotating for Magnetic Storage Media. Use the writer identification line to show

document name, storage location, or file identification for reference and possible revision

or reprinting.

• Preparing a Memorandum for Record (MR). When preparing a MR, whether it is for

another office or when using it as your primary record, write or type on the record copy

any information needed for the record. Continue on the back or a separate sheet if you

need more space. The writer then signs the MR. (“MR” is the technical abbreviation for

a memorandum for record; however, “MFR” is more widely recognized by Airmen.)

Attachments

Many times you will need to attach supporting documents to your correspondence and the order

of these documents has meaning for your correspondence. Placing supporting documents in the

right order conveys levels of significance and relationships between documents to convey the

context or background related to the issue in the correspondence. Understanding the context and

background can be key information for decision makers to understand the issue and make good

decisions.

Arranging and Marking Attachments

Attachment, appendix, annex, and exhibit all mean additional or supplementary material and

indicate relative position within a correspondence package. The first addition to the document is

an attachment; an addition to an attachment is an appendix; an addition to an appendix is an

annex; and additions to an annex are exhibits. Indicate on the attachment, appendix, annex, or

exhibit if there are appendices, annexes, or exhibits to it.

Type or write attachment markings in the same position as on the basic correspondence. Use

pencil to allow renumbering and reuse with other documents. Mark attachments as follows:

• Attachments are marked in the lower right corner as Atch 1, Atch 2, Atch 3, etc.

• Appendices to attachments are marked as Appendix A, Appendix B, Appendix C, etc.

• Annexes to appendices are marked as Annex 1, Annex 2, Annex 3, etc.

• Exhibits to annexes are marked as Exhibit A, Exhibit B, Exhibit C, etc.

• For multiple-page attachments, number the pages of each attachment in a separate

sequence. For example Atch 1 (1 of 3), Atch 1 (2 of 3), Atch 1 (3 of 3), etc.

• When sending more than one copy of an attachment, place the copy number (typed or

handwritten) to the right and slightly above the attachment number to indicate the copy is

the first, second, third, etc. For example Atch 1

, Atch 1

, etc.

CHAPTER 14

The Official Memorandum

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Arranging and Marking Attachments (Graphic)

Keep the Package Together

Staple a memorandum of more than one page, or with attachments, in the upper left corner

before dispatch. If possible, arrange pages so that the reader can read information without

removing the staples or paper clips; for example, turn landscape pages with top to the left. If

required, prepare envelopes or facsimile cover sheets, and place them at the left side behind the

copies for dispatch. Use a paper or binder clip to hold the packet together before dispatch.

Organizations may specify alternate methods to suit their needs.

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When using tabs, the first tab is located near the lower right corner and each successive tab is

located slightly higher. Keep the spacing between three or more tabs equal for a professional

look. The graphic for tab placement, below, depicts proper tab placement.

Tab Placement (Graphic)

CHAPTER 14

The Official Memorandum

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The Official Memorandum: Examples

The official memorandum is a powerful tool that can be used in many ways to accomplish many

tasks. The official memorandum informs single and multiple receivers; personnel within and

between organizations; leaders up and down the chain of command; and documents actions. The

following official memorandums examples are based on many of the typical situations where

Airmen need to make an official, written record of an event, decision or action.

• Format: The format guidance for an official memorandum written as an official

memorandum with visual cues for placement and spacing of the elements described in

this chapter shown in grey.

• Subdividing Paragraphs: The rules for subdividing paragraphs in the official

memorandum are presented in an official memorandum.

• Indorsement: When the official memorandum must be signed to acknowledge receipt

or action, the indorsement format should be used. The indorsement format has many

uses, such as staff coordination, requests for training or disciplinary actions.

• Letter of Reprimand: The letter of reprimand (LOR) is a specialized indorsement

memorandum. Refer to The Military Commander and the Law and your local legal office

for more guidance on disciplinary letters.

• IN TURN: When the official memorandum needs a record of review without the

formality of the indorsement format, the IN TURN format provides reviewer tracking.

• After-Action Report: When an action has been completed, the official memorandum

can inform others about the results of the action, operation or mission.

• Trip Report: The trip report is another form of an after-action report that is commonly

used in the Air Force. The trip report concisely conveys information about the trip’s

purpose, travelers, and itinerary after the trip is concluded. A more detailed discussion of

relevant information from the trip is presented followed by any recommendations and/or

conclusions. In short, the trip report should answer the who, what, when, where, why and

how questions in a concise, orderly format. The trip report should convey everything the

addressees need to know about the trip, especially as it relates to the unit’s mission and

any recommendations or costs.

• Short Note Reply: Reply to an official memorandum by adding your short note reply

directly to the original memorandum. The short note reply is less formal than other

response formats but is entirely appropriate when used correctly.

• Memorandum for Record (MFR or MR): The MFR is less formal than the official

memorandum but records important information, questions or actions quickly. There are

several formats for the MFR depending on the time and space available.

The Tongue and Quill recommends users follow the guidance of this chapter when preparing any

official memorandum. This guidance includes checking for command supplements or

commander preferences in preparing official memorandums. The examples that follow are just a

few of the possible uses for the official memorandum. The goal is to standardize the format so

Airmen can focus on the substance to communicate clearly and inform others.

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Format of the Official Memorandum

CHAPTER 14

The Official Memorandum

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Format for Subdividing Paragraphs in Official Memorandums

CHAPTER 14

The Official Memorandum

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The Indorsement Format

CHAPTER 14

The Official Memorandum

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The “IN TURN” Format

CHAPTER 14

The Official Memorandum

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The After-Action Report

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The Trip Report

CHAPTER 14

The Official Memorandum

- 187 -

The Short Note Reply

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The Memorandum for Record

CHAPTER 14

The Official Memorandum

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The Memorandum for Record: Separate Page Attachment

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Spelling Checkers: Before You Sign

Before you—or your boss—signs an official memorandum (or a personal letter)—run your spell

checking software and READ the document again. The extreme examples below may never

happen to you; however, there are some very embarrassing spelling checker suggestions for

some military terms not recognized by the software.

READ the document; avoid embarrassment.

Spell Chequer

Eye halve a spelling chequer

It came with my pea sea

It plainly marques four my revue

Miss Steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word

And weight four it two say

Weather eye am wrong oar write

It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid

It nose bee fore two long

And eye can put the error rite

Its rarely ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it

I am shore your pleased two no.

Its letter perfect in it's weigh

My chequer tolled me sew.

–Sauce Unknown

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 191 -

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

This chapter covers:

• The Heading Section

• The Text of the Personal Letter

• The Closing Section

• Forms of Address, Salutation and Complimentary Close

• Military Ranks and Abbreviations

• The Personal Letter: Examples

Use a personalized letter when your communication needs a personal touch or when warmth or

sincerity is essential. You may use it to write to an individual on a private matter for praise,

condolence, sponsorship, etc. Keep it brief, preferably no longer than one page, and avoid using

acronyms. For envelopes, always use United States Postal Service (USPS) abbreviations for

addresses. For further information, see USPS Publication 28, Postal Addressing Standards.

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The Heading Section

The heading section of the personal letter includes these elements: date, return address, address

of the individual being sent the letter and the salutation elements.

Date

Placement and Format: Place the date 1 inch from the right edge, 1.75 inches from the top

of the page. Use the “Day Month Year” or “DD Mmm YY” format for letters addressed to a

military/government organization. In the “DD Mmm YY” format, the month and year are both

abbreviated for consistency. For civilian addressees, use the “Month Day, Year” format.

Finally, unless the date of signature has legal significance, date the original and all copies of the

correspondence at the time of dispatch.

Examples:

Military Addressees–Day Month Year 15 October 2014

Military Addressees–DD Mmm YY 15 Oct 14

Civilian Addressees–Month Day, Year October 15, 2014

Return Address

Place the sender’s return address flush with the left margin on the second line below the date.

Include the sender’s rank, full name, duty title, organization and complete mailing address using

single spacing between lines.. Use a period after abbreviations such as “Mr.,” “Ms.,” “Mrs.” and

“Dr.” Do not use punctuation in the last line of the address except for the dash in the ZIP+4

code. The standard format for spacing between the state abbreviation and the ZIP code is two

spaces. For examples, refer to the “Forms of Address, Salutation and Complimentary Close”

section of this chapter.

Example:

Chief Master Sergeant David L. Jones

Duty Title

Organization

Street Address

City ST 12345-6789

Receiver’s Address

Place the address of the individual the letter is being sent to on the third line below the return

address. Include the receiver’s title or rank, full name and complete mailing address using single

spacing between lines. Use a period after abbreviations such as “Mr.,” “Ms.,” “Mrs.” and “Dr.”

Do not use punctuation in the last line of the address except for the dash in the ZIP+4 code. The

standard format for spacing between the state abbreviation and the ZIP code is two spaces. For

examples, refer to the “Forms of Address, Salutation and Complimentary Close” section of this

chapter.

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

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Example:

Lieutenant Colonel Getty A. Letter

Duty Title

Organization

Street Address

City ST 12345-6789

Salutation

Place the salutation on the second line below the receiver’s address. The salutation begins with

“Dear” followed by the title (or rank) and last name of the receiver. Do not use punctuation in

the salutation. For examples, refer to the “Forms of Address, Salutation and Complimentary

Close” section of this chapter.

The Text of the Personal Letter

Start the text of a letter on the second line below the salutation. Do not number the paragraphs.

Indent the first line of text for all major paragraphs 0.5 inches; if there are sub-paragraphs, follow

the same guidance for sub-paragraph numbering and indentation as in the official memorandum.

All second and subsequent lines of text for all paragraphs are flush with the left margin. You

may double-space text of a one-paragraph letter with less than eight lines. Include any relevant

references in the first paragraph rather than using a references element.

The Closing Section

Complimentary Close.

Place “Sincerely” on the second line below the text and 4.5 inches from the left edge of the page

or three spaces to the right of page center. Do not punctuate the complimentary close.

Authority Line Element: The authority line is not used for Personal Letters.

Signature Element.

Place the signature element on the fifth line below and aligned with the complimentary close

(4.5 inches from the left edge of the page). Use the sender’s full signature block.

Attachment Element.

Place “Attachment:” (single attachment) or “# Attachments:” (two or more attachments) flush

with the left margin, on the third line below the signature element.

Courtesy Copy Element (“cc:”)

Placement: For courtesy copies to activities other than the addressee, place “cc:” flush with the

left margin, on the second line below the attachment element. If the attachment element is not

used, place “cc:” on the third line below the signature element. List the names or unit

designators of the recipients. If a courtesy copy is sent without including the attachments, type

“wo/Atch” after the office. Circle, underline or highlight the office to indicate the recipient.

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Forms of Address, Salutation and Complimentary Close

The DoD Manual for Written Material provides “Forms of Address, Salutation, and

Complimentary Close” tables as references for composing the address, salutation and

complimentary closing elements of a personal letter. The tables provide examples for every

branch of government, as well as many departments, agencies or groups of people from the

White House to private citizens. These tables have long been staples of The Tongue and Quill

and continue to be an important reference for all Airmen: using the proper address, salutation

and complimentary close for correspondence makes a good first impression.

For this edition of The Tongue and Quill, The “Forms of Address, Salutation, and

Complimentary Close” tables from the DoD manual were extracted, combined into a single

table, and edited to conform to Air Force standards: the Air Force uses the open punctuation

style and spells out the ranks of all military members in the addresses on personal letters (for the

address on the envelope, refer to the Envelope section of this publication). Also, the standard to

abbreviate “U.S.” and “U.N.” is to write them without the periods (i.e. “US” and “UN”). The

tips below and the entries in the table are the standards useful to most Airmen in their daily

work; however, always check to see if your command has additional or supplementary guidance.

• Name or Gender Unknown: Use professional or organizational title when the name or

the gender of the receiver (or both) are not known (e.g., Dear Resource Manager).

• Responding to Jointly Written Letters: Respond to letters written jointly by more than

three people by preparing single replies, or reply to the person signing the original letter

and mentioning the others early in the letter.

• Titles: In the salutation for letters addressed to persons in formal positions such as

“President,” “Vice President,” “Chairman,” “Secretary,” “Ambassador” or “Minister”

that may be held by men or women, use the title “Mr.” or “Madam.” For example, use

“Dear Mr. President” or “Dear Madam Secretary” if using the formal position in the

salutation.

o The title “Ms.,” “Miss” or “Mrs.” is used when the last name rather than a formal

title follows. (e.g., Ms. Smith, Miss Rice, Mrs. Gartner)

o “Ms.” may be used when an incumbent or correspondent has indicated this

preference or when a woman’s marital status is unknown.

o Spell out titles (except Dr., Mr. and Mrs.) but do not duplicate titles

(Dr. Charles Norris or Charles Norris, MD; not Dr. Charles Norris, MD).

• Punctuation: The Air Force uses open punctuation in the salutation and complimentary

close (no punctuation after the salutation or close). A period is used after “Mr.,” “Mrs.”

or “Dr.” and similar titles and a dash is used in the ZIP+4 code (e.g., 12345-6789).

• Spacing: Single space between lines.

• Readability: Readability of the addresses is essential. Use single spacing between lines.

On the envelope, do not include punctuation except for the dash in the ZIP+4 to facilitate

the optical character recognition (OCR) processing of correspondence.

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

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Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

The White House

The President

The President (Full Name)

The White House

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW

Washington DC 20500

Dear Mr./Madam President

Respectfully yours

Spouse of the President

Mr./Mrs. (full name)

The White House

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW

Washington DC 20500

Dear Mr./Mrs. (last name)

Sincerely

Assistant or Special Assistant to

the President

The Honorable (full name)

Assistant (Special Assistant) to the President

for (title)

The White House

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW

Washington DC 20500

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

The Vice President

276 Eisenhower Executive Office Building

Washington DC 20501

Dear Mr./Madam Vice President

Sincerely

The Vice President

As President of the Senate

The Honorable (full name)

President of the Senate

United States Senate

S-212 Capitol Building

Washington DC 20510

Dear Mr. President

Sincerely

Director, Office of Management

and Budget

The Honorable (full name)

Director, Office of Management and Budget

Washington DC 20503

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

The Federal Judiciary

The Chief Justice

The Supreme Court

Washington DC 20543

Dear Chief Justice

Sincerely

Associate Justice

The Honorable (full name)

The Supreme Court

Washington DC 20543

Dear Justice (last name)

Sincerely

Retired Justice

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Justice (last name)

Sincerely

Judge of a Federal, State,

or Local Court

The Honorable (full name)

Judge of the (name of court)

(address)

Dear Judge (last name)

Sincerely

Clerk of a Court

Mr. (full name)

Clerk of the (name of court)

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

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Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

The Congress

Use “+4” codes if available. For Congressional Member individual ZIP+4 Codes, see the Congressional Staff Directory.

Also see US Senate and US House websites at http://www.senate.gov and http://www.house.gov.

President pro tempore of the

Senate

The Honorable (full name)

President pro tempore

United States Senate

Washington DC 20510-(+4 Code)

Dear Senator (last name)

Sincerely

Majority Leader,

Senate

The Honorable (full name)

Majority Leader

United States Senate

Washington DC 20510-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Majority Leader

Sincerely

Committee Chairman,

Senate

The Honorable (full name)

Chairman

Committee on (name of committee)

United States Senate

Washington DC 20510-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Chairman

Sincerely

Committee Ranking Member,

Senate

The Honorable (full name)

Ranking Member

Committee on (name of committee)

United States Senate

Washington DC 20510-(+4 Code)

Dear Senator (last name)

Sincerely

Subcommittee Chairman,

Senate

The Honorable (full name)

Chairman

Subcommittee on (name of committee)

Committee on (name of full committee)

United States Senate

Washington DC 20510-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Chairman

Sincerely

Senator

(Washington office)

The Honorable (full name)

United States Senate

Washington DC 20510-(+4 Code)

Dear Senator (last name)

Sincerely

Senator

(home state office)

The Honorable (full name)

United States Senator

(address)

Dear Senator (last name)

Sincerely

Senator-elect

Senator-elect (full name)

---or if applicable*---

The Honorable (full name)

Senator-elect

(address)

Dear Senator-elect (last name)

Sincerely

*A Senator-elect may be referred to as “The Honorable” if applicable to the individual’s prior or current position.

Office of a deceased

senator

Office of Senator (full name)

United States Senate

Washington DC 20510-(+4 Code)

Sirs or Dear Mr./Ms. (name of

contact)

Sincerely

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 197 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Speaker of the House of

Representatives

The Honorable (full name)

Speaker of the House

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Speaker

Sincerely

Majority Leader, House

The Honorable (full name)

Majority Leader

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Majority Leader

Sincerely

Committee Chairman,

House of Representatives

The Honorable (full name)

Chairman

Committee on (name of committee)

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Chairman

Sincerely

Committee Ranking Member,

House of Representatives

The Honorable (full name)

Ranking Member

Committee on (name of committee)

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Representative (last name)

Sincerely

Subcommittee Chairman,

House of Representatives

The Honorable (full name)

Chairman

Subcommittee on (name of committee)

Committee on (name of full committee)

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Chairman

Sincerely

Representative

(Washington office)

The Honorable (full name)

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Representative (last name)

Sincerely

Representative

(home state office)

The Honorable (full name)

US Representative

(address)

Dear Representative (last name)

Sincerely

Representative- elect

Representative-elect (full name)

---or if applicable*---

The Honorable (full name)

Representative-elect

(address)

Dear Representative-elect (last

name)

Sincerely

*A Representative-elect may be referred to as “The Honorable” if applicable to the individual’s prior or current position.

Office of a deceased

representative

Office of the late Honorable (full name)

---or---

Office of the (number of) District of (State)

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (name of contact)

Sincerely

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Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Resident Commissioner

The Honorable (full name)

Resident Commissioner from Puerto Rico

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Delegate

The Honorable (full name)

Delegate from (location)

US House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-(+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Legislative Agencies

Comptroller General

The Honorable (full name)

Comptroller General of the United States

Washington DC 20548

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Public Printer

The Honorable (full name)

Public Printer

US Government Printing Office

Washington DC 20401

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Librarian of Congress

The Honorable (full name)

Librarian of Congress

Washington DC 20540

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

The Executive Departments

For Executive Department Zip+4 Codes, see the Federal Yellow Book.

The titles for Cabinet Secretaries are Secretary of Agriculture, Secretary of Commerce, Secretary of Defense, Secretary of

Education, Secretary of Energy, Secretary of Health and Human Services, Secretary of Homeland Security, Secretary of

Housing and Urban Development, Secretary of the Interior, Attorney General (Department of Justice), Secretary of Labor,

Secretary of State, Secretary of Transportation, Secretary of the Treasury, and Secretary of Veteran Affairs.

Members of the Cabinet addressed

as Secretary

The Honorable (full name)

Secretary of (Department)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Secretary

Sincerely

Attorney General

The Honorable (full name)

Attorney General

Washington DC 20530

Dear Mr./Madam Attorney General

Sincerely

Deputy Secretary of a Department

The Honorable (full name)

Deputy Secretary of (Department)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Under Secretary of a Department

The Honorable (full name)

Under Secretary of (Department)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Assistant Secretary of a

Department

The Honorable (full name)

Assistant Secretary of (Department)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

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Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Deputy Under Secretary

of a Department who is Senate-

confirmed

The Honorable (full name)

Deputy Under Secretary of (Department)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

The Military Departments

The Secretaries of the Military

Departments

The Honorable (full name)

Secretary of (Department)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Secretary

Sincerely

Under Secretary of the Military

Department

The Honorable (full name)

Under Secretary of (Department)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Army, Air Force, and Marine Corps Officers

General,

Lieutenant General,

Major General,

Brigadier General

(full rank) (full name), (Service abbreviation)

(address)

Dear General (last name)

Sincerely

Colonel,

Lieutenant Colonel

(same as above)

Dear Colonel (last name)

Sincerely

Major (same as above)

Dear Major (last name)

Sincerely

Captain (same as above)

Dear Captain (last name)

Sincerely

First Lieutenant,

Second Lieutenant

(same as above)

Dear Lieutenant (last name)

Sincerely

Chief Warrant Officer (same as above)

Dear Mr./Miss/ Ms./Mrs. (last name)

Sincerely

Navy Officers

Admiral;

Vice Admiral;

Rear Admiral;

Rear Admiral (lower half)

(full rank) (full name), (Service abbreviation)

(address)

Dear Admiral (last name)

Sincerely

Captain (same as above)

Dear Captain (last name)

Sincerely

Commander,

Lieutenant Commander

(same as above)

Dear Commander (last name)

Sincerely

Lieutenant,

Lieutenant (Junior Grade)

(same as above)

Dear Lieutenant (last name)

Sincerely

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Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Ensign (same as above)

Dear Ensign (last name)

Sincerely

Chief Warrant Officer (Number) (same as above)

Dear Chief Warrant Officer (last

name)

Sincerely

Warrant Officer (same as above)

Dear Warrant Officer (last name)

Sincerely

Army Enlisted Personnel

Sergeant Major of the Army

Sergeant Major of the Army (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Sergeant Major (last name)

Sincerely

Command Sergeant Major

Command Sergeant Major (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Sergeant Major (last name)

Sincerely

Sergeant Major

Sergeant Major (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Sergeant Major (last name)

Sincerely

First Sergeant

First Sergeant (full name), USA

(address)

Dear First Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Master Sergeant

Master Sergeant (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Sergeant First Class

Sergeant First Class (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Staff Sergeant

Staff Sergeant (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Sergeant

Sergeant (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Corporal

Corporal (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Corporal (last name)

Sincerely

Specialists (all grades)

Specialist (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Specialist (last name)

Sincerely

Private First Class

Private First Class (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Private (last name)

Sincerely

Private

Private (full name), USA

(address)

Dear Private (last name)

Sincerely

Navy Enlisted Personnel

Master Chief Petty Officer of the

Navy

Master Chief Petty Officer of the Navy (full

name), USN

(address)

Dear Master Chief (last name)

Sincerely

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 201 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Master Chief Petty Officer

Master Chief Petty Officer (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Master Chief (last name)

Sincerely

Senior Chief Petty Officer

Senior Chief Petty Officer (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Senior Chief (last name)

Sincerely

Chief Petty Officer

Chief Petty Officer (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Chief (last name)

Sincerely

Petty Officer First Class

Petty Officer First Class (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Petty Officer (last name)

Sincerely

Petty Officer Second Class

Petty Officer Second Class (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Petty Officer (last name)

Sincerely

Petty Officer Third Class

Petty Officer Third Class (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Petty Officer (last name)

Sincerely

Airman (includes Apprentice and

Recruit)

Airman (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Airman (last name)

Sincerely

Constructionman (includes

Apprentice and Recruit)

Constructionman (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Constructionman (last name)

Sincerely

Dentalman (includes Apprentice

and Recruit)

Dentalman (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Dentalman (last name)

Sincerely

Fireman (includes Apprentice and

Recruit)

Fireman (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Fireman (last name)

Sincerely

Hospital Corpsman (includes

Apprentice and Recruit)

Hospital Corpsman (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Hospital Corpsman (last name)

Sincerely

Seaman (includes Apprentice and

Recruit)

Seaman (full name), USN

(address)

Dear Seaman (last name)

Sincerely

Marine Corps Enlisted Personnel

Sergeant Major of the Marine

Corps

Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps (full

name), USMC

(address)

Dear Sergeant Major (last name)

Sincerely

Sergeant Major

Sergeant Major (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Sergeant Major (last name)

Sincerely

Master Gunnery Sergeant

Master Gunnery Sergeant (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Master Gunnery Sergeant (last

name)

Sincerely

First Sergeant

First Sergeant (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear First Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Master Sergeant

Master Sergeant (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Master Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 33-337, 27 MAY 2015

- 202 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Gunnery Sergeant

Gunnery Sergeant (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Gunnery Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Staff Sergeant

Staff Sergeant (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Staff Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Sergeant

Sergeant (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Corporal

Corporal (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Corporal (last name)

Sincerely

Lance Corporal

Lance Corporal (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Corporal (last name)

Sincerely

Private First Class

Private First Class (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Private First Class (last name)

Sincerely

Private

Private (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Private (last name)

Sincerely

Air Force Enlisted Personnel

Chief Master Sergeant of the Air

Force

Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force (full

name), USAF

(address)

Dear Chief (last name)

Sincerely

Chief Master Sergeant

Chief Master Sergeant (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Chief (last name)

Sincerely

Senior Master Sergeant

Senior Master Sergeant (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Master Sergeant

Master Sergeant (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Technical Sergeant

Technical Sergeant (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Staff Sergeant

Staff Sergeant (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Sergeant (last name)

Sincerely

Senior Airman

Senior Airman (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Airman (last name)

Sincerely

Airman First Class

Airman First Class (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Airman (last name)

Sincerely

Airman

Airman (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Airman (last name)

Sincerely

Airman Basic

Airman Basic (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Airman (last name)

Sincerely

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 203 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Other Military Personnel

All retired military personnel

(rank) (full name), (Service abbreviation) (Ret)

(address)

Dear (rank) (last name)

Sincerely

Cadet

Cadet (full name)

(address)

Dear Cadet (last name)

Sincerely

Midshipman

Midshipman (full name)

(address)

Dear Midshipman (last name)

Sincerely

Air Cadet

Air Cadet (full name)

(address)

Dear Air Cadet (last name)

Sincerely

Independent Agencies

A Military head of a Federal agency, authority, or board shall be addressed by military rank.

Head of a Federal Agency,

Authority, or Board

The Honorable (full name)

(title)

(agency)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

President of a Commission or

Board

The Honorable (full name)

President, (name of commission)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Chairman of a Commission or

Board

The Honorable (full name)

Chairman, (name of commission)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Chairman

Sincerely

Postmaster General

The Honorable (full name)

Postmaster General

475 L’Enfant Plaza West SW

Washington DC 20260

Dear Mr./Madam Postmaster

General

Sincerely

American Missions

American Ambassador

The Honorable (full name)

American Ambassador

(city), (country)

(address)

Dear Mr./Madam Ambassador

Sincerely

American Ambassador

(with military rank)

(Full rank) (full name)

American Ambassador

(city), (country)

(address)

Dear (rank) (last name)

Sincerely

Personal/Special Representative

of the President

The Honorable (full name)

Personal Representative of the President of the

United States of America to (country)

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 33-337, 27 MAY 2015

- 204 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

American Foreign Service Officer

with personal rank of Minister

The Honorable (full name)

(rank: Minister Counselor or Counselor)

American Embassy

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

American Minister

(with military rank)

(full rank) (full name)

(title)

American Embassy

(address)

Dear (rank) (last name)

Sincerely

American Consul General, Consul,

or Vice Consul

Mr./Ms. (full name)

American Consul General (or Consul or Vice

Consul)

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

US Political Advisor

The Honorable (full name)

United States Political Advisor for (country)

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Foreign Diplomatic Missions to the United States

Foreign Ambassador in the United

States

His/Her Excellency (full name)

Ambassador of (country)

Washington DC (ZIP+4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Ambassador

Sincerely

Foreign Minister in the United

States

(head of a delegation)

The Honorable (full name)

Minister of (country)

Washington DC (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Minister

Sincerely

Foreign Minister Counselor in the

United States

The Honorable (full name)

Minister Counselor

Embassy of (country)

Washington DC (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Minister

Sincerely

Foreign Chargé d’Affaires in the

United States

Mr./Madam (full name)

Chargé d’Affaires of (country)

(address)

Dear Mr./Madam Chargé d’Affaires

Sincerely

International Organizations

Organization with no US

Representative*

The (title of officer) of the (organization name)

(address)

Dear Sir/Madam

Sincerely

*Address communications to the ranking officer of an international organization that has no full-time US representative.

Secretary General of the

Organization of American States

The Honorable (full name)*

Secretary General of the Organization of

American States

Washington DC 20006

Dear Mr./Madam Secretary General

Sincerely

*Address officials as “The Honorable” unless otherwise entitled to “His [or] Her Excellency.”

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 205 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Assistant Secretary General of the

Organization of American States

The Honorable (full name)

Assistant Secretary General of the

Organization of American States

Washington DC 20006

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

United States Representative on

the Council of the Organization of

American States

The Honorable (full name),

US Representative on the Council of the

Organization of American States

Washington DC 20520

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

United Nations

Address communications for the United Nations to the US Representative to the United Nations, through the Department

of State. Direct communication with the United Nations is inappropriate. Send all notes for the United Nations through

the US Representative with a cover note with appropriate instruction. Address officials as “The Honorable” unless

otherwise entitled to “His [or] Her Excellency.”

Secretary General of the United

Nations

The Honorable (full name)

Secretary General of the United Nations

New York NY 10017

Dear Mr./Madam Secretary General

Sincerely

US Representative to the United

Nations

The Honorable (full name)

United States Representative to the United

Nations

New York NY 10017

Dear Mr./Ms. Ambassador (last

name)

Sincerely

Chairman, US Delegation to the

UN Military Staff Committee

The Honorable (full name)

Chairman, United States Delegation United

Nations Military Staff Committee

United States Mission to the United Nations

New York NY 10017

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

US Senior Representative to the

UN General Assembly

The Honorable (full name)

Senior Representative of the United States to

the General Assembly of the United Nations

New York NY 10017

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Senior Military Adviser to the

US Delegation to the UN General

Assembly

(Full rank) (full name)

Senior Military Adviser to the

United States Delegation to the

United Nations General Assembly

New York NY 10017

Dear (rank) (last name)

Sincerely

US Representative on the UN

Economic and Social Council

The Honorable (full name)

United States Representative to the

Economic and Social Council of the

United Nations

New York NY 10017

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 33-337, 27 MAY 2015

- 206 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

US Representative on the UN

Disarmament Commission

The Honorable (full name)

United States Representative on the

Disarmament Commission of the

United Nations

New York NY 10017

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

US Representative to the UN

Trusteeship Council

The Honorable (full name)

United States Representative on the

Trusteeship Council of the United Nations

New York NY 10017

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

State and Local Government

State Governor

The Honorable (full name)

Governor of (State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Governor (last name)

Sincerely

Acting State Governor

The Honorable (full name)

Acting Governor of (State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

State Lieutenant Governor

The Honorable (full name)

Lieutenant Governor of (State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

State Secretary of State

The Honorable (full name)

Secretary of State of (State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam (last name)

Sincerely

Chief Justice of a State Supreme

Court

The Honorable (full name)

Chief Justice Supreme Court of the State of

(State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Chief Justice

Sincerely

State Attorney General

The Honorable (full name)

Attorney General State of (State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Madam Attorney General

Sincerely

State Treasurer, Comptroller, or

Auditor

The Honorable (full name)

State (Treasurer, Comptroller, or Auditor)

State of (State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

President, State Senate

The Honorable (full name)

President of the Senate of the State of (State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

State Senator

The Honorable (full name)

(State) Senate

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 207 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Speaker, State House of

Representatives, Assembly or

House of Delegates*

The Honorable (full name)

Speaker of the (Legislature’s name*) of the

State of (State)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

State Representative,

Assemblyman, or Delegate*

The Honorable (full name)

(State) (Legislature’s name*)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

*In most States, the lower branch of the legislature is the House of Representatives. In some States, such as California

and New York, the lower house is known as the Assembly. In others, such as Maryland, Virginia, and West Virginia, it is

known as the House of Delegates. Nebraska has a one-house legislature; its members are classed as senators.

Mayor

The Honorable (full name)

Mayor of (city)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mayor (last name)

Sincerely

President of a Board of

Commissioners

The Honorable (full name)

President, Board of Commissioners of (city)

City ST (ZIP +4 Code)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Ecclesiastical Organizations

Catholic Cardinal

His Eminence (first name) Cardinal (last name)

(address)

Dear Cardinal (last name)

Sincerely

Catholic Archbishop

The Most Reverend (full name)

Archbishop of (archdiocese)

(address)

Dear Archbishop (last name)

Sincerely

Catholic Bishop

The Most Reverend (full name)

Bishop of (place)

(address)

Dear Bishop (last name)

Sincerely

Catholic Monsignor

The Reverend Monsignor (full name)

(address)

Dear Monsignor (last name)

Sincerely

Catholic Priest

The Reverend (full name), (initials of order)

(address)

Dear Father (last name) (informal)

Sincerely

Catholic Mother Superior of an

Institution

Reverend Mother (full name), (initials of order)

(name of institution)

(address)

Dear Reverend Mother

Sincerely

Catholic Sister

Sister (full name), (initials of order)

(name of organization)

(address)

Dear Sister (first name)

Sincerely

Catholic Brother

Brother (full name), (initials of order)

(organization)

(address)

Dear Brother (first name)

Sincerely

Episcopal Archdeacon

The Venerable (full name)

Archdeacon of (place)

(address)

Dear Archdeacon (last name)

Sincerely

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 33-337, 27 MAY 2015

- 208 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Episcopal Dean

The Very Reverend (full name), (initials of

degree)

Dean of (place)

(address)

Dear Dean (last name)

Sincerely

Methodist Bishop

The Reverend (full name)

Bishop of (place)

(address)

Dear Bishop (last name)

Sincerely

Mormon Bishop

Mr. (full name)

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day

Saints

(address)

Dear Mr. (last name)

Sincerely

Army Chaplain

Chaplain (rank in parenthesis) (full name),

USA

(address)

Dear Chaplain (last name)

Sincerely

Navy Chaplain

Rank (full name) CHC, USN

(address)

Dear Chaplain (last name)

Sincerely

Air Force Chaplain

Chaplain (rank) (full name), USAF

(address)

Dear Chaplain (last name)

Sincerely

Marine Corps Chaplain

Chaplain (rank) (full name), USMC

(address)

Dear Chaplain (last name)

Sincerely

Minister, Pastor, or Rector

(with doctoral degree)

The Reverend Dr. (full name)

(address)

Dear Dr. (last name)

Sincerely

Minster, Pastor, or Rector

(without doctoral degree)

The Reverend (full name)

(address)

Dear Reverend (last name)

Sincerely

Rabbi

(with doctoral degree)

Rabbi (full name), (initials of degree)

(address)

Dear Dr. (last name)

Sincerely

Rabbi

(without doctoral degree)

Rabbi (full name)

(address)

Dear Rabbi (last name)

Sincerely

Private Citizens

University or college president

(with doctoral degree)

Dr. (full name)

President, (name of institution)

(address)

Dear Dr. (last name)

Sincerely

University or college president

(without a doctoral degree)

Mr. (full name)

President, (name of institution)

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Dean of a school

(with doctoral degree)

Dr. (full name)

Dean, School of (name)

(name of institution)

(address)

Dear Dr. (last name)

Sincerely

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 209 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Dean of a school

(without doctoral degree)

Dean (full name), School of (name)

(name of institution)

(address)

Dear Dean (last name)

Sincerely

Professor*

(with doctoral degree)

Dr. (or Professor) (full name)

Department of (name)

(name of institution)

(address)

Dear Dr. (last name)

Sincerely

Professor*

(without doctoral degree)

Professor (full name)

Department of (name)

(name of institution)

(address)

Dear Professor (last name)

Sincerely

Associate Professor* or

Assistant Professor*

(with doctoral degree)

Dr. (or Professor) (full name)

Associate (or Assistant) Professor

Department of (name)

(name of institution)

(address)

Dear Professor (last name)

Sincerely

Associate Professor* or

Assistant Professor*

(without doctoral degree)

Mr./Ms. (full name)

Associate (or Assistant) Professor

Department of (name)

(name of institution)

(address)

Dear Professor (last name)

Sincerely

*Professor, Associate Professor, and Assistant Professor are academic ranks that may be held with or without a doctoral

degree, depending on the position and university policies. “Dr.” denotes the award of a doctoral degree and is usually the

preferred title by those holding a doctoral degree.

Physician

(Full name), MD

(address)

Dear Dr. (last name)

Sincerely

Lawyer

Mr./Ms. (full name)

Attorney at Law

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

One individual

Mr. (full name)

Mrs. (full name)

Miss (full name)

Ms. (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr. (last name)

Dear Mrs. (last name)

Dear Miss (last name)

Dear Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Two individuals:

Married, no special title

Mr. and Mrs. (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr. and Mrs. (last name)

Sincerely

Two individuals (men):

No relationship specified

Mr. (full name) and

Mr. (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr. (last name) and Mr. (last

name)

Sincerely

Two individuals (women)

No relationship specified

Mrs. (full name) and

Miss (full name)

(address)

Dear Mrs. (last name) and Miss (last

name)

Sincerely

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 33-337, 27 MAY 2015

- 210 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Two individuals: Marital status

and relationship not specified

Ms. (full name) and

Mr. (full name)

(address)

Dear Ms. (last name) and Mr. (last

name)

Sincerely

Two individuals (women):

Marital status and relationship not

specified

Ms. (full name) and

Ms. (full name)

(address)

Dear Ms. (last name) and Ms. (last

name)

Sincerely

Three or more individuals: Men

Messieurs (full name) and

(full name) and (full name)

(address)

Gentlemen

---or---

Sirs

---or---

Dear Messieurs (last name) and

(last name) and (last name)

Sincerely

Three or more individuals:

Married Women

Mesdames (full name) and

(full name) and (full name)

(address)

Dear Mesdames (last name) and

(last name) and (last name)

Sincerely

Three or more individuals:

Unmarried Women

Misses (full name) and (full name)

and (full name)

---or---

The Misses (last name), (last name),

and (last name)

(address)

Dear Misses (last name) and

(last name) and (last name)

Sincerely

Three or more individuals:

Same last name

Messieurs (given names), Mesdames (given

names), and Misses (given names) (last name)

(address)

Dear Messieurs, Mesdames, and

Misses (last name)

Sincerely

Married couple, same last name:

husband has special title

Dr. and Mrs. (husband’s full name)

(address)

Dear Dr. and Mrs. (husband’s last

name)

Sincerely

Married couple, same last name:

wife has special title

Senator (wife’s full name)

Mr. (husband’s full name)

(address)

Dear Senator and Mr. (last name)

Sincerely

Married couple, same last name:

both have special titles

Captain (husband’s full name)

Professor (wife’s full name)

(address)

Dear Captain and Professor (last

name)

Sincerely

Married couple, different last

names

Ms. (wife’s full name)

Mr. (husband’s full name)

(address)

Dear Ms. (wife’s last name) and

Mr. (husband’s last name)

Sincerely

Married couple, hyphenated last

name

Mr. and Mrs. (husband’s first name and middle

initial, plus wife’s original last name followed

by hyphen and husband’s last name)

(address)

Dear Mr. and Mrs. (wife’s original

last name followed by hyphen and

husband’s last name)

Sincerely

Organizations

Members (organization name)

(address)

Dear Members

Sincerely

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 211 -

Addressee

Address on Letter

Salutation / Complimentary Close

Informal Groups

Mr. (full name)

First Grade

Jefferson Elementary School

(address)

Dear Students

Sincerely

Former Government Officials

Former President

(no title used in address)

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Respectfully yours,

Former Vice President

(no title used in address)

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr. (last name)

Sincerely

Former Member of the Cabinet

addressed as “Secretary”

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr./Madam Secretary

Sincerely

Former Attorney General

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr./Madam Attorney General

Sincerely

Former Secretary of a Military

Department

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr./Ms. (last name)

Sincerely

Former Postmaster General

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr./Madam Postmaster

General

Sincerely

Former Senator

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Senator (last name)

Sincerely

Former Representative

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Representative (last name)

Sincerely

Former Justice

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Mr./Madam Justice

Sincerely

Former Judge

The Honorable (full name)

(address)

Dear Judge (last name)

Sincerely

Military Ranks and Abbreviations

Do you know the differences in the ranks of the Services? The DoD Manual for Written Material

also provides tables that present the pay grade, rank and rank abbreviations for all pay grades in all

the Services. These tables have been extracted and included in this handbook (reformatted for

conformity) for your ready reference. Take the time to learn the ranks of the other Services … and

the proper abbreviations for them as well. Using the proper rank in your communications with others

demonstrates your professional attitude and commands respect from others.

The Tongue and Quill

AFH 33-337, 27 MAY 2015

- 212 -

Military Ranks and Abbreviations, Officers

Pay

Grade

Army Navy Marine Corps Air Force

O-10

General

GEN

Admiral

ADM

General

Gen

General

Gen

O-9

Lieutenant General LTG Vice Admiral VADM Lieutenant General LtGen

Lieutenant

General

Lt Gen

O-8

Major General MG Rear Admiral RADM Major General

MajGen

Major

General

Maj Gen

O-7

Brigadier General BG Rear Admiral

RDML

Brigadier General BGen

Brigadier

General

Brig Gen

O-6

Colonel

COL

Captain

CAPT

Colonel

Col

Colonel

Col

O-5

Lieutenant Colonel LTC Commander CDR Lieutenant Colonel LtCol

Lieutenant

Colonel

Lt Col

O-4

Major MAJ

Lieutenant

Commander

LCDR Major Maj Major Maj

O-3

Captain

CPT

Lieutenant

Captain

Capt

Captain

Capt

O-2

First Lieutenant 1LT

Lieutenant Junior

Grade

LTJG First Lieutenant 1st Lt

First

Lieutenant

1st Lt

O-1

Second Lieutenant 2LT Ensign ENS Second Lieutenant 2nd Lt

Second

Lieutenant

2d Lt

W-5

Chief Warrant

Officer

CW5

Chief Warrant

Officer 5

CWO-5

W-4

Chief Warrant

Officer 4

CW4

Chief Warrant

Officer 4

CWO4

Chief Warrant

Officer 4

CWO-4

W-3

Chief Warrant

Officer 3

CW3

Chief Warrant

Officer 3

CWO3

Chief Warrant

Officer 3

CWO-3

W-2

Chief Warrant

Officer 2

CW2

Chief Warrant

Officer 2

CWO2

Chief Warrant

Officer 2

CWO-2

W-1

Warrant Officer 1 WO1 Warrant Officer WO1

Chief Warrant

Officer 1

CWO-1

The Army used Master Warrant Officer at one time; “Master” now indicates a transitional rank; all Army Warrant Officers

are Chief Warrant Officers.

The Navy Rear Admiral rank contains two levels: upper half, equal to a two-star flag officer, and lower half, equal to a

one-star flag officer. The rank of Commodore was a commissioned one-star rank during time of war. The commander of a

fleet of ships is sometimes referred to as “Commodore” as a courtesy title. The rank no longer exists and the title is never

officially used.

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

- 213 -

Military Ranks and Abbreviations, Enlisted

Pay

Grade

Army Navy Marine Corps Air Force

E-9

Sergeant

Major of the

Army

SMA

Master Chief

Petty Officer of

the Navy

MCPON

Sergeant

Major of the

Marine Corps

SgtMajMC

Chief Master

Sergeant of the

Air Force

CMSAF

Command

Sergeant

Major

CSM

Master Chief

Petty Officer

MCPO

Sergeant

Major

Sgt Maj

Chief Master

Sergeant

CMSgt

Sergeant

Major

SGM

Master

Gunnery

Sergeant

MGySgt

E-8

First Sergeant 1SG

Senior Chief

Petty Officer

SCPO First Sergeant 1stSgt

Senior Master

Sergeant

SMSgt

Master

Sergeant

MSG

Master

Sergeant

MSgt

E-7

Sergeant First

Class

SFC

Chief Petty

Officer

CPO

Gunnery

Sergeant

GySgt Master Sergeant

MSgt

E-6

Staff Sergeant SSG Petty Officer 1 PO1 Staff Sergeant SSgt

Technical

Sergeant

TSgt

E-5

Sergeant

SGT

Petty Officer 2

PO2

Sergeant

Sgt

Staff Sergeant

SSgt

E-4

Corporal

CPL

Petty Officer 3

PO3

Corporal

Cpl

Senior Airman

SrA

Specialist

SPC

E-3

Private First

Class

PFC Seaman SN

Lance

Corporal

LCpl

Airman First

Class

A1C

E-2

Private PV2

Seaman

Apprentice

Private First

Class

PFC Airman Amn

E-1

Private

PVT

Seaman Recruit

Private

Pvt

Airman Basic

The Personal Letter: Examples

The following personal letters are examples only. Due to the nearly infinite possible

combinations of sender and receiver—not to mention the countless types of messages—it is

essential to follow the guidance in the previous pages and to consult with your executive staff for

tips and techniques specific to your work setting. The first example is a personal letter written in

response to a notional inquiry about the format and purpose of the personal letter. This is

followed by several “thank you” letters—one with formatting shown; one with an attachment

and courtesy copy; and two finished product samples.

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A Personal Letter on the Format for a Personal Letter

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

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Personal Letter: Single Paragraph, Formatting Shown

CHAPTER 15

The Personal Letter

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Personal Letter: Short Text, Formatting Shown

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Personal Letter: Final Form

CHAPTER 16

Air Force “Papers”

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CHAPTER 16:

Air Force “Papers”

This chapter covers:

• Form and Function

• Point Paper

• Talking Paper (TP)

• Bullet Background Paper (BBP)

• Background Paper

• Position Paper

The Air Force uses written products (“papers”) in many forms for everyday staff work to serve a

variety of functions. The functions they serve are not unique to the Air Force, but the format of a

talking paper from one Air Force unit to the next should be the same. The goal of this chapter is

to clarify and set the Air Force standards for these papers. These standards apply to the young

and old alike: check your work to ensure your papers meet the format standard while also

answering the mail for the task requiring the paper in the first place. The sample papers in this

chapter contain the guidance for how to build each paper, respectively. For example, the point

paper sample is about writing a point paper. It contains guidance in the narrative on how to write

a point paper as well as a visual example of a finished point paper.

Form and Function

Where possible, the papers use the same or similar formats; however, there are key differences

since these papers all serve different functions, much like traffic signs can have similar

characteristics but serve different functions. For example, “STOP” and “YIELD” signs are both

red to alert us to an intersection but the shape and the text are different: drivers are expected to

act differently at a STOP sign then they are at a YIELD sign. The same concept holds true for

Air Force documents: the format supports the function. Know the different functions of Air

Force documents and use the right paper for the task.

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Plan your work

The text of your written products will be better if you build it with a plan, such as the seven steps

to effective communication presented in chapters 2 through 7. With good source materials you

can build your content as either bullet statements (bullets) for the point paper, talking paper and

bullet background paper; or as narrative for the other papers. Building better bullets (or

sentences) requires discipline and following a few fundamental rules (see chapter 19 for details).

The ABS of bullets

First, all bullet statements must be accurate, brief and specific (ABS). Because there is very little

text in a bullet, the text used must be unequivocal (accurate) while being as short as possible

(brief) to convey a tightly-focused (specific) point. Second, use the correct type of bullet for the

desired purpose–the single idea bullet or the accomplishment-impact bullet.

Single Idea Bullets

A single idea bullet is a concisely written statement of a single idea or concept. Single idea

bullets have exactly one idea in the bullet and the bullet serves a specific purpose. Single idea

bullets are commonly used in Point Papers and Talking Papers. They may also be used in Bullet

Background Papers; however, the bullets in Bullet Background Papers frequently have more

content within the bullet to support the single idea. See the example papers later in this chapter.

Accomplishment-Impact Bullets

An accomplishment-impact bullet is a concisely written statement of a person’s single

accomplishment and its impact on the unit’s mission, operations or other related tasks.

Accomplishment-impact bullets are typically used in performance reports, recommendations and

award submissions to describe someone’s work performance or noteworthy off-duty pursuits.

However, an accomplishment-impact bullet may be appropriate for the written products

described in chapter 16, depending on the purpose and audience. As the name implies,

accomplishment-impact bullets contain a clear statement of a single accomplishment that had an

impact on the mission, operations or other related tasks. The impact can be implied or specified

and should be clear to all readers. Specific impacts should place the accomplishment into

perspective (large or small).

1. The Accomplishment Element: Briefly describes the person’s actions or behavior.

a. What did the person (or group) do?

b. What was the success (or, less often, the failure)?

2. The Impact Element: Describes the results of the accomplishment and it may be either

expressly stated or implied. The impact element is vital to describing the relative

importance of the action.

a. What is the impact on the mission (squadron, group, wing, command, Air Force)?

b. Is this impact statement accurate in scope and strength?

c. Does it put things into perspective?

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Air Force “Papers”

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Form and Function Quick Reference Table

Form

Function

Point Paper

• Single issue

• Single page

• Bullets or phrases

• Minimal data

Memory jogger: minimal text outline of a single issue to

quickly inform others extemporaneously (no-notice)

• Conveys a single, narrow message in a very short time,

such as with an “elevator speech”

• Give the same short message many times

• Requires prior research and content memorization

Talking Paper (TP)

• Single issue

• Single page

• Bullets or phrases

• Key reference data

Speaking notes: outlines and narrates a single issue to

inform others during planned/scheduled oral presentations

• Serves as a quick reference on key points, facts,

positions

• Addresses frequently asked questions

• Can stand alone for basic understanding of the issue

Bullet Background Paper (BBP)

• Single issue or several related

issues and impact

• Single or multi-page

• Bullet statements

Background of a program, policy, problem or procedure;

may be a single issue or combination of several related

issues

• Concise chronology of program, policy, problem, etc.

• Summarizes an attached staff package

• Explains or details an attached talking paper

Background Paper

• Single issue or several related

issues and impact

• Multi-page

• Full sentences, details

• Numbered paragraphs

Multipurpose staff communications instrument to express

ideas or describe conditions that require a particular staff

action

• Detailed chronology of program, policy, problem, etc.

• Condenses and summarizes complex issues

• Provides background research for oral presentations or

staff discussions; informs decision makers with details

Position Paper

• Single issue or several related

issues and impact

• Multi-page

• Full sentences, details

• Numbered paragraphs

Working with proposals for new program, policy, or

procedure, or plan for working a problem

• Circulate a proposal to generate interest

(initiate the idea)

• Evaluate a proposal (respond to another’s idea)

•

Advocate a position on a proposal to decision makers

Staff Study

• Single issue or several related

issues and impact

• Multi-page research paper

• Detailed discussion with

conclusion & recommendations

• Format varies to meet need

Analyze a clearly defined problem, identify conclusions,

and make recommendations

• Assist decision makers and leaders in leading

• Research to inform and recommend change

• A problem-solving thought process in written form

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Point Paper

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Air Force “Papers”

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Talking Paper

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Bullet Background Paper

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Air Force “Papers”

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Background Paper

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Air Force “Papers”

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Position Paper

CHAPTER 17

The Staff Study

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CHAPTER 17:

The Staff Study

This chapter covers:

• Purpose

• Process: Critical Thinking and Problem Solving

• Writing the Report

• Complete the Study

Staff Studies are commonly written as official memorandums, but they are specialized in their

purpose and presentation. The narrative of this chapter is especially useful for those drafting

these types of reports for the first time, but they are also useful for experienced writers to check

their work and ensure their reports are answering the mail.

Purpose

The purpose of the staff study report is to analyze a problem, draw conclusions, and make

recommendations. Not all organizations routinely use the staff study, but it is an accepted format

for a problem-solution report for both the Air Force and Joint Staff. You may never write up a

problem-solution in the staff study format; however, if you understand and apply the essential

elements of problem analysis, you’ll be better prepared for any staff communication. The staff

study, as a thought process, is far more important as a process than what you call it or the format

used to communicate findings.

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Process: Critical Thinking and Problem Solving

1. Analyze the Audience. The study may be driven by higher headquarters or your own

observations on areas for improvement. In either case, there will be political and

operational constraints: do some reflective thinking about the operating environment.

2. Limit the problem. Manage the size of the task by setting the who, what, when, why

and how of the situation. Narrow the problem statement: do not include unnecessary

concerns. Vague or fuzzy problem statements lead to unacceptable reports.

For example, if the problem is the use of amphetamines and barbiturates among junior

Airmen, the problem statement “To reduce the crime rate on base” would be too broad.

So would “How to detect and limit the use of dangerous drugs on base.” More to the

point would be “To detect and end the causes of amphetamine and barbiturate use among

the junior Airmen at Wright-Patterson AFB.” The problem should eventually be stated in

one of three ways:

a. As a question (What should we do to …?)

b. As a statement of need or purpose (The base needs to be able to detect …)

c. As an infinitive phrase (To detect and end the causes of ground mishaps …)

3. Analyze the Whole Problem. Do the parts suggest other problems that need separate

handling or do the parts relate so closely to the whole that you need only one approach?

4. Gather Data. Collect all information pertinent to the problem. (Tips on how and where

to conduct staff research can be found in chapter 4).

5. Evaluate Your Information. Is the information from reliable witnesses? Is it from

qualified authorities? Does it qualify as solid support?

6. Organize Your Information. One way to organize information is to place it under

headings titled “Facts,” “Assumptions” and “Criteria.”

a. Facts should be facts, not opinions or assertions. Identify only those facts that

directly bear on the problem.

b. Assumptions are important because they are always necessary. To reduce a research

project to manageable size, it is usually necessary to accept certain things as being

true, even if you are not absolutely sure. The validity of your assumptions usually

has a great deal to do with the validity of your conclusions. Sometimes desired

conclusions can be supported with certain unrealistic assumptions. In evaluating

research, seek out the assumptions and make some judgment as to how reasonable

they are. If you feel they are unrealistic, make whatever assumptions you feel are

correct and try to judge their effect on the conclusions of the study. Sometimes a

perfectly logical study explodes in your face because your assumptions were

incredibly weak or simply not supportable.

c. Criteria are those standards, requirements or limitations used to test possible

solutions. The criteria for a problem-solution are sometimes provided in complete

form by your boss when you are assigned the problem. Sometimes criteria are

inherent in the nature of the obstacle causing the problem. The obstacle can only be

overcome within certain physical limits, and these limits will establish the criteria for

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the problem-solution. In most cases, however, criteria are usually inherent in your

own frame of reference and in the goal you are trying to attain. This goal and frame

of reference will tolerate only certain problem-solutions, and the limits of this

tolerance will establish the criteria for the problem-solution.

Any criteria will not be very useful if you cannot clearly test the possible solutions

against them! Since weak or irrelevant criteria are often seen in problem-solution

reports, let’s examine three examples of criteria and assess their value.

• “The total solution must not cost more than $6,000 annually.”

• “The solution must result in a 75 percent operationally ready (OR) rate.”

• “The solution must be consistent with the boss’ philosophy on personnel

management.”

Criterion one is fine; you could easily “bump” your proposed solutions against a

specific cost. Criterion two looks good on the surface, but OR rates result from

numerous, complex variables. You probably could not guarantee the decision maker

your “solution” would lead to a 75 percent OR rate. It might improve the OR rate or

actually lead to a rate higher than 75 percent, but before your boss actually

implements your solution, how would you know that? If a criterion cannot be used to

test solutions before implementation, it is not an acceptable criterion. Criterion three

isn’t bad, but it’s fuzzy. Perhaps it could be written more precisely or left off the

formal report altogether. You could still use it intuitively to check your solutions, but

realize when you use “hidden” criteria, your report will be less objective.

7. List Possible Solutions. Approach the task of creating solutions with an open mind.

Develop as many solutions as possible. The “brainstorming” technique using several

knowledgeable people is a popular approach to generating possible solutions.

8. Test Possible Solutions. Test each solution by using criteria formed while gathering

data. Weigh one solution against another after testing each. Be sensitive to your

personal biases and prejudices. Strive for professional objectivity.

9. Select Final Solution. Select the best possible solution—or a combination of the best

solutions—to fit the mission. Most Air Force problem-solutions fall into one of the three

patterns listed below. Do not force your report into a pattern where it does not fit.

a. Single best possible solution. This one is basic and the most commonly used. You

select the best solution from several possible ones.

b. Combination of possible solutions. You may need to combine two or more possible

solutions for your best possibilities.

c. Single possible solution. Rare; stand ready to defend why there are no alternatives.

10. Act. Capture the actions required for the final solution. Your comments here may lead

to the specific action(s) your boss should take to implement the solution (written into the

“Action Recommended” portion of the report). If there is no implementing document for

the decision maker to sign, specify what other action the boss must take to implement the

proposal. No solution is complete until action has been planned and executed.

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In actual practice, the steps of problem solving do not always follow a definite and orderly

sequence. The steps may overlap, more than one step may be considered at one time, or

developments at one step may require reconsideration of a previous step. For example, the data

you collect may force you to redefine the problem. Similarly, while testing solutions, you may

think of a new solution or, in the process of selecting a final solution, you may discover you need

additional information. In short, problem-solving may not be linear but all the steps should be

considered and investigated.

Writing the Report

The sections below present the suggested format for a staff study report. Use only those portions

of this format necessary for your particular report. If you omit certain paragraphs, renumber

subsequent paragraphs accordingly.

By now you probably realize the staff study is a problem-solution report that presents data

collected, discusses possible solutions to the problem, and indicates the best solution. It is not a

style to solve a problem. You should mentally solve your problem, and then report the solution

in writing. The format of the staff study report includes a heading, a body, an ending and, when

necessary, the attachments.

Heading

Leave the MEMORANDUM FOR element blank; this allows the report to seek its own level.

After FROM, enter your complete office address. After SUBJECT, briefly state the report’s

subject; however, use a few extra words if this will add meaning to your subject.

Body

The body contains five parts: (1) Problem, (2) Factors Bearing on the Problem,

(3) Discussion, (4) Conclusion and (5) Action Recommended. The parts of the body align

with the steps of problem solving, as shown below. No matter how you organize your report,

stive to: make it brief, maintain a sequence of thought throughout, show the reader how you

reasoned the problem through, and include enough information in the body of the report to make

sense without referring to the attachments (but do use attachments for support, as needed).

Steps of problem solving

Body of staff study

1. Recognize the problem

1. Problem

2. Gather data

2. Factors Bearing on the Problem

3. List possible solutions

3. Discussion

4. Test possible solutions

5. Select final solution

4. Conclusion (a brief restatement of final solution)

6. Act

5. Action Recommended

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1. Problem: The statement of the problem tells the reader what you are trying to solve. No

discussion is necessary at this point; a simple statement of the problem is sufficient. You

have ample opportunity to discuss all aspects of the problem later in the report.

2. Factors Bearing on the Problem: This part contains the facts, assumptions, criteria and

definitions you used to build possible solutions to your problem. Devote separate

paragraphs to facts, assumptions, criteria and definitions as shown in the sample study

report. Obviously, if you write a report in which you have no assumptions or definitions,

omit either or both. Include only those important factors you used to solve your problem.

Briefly state whatever you include. Put lengthy support material in attachments. Write

each sentence completely so you don’t force the reader to refer to the attachments to

understand what you’ve written.

3. Discussion: This part of the report is crucial; it shows the logic used to solve the

problem. Generally, some background information is necessary to properly introduce

your problem. The introduction may be one or several paragraphs, depending on the

detail required. Once the intro is complete, use one of the following outlines to discuss

your thought process.

a. When using the single best possible solution:

(1) List all possible solutions you think will interest the decision maker.

(2) Show how you tested each possible solution against the criteria, listing both the

advantages and disadvantages. Use the same criteria to test each possible

solution.

(3) Show how you weighed each possible solution against the others to select the best

possible solution.

(4) Clearly indicate the best possible solution.

b. When using a combination of possible solutions:

(1) List all the possible solutions you think will interest the decision maker.

(2) Show how you tested each possible solution against the criteria, listing both the

advantages and disadvantages. Use the same criteria to test each possible

solution.

(3) Show how you weighed each possible solution against the other possible solutions

and why you retained certain ones as a partial solution to the problem.

(4) Show how and why you combined the retained possible solutions.

c. When using the single possible solution:

(1) List your single solution.

(2) Test it against the criteria.

(3) Show how and why this solution will solve the problem.

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4. Conclusion: The conclusion must provide a complete, workable solution to the problem.

The conclusion is nothing more than a brief restatement of the best possible solution or

solutions. The conclusion must not continue the discussion. It should completely satisfy

the requirements of the problem; it should never introduce new material.

5. Action Recommended: Word the recommendations so your boss need only sign for

action. Do not recommend alternatives. This does not mean you cannot consider

alternative solutions in the “Discussion.” It means you commit yourself to the line of

action you judge best. You must relieve the decision maker of the research and study

necessary to decide from several alternatives. Give precise guidance on what you want

the decision maker to do; i.e., “Sign the implementing letter at attachment 1.” (Normally,

implementing documents should be the first attachment.) Recommendations like

“Recommend further study” or “Either solution A or B should be implemented” indicate

the decision maker picked the wrong person to do the study.

Ending

The ending contains the name, rank and duty title of the person or persons responsible for the

report and a listing of attachments. Use the official memorandum format for the signature block

and attachments.

Attachments

Since the body of the staff study report must be brief, relegate as much of the detail as possible to

the attachments. Although seldom required, identify material needed to support an attachment as

an appendix to the attachment. Include, as attachments, the directives necessary to support the

recommended actions. Here is some addition guidance for attachments:

• The body may reference the authority directing the study. An attachment may contain an

actual copy of the directive.

• The body may contain an extract or a condensed version of a quotation. An attachment

may contain a copy of the complete quotation.

• The body may contain a statement that requires support. An attachment may state the

source and include the material that verifies that statement.

• The body may refer to a chart or information in a chart. An attachment may include the

complete chart (designed to fit the format of the report or folded to fit inside the report.)

• If directives or detailed instructions are required to implement the recommended action,

include the drafts as attachments.

Tabs

Number tabs to help the reader locate attachments or appendices. Affix each tab to a blank sheet

of paper immediately preceding the attachment. If it is not practical to extract the supporting

material from a long or complex document used as an attachment, affix the tab to that page

within the attachment or appendix where the supporting material is located. Position the tab for

attachments as you would for an official memorandum (bottom right on tab cover page for

attachment 1 and then slightly higher for each succeeding attachment so all tabs can be seen).

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Complete the Study

A good staff study report should represent completed staff work. This means the staff member

has completed the analysis and presented a complete solution—a complete study—to the boss.

The solution should be complete enough that the decision maker has only to approve or

disapprove. Inexperienced staff members may succumb to the impulse to ask the chief what to

do when the problem is difficult. However, your job is to advise your boss what should be

done—provide answers, not questions. Of course, it’s okay to inquire at any point in the

problem-solving procedure if you need to find out whether you are on the right track. This

coordination often saves untold hours.

Tips

Consider the following tips for problem-solving and preparing a staff study:

• Be creative! Completed staff work provides the opportunity to be heard.

• Schedule time to work the problem. Most problems worthy of analysis require

considerable study and reflection.

• Do not assume there is a “school solution” and avoid reductionist “solutions” that assume

obstacles do not exist. Conversely, a complex study with a thick report is not necessarily

better. Good decision makers focus on the relevance and accuracy of the material and the

logic of the argument: be relevant, accurate, and logical in the study.

• Do not work a study in isolation. If you point your finger at someone or some unit, or if

the solution requires a change in someone’s operation, you’d better get their reaction

before you drop the bomb. You can look mighty foolish if you find out later they were

operating under a constraint of which you were unaware.

• Does the study answer the mail? If you were the boss, would you be willing to stake

your professional reputation on the study? If the answer is “no,” it is time to start over.

Format

The format of the final staff study report will certainly be less important than the content; but a

poor format will distract readers. Start with the format for the official memorandum: all the

elements of the official memorandum may be used (i.e., references, attachments, courtesy copies,

and distribution lists). For long studies, an official memorandum as a cover letter followed by

the study (as an attachment) may be in order. Your work environment may drive the need for a

different format or additional information; but, in the end, these reports are simply specialized

applications of the official memorandum.

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The Staff Study Report Outline

CHAPTER 18

The Staff Package

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CHAPTER 18:

The Staff Package

This chapter covers:

• SSS Fundamentals

• Completing the SSS Form

• Assembling the Package

• Coordinating the Package

• Sample SSS and eSSS

When you have a staff package that must be coordinated, whether the package is a single page or

several volumes, you need something to pull the package together and guide it through the

staffing process. Some commands use a software application, such as Task Management Tool,

for the staffing process. However, Air Force Form 1768, Staff Summary Sheet, is still used

throughout the Air Force. The Staff Summary Sheet (known as “SSS” or “triple-S”) is the first

page of a staff package or the body of the e-mail for the electronic SSS (eSSS).

This discussion here applies to all staff packages where Air Force Form 1768 or its e-mail

cousin, the eSSS, is used. Air Force Form 1768 is currently generated by a software application

(AF IMT 1768, 19840901, V5 as of this writing) which may be printed for paper packages or

sent as an attachment to an e-mail and signed digitally by coordinating officials. Regardless of

the method used, paper or electronic, SSS fundamentals, arrangement, and coordination remain

the same.

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SSS Fundamentals

The SSS is a versatile tool that introduces, summarizes and coordinates the package through

appropriate staff offices and officials using the chain of command. Frequently, the SSS is used

to coordinate a package so that the last official is fully informed on an issue and can approve the

package and/or sign an attachment to implement action associated with the package.

The versatility of the SSS is clear when used in printed form. Printed SSS forms often contain

handwritten notes before reaching the approval authority. These notes capture essential thoughts

of coordinating officials as it moves through the staff. As a hands-on tool, the SSS form does not

require the same level of perfection, such as error-free typing, as the correspondence it covers.

In addition to the notes of coordinating officials, the SSS may be corrected neatly and legibly in

ink if the content and meaning are still intelligible and clear.

In addition, consider the following fundamentals and guidelines for completing the SSS form:

• Use: Use Air Force Form 1768 only with the staff package it summarizes; do not use the

form in place of a memorandum or handwritten note.

• Placement: The SSS is attached to the front of the package since it introduces and

summarizes the relevant portions of all attached documents. You should not attach a

document if it is not relevant to the package or if it is not mentioned on the SSS.

• Length: The SSS is usually limited to a single page since the form is a single page. If

additional coordination or summary space is needed, follow these guidelines:

o Coordination Overflow: If more than ten offices need coordinate on the package, the

first ten offices are listed on the original SSS. Beneath the original SSS, add a second

AF Form 1768 that has the “TO” blocks renumbered from 11 to 20 and is completed

through the subject. The second SSS is attached behind the original SSS.

o Summary Overflow: Use plain bond paper if additional “Summary” space is needed.

Completing the SSS Form

The software application for AF IMT 1768 sets the format for page setup, font, point size and

margins, so users can focus on the content of the form. The coordination section vectors the

package through the staff and documents coordination. The action officer and subject tell

readers who generated the SSS and the subject of the package. The summary captures the

essence of the package and all attached documents to inform the final official to act or to be

ready to act. These sections are broken into blocks that should be completed as follows:

Coordination, Action Officer, Subject and Date

• TO: List offices in the order that they should coordinate, approve or sign.

• ACTION: Show the action desired in this column

o “Coord” for Coordination

o “Appr” for Approval (normally only one “Appr” and/or one “Sig” entry per SSS).

o “Sig” for Signature (normally only one “Appr” and/or one “Sig” entry per SSS).

o “Info” for Information (when the SSS is submitted for information only)

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• SIGNATURE (Surname), GRADE AND DATE: This block is broken into two parts. If

you are the addressee and you agree with the proposed action, sign your surname, rank or

grade, and date on the bottom SIGNATURE line aligned with your office symbol. If you

are not the addressee, sign on the top SIGNATURE line aligned with your office symbol.

• SURNAME OF ACTION OFFICER AND GRADE: Rank and last name of action

officer.

• SYMBOL: Enter action officer’s organization and office symbol (e.g., AF/A1).

• PHONE: The action officer’s telephone number (DSN or full 10-digit commercial).

• TYPIST’S INITIALS: Enter the initials of the typist who completed the form.

• SUSPENSE DATE: Enter the suspense date, if any, as appropriate.

• SUBJECT: Enter subject; use the same subject as for the attached correspondence.

• DATE: Type or stamp date at time of dispatch from the signing official’s office.

Summary Section

The summary section is heart of the SSS and is adaptable to the purpose or function the package.

There are many ways to use the limited space of the summary block efficiently. A common

technique is the use of headings. With or without headings, the paragraphs in the summary

section are numbered and lettered in the same manner as in an official memorandum.

The guidance here merges the common elements from examples, instructions and experience for

completing the summary section with five headings: Purpose, Background, Discussion, Views

of Others and Recommendation. These five headings provide a common baseline for all Air

Force personnel in completing the SSS, but they can be adapted for local needs, recurring tasks

and command preferences. Check with your command for local guidance.

Purpose

The purpose statement tells readers what the SSS is trying to accomplish. The purpose statement

may simply be a restatement of the subject. If the purpose is more complex, provide readers a

clear statement of the issue and what action is being requested. Another technique is to use the

purpose to provide the bottom line up front (BLUF) in the form of a purpose statement.

Background

The background section provides readers (the chain of command) with pertinent historical or

contextual factors that shape the issue. Background information should be presented in a logical

order (chronologically, geographically, functionally, etc.) appropriate for the issue to answer key

questions (what happened, so what and why) as the narrative builds. Finally, save space by

using a writing style with run-in headings and telegraphic statements/bullets.

Discussion

This is the meat of the analysis. Discuss the primary point or outline the main points first. Next,

link the background information to the discussion with logical analysis. Lead readers to be able

to see the way ahead proposed. Follow the logic and organization as used for the background

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(chronologically, geographically, functionally, etc.) appropriate to the issue. Also, if there are

several options or courses of action available, they should be covered in the discussion. Finally,

save space by using a writing style with run-in headings and telegraphic statements/bullets.

Views of Others

The views of others highlight opposing views, how they were considered but not recommended,

and why. They are essential for a complete analysis, thorough discussion, and proper staffing of

the package. This section requires pre-work to engage other offices impacted by the SSS before

formal coordination, but when properly socialized early, the package will have broad support

during formal coordination. If there are known disagreements or alternatives, present them here

so that there are no secrets and the SSS can move forward rather than back to you for more work.

In some cases, the views of others will not be needed, such as when there are no disagreements

or when the SSS is used for a routine task. In these situations, the views of others may be

marked as either “N/A” or deleted, as preferred by your chain of command.

Recommendation

State the recommendation for the senior official, including any action necessary to implement it,

in such a way that the official need only sign an attached document to coordinate, approve or

disapprove the recommended action. Use this heading only when SSS is routed for action; do

not use the recommendation heading when the SSS is submitted for information only.

Signature block

The signature blocks for AF Form 1768 and the eSSS are the same; however, you must take care

when sending the staff package so that the signature and the signature block match.

• AF Form 1768: Use the signature block for the action officer or the official designated

as the office of primary responsibility (OPR) for the SSS package. The signature block is

placed flush with the left margin with “//SIGNED//” (to indicate official Air Force

information) above the official’s name, rank, service affiliation, duty title, organization,

and contact information (telephone and/or e-mail). The signature must match the

signature block: do not sign “for” another official; and do not use an authority line.

• eSSS as an e-mail: Use the signature block for the action officer or the official

designated as the office of primary responsibility (OPR) for the SSS package. The

signature block is placed flush with the left margin with “//SIGNED//” (to indicate

official Air Force information) above the official’s name, rank, service affiliation, duty

title, organization, and contact information (telephone and/or e-mail). The signature

block and the system-generated “From” information must match: do not sign “for”

another official; do not use an authority line; do not add slogans, quotes, or other

personalization to an official e-mail signature block.

Tabs

For AF Form 1768, list Tabs aligned at the center in line with the signature block. For the eSSS

(e-mail), list Tabs flush with the left margin below the signature block with one blank line

between the signature block and the Tabs list.

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Assembling the Package

SSS packages are assembled using the same basic logic and process used to assemble and attach

tabs to official memorandums (see chapter 14). The primary difference for SSS packages is that

some documents may already have attachments so the entire package must be clearly marked.

Clear marking requires differentiating “tabs” from “Tabs.” When “tabs” is written in all lower

case letters, it refers to the physical dividers attached to each document or divider page, whereas

“Tabs,” with a capital T, refers to the major groups of information attached to the primary SSS.

The Tongue and Quill recommends using blank pages with tabs to separate the major groups of

information (e.g., outgoing, incoming and background). Likewise, attachments to Tabs may be

separated by blank pages with the tab attached to serve as a divider between attachments. With

this in mind, list attachments to the SSS as Tabs or attachments as follows:

• Tab 1: Mark the primary document for action, signature, or approval as Tab 1.

o Attachments to Tab 1: Mark any attachments to the primary document at Tab 1 as

attachments (Atch 1, Atch 2, etc.).

o If you have more than one document for action, mark the second document as Tab 2;

the third as Tab 3; and so forth.

• Tab 2: List the incoming letter, directive, or other paper that prompted the SSS as Tab 2

(or sequentially after the last action document). Attachments to Tabs are sequentially

numbered from “1” for each Tab (Atch 1, Atch 2, etc.).

• Tab 3: List supplemental documents as additional tabs followed by the record or

coordination copy and information copies. Attachments are marked as in Tab 2, above.

• If non-concurrence is involved, list it and the letter or rebuttal as the last tab.

General Order of SSS Documents

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Tab Placement on SSS Package Documents

Coordinating the Package

• Agreement: If you are the addressee and you agree with the proposed action, sign your

surname, rank or grade, and date on the bottom SIGNATURE line aligned with your

office symbol. If you are not the addressee (i.e., you work in the office but are not the

head of the office), sign on the top SIGNATURE line aligned with the office symbol.

• Disagreement: When you do not agree with the proposed action, write a memorandum

to the action office stating your reasons and write in ink “See Memorandum” in the

signature column. Attach your memorandum and return it to the action office.

• Resolving differences: As the action officer, try to resolve all differences when you

receive a non-concurrence on a SSS.

o If you cannot resolve the differences, the action officer must write a rebuttal

memorandum to the approval authority which states differences discussed with the

non-concurring official and explains why you cannot change the proposed action.

Attach the rebuttal memorandum and the non-concurrence memorandum as the last

tab to the original AF Form 1768, and annotate in pen the additional tab under the list

of tabs. Send it to the next addressee shown on the AF Form 1768.

o If you resolve differences and no changes are made to the AF Form 1768 or to any

attachments, the previously non-concurring official shows concurrence by marking

through the statement “See Memorandum” and signing surname, rank or grade, and

date. The action officer writes “Differences resolved and no changes needed” on the

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non-concurrence memorandum, initials the statement, and attaches this memorandum

to the record or coordination copy. Then, send the package to the next addressee.

o If you resolve differences and changes are made to the AF Form 1768 or to any

attachments, the action officer must prepare a new AF Form 1768 and coordinate it as

a new package with all offices.

• Closure: The final reviewer, approval official or signature official sends the package

back to the OPR to close the task. One technique is to include the OPR’s office symbol

as the final block in the coordination section with “File” as the action to ensure the

package is vectored to the source for closure.

Sample SSS and eSSS

The guidance and examples that follow are derived from multiple sources and experience;

however, check with your command officials for guidance or supplements to AFMAN 33-326.

SSS Format Standards (AF IMT 1768)

• Format:

o Page setup, margins, font, point size and text wrapping: Set by the application for AF

IMT 1768; cannot be changed by users.

o Tabs: Center aligned in line with the signature block lines (see sample SSS, below).

o Line spacing: Single space within paragraphs (no blank lines); double space between

first-level paragraphs (one blank line) and before “//SIGNED//.”

o Paragraph numbering: Number or letter all paragraphs at the left margin. Paragraphs

may be sub-divided using the same outline structure as for the official memorandum.

• Content: The form-generating software limits the SSS to a single page. If additional

coordination or summary space is needed, follow the “SSS Fundamentals” guidance

repeated below:

o Coordination Overflow: If more than ten offices need coordinate on the package, the

first ten offices are listed on the original SSS form. Beneath the original SSS form,

add a second AF Form 1768 that has the “TO” blocks renumbered from 11 to 20 and

is completed through the subject. The second SSS is attached behind the original

SSS.

o Summary Overflow: Use plain bond paper if additional “Summary” space is needed.

• Signature block: Use the signature block for the action officer or the official designated

as the office of primary responsibility (OPR) for the SSS package. The signature block is

placed flush with the left margin with “//SIGNED//” (to indicate official Air Force

information) above the official’s name, rank, service affiliation, duty title, organization,

and contact information (telephone and/or e-mail). The signature must match the

signature block: do not sign “for” another official; and do not use an authority line. .

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SSS Sample (AF IMT 1768)

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eSSS Format (Body of an e-mail)

The eSSS as the body of an e-mail serves the same purposes and has the same elements as the

Air Force Form 1768. The primary difference is that you do not use a form to fill in the required

coordination, identification and summary elements. If the eSSS format is chosen, the action

officer or official designated as the office of primary responsibility (OPR) transmits package

electronically (e-mail or other electronic staffing software) to the first reviewer to

coordinate/comment. The first reviewer forwards the package, with any comments and all the

attachments, to the next reviewer. This procedure is repeated until last reviewer listed in the

eSSS coordination section has coordinated on the package. The last reviewer forwards the entire

package back to the OPR for final action and/or to close the task. With this in mind, consider the

following sample SSS and eSSS.

• Format:

o Page setup and margins: Typically set by the e-mail application.

o Font/point size: Times New Roman font, 12 points.

o Text wrapping: Text for all paragraphs wraps to the left margin.

o Tabs: List Tabs flush with the left margin below the signature block with one blank

line between the signature block and the Tabs list.

o Line spacing: Single space within paragraphs (no blank lines); double space between

first-level paragraphs (one blank line) and between elements (AO line to SUSPENSE

line; RECOMMENDATION to “//SIGNED//,” signature block to Tabs, etc.)

o Paragraph numbering: Number or letter all paragraphs at the left margin. Paragraphs

may be sub-divided using the same outline structure as for the official memorandum.

• Content: All the sections of the SSS are combined in the body of the e-mail. The first

section in the e-mail is the coordination section. The second section combines the staff

summary with action officer contact information and the suspense date. While there are

no page limits with the eSSS per se, action officers should strive to keep the eSSS

summary concise—no longer than two pages when printed. Check with your local

command section for further guidance.

• Signature block: Use the signature block for the action officer or the official designated

as the office of primary responsibility (OPR) for the SSS package. The signature block is

placed flush with the left margin with “//SIGNED//” (to indicate official Air Force

information) above the official’s name, rank, service affiliation, duty title, organization

and contact information (telephone and/or e-mail). The signature block and the

system-generated “From” information must match: do not sign “for” another official;

do not use an authority line; do not add slogans, quotes, or other personalization to an

official e-mail signature block.

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eSSS Sample (Body of an e-mail)

From: [system-generated user information]

To: [appropriate organizational account, individuals, or distribution list for ACTION]

Cc: [as required for INFORMATION]

Subject: SIGN: Suspense 19 Jun 14; eSSS Format

Date: [system-generated date-time group]

---------------------COORDINATION---------------------

Office Action Last Name/Rank/Date

Org/Sym Coord Heinz, Lt Col, 17 Jun 14

Org/Sym Appr/Sig Smith, Col, 19 Jun 14

---------------------STAFF SUMMARY---------------------

AO: MSgt First M. Last, Org/Sym, DSN 888-9990

SUSPENSE: 25 Jun 14

1. PURPOSE: Present perspective and analysis of an issue (answer the “what” question).

2. BACKGROUND:

a. Pertinent historical or contextual factors that shape the issue; answers “so what?” and “why?”

b. Presented in logical order (chronologically, geographically, functionally, etc.) that supports

movement through the package from PURPOSE to RECOMMENDATION.

3. DISCUSSION:

a. The meat of the analysis with the primary point or outline of main points first.

b. Links background with logical analysis; indicates the way ahead; answers “now what?”

c. For additional guidance, see the sample SSS and eSSS in AFH 33-327.

4. VIEWS OF OTHERS: [“N/A” or delete, if none, as preferred by your chain of command]

a. Highlight opposing views and how they were considered but not recommended and why.

b. Complete the thoughts of the discussion (demonstrates proper staffing and analysis).

5. RECOMMENDATION: [Official] approve/sign letter at Tab 1.

//SIGNED//

FIRST M. LAST, MSgt, USAF

Duty Title

Organization

DSN 888-9990 / (334) 953-9990

first.last@us.af.mil

2 Tabs

1. Memorandum for signature

2. AFH 33-337, The Tongue and Quill

Tabs are aligned at the left margin for the eSSS.

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CHAPTER 19:

Writing Better Bullet Statements

This chapter covers:

• Getting started

• Drafting Accomplishment-Impact Bullet Statements

• Polishing Accomplishment-Impact Bullet Statements

• Bullet Statement Mechanics

Bullet statements are used in many Air Force documents, from the Air Force papers discussed in

chapter 16 to the official personnel records of Airmen. While this chapter focuses on writing

better bullet statements for use in personnel records, the principles here can be used to improve

any written product wherever bullet statements are used.

Performance reports/appraisals (officer, enlisted and civilian), awards and decorations are part of

everyone’s permanent personnel records. These records are used by commanders, managers and

supervisors to document an individual’s performance over a specific period of time. If you

supervise just one person, you play a vital role in his/her career. You provide the opportunities

for success and you have the obligation to document employee performance.

Through leadership, mentoring and effective writing, you can ensure the employees you

supervise are afforded opportunities for success and increased responsibilities by documenting

their success on performance reports/appraisals, awards and decorations. The guidance here is

general in nature; you must ensure all performance reports/appraisals, awards and decorations

you prepare follow appropriate instructions/regulations and applicable command guidance. Of

course, the most important part of documenting performance is getting started.

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Getting Started

• Get Organized: Keep records of all the accomplishments, awards, and recommendations for

all those you supervise. Create a file folder—paper, electronic or both—for each employee

and make regular entries to everyone’s folder. This will drive you to keep in touch with your

subordinates and involved in their professional development.

• Know the Format: Most evaluation forms are written using bullet statements. Use the font

and point size specified by the governing instruction or software used to produce the report.

• Editing: The Tongue and Quill includes a section on “The Mechanics of Writing” with

guidance for grammar, punctuation, abbreviations, capitalization, hyphens and numbers to

help you avoid misspelled words, typographical errors and other mistakes that reflect poorly

on you and distract officials reading the report.

• Write Effectively: Get the reader’s attention. Positive words and phrases leave a lasting

impression with readers. Neutral or negative words and phrases give the impression that the

person you are writing about is average or below average.

Drafting Accomplishment-Impact Bullet Statements

The heart of effective writing involves writing effective accomplishment-impact statements. If

you are like many supervisors, you’ve likely stared at a blank report and wondered, “How in the

world do I even start to write effective bullet statements?” Whether you are in that situation for

the first or 100th time, here are some steps that will help you write effective accomplishment-

impact bullets.

Step 1: Extract the Facts

The first step is the hardest part of bullet statement writing—getting started! Supervisors often

get in trouble early because they do not capture information on their employees regularly or

completely. Without a good file of accomplishments for each employee, it is hard to write about

what each has accomplished.

Gather the Information

Begin by getting organized and creating a file for each employee. Collect all of the information

you can find that is relevant to each accomplishment and file this information in the file you have

created for that employee. Capture everything you can—direct information and support that may

be remotely related to the accomplishment—on paper or electronically. What looks unimportant

today may be a key piece of information later. As you gather information and make annotations,

consider the following tips for what to look for and how to mark what you find:

• Isolate the action: Isolate and record the specific action the person performed.

• Annotate the record: Mark the action with a power verb that best describes the action

(e.g., repaired, installed, designed, etc.).

• Measure the action: Document related numerical information (number of items fixed,

dollars saved, man-hours expended, people served, pages written, etc.).

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• Connect the dots: Document how this accomplishment impacted the bigger picture and

broader mission of the unit, group, wing, installation, command or Air Force.

• Ask the member: Facts and figures do not always present themselves easily. Talk to

the people you supervise. They are in the best position to clarify information on the tasks

they perform, provide details about what they have accomplished, and inform you on

how the task was done (e.g., saving time, treasure or talent).

• Ask others and check the tech: Ask coworkers and other supervisors who may have

seen this person in action. Also, consult Technical Orders, customers served, letters of

appreciation, automated work production documents or other sources to get all the

information you need.

• Capture from the start: Track your subordinate’s accomplishments as they happen.

Keep a record of significant work performance (both good and bad). This habit will help

you be prepared when it’s time for a performance report, feedback, award or decoration.

Gathering information does not take as much time if it is performed regularly. Be prepared to

schedule ample time with your people and make notes on what you need to include (or verify) in

an employee’s record. If you think gathering information as a routine takes too much time,

consider how long it will take to write a good performance report, award or decoration request

without the information—and how much you will spend tracking it down in the face of deadlines

and irate superiors. Without documented information on performance, you are forced to rely

upon loose generalizations and vague statements rather than convincing facts.

Sort the Information

With the information you have gathered, the next task is to sort the useful items from the items

that are not useful. Test each item to see if it is truly associated with the accomplishment you

identified earlier or if the item is unrelated to the accomplishment. The test is to ask, “Is this bit

of information solidly connected to this single accomplishment?” If the answer is yes, flag the

information as useful. If the answer is no, line through or flag the information as not useful—but

never throw it away or delete it! Although it may not be useful now, it may be just what you

need for another bullet later. Continue applying this question to all of the items you’ve collected

for this bullet statement. Once the bits of information are sorted, you will have a stack of

information that pertains precisely to the accomplishment and the bullet statement to be written.

Step 2: Build the Bullet’s Structure

The next step is to take the sorted information and organize it into an accomplishment-impact

bullet. Group the sorted items for each accomplishment as either the accomplishment (the what)

or the impact (who, when, how, why).

The Accomplishment Element

The accomplishment element begins with an action. Action is best expressed with strong action

verbs. The table, below, contains a short list of action verbs that can be used to start bullet

statements. These are not all the action verbs that can be used, but it should get you started in

writing that next evaluation, appraisal, award or decoration package.

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Action Verbs for the Accomplishment Element

Accomplished

Achieved

Acquired

Acted

Activated

Actuated

Adapts

Adhered

Adjusted

Administered

Advised

Agitated

Analyzed

Anticipated

Applied

Appraised

Approved

Aroused

Arranged

Articulated

Assembled

Asserted

Assessed

Assigned

Assisted

Assured

Attained

Attend

Authorized

Averted

Bolstered

Brought

Build

Calculated

Capitalized

Catalyzed

Chaired

Challenged

Clarified

Collaborate

Collected

Commanded

Communicated

Compared

Compelled

Competed

Compiled

Completed

Composed

Comprehend

Computed

Conceived

Concentrated

Conducted

Conformed

Confronted

Considered

Consolidated

Consulted

Contacted

Continued

Contracted

Contributed

Controlled

Cooperate

Coordinated

Created

Cultivated

Delegated

Demonstrated

Deterred

Developed

Devised

Displayed

Dominated

Drove

Elicited

Embodied

Emerged

Emulated

Encouraged

Endeavored

Energized

Enforced

Enhanced

Enriched

Ensured

Escalated

Established

Exceeded

Excelled

Expanded

Expedited

Exploited

Explored

Fabricated

Facilitated

Focused

Forced

Formulated

Generated

Grasped

Helped

Honed

Identified

Ignited

Impassioned

Implemented

Improved

Initiated

Inspired

Insured

Invigorated

Kindled

Launched

Maintained

Manipulated

Motivated

Organized

Originated

Overcame

Oversaw

Performed

Perpetuated

Persevered

Persuaded

Planned

Practiced

Prepared

Produced

Projected

Promoted

Prompted

Propagated

Propelled

Quantified

Rallied

Recognized

Rectified

Refined

Reformed

Regenerated

Rehabilitated

Rejuvenated

Renewed

Renovated

Reorganized

Required

Resolved

Revived

Sacrificed

Scrutinized

Sought

Solved

Sparked

Spearheaded

Stimulated

Strengthened

Strove

Supervised

Supported

Surpassed

Sustained

Transformed

Utilized

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In some cases, action verbs alone just cannot fully stress the strength or depth of someone’s

accomplishment. If you need to give action verbs an added boost, use an adverb to modify the

verb. Most adverbs are really easy to pick out … they end with the letters “ly.” Try connecting

some of the adverbs listed below to the verbs listed above to get a feel for how the adverb-verb

combination can intensify the accomplishment element.

Adverbs for the Accomplishment Element:

Actively

Aggressively

Anxiously

Ardently

Articulately

Assertively

Avidly

Boldly

Competitively

Compulsively

Creatively

Decisively

Eagerly

Energetically

Enterprisingly

Enthusiastically

Expeditiously

Exuberantly

Feverishly

Fiercely

Forcefully

Frantically

Impulsively

Incisively

Innovatively

Intensely

Powerfully

Promptly

Prosperously

Provocatively

Quickly

Relentlessly

Restlessly

Spiritedly

Spontaneously

Swiftly

Tenaciously

Vigorously

Vigilant

Now that you get the general idea about how to begin the accomplishment element, let’s look at

the rest of this critical part of the bullet statement. Broadly speaking, the accomplishment

element contains all the words that describe a single action performed by a person. While this

sounds simple, this rule is violated frequently. If two or more actions are combined together in

the same bullet, each of the actions is forced to share the strength of that entire statement. So

rather than combining two or more actions to strengthen a single bullet, writers must ensure

bullets focus on only one accomplishment. Two examples of an accomplishment element are

below: one uses simply an action verb; the second uses a modifier (adverb) for added emphasis.

- Processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility Exercise

- Tenaciously processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW

Mobility Exercise

In summary, the accomplishment element begins with some form of action (action verb only or a

modifier plus action verb) and contains a factual, focused description of one single action or

accomplishment. With that established, let’s look at the impact element.

The Impact Element (Impact and Results)

The impact element explains how the person’s actions had an effect on the organization and the

level of impact (e.g., work center, unit, wing, Air Force or Department of Defense). However,

the scope of the impact should be consistent with the person’s accomplishment. For example, if

the accomplishment explains how a person processed a large number of records during a base

exercise, the impact should not be stretched to show how the Air Force will save millions of

dollars. The impact must be accurate (more on that later); be careful not to stretch the truth when

rendering full credit for someone’s accomplishment. For the accomplishment element above, the

impact element could be as follows:

- … all wing personnel met their scheduled clock times

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Connecting the Accomplishment and Impact Elements

“ing”: Connecting the accomplishment and impact elements together can be done several ways.

One of the ways is to use the “ing” form of words. See how the word “ensuring” connects our

two elements in the example below:

- Processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility Exercise

ensuring all wing personnel met their scheduled clock times

Punctuation: Another way to connect these two elements together is to use punctuation that

joins phrases together (conjunctive punctuation). The most common form of conjunctive

punctuation in bullet statements is the semicolon. Let’s set off our previous example with a

semicolon to see this approach in action:

- Processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility Exercise;

all wing personnel met their scheduled clock times

Multiple impacts: If you have a situation where a single accomplishment has more than one

significant impact, you may show each impact element separately but using sub-bullets. The

bullet statement format for a multiple impact accomplishment separates the accomplishment

element as the single dash (-) bullet statement followed by impact element sub-bullets with a

double dash (--). Start each impact element sub-bullet with an action verb.

- Processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility Exercise

-- Ensured all wing personnel met their scheduled clock times

-- Helped the wing garner an overall “OUTSTANDING” rating from the IG team

CAUTION: The multiple impacts method of writing bullets for a single accomplishment takes a

great deal of space where space is limited (evaluation forms). Some commands do not allow the

use of multiple impact lines under a single accomplishment. Check with your local command for

guidance. Similarly, familiarize yourself with the appropriate MAJCOM/Base/Wing/unit level

guidance for commonly used acronyms, abbreviations, etc. to ensure your documents are

complete and well written.

Step 3: Streamline the Final Product

Review: After extracting the facts we built the structure of the performance bullet by separating

the information into two elements: the accomplishment element and the impact element. Then

we connected the two elements and applied standards to make the bullets strong and meaningful.

Now we need to streamline the final product and make the bullet statements accurate, brief and

specific (ABS).

Accuracy

Accurate bullets are a must. To be accurate, they must also be correct. If the facts are stretched,

exaggerated or embellished, then accuracy is lost. Exaggeration or embellishment, no matter

how minor, is not the truth. Evaluations, appraisals, awards and decorations are permanent

official records—let them be full of facts and truth that reflects our core values.

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Brevity

Editing for brevity accomplishes two tasks. First, select words that are shortest and clearest, yet

most descriptive to the readers. This means that long, confusing words or phrases are replaced

with short, clear, common terms. Second, eliminate or reduce unnecessary words. Some of the

words that all bullet writers should be looking to eliminate (or at least sharply reduce) are:

• Articles: a, an, the

• Helping verbs: can, could, may, might, must, ought, shall, should, will, would

• Also forms of be, have, and do

o Forms of be: be, am, is, are, was, were, been, being

o Forms of have: have, has, had, having

o Forms of do: do, does, did

• Linking verbs: forms of verbs associated with five senses: look, sound, smell, feel, taste

• Name of the person when their name is printed elsewhere on the document

• Personal pronouns

• Prepositions (use them sparingly): over, under, in, during, within, etc.

Specificity

Specific bullet statements contain detailed facts. To write them, you’ll need to be familiar with

the people and systems involved. Resist the urge to estimate or generalize. Don’t be satisfied

with a range (10-20 units), or round numbers (approximately $1000; nearly 3500 customers).

Get the exact numbers and use them. With the first round of drafting complete your bullets are

ready to be polished.

Polishing Accomplishment-Impact Bullet Statements

ABS stands not only for accuracy, brevity and specificity, but also for the critical “attributes of

bullet statements.” After the first draft bullets are complete, keep ABS in mind as you prepare to

polish your draft statements to clean them up, trim them down and give them the scrubbing they

need before they become a permanent part of someone’s official record. Consider the following

bullet: how could it be sculpted to support both the accomplishment and the impact?

- Repaired 17 seriously corroded broken or missing Log Periodic (LP) antenna

elements in the Atlantic Gateway Antenna System within 3 days by using elements

from decommissioned antenna parts saving an estimated $3500 in procurement cost

and 4 weeks of expected delivery time

Accuracy

To make the bullet statement accurate you need to ensure the facts are correct. Verify the facts

by simply asking a few questions. For this example, a few questions revealed a more detailed

picture of the actual accomplishment.

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• How many antenna elements were actually repaired? How many were replaced? In this

example, 17 elements were salvaged from decommissioned equipment and repaired to

replace the seriously damaged and corroded elements; an additional 23 elements were

repaired (sanded, repainted or recovered).

• How long does delivery really take and why? Four weeks of delivery time seems like a

long time; why does it take so long to receive antenna parts? The antenna elements come

from only one vendor and the estimated delivery time is based on the relatively low

priority of the work order.

Specificity

The content for this example has a close relationship between accuracy and specificity. Details

about your work may be likewise connected. The point is that sculpting your ABS does not

require them to be done in A-B-S order. Here, we consider the specificity and will close with

brevity. In order to make the facts in the bullet statement as specific as possible, follow the same

question and answer method used to guarantee accuracy.

• Exactly how many antennas were fixed? A total of 40 antenna elements were repaired or

replaced from all six LP antennas in the system.

• How much cost was actually saved? The exact cost charged to the unit for purchasing the

17 replacement antenna elements would have been $3479.

• How would the cost savings be spent? The $3500 cost savings estimate is based on

various antenna elements from an AN/GRA-4(V)4 Log Periodic antenna system that do

not need to be purchased due to the repair of elements from decommissioned antennas.

• What is the Atlantic Gateway Antenna System? The Atlantic Gateway Antenna System

connects Air Force and other DoD users from the eastern seaboard of the US to military

personnel in Western Europe.

• How has the repair of the antennas improved service to their customers? Transmit and

receive signal strength was improved; static and cross-talk was reduced.

Revised bullet: With the information gathered we can edit the bullet for accuracy and

specificity. While not every item of information could be added, the items that are included

(shown in BOLD, below) contribute significantly to the message being sent.

- Restored 40 seriously corroded, broken, or missing elements on 6 AN/GRA-4 Log

Periodic Antenna Systems in the Atlantic Gateway Antenna System within 3 days

by using elements from decommissioned antenna parts

-- Saved an estimated $3.4K in procurement cost and four weeks of expected

delivery time

-- Sharply improved clarity of voice signal for operators in US and Europe

The added information enabled us to build an additional impact element and sharpen the details

of the draft bullet. The bullet has also grown in length: now we need to sculpt for brevity.

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Brevity

Recall that editing for brevity includes editing for shorter words and the reduction of unnecessary

words. Keeping these dual tasks separate may be difficult, so do both at the same time! Changes

made to improve one aspect often promote the other. The three sections that follow track the

changes before, during and after editing for brevity: bold or underlined items are added; lined

through items are deleted.

Before Editing for Brevity

- Restored 40 seriously corroded, broken, or missing elements on 6 AN/GRA-4 Log

Periodic Antenna Systems in the Atlantic Gateway Antenna System within 3 days

by using elements from decommissioned antenna parts

-- Saved an estimated $3.4K in procurement cost and four weeks of expected

delivery time

-- Sharply improved clarity of voice signal for operators in US and Europe

Editing for Brevity

- Restored 40 seriously corroded, broken, or missing damaged elements on 6 six

AN/GRA-4 Log Periodic Antennas Systems in the Atlantic Gateway Antenna

System within 3 days by using elements from decommissioned antenna parts

-- Saved an estimated $3.4K in procurement cost and 4weeks of expected delivery

time

-- Sharply improved voice clarity of voice signal for Atlantic Gateway Antenna

System operators in US and Europe

After Editing for Brevity

- Restored 40 damaged elements on six AN/GRA-4 Log Periodic Antennas in 3 days

using decommissioned antenna parts

-- Saved $3.4K and4 weeks of expected delivery time

-- Sharply improved voice clarity for Atlantic Gateway Antenna System operators in

US and Europe

You’ve just successfully completed the process of drafting, streamlining and polishing effective

accomplishment-impact bullet statements. While the system in the example is dated, the process

for drafting, streamlining and polishing bullets is timeless and applies to the accomplishments of

all who serve in the Air Force today and tomorrow. With a little more practice, you can Extract

the Facts, Build the Structure and Streamline the Final Product with ease. Writing convincing

and truthful accomplishment-impact bullets will become almost second nature to you.

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Bullet Statement Mechanics

Chapter 16 presented the initial discussion on bullet statement mechanics for the preparation of

point papers, talking papers and bullet background papers. The bullets for most evaluations,

appraisals, awards and decorations are built in the same way as discussed in chapter 16, but

check for specific guidance for the form used by the evaluation, appraisal, award or decoration

you are preparing. The guidance that follows reinforces the bullet statement drafting, polishing

and formatting of previous discussions with the focus on evaluations, appraisals, awards and

decorations. The following outline presents bullet statement mechanics as bullets to give you

both written and visual guidance.

Bullet/text format and alignment

- Start main bullets with a single dash ( - )

-- This is a secondary level bullet and it uses two dashes ( -- )

-- Text within a bullet wraps so that the first character of the second and any subsequent lines

aligns directly under the first character, not the dash, of the line above

- Indent subordinate bullets so that the first dash of the subordinate bullet aligns directly under

the first character, not the dash, of the parent bullet one level above

-- This secondary bullet is subordinate to the “indent subordinate bullets” bullet

--- This is a tertiary bullet and it uses three dashes ( --- )

--- This tertiary bullet is subordinate to “This secondary bullet” above

-- If bullets are divided, there must be at least two subordinate bullets

--- The cardinal rule of outlining (chapter 6) states that any topic (or bullet) that is divided

must have at least two parts

--- Though often violated, the cardinal rule applies to bullets

Punctuation

- Use internal punctuation as required for accomplishment-impact bullet statements

- Never use ending punctuation in accomplishment-impact bullet statements

Grammar

- Always start an accomplishment-impact bullet with action (action verb or modified verb)

- Never start an accomplishment-impact bullet with a proper noun or pronoun

- Minimize the use of the individual’s name in bullets when it is elsewhere on the document

- Avoid using personal pronouns (he, she, his, her, etc.) in accomplishment-impact bullet

statements; these devices typically serve to form complete sentences

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CHAPTER 20:

The Official Biography

This chapter covers:

• The Official Biography: Fundamentals

• Getting Started

• Associated Press (AP) Guidance for Official Biographies

• Official Biography Elements

No matter your status (officer, enlisted or civilian) or how long you have served, you have

accomplished many things to get you to your current duty location. Capturing and maintaining

your accomplishments in a standard biography format is a powerful tool for making personal and

professional connections—just as powerful as any modern social media application—and it can

help build cohesion at the unit level. When unit members read the biographies of their leaders,

they see more than an official Air Force photograph and a list of facts—they see the service that

shaped their leaders and the excellence they obtained.

The Official Biography: Fundamentals

Did you know the Air Force maintains the official biographies for all Air Force senior leaders,

past and present, for use by anyone with access to the Internet? This fact alone challenges us all

in at least two ways. First, all official Air Force biographies should have the same corporate Air

Force look—the public expects the military to be standardized. Second, the need to disclose

personal accomplishments and facts must be balanced with the need to protect private and

sensitive information. The guidance of this chapter compiles information provided by the

experts in the Air Force Production (AFPRO) office at the Defense Media Activity (DMA) who

publish the official biographies for Air Force senior leaders. The guidance here follows the same

protocols used by AFPRO to help all Air Force personnel create a biography with the same

corporate Air Force look while also protecting personal or sensitive information.

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Getting Started

The official biography is unique among all the written products discussed in The Tongue and

Quill—the official biography is a public affairs communication tool similar to a news release.

As such, it follows the style guidance for a news release developed by the Associated Press (AP)

and adopted by the Air Force (see below). The official biography has multiple sections—some

are required while a few are optional. For some, the requirement depends on your status (officer,

enlisted or civilian), flight rating, and joint experience. Special considerations are annotated

where applicable. In addition, the following general guidance applies:

• Format: use [Arial font, size 9] for all text and entries; bold the headings (e.g., EDUCATION);

use [Arial font, size 13.5 BOLD] for the identification line; all line spacing is 1.15.

• Length: Final drafts should be no more than two pages in length when printed.

• Use a single space after a period or punctuation mark in the narrative.

NOTE: The official biographies available on the Air Force Portal may be different from the

standards presented in this chapter—customs and standards have changed over time. Check

with your chain of command for command-specific guidance in preparing an official biography.

Associated Press (AP) Style Guidance for Official Biographies

• Acronyms: Spell out acronyms on first use; minimize the use of military jargon.

• Adjectives: For brevity, minimize the use of adjectives (e.g., “successfully led…”).

• Months and Dates:

o Jan., Feb., Aug., Sept., Oct., Nov., and Dec. are abbreviated when used with a day

(e.g.Jan.1, 2015), and spelled out when used only with year (e.g. January 2015)

o March, April, May, June, and July are always spelled out.

o Use commas to separate the day from the year in the “Month Day, Year” format

(March 3, 2014) but not when the day is omitted (March 2014).

o If frocked, say only “Frocked” and do not include a date of promotion.

• Rank: Follows Air Force journalistic style.

o Spelled out fully in the identification line using all capital letters.

o Abbreviated rank is used in the narrative with the name of the member.

o Generic rank (e.g., “the colonel” or “the general”) is used when the name is omitted.

• State names

o All states are spelled out completely when they stand alone without a city.

o Alaska, Hawaii, Idaho, Iowa, Maine, Ohio, Texas, and Utah are always spelled out.

o Ala., Ariz., Ark., Calif., Colo., Conn., Del., Fla., Ga., Ill., Ind., Kan., Ky., La., Md.,

Mass., Mich., Minn., Miss., Mo., Mont., Neb., Nev., N.H., N.J., N.M., N.Y., N.C.,

N.D., Okla., Ore., Pa., R.I., S.C., S.D., Tenn., Vt., Va., Wash., W.Va., Wis., and Wyo.

may be abbreviated when used with a city.

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Official Biography Elements

The guidance below is presented to help all Air Force personnel draft their own biography using

the standards for an official biography used by the AFPRO. All personnel must balance the need

for disclosure with the need to protect personal or sensitive information in preparing a biography.

• The preparation of an official biography is covered by the Privacy Act; however, the

finished product is public domain and must be in agreement with official records.

• Follow Public Affairs’ guidance for the disclosure of contingency operations

locations. In general, forward operating bases are not normally used on an official

biography while some main operating bases, such as Manas Air Base, Kyrgyzstan; Joint

Base Balad, Iraq; or Joint Base Bagram, Afghanistan, may be used. If in doubt, use a

general term (e.g., Southwest Asia) for the location of a contingency operation.

• Do not include the names of family members anywhere on the biography.

Identification Line (“FULL RANK FIRST M. LAST” or “FIRST M. LAST”)

• Officer and enlisted. Spell out the full rank and signature block name using bold font and

all capital letters (e.g., “FULL RANK FIRST M. LAST”).

• Civilian. Spell out the signature block name using bold font and all capital letters

(e.g., “FIRST M. LAST”). Rank is not used for civilian biographies.

Narrative

The narrative has both text and the official photograph. Officer and enlisted biographies

typically have only two or three paragraphs; civilian biographies may have up to five or six.

Spell out all office symbols, acronyms and organizational names; do not provide details that

compromise unit-level operational security (e.g., numbers of people, aircraft or equipment).

• First paragraph.

o Officer and enlisted. Begins with the abbreviated rank and full name followed by

position title (from official records), organization, base and location. Next, provide a

brief description of the member’s responsibilities in this position.

o Civilian. Begins with the full name followed by position title (from official records),

organization, base and location. Next, provide a brief description of the member’s

responsibilities in this position. Civilian rank is not used on the official biography.

• Official photograph. The official photograph is placed in the upper right corner of the

biography, below the banner, aligned with the top of the first paragraph, and flush with

the right margin. The source photograph file should be of high resolution in a standard

8” x 10” or 5” x 7” format. Resize the source file to roughly 3.2” wide x 4” high using a

locked aspect ratio and cropping, as required (~ 40% of an 8” x 10” original).

• Second paragraph.

o Officer and enlisted. Briefly describe the member’s career: when the member

entered the Air Force (enlisted: month and year of enlistment followed by technical

training course attended and the month/year of graduation from technical training;

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officer: college attended and commissioning source), years of service (active

/guard/reserve), experience (technical/leadership), assignment locations

(states/countries) and a summary of the most significant assignments (not a “laundry

list” of assignments). The final sentence of the narrative, as part of this paragraph or

the third paragraph, reads, “Prior to his/her current position, the (rank) was the

(position title, organization, base, and location).”

o Civilian. Briefly describe the member’s previous significant assignments (e.g., “Prior

to his current position, Mrs. Smith was the position title, organization, base, and

location”). The organization, base and location may be omitted for where the

position title inherently describes the organization, base and location (e.g., “Deputy

Undersecretary of Defense for Acquisition, Technology, and Logistics” is clearly a

Pentagon assignment working for the Secretary of Defense). Follow this with a brief

description of the member’s responsibilities in the position(s) listed.

• Third paragraph.

o Officer and Enlisted [Optional]. Provide information on the member’s other

noteworthy assignments, contingency operations experience, deployments and flight

information, as applicable. For guard and reserve personnel, this paragraph may

include information on the member’s civilian profession; however, do not use the

names of companies—be generic (e.g., “In her civilian capacity, the general is a pilot

with a major airline”). If not included in the second paragraph, the third paragraph

may simply be “Prior to his/her current position, the (rank) was the (position title,

organization, base and location).”

o Civilian. Provide information on the member’s significant professional experience

prior to entering public service (e.g., “Before entering public service, Mrs. Smith was

the Chief Executive Officer for company name, an industry-leading technology firm

specializing in cyber security for advanced logistics systems”). Company names may

be used since they are integral to the credentials of civilians.

• Fourth paragraph [Civilian only].

o Describe the member’s earlier experience, both public and private, prior to the

position(s) described in the third paragraph. May include military service and a

summary of publications, as applicable.

o Fifth and sixth paragraphs may be added to provide logical breaks in the narrative

while tracing the member’s significant and relevant experience to the member’s entry

into the workforce following the completion of formal education. Frequently, the

narrative concludes with a statement of the college(s) attended and degree(s) earned.

“EDUCATION”

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading. List

completed education programs chronologically (first to most recent) by year, type of degree, title

of degree/program, institution, city, and state. Include all academic degrees and all professional

military education (PME), professional developmental education (PDE), professional continuing

education (PCE), and executive courses. For academic programs that merge the type and title of

the degree (e.g., “Master of Business Administration” or “Master of Military Operational Art and

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Science”), use the merged type and title for the entry. When the institution name includes the

state (e.g., “University of Iowa”), do not include the state at the end of the entry. For non-degree

PME, PDE, PCE, and executive courses, list only the year, course, school, location and state.

For PME only, add “by correspondence”, if appropriate, as shown below.

2002 Bachelor of Science, Aeronautical Engineering, Auburn University, Auburn, Ala.

2003 Air and Space Basic Course, Maxwell Air Force Base, Ala.

[“Air Force Base” is spelled out on first use.]

2006 Master of Science, Logistics Management, Air Force Institute of Technology, Wright-

Patterson AFB, Ohio

2007 Squadron Officer School, Maxwell AFB, Ala., by correspondence

2008 Squadron Officer School, Maxwell AFB, Ala.

2012 Air Command and Staff College, Maxwell AFB, Ala., by correspondence

2013 Master of Military Operational Art and Science, Air Command and Staff College,

Maxwell AFB, Ala.

2017 Air War College, Maxwell AFB, Ala., by correspondence

2020 Doctor of Philosophy, Military History, University of Alabama, Tuscaloosa

Work History (“ASSIGNMENTS” or “CAREER CHRONOLOGY”)

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading. List the

member’s work history chronologically by month and year entered to month and year departed.

Follow Public Affairs’ guidance for disclosure of contingency operations locations.

• Officer and enlisted personnel use “

ASSIGNMENTS” as the heading.

o Include the official duty title, unit, base and state. (The squadron of assignment is not

always necessary, such as while in student status or when the duty title and base

sufficiently identify the assignment. If in doubt, include the squadron.)

o Spell out Air Base (AB), Air Force Base (AFB) and Joint Base (JB) on first use.

o Do not use a period at the end of an assignment entry unless needed to abbreviate a

state (or Washington, D.C.).

o Spell out the names of all months (do not follow the AP abbreviation guidance for the

names of months in this section).

o Capitalize all duty titles (as of October 2011 for all new official biographies).

o Deployment/contingency experience is placed in parentheses in the same line as the

assignment during which the member deployed.

• Civilian personnel use “

CAREER CHRONOLOGY” as the heading. If previous military

service is listed, include the year you left the service and the reason (e.g., retired, service

in the Reserve or Guard, or civilian employment).

o Include the official position title and the organization/company name.

o Spell out Air Base (AB), Air Force Base (AFB) and Joint Base (JB) on first use.

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o Do not use a period at the end of an assignment entry unless needed to abbreviate a

state (or Washington, D.C.) or as part of a company name (e.g., “Inc.”).

o Spell out the names of all months (do not follow the AP abbreviation guidance for the

names of months in this section).

o Capitalize all duty titles (as of October 2011 for all new official biographies).

o Deployment/contingency experience is placed in parentheses in the same line as the

position during which the member deployed.

• Assignment entry format and examples

1. Month Year–Month Year, Duty Title, Unit, Installation, State

2. March 2005–February 2008, Duty Title, Unit, Randolph AFB, Texas

3. February 2008–July 2010, Duty Title, Unit, Maxwell AFB, Ala. (August 2008–

January 2009, Duty Title, Unit, Balad Air Base, Iraq)

4. July 2010–June 2011, Student, Air Command and Staff College, Maxwell AFB, Ala.

“

SUMMARY OF JOINT ASSIGNMENTS” [Officer only]

This section applies to officer personnel only; delete entire section if no joint assignments.

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading. The

format is the same as for “

ASSIGNMENTS” with the addition of rank at the end of each entry. List

all joint assignments chronologically (first to most recent) by month and year entered to month

and year departed. Include the official duty title, unit, base and state. Follow Public Affairs’

guidance for disclosure of contingency operations locations.

• Do not use a period at the end of an assignment entry unless needed to abbreviate a state

(or Washington, D.C.).

• Each entry ends with a statement of the rank held for the joint assignment

(e.g., “…, as a colonel”).

• Example joint assignment entries

1. June 2006–June 2008, Assistant Deputy Directorate for Special Operations,

Operations Directorate, the Joint Staff, Washington D.C., as a colonel

2. May 2008–May 2010, Commander, Combined Joint Special Operations Air

Component, Joint Base Balad, Iraq, as a brigadier general

3. August 2012–September 2014, Director, Command, Control, Communications and

Cyber (J6), US Pacific Command, Camp H. M. Smith, Hawaii, as a major general

“FLIGHT INFORMATION” [Officer and enlisted flight rated only]

This section applies to flight rated personnel only; delete entire section if not flight rated.

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading. List the

member’s rating, flight hours and aircraft flown. Use a colon with two spaces after the colon for

rating, flight hours and aircraft flown.

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• Rating: Level (none, senior, master, command) and type (pilot, navigator, air battle

manager, flight surgeon, flight nurse, astronaut, aircrew member).

• Flight hours: Total is approximate (e.g., “More than 2,100”) and may include combat

time (e.g., “including more than 60 combat hours”). Do not round up—the hours listed

should be slightly less than the actual hours.

• Aircraft flown: Listed chronologically with the most recent being listed last.

• Example flight information entries

Rating: command pilot

Flight hours: more than 2,900 (Use “more than” not “over”)

Aircraft flown: T-37, T-38, OV-10, B-52G, B-1B and B-2

“MAJOR AWARDS AND DECORATIONS”

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading.

Capitalize (Title Case) the names of all medals and ribbons listed. Accoutrements (devices) are

not capitalized (e.g., with bronze star, with two oak leaf clusters, with “V” device). Never use

“one” for a single award.

• Officer and enlisted. List the member’s major military awards and decorations in

descending order of precedence (highest to lowest). It is customary for officers and

senior enlisted members to list only Achievement Medals and higher honors. Lower

precedent honors are listed only if significant (e.g., Prisoner of War Medal, Outstanding

Airman of the Year Ribbon).

• Civilian. List the member’s major civilian awards of state, regional or national interest in

descending order of precedence (highest to lowest). Former military members should list

their major military awards and decorations first, then list civilian awards. If military

awards are listed, it is customary for officers and senior enlisted members to show only

Achievement Medals and higher honors. Lower precedent honors are listed only if

significant (e.g., Prisoner of War Medal, Outstanding Airman of the Year Ribbon).

• Example major awards and decorations entries

Distinguished Service Medal

Defense Superior Service Medal with two bronze stars

Legion of Merit with oak leaf cluster

Distinguished Flying Cross

Meritorious Service Medal with four oak leaf clusters

Air Medal with nine oak leaf clusters

Air Force Commendation Medal with oak leaf cluster

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“OTHER ACHIEVEMENTS” [Optional for all]

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading. List

significant other achievements chronologically (first to most recent) by year, followed by a

space, and the title or brief description of the achievement.

“PUBLICATIONS” [Optional for all]

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading. List the

publications chronologically (first to most recent) by title and publication data.

“PROFESSIONAL MEMBERSHIPS AND ASSOCIATIONS” [Optional for all]

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading. List

current and relevant professional memberships and associations by name only.

“EFFECTIVE DATES OF PROMOTION” [Military only]

Use bold font and all capital letters for the heading; do not use a colon after the heading. List the

rank and effective date of promotion using the full rank, month, day and year in AP style.

• Officer. List all ranks from commissioning to the current rank held, such as follows:

Second Lieutenant June 1, 2000

First Lieutenant June 1, 2002

Captain June 2, 2004

• Enlisted. List all ranks from enlistment to the current rank held as shown below.

Airman Basic Sept. 28, 2003

Airman March 28, 2004

Airman First Class Jan. 28, 2005

Senior Airman Sept. 28, 2006

Staff Sergeant July 1, 2008

Technical Sergeant July 1, 2011

NOTE: The custom for the official biography for the Chief Master Sergeant of the Air

Force is to list only the promotion to Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force with the

heading changed to the singular form (“EFFECTIVE DATE OF PROMOTION”).

• Civilian. Rank is not used on civilian biographies; civilians do not use this section.

“ (Current as of Month Year) ”

The current as of date (month and year) are written in sentence case and enclosed in parentheses

one blank line below the effective dates of promotion section. An example current as of date is

as follows: (Current as of August 2014)

CHAPTER 21

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CHAPTER 21:

The Résumé

This chapter covers:

• Function and Organization

• Seven Steps to an Effective Résumé

• Things to Include

• Things to Omit

• The Résumé Cover Letter

• Examples

An up-to-date biography is an invaluable tool to help you build a résumé. Although the résumé

is not an official Air Force document, it is discussed here to help you when you begin your

transition to the private sector work force.

The résumé serves at least two functions: the individual components of the résumé convey

important information about your knowledge, skills and abilities to perform the job while the

résumé as a whole presents a picture of you and your experience to create a positive first

impression. With a good first impression, you can rise above the competition and get to the

interview stage where you will need to employ all the skills of effective speaking discussed

earlier in this volume. The challenge is to produce a résumé that gets noticed.

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Getting noticed is even more difficult today with the advent résumé search engines, online

résumé sites, and software applications that make job applications easier to complete. While

these advances make applying for a job easier they also increase the size of the applicant pool.

However, with a good résumé at the ready you can master just about any online job application

or résumé-building software. One advantage of the résumé-building software used by the Office

of Personnel Management (OPM) website is the format standardization of all résumés—you

cannot set the format and neither can anyone else—so make your résumé shine by building your

résumé to accomplish a specific function and organizing your content to achieve that function.

With a few simple steps you can create focus within the résumé and clearly link your knowledge,

skills, abilities and experience to the qualities the employer is seeking.

Function and Organization

The old expression “form follows function” is especially true with résumés. Organize your

résumé for the function it serves. For example, are you using the résumé as a “feeler” to look for

opportunities with multiple companies simultaneously; a response to a particular announcement;

or a specific request from a person or company? Once you know the function, organize your

résumé to accomplish that function and use the key terms used by the employer to get noticed.

1. The chronological résumé is an outline of your work experience and periods of

employment (in reverse chronological order—most recent information first) that shows

steady employment. Titles and organizations are emphasized as are duties and

accomplishments. This format is used most often by those with steady employment

and/or who want to remain in a current career field. It’s also excellent for those who

have shown advancement within a specific career field. Detail the most recent 10-year

period and summarize earlier experience that is relevant to the position you are seeking.

2. The functional résumé emphasizes your qualifications (skills, knowledge, abilities and

achievements) as opposed to specific dates and places of employment, and allows you to

group them into functional areas such as training, sales, procurement and accounting.

List the functional areas in the order of importance as related to the job objective and

stress your accomplishments within these functional areas. This format is used most

often by people who are reentering the work force or those seeking a career change.

3. The combination résumé combines the best of the chronological and functional résumés

because you can group relevant skills and abilities into functional areas and then provide

your work history, dates and places of employment, and education. This format allows

you to cover a wider variety of subjects and qualifications, thereby showing skills that are

transferable from one career to another. It works well for those “special” assignment

requirements, for military retirees (those who have frequently switched career fields), and

is ideal for people whose career paths have been somewhat erratic.

4. The targeted résumé focuses on your skills, knowledge, abilities, achievements,

experience and education that relate to a specific position. It features a series of bullet

statements regarding your capabilities and achievements related to the targeted job.

Experience is listed to support statements and education is listed after achievements.

This format is probably the easiest to write, but keep in mind it must be re-accomplished

(“targeted”) for each position you are seeking.

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5. The federal résumé is most commonly built by the OPM website for federal government

jobs. This résumé is commonly five pages by the time all your information is included so

it does not follow the “keep it to two pages max” rule. Once you submit your résumé,

there may be further forms to complete. When in doubt as to what to include, read the

job announcement carefully. If you still have questions, call the point of contact on the

job announcement. The OPM website allows users to register and then create and store

several résumés within the user’s account. When applying for a specific job, users can

then attach the most applicable stored résumé or build a new one to target a specific job.

6. The military résumé is used to apply for highly selective military assignments, such as

an aide or member of an executive staff. The military résumé summarizes your

qualifications for the position that may not be apparent in your biography or duty titles.

Use the format that best showcases your abilities and include the following information:

a. Security clearance and date of investigation. This is critical for some jobs; in some

cases, you’ll need a higher level clearance just to get in the building!

b. Date of rank. This helps potential supervisors know how your seniority relates to the

incumbents in the office … and helps them know when you’ll be up for promotion.

c. Professional Military Education. Make sure you identify any schools completed

while in residence and any distinguished graduate (DG) recognition.

d. Service Status. Regular Air Force, Air Force Reserve, or National Guard.

e. Availability. When will you be available for reassignment?

f. Special Qualifications. Identify special qualifications such as foreign language skills,

Acquisition Professional Development Program (APDP), or Joint Officer credentials.

g. Flying Data. Even if the position is not a flying billet, rated officers may want to

include flying data.

Seven Steps to an Effective Résumé

The seven steps to effective communication (chapters 2-9) provide an excellent checklist for

building an effective résumé. When writing your résumé, remember, the best qualified person

doesn’t always get the job—sometimes it’s the person with the most effective résumé.

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience. Your purpose is to get hired—which usually occurs

after a successful interview—which requires you to get noticed first—which requires you

to know a good deal about the job, the company and the employer and have that

knowledge reflected in your résumé. Begin by asking yourself questions that need to be

answered and then move to step 2.

2. Conduct the Research. Know yourself: your needs and wants (type and level of the

position), what you can offer and what you can do for them. Now take time to list your

skills and accomplishments. And research the prospective company to learn about the

job as well as to “speak their language.”

3. Support Your Ideas. Your “ideas” in this context are your qualifications for the job.

Likewise, the “support” for your qualifications is your knowledge, skills, abilities,

experience and education that support those qualifications.

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4. Get Organized. Gather your documents: job descriptions, certificates, licenses and

academic transcripts. If you worked for the Department of Defense, “civilianize” those

job titles and descriptions to those used in the private sector … consult the Dictionary of

Occupational Titles, published by the US Department of Labor. Learning the company’s

terminology could mean the difference between a 20-second scan and an interview.

5. Draft. Type your draft and prepare to edit.

6. Edit. Read your draft and edit: edit for typos, extraneous information, action words,

plain language (businesses typically write on an 8th grade level), neatness, accuracy and

consistency in format. It must be long enough to cover relevant information but brief

enough not to bore a potential employer (two pages max). Use only key phrases and

words appropriate to the job you’re seeking. To help you develop your accomplishment

statements, review the advice on writing accomplishment-impact bullet statements.

7. Fight for Feedback. Have someone you trust read the résumé and suggest changes and

recommendations. Are all the t’s crossed and i’s dotted? Does it look professional?

Visually appealing? Is it easy to read with the strongest points quickly apparent? Is there

good use of spacing, margins, indentions, capitalization and underlining?

Things to Include

As a minimum, definitely include the following on all résumés:

• Name, mailing address, e-mail address and telephone number (with area code) centered at

the top of the first page. [Balance your privacy with the need for potential employers to

reach you easily; limit contact data to what you feel comfortable with providing.]

• Job objective and/or summary statement.

• Qualifications and work experience relevant to the job you are seeking.

• Education and training (military courses or other conferences, workshops, seminars and

continuing education classes) emphasizing those relevant to the position you’re seeking.

The following items may be included on your résumé if pertinent to the position you are seeking.

• Leadership activities

• Special skills or capabilities

• Professional experience and memberships

• Credentials, licenses

• Career accomplishments

• Languages studied

• Honors and awards

• Military service

• Papers, presentations, published works

• Security clearance

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Things to Omit

Omit the following types of information unless they are specifically requested by the employer.

• Personal data (age, marital status,

number and ages of children)

• Reason for leaving a job and names of

bosses

• Photograph

• References

• Salary history or requirement

• Hobbies or personal interests

• Religious affiliation

• Months, days—use “years” only

• Specific security information

• Irrelevant information

The Résumé Cover Letter

A cover letter is a personal communication written to a specific person in an organization. The

cover letter speaks for you to garner the interest of the employer—write the cover letter so that

the employer will want to read your résumé and offer you an interview.

• Format: Use white or off-white 8½ x 11-inch high-quality paper following the format for

a personal letter (chapter 15). Do not use Air Force letterhead.

• Address the letter, if possible, to a specific person such as the hiring official, work center

manager or human resources executive. If addressing the letter to an official position

without the name, use gender-neutral terms in the salutation (e.g., “Dear Manager”).

• Use a positive tone that is genuine and natural to stress how your association with the

firm will benefit you both.

• Use action verbs, personal pronouns, life, conviction, humor, assurance and confidence to

sell them on hiring you. Delete irrelevant and negative information.

• Limit the letter to one page; limit the body to two or three paragraphs.

o First sentence: Grab the reader’s attention and use the name of a mutual contact.

o Highlight your relevant experience, skills and accomplishments that make you unique

for the job and entices the reader to call you. Consider using bullets to create eye

appeal and place the most relevant information first/at the top.

o Close with a bid for a brief meeting (don’t use interview) and write as though you

expect it to occur. Indicate you will follow up with a call to arrange a time.

• Make it professional—edit, edit, edit—then keep the file to draft future cover letters.

Examples

The following pages display an example cover letter and several example résumés with complete

contact data to get you started. You should limit the contact data to what you feel comfortable

with providing. Also, many bases host résumé-building classes; find out what services are

available at your base to help you build a content rich and professional résumé that make your

knowledge, skills and abilities rise above the rest to get you noticed and hired!

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Résumé Cover Letter

July 7, 2014

Mary M. Middleton

PO Box 8765

Seattle WA 54321-1234

Ms. Rena Mitchell

Government Contracts Advisor

Bowe and Burke International Corporation

1472 South 303d Street

Seattle WA 54300-1472

Dear Ms. Mitchell

I recently read about Bowe and Burke in the newspaper and spoke with Nancy Herron.

She mentioned you need a project manager/team leader—I am interested in this position and

believe you will find these particular aspects of my background relevant to this position:

• As project manager for a statewide fund-raising campaign, I recruited and supervised

personnel, administered the budget, and led the development of promotional materials.

• As manager of 300 volunteers for an organization, I handled diverse management

functions—scheduled work, evaluated personnel, organized supply and equipment

resources, and controlled cash receipts and other assets.

• I have extensive knowledge of the computer software used by your company and have

developed personnel and accounting macro-functions to expedite management actions.

• My bachelor’s degree in business administration includes course work in personnel

administration and accounting.

I will telephone you on Wednesday, July 16, to arrange for a meeting where I can learn

more about your requirements and tell you more about my background as it relates to you.

Thank you for your consideration and I look forward to being in touch.

Sincerely

MARY M. MIDDLETON

Attachment:

Résumé

Mary M. Middleton

CHAPTER 21

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Chronological Résumé

KAREN CALLOWAY

123 Center Street

Middletown IA 54321-1234

(515) 333-9999 (Home)

(515) 555-7777 (Cell)

[email protected]

JOB OBJECTIVE Challenging writer-editor position.

EXPERIENCE

Writer-Editor, Middletown College, Middletown, Iowa, 2008-Present. Researched and

wrote curriculum materials for … Edited curriculum materials written by … Ensured

accuracy of facts and figures for … Researched, designed, wrote, and typeset a 55-page

administrative handbook … Developed and distributed a 21-page textbook preparation

guide for … Supervised three …

Editorial Assistant, The Middletown Journal, Middletown, Iowa, 1998-2008. Typed,

edited, and proofread all articles prepared by reporters and staffers for the weekly

newspaper. Produced … Recommended … Prepared …

EDUCATION

MA, Adult Education, Middleton College, Middletown IA, 2006

BS, English, Middleton College, Middletown IA, 1998

PROFESSIONAL MEMBERSHIPS

American Writers Guild

Association of Professional Editors

AWARDS

Outstanding Contributor, Middletown College English Faculty, 2009

Best Book Award, American Council of Teachers of English, 2006

PERSONAL INTERESTS

Free-lance writing

Photography

Publishing

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Functional Résumé

CHARLES CATO

1234 High Street

Millbrook AL 36054-0001

(205) 333-4444 (Home)

(205) 555-4400 (Cell)

[email protected]

JOB OBJECTIVE

Information systems resource manager specializing in microcomputers

with emphasis on training and development.

QUALIFICATIONS

Resource Management: Managed $300 million inventory of hardware

and software resources for 13 individual computer systems, 5 aircraft

simulators, and 40 microcomputers. Reorganized … Identified …,

formulated new policies, updated … and revised … Researched and

developed … Planned and supervised … Reduced computer supply

acquisition costs by $150K through …

Systems Analysis: Coordinated weekly … Organized, developed, and

supervised the … Designed training … and developed self-study course

… implemented data base … that resulted in …

Quality Control: Developed, coordinated, and managed … Assessed

contractor … Provided technical analysis of …

Programming: Developed and maintained …

EDUCATION

MA in Business Administration with emphasis in Information Systems,

University of Alabama, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, 2007 (GPA 3.82)

BS, Mathematics and Computer Science, Tulane University, New

Orleans, Louisiana, 2006 (GPA 3.1)

CHAPTER 21

The Résumé

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Combination (Chronological and Functional) Résumé

FELICIA VINSON

321 Jefferson Ave

Vienna VA 54321-1234

(703) 555-1234 (Home)

(703) 544-7890 (Cell)

[email protected]

OBJECTIVE

A career using financial and retail organization skills that offers growth

through further education with increasing responsibility.

SUMMARY

Experienced in financial and retail organizations emphasizing office

administration, accounting, and supervisory skills.

QUALIFICATIONS

Accounting and Finance. Performed accounting and administrative

procedures for large banking institution and retail sales organization.

Completed … Balanced … Recorded bank … Calculated daily …

resulting in reduction of … and savings of …

Management and Administration. Administered … Operated computer

to verify … Researched monthly … Supervised 3 to 6 employees …

Managed retail stores with merchandise worth $300,000, reducing … and

saving …

EXPERIENCE

1992-1997

Manager, Boomers Stores, Washington DC

1991-1992

Assistant Manager, Sun Savings, Wheaton MD

1990-1991

Accountant, Midway Bank, Midway MD

1987-1990

Assistant Contracting Officer, USAF

1980-1990

USAF

EDUCATION

BS, Business Administration, University of Pennsylvania, 1992

Senior Management Course, University of Northern Virginia, 1993

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Targeted Résumé

KEVIN JONES

6953 Oakside Drive

Harris GA 30814-7606

(706) 277-9999 (Home)

(706) 285-8888 (Cell)

kjones@peachtree.com

JOB OBJECTIVE

Senior credit analyst in an engineering department with potential for

advancement within the corporation.

CAPABILITIES

- Analyzed credit data to …

- Prepared reports of …

- Studied, researched, reported …

- Evaluated … and prepared reports …

- Consulted with … on …

ACHIEVEMENTS

- Responsible for …

- Supervised a staff of … responsible for $2 million inventory of …

- Maintained …

- Acted as …

- Saved … work hours and … dollars …

EXPERIENCE

2007-present

Senior Credit Analyst, Georgia South Corporation, Macon, Georgia

2001-2007

Credit and Collection Manager, General Electric, Clinton, New Jersey

1998-2001

Claims Examiner, Great Western, Billings, New Jersey

EDUCATION

MBA in Finance, Pace University, Monroe, Connecticut, 2002

BS in Accounting, Northeast College, Penham, Massachusetts, 1998

(Honors graduate)

CHAPTER 22

Envelopes and Mail

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CHAPTER 22:

Envelopes and Mail

This chapter covers:

• Envelope Fundamentals

• Envelope Anatomy

• Address Format Standards

• USPS Mail Terminology

We send and receive mail every day with little thought about the technical requirements for

addressing the mail. United States Postal Service (USPS) Publication 28, Postal Addressing

Standards, provides a wealth of information (210 pages) to standardize the address elements of

mail items to optimize automated mail handling and decrease the time it takes for an item to

arrive at its destination. There are many addressing standards that are beyond the scope of this

handbook; however, The Tongue and Quill team has extracted essential elements of USPS

Publication 28 for ready reference and standardization within the Air Force.

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Envelope Fundamentals

Use an envelope appropriate for the size and type of correspondence when prepared for dispatch.

The envelope should be rectangular and the correspondence should fit easily, but not too loose,

so use an envelope that is only slightly larger than the dispatch-ready correspondence. When

choosing an envelope size, be aware that very small and very large envelopes are difficult to

process: Normally, use envelopes at least 3.5 by 5 inches and no larger than 6.125 x 11.5 inches.

In addition to the size of the envelope, consider the following when selecting an envelope:

• When using window envelopes, be sure that the MEMORANDUM FOR element is

visible through the envelope window.

• When several items are to be dispatched together, the largest item that cannot be folded

determines the envelope size.

• Do not use envelopes with clasps, staples, string buttons, or similar securing devices for

USPS mail—they will jam in the automated mail sorting equipment.

• Limit the thickness of any envelope to 1/4 inch or less when sealed—thicker envelopes

will jam the automated mail sorting equipment. Write “NON-MACHINEABLE” above

the address on any envelope if it is more than 1/4 inch thick.

Envelope Anatomy

The Post Office designates four areas on the face of an envelope for specific purposes. These

areas include the return address area; the postage area; the optical character reader (OCR) read

area; and the barcode clear area as shown in the diagram below.

USPS Publication 28, Annex 1, Section A1, Envelope Illustration

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Envelope Anatomy Details

• The return address area is in the upper left corner of the envelope. The return address is

aligned on the left approximately 1/8 inch from the left edge of the envelope and

approximately 1/8 inch down from the top of the envelope.

• The postage area is in the upper right corner of the envelope (ensure the correspondence

has sufficient postage, if required, before mailing).

• The OCR read area covers the majority of the center of the envelope. The OCR read area

is a rectangle with the base 5/8 inch from the bottom of the envelope and extending

upwards to 2 3/4 inches from the bottom with 1/2 inch margins from each side. The

entire address must be contained within the OCR read area.

• The barcode clear area is in the lower right corner. It extends from the lower right corner

of the envelope upwards 5/8 inch with a width of 4 3/4 inches.

The envelope should contain only the information needed in the areas reserved for each purpose

without printed or stamped markings of slogans or designs. This also applies to mailing labels,

post cards and self-mailers. An example envelope is provided in the diagram below.

Air Force Correspondence Envelope Illustration

AWC/DE

325 CHENNAULT CIRCLE

MAXWELL AFB AL 36112-6427

OFFICIAL BUSINESS

[Non-address data]

[Info/Attention] MR JAMES BROWN

[Recipient] AF/A1D

[Delivery Address] 1250 AIR FORCE PENTAGON

[Post Office, State, Zip] WASHINGTON DC 20330-1250

Address Format Standards

The USPS provides standards for the address format to make the addresses readable. This helps

the USPS identify the correct delivery address the first time that the mail piece is processed.

Follow the USPS guidance and additional information in the table on the next page to ensure

addresses on your envelopes are readable—by people and automated equipment.

[OCR read area]

Postage

Area

BARCODE CLEAR AREA

(4 3/4 x 5/8 inches)

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USPS Publication 28 Guidance

The Tongue and Quill

Additional Information

Addresses should be typewritten or machine

printed in dark ink on a light background using

uppercase letters.

Use all uppercase characters whether typed

or word-processor printed. Do not use bold,

italic, script, artistic or other unusual

typefaces. Hand-written addresses or rubber

stamps should not be used.

Except for the hyphen in the primary or

secondary street number (if needed) or the ZIP+4

Code, all punctuation may be omitted.

Use open punctuation style (omit

punctuation), when possible.

All lines of the address should be formatted with

a uniform left margin.

Set the left margin for all lines so that the

longest line is complete without an overrun

to a second line, if possible, and leaves a 1/2

inch margin to the right.

When using a foreign address, always place the

country name by itself on the last line.

Self-explanatory.

Address characters must not touch and should be

equally spaced.

Use Courier New, Times New Roman, or

simple sans serif font with point size of 12.

All lines of the address should be parallel to the

bottom of the envelope.

Self-explanatory.

Be sure to include all pertinent information such

as the directional code, apartment, floor and suite

number.

Include in the delivery address the street

designators (e.g., BLVD, DR); directional

designators (e.g., NE, SW); the apartment,

suite, or room number; and a ZIP+4 code.

The entire address should be contained in an

imaginary rectangle known as the OCR read area

that extends from 5/8 inch to 2 3/4 inch from the

bottom of the mail-piece, with 1/2 inch margins

on each side.

See USPS Publication 28 illustration, above.

The barcode clear area, 5/8 inch from the

bottom, and 4 3/4 inch from the right edge of the

mail piece, is the area where an Intelligent Mail

barcode is pre-applied or printed by an OCR.

See USPS Publication 28 illustration, above.

Extraneous (non-address) printing that appears in

the OCR read area should be positioned above

the delivery address line and as far away from

the address block as possible.

Self-explanatory.

The Return Address Area (The Sender’s Address)

Place the complete mailing address, without any names, in the upper left corner of the envelope.

Use uppercase letters with no punctuation except the hyphen in the zip code. Add “OFFICIAL

BUSINESS” at least two line spaces below the return address. Finally, do not use rubber stamps

for the return address area of the envelope.

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The OCR Read Area (The Recipient’s Address)

Overview: Use all uppercase letters in Courier New font (12 points) or similar simple sans serif

font. Ensure the characters do not touch or overlap—use one or two spaces between words (be

consistent). The address is limited to five lines and all five lines must be within the OCR read

area: the first line is no higher than 2 3/4 inches from the bottom and the last line must be no

lower than 5/8 inch from the bottom. The address must also leave a margin of at least 1/2 inch

from each side of the envelope. The left margin is usually not an issue since the address lines are

normally blocked left near the middle of the envelope and run parallel to the long edge. Finally,

do not use punctuation in the last two lines of the address except for the dash in the ZIP+4 code

(e.g., “12345-6789”). Specific guidance for each line of the address is as follows:

Optional Non-Address Data (Address Line 1)

This line is optional. It appears on the first line in the OCR read area and is followed by the

optional attention line. Use this line for any non-address data such as account numbers, presort

codes, or mail stop codes. Do not use punctuation for this line.

Optional Information/Attention (ATTN) (Address Line 2)

Use this line to direct mail to a specific person within the office or organization identified in the

recipient line. If the letter is sensitive or personal information for the recipient’s eyes only, add

“PERSONAL FOR MS JANE DOE” on this line. Do not use punctuation on this line.

Recipient (Address Line 3)

Use the organization abbreviation and office symbol for the functional area or office. The

organization abbreviation is separated from the office symbol by a virgule (also known as a

slash; labeled as the “/” key on standard keyboards). Do not use punctuation on this line.

Delivery Address (Address Line 4)

The delivery address line contains the street or post office (PO) box number (use one or the

other, never both), and the room or suite number. Use standard address abbreviations or spell

them out fully (e.g., AVE or AVENUE, STE or SUITE) and do not use punctuation on this line.

Post Office (City or Base), State, ZIP Code (Address Line 5)

This line identifies the post office by the city, state, and ZIP code. Use standard USPS two-letter

abbreviations for the state and ZIP+4 codes if known. NOTE: the dash in the ZIP+4 code is the

only punctuation used on this line. With overseas addresses, do not use the APO/FPO number

and geographical location together; doing so enters the mail into international mail channels. Do

not type below the last line of the delivery address.

Barcode Clear Area

The barcode clear area is for barcodes only. Most printers have the ability to print barcodes

which can help route your letter.

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Address Types/Examples (See USPS Publication 28, Appendix A)

CHAPTER 22

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USPS Mail Terminology

Definitions

• Official Mail. Official matter mailed as penalty mail or on which the postage of fees

have been prepaid.

• Official Matter. Official matter is any item belonging to or exclusively pertaining to the

business of the US Government.

• Certified. Provides a receipt to sender and a record of delivery at destination. For use

with First-Class and Priority Mail.

• Insured. Numbered insured service provides a method to obtain evidence of mailing and

a record of delivery.

• Certificate of Mailing. (AF units must not use this service) Provides evidence of mailing.

• Special Handling. (AF units must not use this service) Provides preferential handling to

the extent practical in dispatch and transportation, but does not provide special delivery.

Applicable to third-and fourth-class mail. Special Services

Types

• Pouch Mail: Used to consolidate mail going to the same location. Contact your local

official mail manager or base information transfer center for local pouch listing.

• Holey Joe (Standard Form 65-C): Used to send mail within an organization or base.

Address to the organizational designation and office symbol. If more than one person

falls under the office symbol, consider using an ATTN line.

• Parcels: Labels should be placed on the top of the box or package. Any container used

should be only slightly larger than the mail being sent. Seal boxes and package with

paper tape. To help you select the most cost-effective class of mail, review the definition

listed on the next page.

Rules

• The United States Postal Service (USPS) shall be used only when it is the least costly

transportation method which will meet the required delivery date (RDD), security and

accountability requirements. When mailed, official matter shall move at the lowest

postage and fees cost to meet the RDD, Security, and accountability requirements.

• Official matter becomes official mail when it is postmarked by a distribution center or is

placed under USPS control, whichever occurs first. Official matter ceases to be official

mail when control passes from USPS or its representatives to someone else.

• Personal mail (Rules for Employees). Have personal mail sent to your home, not the

office. Use personal postage to mail job applications, retirement announcements,

greeting cards, personal items, etc.

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Classes

• Express Mail. Fastest and most costly. Use only to prevent mission failure or financial

loss.

• First-Class. Any mailable item weighting 11 ozs. or less. Certain items must be mailed

First-Class such as letters, handwritten or typewritten and post/postal cards.

• Priority. Any mailable First-Class matter weighing over 11 ozs. but less than 70 lbs.

Must be marked PRIORITY.

• Second-Class. For magazines and other periodicals issued at regular, stated frequency of

no less than four times per year.

• Third-Class. For printed matter and parcels under 1 lb. Four ounces or less-same rate as

first-class. Special bulk rates for larger mailings (at least 200 pieces or 50 lbs.)

• Fourth-Class. “Parcel Post” For packages 1 to 70 lbs.

In addition to these classes of mail are two special services—Military Ordinary Mail (MOM) and

registered mail. MOM and registered mail are services added to the standard classes of mail.

• MOM goes by surface transportation within CONUS and by air transportation overseas.

Add MOM to the second-, third-, or fourth-class endorsement on matter having a RDD

not allowing sufficient time for surface transportation. Additional postage is not

required.

• Registered. This service provides added protection for a fee. Use only if required by law

or a directive. Typically slow and expensive compared to other standard handling. For

use only with First-Class and Priority Mail.

Tips

• Make sure mailing address is correct.

• Use of office symbol reduces mail handling time.

• Place city, state and ZIP+4 in the last line of the address.

• Return address is a must. Use your office symbol and ZIP+4.

• Tips for Cost Savings

o Mailing 7 sheets or less of bond paper: use letter size envelope and limit thickness to

1/4” or less when sealed.

o Mailing manuals, pamphlets, etc., weighting over 4 ozs: use third-class, special

fourth-class, bulk rate or bound printed matter rate.

o Mailing several items to one address: cheaper to mail everything in one envelope.

Check with your mailroom for activities serviced by consolidated mailings.

o Check with your mailroom for activities/agencies within the local area that are

serviced by activities/agencies couriers—no postage required.

CHAPTER 23

Air Force Publications/Forms

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CHAPTER 23:

Air Force Publications/Forms

This chapter covers:

• Dual Responsibilities in Developing Publications/Forms

• Publications/Forms Process Overview

• Plain Language Challenge

Official publications/forms serve a vital purpose—they direct and explain the policies and

procedures governing Air Force functions. There may be a time in your military career when

you are tasked to be the action officer to write, revise or develop an official Air Force

publication/form. As the action officer, you are the expert in the various functions, tasks and

skills as well as the data gathering and legal requirements needed for the publication/form to be

effective. Air Force Instruction (AFI) 33-360, Publications and Forms Management, “provides

guidance and procedures on creating, managing, and disseminating directive and nondirective

publications and forms throughout the Air Force” (p. 1). The guidance here is summarized from

AFI 33-360 for the general awareness of all Air Force members.

Dual Responsibilities in Developing Publications/Forms

If you are tasked to create or revise any official Air Force publication or form, you have two

important responsibilities to meet. The first responsibility is to provide clear, accurate guidance

that others understand and follow. The second responsibility is to get guidance out quickly to

those who need it. These responsibilities are equally important, but at times will seem to

conflict. A well-prepared publication or form takes less time to publish and reach its users than a

poorly prepared one. Said another way, a well-prepared publication or form takes the time it

needs to be correct the first time; a poorly prepared publication or form wastes time on the first

effort and requires extra time on the second effort to undo the damage caused by the first.

Always take the time to prepare a well-written publication or form.

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Publications/Forms Process Overview

AFI 33-360, chapter 3, provides an overview of the process for the creation, management, and

dissemination of official publications and forms. The Seven Steps to Effective Communication,

detailed in chapters 3-9 of this manual, are useful throughout the AFI 33-360 process. Become

familiar with the AFI 33-360 process as you prepare and submit a publication or form through

the chain of command and staff for approval and publishing.

Process Overview

(AFI 33-360, Chapter 3)

Seven Steps to Effective Communication

(The Tongue and Quill)

Draft and Collaborate

Staffing

Formal Coordination

Certification

Approval

Publishing

1. Analyze purpose and audience (chapter 3)

2. Research your topic (chapter 4)

3. Support your ideas (chapter 5)

4. Organize and Outline (chapter 6)

5. Draft (chapter 7)

6. Edit (chapter 8)

7. Fight for Feedback and Get Approval (chapter 9)

Plain Language Challenge

Many words may be pronounced in two or more ways to convey different and distinct meanings.

For example, the “Publications/Forms Process Overview” section the paragraph closes with a

sentence that could have used “publication” twice (once as a noun, once as a verb). For clarity,

the verb “dissemination” was used in place of using “publication” as a verb in the same sentence.

Consider the following examples where the same word is used twice with two distinct meanings:

Same Spelling, Different Meaning

• The bandage was wound around the

wound.

• The farm was used to produce produce.

• The dump was so full that it had to refuse

more refuse.

• We used polish to polish the furniture.

• He could lead if he would get the lead out.

• The soldier decided to desert his dessert in

the desert.

• I had to subject the subject to several tests.

• How can I intimate this to my most

intimate friend?

• The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

• Upon seeing the tear I shed a tear.

• The right time to present the present is

now.

• A bass was painted on the bass drum.

• Suddenly the dove dove into the bushes.

• There was a row among the oarsmen

about how to row.

• They were too close to the door to close it.

• The buck does funny things when the does

are present.

• A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a

sewer line.

• To help with planting, the farmer taught

his sow to sow.

•

I did not object to the object.

PART VII

Writing Mechanics

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PART VII:

WRITING MECHANICS

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Writing Mechanics

Everything we write is evaluated for writing mechanics. Sometimes the evaluation comes as a

grade for a class or sometimes your boss is evaluating you, through your written work, for

increased responsibility and other opportunities. Both evaluations are important milestones in

professional development: they can both lead to new and interesting personal and professional

challenges. The chapters in this final part of The Tongue and Quill provide essential guidance on

writing mechanics to help you on your way to new challenges and opportunities on the horizon.

Consider these “funny signs.” What did the author mean and what was actually said? Clearly

these authors need some improvement in their writing mechanics.

FUNNY SIGNS

1. IN A LAUNDROMAT:

Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.

2. IN A LONDON DEPARTMENT STORE:

Bargain Basement Upstairs

3. OUTSIDE A SECOND-HAND SHOP: We exchange anything—bicycles, washing

machines etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain.

4. QUICKSAND WARNING:

Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council.

5. NOTICE IN A DRY CLEANER’S WINDOW:

Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.

6. IN A HEALTH FOOD SHOP WINDOW:

Closed due to illness.

7. SPOTTED IN A SAFARI PARK:

Elephants Please Stay In Your Car

8. SEEN DURING A CONFERENCE:

For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there is a day care on the first floor.

9. NOTICE IN A FIELD:

The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.

10. MESSAGE ON A LEAFLET:

If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.

11. ON A REPAIR SHOP DOOR:

We can repair anything (Please knock hard on the door—the bell doesn’t work).

12. SPOTTED IN A TOILET IN A LONDON OFFICE BLOCK:

Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.

CHAPTER 24

Writing Terminology

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CHAPTER 24:

Writing Terminology

This chapter covers:

• Common Grammatical and Writing Terms

• Irregular Verbs

The Tongue and Quill is not an all-inclusive style manual. This chapter and those that follow

provide Air Force personnel with a quick-reference guide to cure the most common trouble spots

and to encourage standardization of Air Force oral presentations and written products. There are

many style manuals available and no two are exactly alike. Commonly used style guides include

the MLA Style Guide from the Modern Language Association, the Chicago Manual of Style, the

APA Style Guide from the American Psychological Association, the Air University Style Guide

for Writers and Editors, and the US Government Printing Office Style Manual, to name a few.

The Air University Style Guide and The Tongue and Quill are based on the Chicago Manual of

Style, and most of the presentations/papers produced in professional military education courses

follow the Air University Style Guide or The Tongue and Quill.

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Common Grammatical and Writing Terms

Grammar terminology is useful to describe problems with writing. The table, below, provides a

list of grammatical terms with an explanation and example of each. The Tongue and Quill has

tried to de-emphasize terminology and teach through examples throughout this book; however,

sometimes you need an explanation to go with the example. This table emphasizes areas that are

both commonly used and commonly misunderstood, such as the use of modal auxiliaries like

can, could, shall, should, etc.

People who are experts in grammar don’t always write well, and many people

who write well no longer think consciously about grammar … but when

something goes wrong in a sentence, a knowledge of grammar helps in

recognizing the problem and provides a language for discussing it.

–H. Ramsey Fowler

Table of Common Grammatical and Writing Terms

Term Explanation and <Examples>

a/an

Use a before consonant sounds and an before vowel sounds.

Active Voice

Shows the subject as the actor.

Adjective

Describes or limits a noun or pronoun. It answers “Which one? What

kind? or How many?”

Adverbs

Modifies or limits a verb, adjective or another adverb and answers “When?

Where? Why? How much? How far? To what degree?”

(also see “Conjunctive or Connective Adverbs” below)

Antecedent

Noun, phrase, or clause to which a pronoun refers or replaces.

Appositive

Word, phrase, or clause preceding or renaming a noun.

Article

Small set of words used with nouns to limit or give definiteness to the

application.

<a, an, the>

Bibliography

A list of books, articles and other works used in preparing a manuscript or

other written product.

Bullets

Any punctuation symbol used to emphasize specific items.

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Term Explanation and <Examples>

Case

Forms that nouns and pronouns take when they fit into different functions of

the sentence. There are three:

• Nominative—for subjects, predicate nominatives and appositives.

• Objective—for objects and their appositives. <me>

• Possessive—to show ownership, hence adjectival, functions. <my>

Clause

A group of related words containing a subject and a verb.

Conjunctions

Connects words, phrases, clauses or sentences (and, or, but, nor).

Conjunctive or

Connective

Adverbs

Transition words that are often used to connect clauses.

<however, therefore, etc.>

Consonants

All letters of the alphabet except the vowels (a, e, i, o and u). In some

words (synergy), the letter y acts as a vowel.

Glossary

An alphabetical list of unfamiliar terms and their definitions.

Interjection

Words used to express emotion or surprise (e.g., ah, alas, great, help).

Strong interjections are punctuated with an exclamation point.

<Wow! That’s profound.>

Milder interjections are often set off by commas, usually at the beginning of

a sentence.

<Oh, I guess it wasn’t. Ouch, that hurts.>

Modifier

Words or groups of words that limit or describe other words. If improperly

placed, modifiers can confuse the reader or suggest an illogical relationship.

Modal Auxiliary

Verbs that are used with a principal verb that are characteristically used

with a verb of predication and that in English differs formally from other

verbs in lacking -s or -ing forms.

can

could

Primarily expresses ability; cannot is used to deny permission.

Sometimes the past tense of can.

Otherwise, could expresses possibility, doubt or something dependent on

unreal conditions.

may

Originally meant “have the power” (compare to the noun might). Now it

means “permission.” Also, may is used to indicate possibility.

May is also used in wishes.

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Term Explanation and <Examples>

might

Sometimes functions as simple past tense of may.

Often it is used to express a more doubtful possibility than may does.

Might is also used after contrary-to-fact conditions.

shall

should

Shall expresses futurity in the first person; should also expresses futurity in

the first person, but it adds a slight coloring of doubt that the action will

take place. Notice the difference in meaning in these sentences.

In indirect discourse should replaces the shall of direct discourse.

Many speakers who use shall in the first person use would in preference to

should.

Should is used to express likelihood.

Should expresses obligation.

will

would

Will is the common future auxiliary used in the second and third persons. In

addition, it is used with special emphasis to express determination.

Would still indicates past time in expressing determination.

Would expresses customary action in past time.

Would points to future time, but adding doubt or uncertainty.

Would replaces will in indirect discourse.

must

Expresses necessity or obligation. It is somewhat stronger than should.

Must also expresses likelihood.

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Term Explanation and <Examples>

ought

Originally the past tense of owe, but now it points to a present or future

time. Ought is nearly the equivalent of should; ought expresses necessity or

obligation, but with less force than must.

dare

Originally a modal only, it is now used primarily in negatives or questions.

need

Not originally a modal auxiliary, need is now used to mean have to.

<He need only fill out the top form. He need not get upset about the delay

In the meaning “lack,” need is always a regular verb.

Equivalents of modals:

be able to

Used instead of can or could to indicate the ability as a fact rather than a

mere potentiality. It is used also to avoid the ambiguity that may result

from using can to express permission.

be to

Indicates future events but hints at uncertainty.

have to

Commonly substitutes for must. It is a stronger expression of necessity.

Other modals are used in speech, but they are inappropriate in writing.

had rather instead of would rather

had better instead of should or ought

(In speech, had better is emphatic in threats.)

have got to instead of have to

Modals are used with the infinitive of the perfect or progressive.

Can be going.

Could have gone.

Ought to be going.

Ought to have gone.

Nouns

Names a person, place, thing, action or abstract idea.

<woman, office, pencil, game, Ohio, Maxwell AFB, democracy, freedom>

• Abstract Noun—nouns that name qualities rather than material things.

<love, danger>

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Term Explanation and <Examples>

• Collective Noun—nouns that are singular in form but plural in

meaning; names a group of persons or things.

<audience, army, company, flock, committee, trio>

• Concrete Noun—nouns that can be seen or touched.

<table, book>

• Proper Noun—nouns that are capitalized and name specific persons,

places or things.

Number

Shows the singular or plural of nouns, pronouns, or verbs.

Object

Noun or pronoun that is affected by the verb.

Parts of Speech

The basic building blocks of language: nouns, pronouns, verbs, adverbs,

adjectives, prepositions, interjections and conjunctions

Passive Voice

Shows the subject as receiver of the action.

Person

Pronouns that denote the speaker (first person; I, we), the person spoken to

(second person, you), or the person spoken of (third person; she, they).

Phrases

Groups of words without a subject or predicate that function as a unit

(adjective, adverbial, gerund or infinitive phases).

Plagiarism

Using someone else’s writing as if it were your own. This serious offense

can lead to severe professional and legal consequences. If using another

person’s material, identify the borrowed passage and credit the author.

Predicate

Tells what the subject does or what is done to the subject, or the state of

being the subject is in.

Preposition

Shows the relationship between a noun or pronoun to another word in the

sentence.

<by, at, up, down, between, among, through>

Pronouns

Substitutes for a noun. Here are three:

• Definite: includes I, you, he, she, it, we, they, and all of their forms.

• Indefinite: includes words like someone, no one, each, anyone and

anybody.

• Relative: includes words like who, whom, which, that.

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Term Explanation and <Examples>

Sentence

Expresses one complete thought with one subject and one verb; either or

both may be compound.

• Complex Sentence: contains one main clause and at least one

subordinate clause. <When it rains, it pours.>

• Compound Sentence: contains two or more main clauses and no

subordinate clauses. <It rains, and it pours.>

Subject

Tells what the sentence is about; the person, place or thing that performs the

action or that has the state of being indicated by the verb.

Tense

Shows the time of the action, condition or state of being expressed. The

three tenses—past, present, future—can be expressed in the simple, perfect

or progressive.

Verbals

Past and present participle forms of the verbs that act as nouns or adjectives.

There are three:

• Gerund: ends in -ing and functions as a noun. <talking, singing>

• Infinitive: simple verb form used as a noun, adjective, or adverb and

usually preceded by to. <to go, to type>

• Participle: used as an adjective and acts as a modifier in present (-ing),

past (-ed, lost), and perfect (having lost) forms.

Verbs

Expresses action or state of being of the sentence. There are six:

• Transitive: transfers action from the subject to the object.

• Intransitive: transfers no action and is followed by an adverb or

nothing.

• Linking: acts as an equal sign connecting the subject and the

complement.

• Auxiliary or Helping Verb: verb used with another verb to form voice

or perfect and progressive tenses.

• Principal Verb: last verb in a verb phrase.

• Irregular Verb: verbs that form past tense and past participle

differently (see the table of irregular verbs that follows this table)

Vowel

The a, e, i, o and u. In some words, the letter y acts as a vowel.

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Irregular Verbs

Irregular Verbs: Present, Past and Past Participle

Present Past

Past

participle

Present Past

Past

participle

become became become

know knew known

begin began begun

ride rode ridden

bet bet bet

ring rang rung

blow blew blown

rise rose risen

break broke broken

set set set

bring brought brought

shake shook shaken

buy bought bought

sing sang sung

catch caught caught

sink sank sunk

choose chose chosen

speak spoke spoken

come came come

spin spun spun

cut cut cut

steal stole stolen

draw drew drawn

swear swore sworn

drink drank drunk

sweep swept swept

drive drove driven

swim swam swum

eat ate eaten

swing swung swung

fly flew flown

take took taken

forgive forgave forgiven

tear tore torn

freeze froze frozen

think thought thought

give gave given

throw threw thrown

grow grew grown

wear wore worn

keep kept kept

weep wept wept

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CHAPTER 25:

Punctuation

This chapter covers:

• Punctuation: Why Do We Need It?

• Open and Closed Punctuation

• Punctuating Terms in a Series

• Punctuation Usage Guide

• Summary

Punctuation: Why Do We Need It?

Why do we need punctuation? Wouldn’t writing would be easier without punctuation? No

comma faults, no need to worry about open or closed punctuation styles—just words on a page.

Dalton Trumbo used such a style in his novel Johnny Got His Gun, and it is very difficult to

read. Consider the following words:

Punctuation marks are a writers road signs they signal to readers the starts stops

and pauses that are needed to clearly convey the message

While this may not be difficult to read by itself, what if this entire handbook were without

punctuation? Now consider the same words with punctuation:

Punctuation marks are a writer’s road signs. They signal to readers the starts, stops

and pauses that are needed to clearly convey the message.

This is much easier to read and understand, isn’t it? Punctuation marks are aids writers use to

communicate clearly with readers. Improper punctuation can confuse readers, alter the meaning

of a sentence, and decrease reading speed. Using punctuation correctly cures these problems.

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Open and Closed Punctuation

Though many grammar rules are clear-cut, there are some gray areas where the experts disagree.

One area of debate is the use of “open punctuation” versus “closed punctuation.” Open

punctuation advocates believe that writers should use only what’s necessary to prevent

misreading, while closed punctuation advocates are more apt to include punctuation whenever

the grammatical structure of the material justifies it. For example, the following sentence

illustrates how different writers might punctuate a particular sentence:

Open punctuation example—the meaning is clear without using all the punctuation that’s

needed by the grammatical structure:

If used incorrectly they may alter an intended meaning, and if used excessively they

can decrease reading speed and make your meaning difficult to determine.

Closed punctuation example—using all required punctuation does not make meaning clearer

and may slow reading speed:

If used incorrectly, they may alter an intended meaning, and, if used excessively,

they can decrease reading speed and make your meaning difficult to determine.

In the Air Force, the trend is to towards open punctuation. If you’re confused about where to put

commas, sometimes the best solution is to restructure the sentence to make the meaning clearer

and eliminate the need for extra punctuation.

Modified sentence structure example—a slight change in sentence structure results in fewer

words to read and the meaning is clear:

If used incorrectly, they may alter an intended meaning; if used excessively, they

can decrease reading speed and cause confusion.

Punctuating Terms in a Series

Punctuating terms in a series is one area where Air Force writers get conflicting guidance: the

use of commas to separate three or more parallel words, phrases, or clauses in a series. Here’s

the rule and its two variants:

The Rule

Use a comma to separate three or more parallel words, phrases or clauses in a series.

Variants

1. Variant 1—closed punctuation: Include the comma before the final and, or, or nor.

• Will you go by car, train, or plane?

• You will not talk, nor do homework, nor sleep in my class.

2. Variant 2—open punctuation: Exclude the comma before the final and, or or nor.

• Will you go by car, train or plane?

• You will not talk, nor do homework nor sleep in my class.

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Recommendation

The Tongue and Quill has favored and recommended open punctuation for many years. This

recommendation is unchanged, but there are at least three reasons why you might want to

follow the closed punctuation guidelines when punctuating three or more items in a series:

1. Closed punctuation of series is specified in most commercial grammar guides.

2. Closed punctuation of series is specified in some other Air Force references, including

the Air University Style and Author Guide.

3. The additional comma specified in closed punctuation may help clarify your meaning,

especially when the items in the series are longer phrases and clauses (especially when

the clauses include “and” as in “up and down, in and out, and over and under).”

Check to see which approach is preferred for the writing product you’re working on. Award

packages, performance appraisals, military evaluations and other space-constrained formats

typically use open punctuation. Research papers, academic publications and books normally use

closed punctuation. Use the approach that best suits your purpose and the needs of the audience.

Punctuation Usage Guide

Regardless of the style, the function of punctuation is to communicate the writer’s meaning. The

punctuation usage guide that follows covers the most common needs for Air Force writers. Use

the guide to help you punctuate your documents and clearly communicate to your readers.

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Apostrophe

1. Use an apostrophe to create possessive forms of nouns and abbreviations used as nouns.

a. Add ’s to singular or plural nouns that do not end with an s.

• officer’s rank

• the oxen’s tails

• ROTC’s building

• the children’s room

b. Add ’s to singular nouns that end with an s, x or z.

• A business’s contract

• Mr. Jones’s family tree

• Marx’s theories

• Marine Corps’s Ball

• United States’s policy

• Berlioz’s works

c. Add ’s to most singular proper nouns, including names that end with s.

• Burns’s poems

• Jefferson Davis’s home

d. Add only the apostrophe to plural nouns that end in s or with an s sound, or to singular

nouns ending with an s where adding an ’s would cause difficulty in pronunciation.

• The two businesses’ contracts

• for righteousness’ sake

• Our bosses’ schedule

• Officers’ Club

e. Add only the apostrophe to ancient proper names that end with s.

• Jesus’ teaching

• Moses’ law

• Zeus’ temple

• Aristophanes’ play

f. Add ’s to the final word of compound nouns to show possession.

• secretary-treasurer’s report

• eyewitness’ comment

• attorney general’s book

• mother-in-law’s car

• mothers-in-law’s cars

g. Add ’s to show possession for indefinite pronouns (someone, no one, each, anyone,

anybody, etc.), add ‘s to last component of the pronoun.

• someone’s car

• somebody else’s book

h. To show joint possession for two or more nouns, add the apostrophe or ’s to the last

noun. Add only the apostrophe to plural nouns ending in s and ’s to singular nouns.

• girls and boys’ club

• aunt and uncle’s house

• Diane and Wayne’s daughters

i. To show separate possession, place the possession indicators on each noun or pronoun

identifying a possessor.

• soldiers’ and sailors’ uniforms

• Mrs. Williams’s and Mr. Smith’s classes

• king’s and queen’s jewels

• son’s and daughter’s toys

------------

Few men are lacking in capacity, but they fail because they are lacking in

application.

–Calvin Coolidge

’

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2. Use an apostrophe to mark omissions or form contractions.

• can’t (can not)

• mustn’t (must not)

• don’t (do not)

• wouldn’t (would not)

• I’m (I am)

• won’t (will not)

• I’ve (I have)

• you’ll (you will)

• let’s (let us)

• it’s (it is)

• rock ‘n’ roll (rock and roll)

• jack-o’-lantern

3. Use an apostrophe to form plurals.

Use an apostrophe to form plurals of certain letters and abbreviations. Make all individual

lowercase letters plural by adding ‘s and make individual capital letters plural by adding s alone

unless confusion would result. (For example, apostrophes are used with the plurals of A, I, and

U because adding an s forms the words As, Is, and Us.) To plural most abbreviations (upper and

lowercase), add a lowercase s. If the singular form contains an apostrophe, add s to form plural.

• dotting the i’s

• OPRs, EPRs, TRs

• 1960s

• the three Rs

• S’s, A’s, I’s, U’s

• Bs, 1s

• bldgs (buildings)

• B-52s

• six the’s

• ain’ts

• ma’ams

• mustn’ts

4. Use an apostrophe to mark a quote within a quote.

“Let’s adopt this slogan: ‘Quality first.’”

5. Use an apostrophe to represent units of measurement in technical writing (or the accent

mark if the apostrophe symbol is not available).

• To specify a length of feet in a measure (The room measures 16’ by 29’)

• To specify an angle measured in minutes (60’ = 1 degree).

• To specify geographical latitude and longitude expressed in degrees, minutes, and

seconds. An apostrophe marks the minutes, and seconds are identified with quotation

marks. If using the accent mark, a single accent mark identifies the minutes; a double

accent mark specifies the seconds.

Example: The coordinates are 35

40’ 30” N x 60

20’ 30” W.

Format. Be aware that cutting and pasting into word processors from several files or file types

can mix two formats for the apostrophe and quotation marks. The normal format is for the

apostrophe and quotation marks to be curved; the format in some documents uses “straight

quotes.” Once the cut-and-paste task is finished, The Tongue and Quill recommends a global

find and replace for apostrophes and quotation marks to standardize the format to the normal

curved style.

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Asterisk

1. Use the asterisk to refer a reader to footnotes placed at the bottom of a page.

• One asterisk* identifies the first footnote

• Two asterisks** identify a second footnote

• Three asterisks*** identify a third footnote.

• Number the footnotes if you have more than three. If it is a literary document, number

the footnotes if you need more than one footnote.

2. Use asterisks to replace words that are considered unprintable.

It is a good thing that no cameras or recording devices were present when Smith called

Schultz a ***** tonight at the party.

Spacing when using an asterisk

• No space before following a word or punctuation mark within sentence or at the end of a

sentence—unless replacing unprintable words, then one space before.

• One space after following a word or punctuation mark within a sentence.

• Two spaces after following a punctuation mark at the end of a sentence—unless

manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after. (The Tongue and Quill

favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. The decision to use one space or two is left

up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable, but be consistent!)

• No space after an asterisk in a footnote.

Asterisk footnote samples. If the asterisks in the first paragraph of this page were to appear as

footnotes, they would appear as follows at the bottom of the footnoted page, separated from the

text by a footnote bar (generated automatically in Word) as shown below.

_______________________

*The asterisk can be used as a mark of punctuation to indicate a footnote.

**Use the asterisk with other punctuation as shown here.

***Number the footnotes if you have more than three—unless a literary document.

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Brackets

1. Use brackets to clarify or correct material written by others.

• To clarify: He arrived on the 1st [2d] of June.

• To correct: The statue [sic] was added to the book of statutes.

When [sic] appears in the text, as in the example above, it tells the reader something is

wrong with the word immediately in front of the first bracket but the word is reproduced

exactly as it appeared in the original.

2. Use brackets to insert explanatory words, editorial remarks or phrases independent of

the sentence or quoted material.

• Tell them [the students] to report to the auditorium now.

• The tank-versus-tank battles of Villers-Brettoneux is the last significant event for the tank

in World War I. [Other accounts of this battle give different versions.]

3. Use brackets to indicate you’ve added special emphasis (e.g., italics, bold, underline, all

capitals) to quoted material when the emphasis was not in the original work. The bracketed

material may be placed immediately following the emphasized word(s) or at the end of the

quotation.

• She [emphasis added] seemed willing to compromise, but his strategy prevailed.

• Tell them to report to the auditorium now. [Emphasis added.]

4. Use brackets to enclose an acronym’s definition (the acronym written out) or a

parenthetical phrase that falls within a parenthetical phrase.

• (All military personnel will wear the UOD [uniform of the day] for the ceremony.)

• (There are three primary theories [or frameworks] for the study of airpower.)

Spacing when using brackets (Opening bracket)

• One space before when parenthetic matter is within a sentence.

• Two spaces before when parenthetic matter follows a sentence (when parenthetic matter

starts with a capital and closes with its own sentence punctuation), unless manuscript

format and using right justified text, then one space before.

• No space after.

Spacing when using brackets (Closing bracket)

• No space before.

• One space after when parenthetic matter is within a sentence or when in manuscript

format and using right justified; two spaces after when parenthetic matter is itself a

complete sentence and another sentence follows.

• No space after if another punctuation mark immediately follows.

[ ]

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Colon

1. Use a colon to separate an introductory statement from explanatory or summarizing

material that follows when there is no coordinating conjunction or transitional expression.

(Capitalize the first word of the expression that follows the colon if it is the dominant element

and is a complete sentence. For additional details, see the “Capitalization” section.)

• Living in base housing has many advantages: People can walk to work, shopping is

convenient, and there are organized activities for the children.

• The board consists of three officials: a director, deputy director and recorder.

2. Use a colon when a sentence contains an expression such as following or as follows or is

followed by a list. Notice the capitalization and punctuation in the examples.

• The new directive achieved the following results: better morale and improved relations.

• Results were as follows: better morale, less work and more pay.

• Consider these advantages when making your decision:

o You won’t have to be somewhere at 0800 every day.

o You can get more involved in community activities.

o You can pursue hobbies you haven’t had time for in the last year.

3. Use a colon to indicate a full stop before an enumerated or explanatory list.

There are several possibilities for the analyst position: (1) it could remain vacant, (2) it could

be converted to a civilian position, or (3) another military member within the organization

could be temporarily detailed to the position.

4. Use a colon with a quotation when the word “say” or a substitute for say has been

omitted, when the introductory expression is an independent clause, and when the

quotation is typed in indented form on separate lines from the introductory clause.

• The general turned [and said]: “Who gave that order?”

• The judge rendered her decision: “Bail is denied.”

• The speaker said:

“The words you will hear from this stage today are the words and opinions of one

man—me. I do not come as a representative of my company. I will not answer any

question that is in any way related to the company for which I work.”

5. Use a colon to express periods of clock time in figures and to represent the word to in

ratios and proportions. Do not use a colon when expressing time on a 24-hour clock.

• Time: There is an appointment available at 1430 (2:30 p.m.).

• Ratios: Dilute the concentrate with water using a ratio of 5:1 for a mild cleanser.

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6. Use a colon when expressing library references to separate title and subtitle, volume and

page number, city of publication and name of publisher in footnotes, and bibliographies.

• Book title: Mail Fraud: What You Can Do About It

• Volume reference: 10:31-34 (Volume 10, pages 31 to 34)

• Publisher reference: New York: MacMillan Company

7. Do NOT use a colon when the enumerated items complete the sentence that introduces

them. Notice the punctuation and capitalization in this example.

Liaison officers must [Not “Liaison officers must:”]

a. become familiar with the situation,

b. know the mission and

c. arrange for communications.

8. Do NOT use a colon when an explanatory series follows a preposition or a verb (except

as in rule 4 for the “Use a colon…” on the previous page).

• [Right] The editorial assistants are Rebecca, Lisa and Yuna.

• [Wrong] The editorial assistants are: Rebecca, Lisa and Yuna.

9. Do NOT use a colon to introduce an enumerated list that is a complement or the object

of an element in the introductory statement.

• [Right] Our goals are to (1) learn the basic dance steps, (2) exercise while having fun,

and (3) meet new people.

• [Wrong] Our goals are to: (1) learn the basic …

10. Do NOT use a colon when the anticipatory expression is followed by another sentence.

The command section will bring the following foods to the party. The buffet line will be

opened at noon with the enlisted personnel being served first.

• Taco Bake

• tossed salad

• chips

• dip

Spacing when using colons

• No space before.

• Two spaces after within a sentence—unless manuscript format and using right justified,

then one space after.

• No space before or after in expressions of time (8:20 p.m.) or proportions (2:1).

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Comma

1. Use a comma with the coordinating conjunctions and, but, or, or nor when joining two or

more independent clauses.

• [Right] The art of war is constantly developing, but twentieth-century technology has so

speeded up the change the military strategist now must run to keep pace.

• [Wrong] The rapid expansion of the Air Force ensures a continuing need for qualified

college graduates to fill existing vacancies, and also ensures ample opportunities for

advancement. [This example contains only one independent clause with a compound

verb; therefore, no comma is necessary.]

NOTE: No comma is needed if the sentence has one subject with a compound predicate

connected with a coordinating conjunction because the second half of the sentence is not an

independent clause.

o Mary Jones received her master’s degree last December and is now considering

pursuing a doctorate degree in education.

o I am not only willing to go but also ready to stay a week.

2. Use a comma to separate three or more parallel words, phrases or clauses in a series.

• In open punctuation, exclude the comma before the final and, or or nor.

“Will you go by car, train or plane?” [open punctuation]

• In closed punctuation, include the comma before the final and, or, or nor.

“You will not talk, nor do homework, nor sleep in my class.” [closed punctuation]

• For longer phrases and clauses in a series, the additional comma specified in closed

punctuation may help readability. “Patients are classified as suitable for treatment at the

installation, as requiring evacuation to the regional hospital, or as fit for duty.”

• The use of etc. is discouraged in running text, but when used, it must be set off with

commas. Do not use etc. when using e.g., for example, or such as. These terms indicate

you are only giving some examples; there is no need to imply there could be more.

“We will bake cookies, bread, cupcakes, etc., for the party.”

3. Use a comma with parallel adjectives that modify the same noun. If the adjectives are

independent of each other, if the order can be reversed or if and can stand between the words, the

adjectives are parallel and should be separated by a comma. However, if the first adjective

modifies the idea expressed by the combination of the second adjective and the noun, do not use

a comma.

• a hard, cold winter; a long, hot summer [the summer was long and hot]

• a heavy winter overcoat [winter modifies overcoat; heavy modifies winter overcoat]

• a traditional political institution [political modifies institution; traditional modifies

political institution]

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4. Use a comma to separate two or more complementary phrases that refer to a single

word that follows.

The coldest, if not the most severe, winter Ohio has had was in 1996.

5. Use a comma to set off nonessential or interrupting words and phrases.

a. To set off nonessential words, clauses, or phrases not necessary for the meaning or

the structural completeness of the sentence. You can tell whether an expression is

nonessential or essential by trying to omit the expression. If you can omit the expression

without affecting the meaning or the structural completeness of the sentence, the

expression is nonessential and should be set off by commas.

• They want to hire Leigh Iris, who has 10 years of experience, to run the new center.

[The phrase “who has 10 years of experience” is nonessential information.]

• They want to hire someone who has at least 10 years of experience to run the center.

[The phrase “who has at least 10 years of experience” is essential information.]

• There is, no doubt, a reasonable explanation.

[This sentence would be complete without “no doubt.”]

• There is no doubt about her integrity.

[This sentence would be incomplete without “no doubt.”]

• This rule includes interrupting words, phrases, or clauses that break the flow of the

sentence.

• The faculty and staff, military, and civilian, are invited.

• She is a lieutenant colonel, not a major, and will be our new executive officer.

• The major, a recent promotee, is an experienced pilot.

b. With transitional words and phrases, such as however, that is (i.e.), namely,

therefore, for example (e.g.), moreover, consequently, and on the other hand, when

interrupting the flow of the sentence. A comma is normally used after these

expressions, but the punctuation preceding is dictated by the magnitude of the break in

continuity. However, when these words or phrases are used to emphasize meaning, do

not set off with punctuation.

• It is important, therefore, we leave immediately.

• It is therefore vitally important we don’t postpone the trip.

• A. Eaves is highly qualified for the job; i.e., he has 16 years of experience!

• Rebecca and Julie say they will attend—that is, if Robert and Lisa are attending.

• Planes from several bases (e.g., Dover, Lackland and Tyndall) will be in the airshow.

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c. To set off a phrase introduced by accompanied by, along with, and not, as well as,

besides, except, in addition to, including, plus, not even, rather than, such as, together

with, or a similar expression when it falls between the subject and the verb.

• The faculty and staff, as well as the students, should be prepared for the inspection.

• The fifth and sixth graders, plus their parents, will be transported by bus.

• When the phrase occurs elsewhere in the sentence, commas may be omitted if the

phrase is clearly related to the preceding words.

“We agree, Miss Johnson, our policy was badly processed as well as lost in the mail.”

d. With the adverb too (meaning also) when it falls between the subject and verb.

Omit the comma before too if it occurs at the end of a sentence or clause.

• You, too, can save money by shopping selectively.

• You should try to improve your typing too.

• If you want to bring the children too, we’ll have room.

e. To set off nonessential appositives. An appositive is a word or phrase appearing

next to a noun that identifies it and is equivalent to it. If the appositive is

nonessential, set it off by commas. If essential or restrictive in nature, do not set it

off by commas.

• Our cost analyst, Mrs. Sherri Thomas, will handle the details. [In this hypothetical

example, we have only one cost analyst, so Mrs. Thomas is “nonessential.” If we

eliminate her name, the meaning of the sentence would not change.]

• The battleship Pennsylvania was taken out of mothballs today. [Pennsylvania is

“essential” to the sentence because there is more than one battleship in mothballs.]

• Their daughter Julie won the contest. The other daughters were really annoyed.

[Since they have more than one daughter her name is essential to the sentence.]

• Edward shares a house with his wife Esther in Prattville, Alabama. [Strictly

speaking, Esther should be set off by commas because he can have only one wife and

giving her name is nonessential information; however, because the words wife and

Esther are so closely related and usually spoken as a unit, commas may be omitted.]

f. To set off the title, position, or organization after a person’s name or name

equivalent. (Some cases under this rule are appositives; other cases are not.)

• John Kerry, Secretary of State, will speak at the graduation ceremony.

• The commander, 42d Air Base Wing, is responsible for…

g. To set off long phrases denote a residence or business connection immediately

following a name.

• Lieutenant Colonel Fernando Ordoñez, of the Peruvian air force in Lima, Peru, will

be here tomorrow.

• Lt Col Orlando of Lima, Peru, will be here tomorrow. [The comma is omitted

between “Orlando” and “of” to avoid too many breaks in a short phrase.]

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6. Use a comma to set off introductory elements.

a. With introductory elements that begin a sentence and come before the subject and

verb of the main clause. The comma may be omitted if the introductory phrase is five

words or less except when numbers occur together. If you choose to use a comma

following a short introductory phrase, do so consistently throughout the document.

• In 1923, 834 cases of measles were reported in that city.

• In 1913 the concept of total war was unknown.

• Of all the desserts I love, my favorite is the fruit trifle.

• Since the school year had already begun, we delayed the curriculum change.

b. After introductory words such as yes, no or oh.

• Yes, I’ll do it.

• Oh, I see your point.

7. Use a comma to set off explanatory dates, addresses, and place names.

• The change of command, 1 October 2014, was the turning point.

• The British prime minister lives at 10 Downing Street, London, England.

• Use two commas to set off the name of a state, county, or country when it directly

follows the name of a city without the ZIP code. “The Wright brothers opened a flying

school in Montgomery, Alabama, where Maxwell Air Force Base is now located.”

• When the ZIP code follows the name of the state, drop the comma between the two, but

use one after the ZIP code number if there is additional text. “We shipped the package to

325 Chennault Circle, Montgomery AL 36112-6427, but it hasn’t been received yet.”

8. Use a comma to set off statements such as he said, she replied, they answered and she

announced.

• She said, “Welcome to the Chamber of Commerce. May I help you?”

• She replied, “I have an appointment with Lt Col Rick Jenkins at 10 a.m.”

NOTE: If a quotation functions as an integral part of a sentence, commas are unnecessary.

They even considered “No guts, no glory!” as their slogan.

9. Use a comma to set off names and titles used in direct address.

• No, sir, I didn’t see her.

• Linda McBeth, you’re not changing jobs, are you?

10. Use a comma with afterthoughts (words, phrases, or clauses added to the end of a

sentence). NOTE: The word “too” at the end of a sentence does not require a comma—see

Rule 5d.

• It isn’t too late to get tickets, is it?

• Send them home as soon as possible, please.

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11. Use a comma in the following miscellaneous constructions:

a. To indicate omission of words in repeating a construction.

We had a tactical reserve; now, nothing. [The comma replaces “we have.”]

b. Before for used as a conjunction.

She didn’t go to the party, for she cannot stand smoke-filled rooms.

c. To separate repeated words.

• That was a long, long time ago.

• Well, well, look who’s here.

d. With titles following personal names. Jr. and Sr. are set off by commas; 2d, 3d, II, and

III are not. In text, “Lee B. Walker, Sr.” becomes “Lee B. Walker, Sr., is …” When you

must show possession, drop the comma following Jr. and Sr. “Lee Walker, Sr.’s car …”

• Henry Ford II

• Lee B. Walker, Sr.

• James Stokes 3d [or “III”]

e. When names are reversed.

• Adams, Angie

• Middleton, Mary

• Baldwin, Sherwood, Jr.

• Parks, James, III

• Brown, Carolyn

• Price, William, Esq.

• Ford, Henry, II

• Walker, Lee B., Sr.

• First M. Last, IV

f. With academic degrees.

• James Parks III, MBA

• Scott H. Brown, PhD

• In narrative text: “Scott H. Brown, PhD, will …”

g. To prevent confusion or misreading.

• To John, Smith was an honorable man.

• For each group of 20, 10 were rejected.

• Soon after, the meeting was interrupted abruptly.

Spacing when using commas

• No space before.

• One space after, unless a closing quotation mark immediately follows the comma.

• No space after within a number.

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Dashes

The em dash (—) (typically three hyphens linked as a single character)

1. Use an em dash to indicate a sudden break or abrupt change in thought.

• He is going—no, he’s turning back.

• Our new building should be—will be—completed by June 2004.

2. Use an em dash to give special emphasis to the second independent clause in a

compound sentence.

• Our new, but used, pickup truck is great—it’s economical too!

• You’ll double your money with this plan—and I’ll prove it!

3. Use an em dash to emphasize single words.

• Girls—that’s all he ever thinks about!

• They’re interested in one thing only—profit—nothing else matters.

4. Use an em dash to emphasize or restate a previous thought.

One day last week—Monday, I think—Congress finally voted on the amendment.

5. Use an em dash before summarizing words such as these, they and all when those words

summarize a series of ideas or list of details.

• A tennis racket, swimsuit and shorts—these are all you’ll need for the weekend.

• Faculty, staff and students—all are invited.

6. Use an em dash in place of commas to set off a nonessential element requiring special

emphasis.

• There’s an error in one paragraph—the second one.

• Ensure all students—as well as faculty members—are informed of the briefing.

7. Use an em dash to set off a nonessential element when the nonessential element contains

internal commas

Certain subjects—American government, calculus and chemistry—are required courses.

8. Use an em dash instead of parentheses when a nonessential item requires strong

emphasis (dashes emphasize; parentheses de-emphasize).

Call Lieutenant Colonels Sims and Forbes—the real experts—and get their opinion.

9. Use an em dash in place of a colon for a strong, but less formal, break in introducing

explanatory words, phrases or clauses

Our arrangement with the publisher is simple—we provide the camera-ready copy, and they

handle the printing and distribution).

— and –

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10. Use an em dash with quotation marks. Place the dash outside the closing quotation mark

when the sentence breaks off after the quotation and inside the closing quotation mark to indicate

the speaker’s words have broken off abruptly.

• If I hear one more person say, “See what I’m saying!?”—

• Thomas Hardy said, “When I get to 25 Barberry Street, I’ll—”

11. Use an em dash with a question mark or an exclamation mark:

a. When a sentence contains a question or exclamation that is set off by dashes, put the

appropriate punctuation mark before the closing dash.

• I’ll attend Friday’s meeting—is it being held at the same place?—but I’ll have to

leave early for another appointment.

• He’s busy now, sir—wait, don’t go in there!—I’ll call you when he’s free.

b. When a sentence abruptly breaks off before the end of a question or exclamation, put the

end punctuation mark immediately following the dash.

• Shall I do it or—?

• Look out for the—!

The en dash (–) (typically two hyphens linked as a single character)

12. Before the source of a quotation credit line in printed or typed material.

The ornaments of a home are the friends who frequent it.

–Anonymous

13. To indicate inclusive numbers (dates, page numbers, time) when not introduced by the

word from or between.

• The instructions are on pages 15–30 of the text and from pages 3 to 10 in the handout.

• My appointment is 0800–0900. I will be there between 0745 and 0800.

• She worked there from 1979 to 1996 and she said the 1990–1996 period went by quickly.

14. In a compound adjective when one element has two words or a hyphenated word.

• New York–London flight

• Air Force–wide changes

• quasi-public–quasi-judicial body

Spacing when using dashes

• No space before or after an em dash (—) or en dash (–) within a sentence.

• Two spaces after the em dash at the end of a sentence that breaks off abruptly (rule 10)—

unless manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after.

• When using a typewriter. No space before, between or after the em dash or en dash; the

em dash is made using three hyphens (---); the en dash is made using two hyphens (--).

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Display Dots/Bullets

1. Use display dots/bullets* to emphasize specific items in either complete or incomplete

sentences that are parallel in grammatical structure.

2. Use display dots/bullets when one item is not more important than the others and the

items do not show a sequence. (If the items show a sequence, use a numbered list.)

3. Capitalize the first word of each item in the display dot/bullet list when a complete

sentence introduces them. (The complete sentence may end with either a period or a colon.)

• The prospect for growing drug abuse worldwide can be correlated with the prevalence of

the following ingredients:

o An awareness of drugs

o Access to them

o The motivation to use them

• The Coast Guard is a multi-mission agency in the maritime arena.

o Safety

o Environmental protection

o Law enforcement

o Political-military

4. Use a period (or other appropriate end punctuation) after each item in a display

dot/bullet vertical list when at least one of the items is a complete sentence.

• After listening intently to the defense attorney’s closing remarks, the jury was convinced

of three things:

o Witnesses lied.

o False evidence had been presented.

o The defendant deserved a new trial.

• Two questions continually present themselves to commanders:

o What is actually happening?

o What (if anything) can I or should I do about it?

__________________________

*A “bullet” is a generic term for any graphical symbol used to emphasize different items in a list.

Display dots, squares, dashes and arrows are the most common symbols used for this purpose,

but today’s software makes any number of designs possible. Regardless of your choice of bullet

graphic, the above guidelines will help readability



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5. When the list completes a sentence begun in the introductory element, omit the final

period unless the items are separated by other punctuation.

There is a tendency to speak of the commander, but there are, in fact, many interrelated

commanders, and each commander uses a separate command and control process to

o make information decisions about the situation,

o make operational decisions about actions to be taken, and

o cause them to be executed within a structure established by prior decisions.

6. A colon can be used to indicate a full stop before a list. A colon is often used with

expressions such as the following items or as follows.

Consider the following advantages when making your decision:

• You won’t have to be somewhere at 0800 every day.

• You can get more involved in community activities.

• You can pursue hobbies you haven’t had time for in the last year.

7. Do not use a colon when the listed items complete the sentence that introduces them.

• Liaison officers must

[Not “Liaison officers must:”]

o become familiar with the situation,

o know the mission, and

o arrange for communications.

• The editorial assistants in Production are

[Not “The editorial assistants in Production are:”]

o Rebecca Bryant,

o Cheryl Cooper,

o Darlene Barnes, and

o Vanessa Clemons.

Spacing when using display dots and bullets

• No space before

• Two spaces after in most cases

• One space after if in manuscript format and using right justified

• Hang indent all remaining lines

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Ellipsis

The ellipsis in Air Force work is written as three points without a space between them. Most

word processors automatically create a single-glyph character for the ellipsis if three periods

are typed followed by a stroke on the space bar.

1. Use an ellipsis to indicate a pause or faltering speech within a quoted sentence or at the

end of a sentence that is deliberately incomplete.

• “I … I don’t know … I mean, I don’t know if I can go.”

• What would you do …?

2. Use an ellipsis to indicate an omission of a portion of quoted material.

“Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth … a new nation … dedicated to

the proposition that all men are created equal.”

3. Use a period followed by an ellipsis to indicate the omission of the end of a sentence.

Work must be measured.… Without such metrics, how can production be assessed?

4. Use an ellipsis without a period if the statement is intended to trail off.

He could have easily saved the situation by … But why talk about it?

5. Use an ellipsis before the ending punctuation to indicate an omission from the end of a

question or an exclamation.

What rubric was used to grade the assignment …? Rubrics are essential for consistency.

6. Use an ellipsis immediately after the terminal punctuation of a sentence to indicate that

one or more following sentences or paragraphs have been omitted.

In the last few years, we have witnessed a big change in the age groups of America’s

violence.… How far and wide these changes extend, we are afraid to say.

7. Do NOT use an ellipsis to signify the omission of words before or after the fragment

when a fragment of a sentence is quoted within another sentence or to show the omission of

text before or after a quotation, such as an in an epigraph.

Technicians tell us it “requires a steady stream of accurate and reliable reports” to keep the

system operating at peak performance.

Spacing with the ellipsis

• No space between the three periods within the ellipsis itself.

• One space before and after the ellipsis within a sentence.

• No space before the ellipsis when an opening quotation mark precedes it, and no space

after the ellipsis when a closing quotation mark follows it.

• No space between the ellipsis and a closing question mark or exclamation point.

• Two spaces after ellipsis when it follows a period, question mark or exclamation point

unless following manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after.

…

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Exclamation Mark

1. Use an exclamation mark at the end of a sentence or elliptical expression (condensed

sentence, key words left out) to express strong emotion (surprise, disbelief, irony, dissent,

urgency, amusement, enthusiasm).

• Congratulations on your new son!

• I suppose you consider that another “first”!

• Fantastic show!

2. Use an exclamation mark in parentheses within a sentence to emphasize a particular

word.

• He lost 67(!) pounds in 6 months.

• She said what(!)?

3. Use an exclamation mark along with dashes: when an exclamation is set off by dashes

within a sentence, use an exclamation mark before the closing dash. Most users of The

Tongue and Quill regularly encounter exclamation points in evaluation reports. When used on

evaluation reports, exclamation points should be used sparingly, such as in the following

example, to maintain the impact of the exclamation point and not overwhelm the reader:

Our women’s club—number 1 in the area!—will host a party for underprivileged children.

4. Use an exclamation mark inside a closing parenthesis of a parenthetical phrase when the

phrase requires an exclamation mark and the sentence does not end with an exclamation

mark.

• Jerry’s new car (a 2004 Nissan Maxima!) was easily financed.

• The football game (Alabama versus Auburn) is always a super game!

5. Use an exclamation mark inside a closing quotation mark only when it applies to the

quoted material.

• Lt Col Smith said, “Those rumors that I’m going to retire early simply must stop!”

• You’re quite mistaken—Jane Palmisano clearly said, “Peachtree Grill at 1215”!

• Mark and Todd have both told him, “You had no right to say, ‘Kimberly will be glad to

teach Acquisition’ without checking with her first!”

Spacing when using the exclamation mark with other punctuation marks

• Two spaces after the end of a sentence—unless manuscript format and using right

justified, then one space after.

• No space after when another punctuation mark immediately follows (closing quotation

mark, closing parenthesis, closing dash).

• The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable.

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Hyphen

1. Use a hyphen when dividing a word at the end of a line.

Use the “Dividing Words and Paragraphs” tips at the end of this chapter for the continua-

tion of words at the end of a line or paragraphs at the end of a page.

2. Use a hyphen to join unit modifiers; when you abbreviate the unit of measure, omit the

hyphen.

• long-term loan

• rust-resistant cover

• 4-hour sortie, 4 hr sortie

• 24-gallon tank, 24 gal. tank

3. Use a hyphen when expressing the numbers 21 through 99 in words and in adjective

compounds with a numerical first element.

• Twenty-one people attended with at least 2 that failed to show up.

• Eighty-nine or ninety miles from here there’s an outlet mall.

• I kept their 3-year-old child while they were away.

• There will be a 10-minute delay.

4. Use a hyphen to join single capital letters to nouns or participles.

• E-mail

• H-bomb

• T-bone; T-shirt

• U-boat; U-turn

5. Use a hyphen to indicate two or more related compound words having a common base

(suspended hyphen).

• It will be a 12- to 15-page document.

• The cruise line offers 2-, 3- and 7-day cruises at special group rates.

• Long- and short-term money rates are available.

6. Use a hyphen to join capital letter(s) and numbers in system designators and numerical

identifiers.

• F-117

• B-1B

• F-16

• KC-10

• Su-24

• T-38

7. Use a hyphen to form compound words and phrases. Some compound words are written

as two words (post office, air brake, Mother Nature, fellow traveler), some as one (manpower,

masterpiece, aircraft), some as a combination of words and joined by hyphens (father-in-law,

great-uncle, secretary-treasurer, governor-general, men-of-war, grant-in-aid, mother-of-pearl),

and some multiple-word compounds that include a preposition and a description (jack-of-all-

trades, but flash in a pan and master of none). There’s a growing trend to spell compound words

as one word once widely accepted and used. However, sometimes the way you use a compound

word or phrase will dictate how you write it—as one word, with a hyphen, or as two separate

words. When in doubt, consult an up-to-date dictionary or treat as two words if the guidelines

on the next pages don’t fit.

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a. Use a hyphen with words and phrases that are combined to form a unit modifier

immediately preceding the word modified (except with an adverb ending in ly). Do

not hyphenate these phrases when they follow the noun.

• an up-to-date report; this report is up to date

• red-faced man; the man with the red face

• a $500-a-week salary; a salary of $500 a week

• decision-making process; the process of decision making

• the X-ray equipment; the X-ray showed

• a well-known author; the author is well known

• a first-come, first-served basis; on the basis of first come, first served

b. Use a hyphen when two or more proper names are combined to form a one-thought

modifier and when two adjectives are joined by the word “and” or “or.”

• Denver-Dallas-Atlanta flight

• life-and-death situation

• black-and-white terms

• cause-and-effect hypothesis

• yes-or-no answer

• go/no-go decision

c. Use a hyphen when spelling the word without the hyphen creates a homonym.

• re-cover [cover again]; recover [to regain]

• re-creation [create again]; recreation [play]

• re-count [count again]; recount [to detail]

• re-mark [mark again]; remark [say]

• re-sign [sign again]; resign [quit]

• re-treat [treat again]; retreat [withdraw]

• co-op [cooperative]; coop [to confine]

• multi-ply [as in fabric]; multiply [arithmetic function]

d. Use a hyphen to avoid doubling a vowel when the last letter of the prefix “anti,”

“multi,” and “semi” is the same as the first letter of the word. Also, use a hyphen

when the second element is a capitalized word or a number.

• anti-inflammatory; anti-Nazi, antiaircraft

• multi-industry; multielement; multimillion

• semi-icing; semi-Americanized; semiofficial

• ultra-German; pre-1914, post-World War II

e. Use a hyphen to join duplicate prefixes.

• re-redirect

• sub-subcommittee

• super-superlative

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8. Do NOT use a hyphen in these situations:

a. In compounds formed from unhyphenated proper nouns.

• Southeast Asian country

• Mobile Bay cruise

b. Between an independent adjective preceding a noun.

• hot water pipe

• big gray cat

c. In a compound adjective when the first element of a color term modifies the second.

• sea green gown

• grayish blue car

d. In a compound adjective formed with chemical names.

• carbon dioxide formula

• hydrochloric acid liquid

e. In a unit modifier with a letter or number as its second element.

• Attachment 3 pages 1-5

• Article 3 procedures

f. In a unit modifier enclosed in quotation mark unless it is normally a hyphenated

term. Quotation marks are not to be used in lieu of a hyphen.

• “blue sky” law

• “tie-in” sale

• right-to-work state

g. In a unit modifier to set off some prefixes and suffixes (ante, anti, bi, bio, co,

counter, extra, infra, inter, intra, like, macro, meta, micro, mid, multi, neo, non,

over, post, per, pre, pro, proto, pseudo, sub, re, semi, socio, super, supra, trans,

ultra, un, under), but there are some exceptions.

(1) All words are hyphenated when used as an adjective compound.

• all-inclusive background

• all-out war

(2) Best, better, full, high, ill, least, lesser, little, low, lower, middle and upper

compounds are hyphenated when used as an adjective before a noun;

drop the hyphen when used following the noun.

• best-loved book; the book was best loved

• better-prepared man; the man was better prepared

• full-length dress; the dress is full length

• high-level water; water is at the high level

• ill-advised action; action is ill advised

• least-desirable man; the man was least desirable

• lesser-regarded man; he was the lesser regarded

• little-understood man; the man was little understood

• low-level flight; flying at low level

• lower-level position; entry jobs are at a lower level

• middle-class house; he lives with the middle class

• upper-crust society; she is of the upper crust

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(3) Some cross and half words are hyphenated, but some aren’t. Check your dictionary

and, if not listed, hyphenate.

• crosswalk

• cross-pollination

• cross section

• halfback

• half-dollar

• half sister

(4) Elect words are hyphenated, except when they consist of two or more words.

• mayor-elect; president-elect; senator-elect

• county assessor elect

(5) Ex (meaning former) words are discouraged in formal writing; former is preferred.

However, when you use ex in this context, use a hyphen.

• ex-governor

• ex-commander

• ex-convict

(6) Fold words are usually one word, except when used with numerals.

• 25-fold

• Tenfold

• Twofold

(7) Like words are usually one word except when the first element is a proper name,

words of three or more syllables, compound words, or to avoid tripling a consonant.

• gridlike

• lifelike

• Grecian-like

• mystery-like

• wall-like

• squeeze-bottle-like

(8) Mid, Post and Pre words are usually one word except when the second element

begins with a capital letter or is a number.

• midstream

• postgame

• preeminent

• mid-June

• post-Gothic

• pre-Civil War

• mid-1948

• post-1900s

• pre-1700s

(9) Non words are usually one word except when the second element begins with a

capital letter or consists of more than one word.

• noncommissioned officer

• nonattribution

• nonsurgical

• non-Latin-speaking people

• non-European

• non-civil-service position

(10) Over and under words are usually one word except when the compound contains the

word the.

• overdone steak

• underdone steak

• understaffed office

• over-the-counter drug

• under-the-table kick

(11) Quasi words are always hyphenated.

• quasi-judicial

• quasi-public

• quasi-legislative

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(12) Self as a prefix is joined to the root word by a hyphen. When self is the root word or

is used as a suffix, do not use a hyphen.

• self-made

• self-respect

• self-explanatory

• selfish

• herself

• himself

• selfless

• itself

• myself

(13) Vice compounds are hyphenated except when used to show a single office or title.

• a vice president; vice-presidential candidate

• vice admiral; vice-admiralty

• the vice-consul; vice-consulate’s office

• vice-chancellor; vice-chancellorship

(14) Well compounds are hyphenated when used as an adjective before a noun; drop the

hyphen when used following the noun. Well used as a compound noun is always

hyphenated.

• well-made suit; suit was well made

• the well-being of the family; consider her well-being

• well-known author; author is well known

• the well-bred dogs; the dogs were well bred

(15) Wide words are usually one word except when long and cumbersome and when

follows the noun.

• worldwide

• university-wide; the virus is university wide

Spacing when using a hyphen

• No space before or after to combine words, punctuation and/or numbers.

• One space after when dividing a word (see rule 1) or using suspended hyphen (rule 5).

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Dividing Words

1. Never divide the last word on the first or last lines on a page; do not hyphenate the last

words on two consecutive lines; avoid hyphenating more than five lines each page.

2. Never divide monosyllables (one-syllable words). [friend]

3. Never divide words at a vowel that forms a syllable in the middle of the word.

[preju-/dice, not prej-/udice]

4. Never divide words at a final syllable whose only vowel sound is that of a syllabic “I.”

[prin-/cipal, not princi-/pals]

5. Never divide words of five or fewer letters even when they contain more than one

syllable. [not i-/deal or ide-/a]

6. Never divide words by putting a single letter on a line. [not a-/round nor militar-/y]

7. Never further divide words that contain a hyphen—break these words at the built-in

hyphen. [self-/control, not self-con-/trol]

8. Divide words containing double consonants between the consonants only when they do

not end root words. [permit-/ted; spell-/ing]

9. When possible, divide words after the prefix or before the suffix rather than within the

root word or within the prefix or suffix. [applic-/able, not applica-/ble; valu-/able,

not val-/uable; pre-/requisite, not prereq-/uisite].

10. Never divide contractions. [not can’/t nor won/’t]

11. When necessary to divide a name, carry over only the surname (never separate a first

name from a middle initial, an initial from a middle name or initials used in place of a

first name). [Annette G./Walker; Ethel/Hall; R. A./Bowe]

12. Divide surnames, abbreviations and numbers only if they already contain a hyphen, and

then divide only at the hyphen. [Johnson-/Roberts, not John-/son-Roberts; AFL-/CIO,

not YM/CA; 249-/3513, not $55,-/000].

13. A person’s rank or title should be on the same line with first name or initials, when

possible. [Miss Duncan/Phillips; Dr. Louise/Miller-Knight; Major Larry/Lee]

14. When it is necessary to divide a date, separate the year from month—do not separate the

month from the day.

Dividing Paragraphs

1. Never divide a paragraph of four or fewer lines.

2. When dividing a paragraph of five or more lines between two pages, each page must have

at least two lines of text.

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Italics

1. Use italics in printed material to distinguish the titles of whole published works: books,

bulletins, pamphlets, periodicals, newspapers, plays, movies, symphonies, poems, operas, essays,

lectures, sermons, legal cases and reports. For title plurals, the plural ending is not italicized.

(e.g., “There were five Journals on the shelf.” The “s” in “Journals” is not italicized.)

• The Chicago Manual of Style

• The Phantom of the Opera

• AFMAN 33-326, Preparing Official Communications

• Star Trek

• The Montgomery Advertiser

• Miranda v. Arizona

2. Use italics in place of the underscore to distinguish or give greater prominence to certain

words, phrases, or sentences. Both the underscore and italics are acceptable, but not in the

same document. Use sparingly.

• Air Force doctrine has been the subject of much debate.

3. Use italics in printed material to distinguish the names of ships, submarines, aircraft,

and spacecraft. Italicize the name only, not initials or numbers preceding or following the

name. (In typed material, the underscore is generally used for this purpose.) Do not italicize the

class or make of ships, aircraft and spacecraft; and names of space programs.

• USS America

• Nautilus

• B-1B Lancer

• Friendship 7

• Columbia

• frigate

• U-boat

• Spruance

• Boeing 707

• Gemini II

4. Use italics in typed material to distinguish foreign words not part of the English

language. Once an expression has become part of the English language (in the dictionary),

italics is unnecessary.

• vakfiye

• poêle

• le cheval

• Luftwaffe

• blitzkrieg

• Perestroika

• vis-à-vis

• com d´étet

5. Use italics for punctuation (except parentheses and brackets) marks that immediately

follow the italicized word, letter character or symbol.

• What is meant by random selection?

• Point: one-twelfth of a pica

Italics

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Parentheses

1. Use parentheses to enclose explanatory material (a single word, a phrase or an entire

sentence) that is independent of the main thought of the sentence.

• The ACSC students (542 of them) will begin classes the second week of June.

• The results (see figure 3) were surprising.

2. Use parentheses to set off nonessential elements when commas would be inappropriate

or confusing and dashes would be too emphatic.

• Mr. Henry Anderson, Jr., is the general manager of the Montgomery (Alabama) branch.

[Parentheses are clearer than commas when a city-state expression is used as an

adjective.]

• All the classes will meet three days a week (Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays).

[Parentheses are used in place of commas because the nonessential element contains

commas.]

• I suggest you contact Edward Clinton (a true professional) for his recommendation.

[Parentheses used in place of dashes to de-emphasize the nonessential element.]

• Contact Ms. Louise Robinson—the manager of the house in Tuscaloosa—and ask her if a

room is still available. [Dashes are used in place of parentheses for emphasis.]

3. Use parentheses to enclose enumerating letters or numerals within a sentence.

• Our goals are to (1) reduce the number of curriculum hours, (2) eliminate the 90-minute

lunch period, and (3) reduce the number of personnel needed to accomplish the mission.

• Also, include the following when you file your medical costs: (a) hotel charges, (b) meal

costs (including gratuities), and (c) transportation costs.

4. Use parentheses to set off or enclose numbers or letters identifying specific levels of an

outline. Recall the cardinal rule of outlining: any topic that is divided must have at least two

parts. Every “1” must have a “2” and every “a” must have a “b” (and so forth) for every

level/sublevel. Refer to chapter 6 for detailed outline examples.

5. Use parentheses (or quotation marks) to enclose a nickname or a descriptive expression

when it falls between a person’s first and last names. When it precedes or replaces a person’s

first name, simply capitalize it.

• George Herman (Babe) Ruth

• Major William F. (Clark) Kent

• Stonewall Jackson

• the Iron Duke

6. Using parentheses along with other punctuation

a. If an item in parentheses falls within a sentence, place comma, semicolon, colon, or

dash outside (never before) the closing parenthesis.

• I’ll see you later (probably Friday), but remember to collect your money.

( )

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• I’ll attend the meeting (as I said I would); however, you’ll have to go to the

next one as I have another commitment.

• She’s passionate about two important issues (and strives to support them):

homeless children and a clean environment.

b. Use a period before a closing parenthesis only when the parenthetical sentence

stands on its own or when the closing parenthesis is preceded by an abbreviation

containing punctuation.

• The results were surprising. (See the analysis at atch 2.)

• Many flower heights (e.g., 6 in., 12 in., 36 in.) will be featured in the show.

c. Put a question mark or quotation mark before a closing parenthesis only when it

applies to the parenthetical item and the sentence ends in a different punctuation.

• The Pentagon (you’ve been there, haven’t you?) is a fascinating building.

• Doris Williams said she would go. (In fact, her exact words were, “Go

golfing? You bet! Every chance I get!”)

d. When using an exclamation mark or question mark to emphasize or draw attention

to a particular word within a sentence.

• You call this fresh(!) food.

• They said they will buy us four(?) machines.

Spacing when using parentheses (Opening parenthesis)

• One space before when parenthetic matter is within a sentence.

• No space before when using exclamation or question marks to emphasize or draw

attention to a particular word within a sentence.

• Two spaces before when parenthetic matter follows a sentence (when parenthetic matter

starts with a capital and closes with its own sentence punctuation)—unless manuscript

format and using right justified, then one space before.

• No space after.

Spacing when using parentheses (Closing parenthesis)

• No space before.

• One space after when parenthetic matter is within a sentence.

• Two spaces after when parenthetic matter is itself a complete sentence and another

sentence follows—unless manuscript format and using right justified, then one space

after.

• No space after if another punctuation mark immediately follows.

• The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable.

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Period

1. Use a period to end declarative and imperative sentences.

• Declarative: His work is highly satisfactory.

• Imperative: Don’t be late.

2. Use a period to end an indirect question or a question intended as a suggestion or

otherwise not requiring an answer.

• She wanted to know how to do it.

• He asked what the job would entail.

3. Use a period with certain abbreviations; however, some abbreviations are written without

punctuation—check your local command style guide. (NOTE: “Miss” is not an abbreviation.)

• Mr.

• Mrs.

• Ms.

• Dr.

• Sr.

• Jr.

• i.e.

• e.g.

• etc.

• in. [inch vs. the word in]

• no. [number vs. the word no]

4. Use a period to form ellipses (three periods that indicate a pause or faltering speech

within a sentence, or an omission of a portion of quoted material). Refer to the ellipsis

section of this chapter for more information.

5. Use a period after each item in a vertical list/outline when at least one of the items is a

complete sentence.

• After listening intently to the defense attorney’s closing remarks, the jury was convinced

of three things:

o Witnesses lied.

o False evidence had been presented.

o The defendant deserved a new trial.

• After listening to the defense attorney’s closing remarks, the jury was convinced that

o several witnesses had perjured themselves,

o false evidence was presented and

o the defendant deserved a new trial.

6. Do not use a period in a vertical list/outline when the list completes the sentence begun

in the introductory element unless the items in the list are separated by other punctuation.

The following fighter aircraft were lined up on the runway for the airshow:

• F-16

• F-35

• F-22

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7. Use periods after numbers and letters in an outline when the letters and figures are not

enclosed in parentheses (such as in the numbered and lettered paragraphs of this chapter).

Recall the cardinal rule of outlining: any topic that is divided must have at least two parts.

Every “1” must have a “2” and every “a” must have a “b” (and so forth) for every level/sublevel.

See chapter 6 for detailed outline examples.

Example

1. Main point 1

a. First supporting evidence

b. Second supporting evidence

(1) First detailed support

(2) Second detailed support

(a) First additional support

(b) Second additional support

2. Main point 2

6. Using a period with parenthetical phrases. Place a period inside the final parenthesis only

when the item in the parentheses is a separate sentence or when the final word in the

parenthetical phrase is an abbreviation that is followed by a period.

• I waited in line for 3 hours. (One other time I waited for over 5 hours.)

• One other committee member (namely, Dr. Glen Jones, Sr.) plans to vote against the

amendment.

7. Using a period with quotation marks: period placed inside a closing quotation mark.

She said, “I’ll go with you.”

8. Using a period with a dash only when used with an abbreviation that contains periods.

Tony Lamar’s desk is 48 in.—his is the only odd-sized desk.

Spacing when using a period

• Two spaces after the end of a sentence.

• No space before unless an ellipsis.

• One space after an abbreviation with a period within a sentence.

• No space after a decimal point or before within two numbers.

• No space after when another punctuation mark immediately follows (closing quotation

mark, closing parenthesis, comma following an “abbreviation” period).

• Two spaces after a number or letter that indicates an enumeration (rule 5b).

• The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable.

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Question Mark

1. Use a question mark to indicate the end of a direct question.

• Did he go with you?

• Will you be able to attend?

2. Use a question mark with elliptical (shortened) questions and to express more than one

question within a sentence.

• You rang? For what purpose?

• Was the speaker interesting? Convincing? Well versed?

• Who approved the sale? When? To whom? For what amount?

3. Use a question mark after an independent question within a larger sentence.

• The question “Who will absorb the costs?” went unanswered.

• When will the reorganization take place? will surely be asked.

4. Use a question mark to express doubt.

• They plan to purchase three(?) new Pentium computers with individual scanners for us.

• Jackie Baltzell and Gayle Magill have been associated with her since 1990(?).

5. Use a question mark before a closing parenthesis only when it applies solely to the

parenthetical item and the sentence ends in a different punctuation mark.

• At our next meeting (it’s on the 16th, isn’t it?), we’ll elect a new president. As the gun

opened fire (was it a .50-caliber gun?), all movement ceased. [Question marks were used

within parentheses because sentences require a period at the end.]

• Are tickets still available (and can I get two), or is it too late? [Question mark is omitted

within parentheses because sentence ends with a question mark.]

6. A question mark is placed inside the closing quotation mark only when it applies to the

quoted material or when the same punctuation is required for both the quotation and the

sentence as a whole.

• She asked, “Did you enjoy the trip?” [Question mark belongs with quoted material.]

• Why did he ask, “When does it start?” [Question mark is same as ending punctuation.]

• Did you say, “I’ll help out”? [Quoted material is not a question; therefore, question mark

applies to the sentence as a whole.]

7. When a question within a sentence is set off by dashes, place the question mark before

the closing dash.

The new class—isn’t it called Super Seminar?—begins tomorrow.

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Spacing when using a question mark…

• Two spaces after the end of a sentence—unless manuscript format and using right

justified, then one space after.

• No space after when another punctuation mark immediately follows (closing quotation

mark, closing parenthesis, closing dash).

• The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable.

Quotation Marks

1. Use quotation marks to enclose the exact words of a speaker or writer. With few

exceptions, a quotation must be copied exactly as it appears in the original. If the quotation is

woven into the flow of the sentence, do not use punctuation preceding the opening quotation

mark. When words interrupt a quotation, close and reopen the quotation.

• Robert Frost said, “The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment

you get up in the morning and doesn’t stop until you get to the office.”

• Why does she insist on saying “It just won’t work”?

• “A pint of sweat” says General George S. Patton, “will save a gallon of blood.”

• NOTE: Do not use quotation marks to set off an indirect quotation.

Why does she insist on saying that it just won’t work?

2. Use quotation marks to enclose slogans or mottoes, but not signs or notices.

• He had a “do or die” attitude.

• “Live and let live” is a common phrase.

• He has a No Smoking sign in his car.

• There is a Gone Fishing notice on his door.

3. Use quotation marks to enclose words or phrases used to indicate humor, slang, irony or

poor grammar.

• They serve “fresh” seafood all right—fresh from the freezer!

• For whatever reason, she just “ain’t talkin’.”

NOTE: When using quotation marks with other punctuation, the comma and period

are always placed inside the closing quotation marks; the semicolon is always placed

outside the closing quotation marks; the dash, exclamation mark and question mark

are placed according to the structure of the sentence.

“ ”

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4. Use quotation marks with words and phrases that are introduced by such expressions as

cited as, classified, designated, entitled, labeled, marked, named, signed, the term, or the word

when the exact text is quoted. Capitalize the first word when it begins a sentence, when it was

capitalized in the original, when it represents a complete sentence, or when it is a proper noun.

• The card was signed “Your friend, Diane.”

• The article was entitled “How to Write English That is Alive.”

• “Fragile” was stamped on the outside of the package.

• The report is classified “secret” and can’t be distributed.

NOTE: Do not enclose these expressions: called, known as, so-called, etc.

o The flower was called an American Beauty rose.

o The boy whose name is “Bill Kent” was known as Clark Kent.

o The so-called secret report can now be distributed.

5. To enclose the title of any part (chapter, lesson, topic, section, article, heading) of a

published work (book, play, speech, symphony, etc.). The title of the published work should

be italicized in word processor files and printed materials; titles are underlined only if typed

using a manual typewriter.

• Air Force Doctrine Annex 1-1, Force Development, has an appendix entitled

“Institutional Competency List.”

• When you read “Documents Standards” section of The Tongue and Quill, recall…

6. Use quotation marks to enclose titles of complete but unpublished works such as

manuscripts, dissertations and reports.

• We need to read the “The Evolution of a Revolt” report as soon as possible.

• The title of his dissertation is “Impacts of Banning Smoking from Public Places.”

7. Use quotation marks to enclose the titles of songs and radio and television shows.

• They sang “The Star Spangled Banner” before the game began.

• “M.A.S.H.” is still being shown on TV.

8. Use quotation marks to denote inches.

6” × 15” [Use inch ( " ) mark and multiplication (×) mark if using typewriter or

computer that has these keys.]

9. Use quotation marks (or parentheses) to enclose a nickname or descriptive expression

when it falls between a person’s first and last names. However, when it precedes or

replaces a person’s first name, simply capitalize it.

• George Herman “Babe” Ruth

• Major William F. “Clark” Kent

• the Iron Duke

• Stonewall Jackson

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10. Use quotation marks to enclose misnomers, slang expressions, nickname, coined words

or ordinary words used in an arbitrary way.

• His report was “bunk.”

• The “invisible government” is responsible.

Spacing when using quotation marks (Opening mark)

• Two spaces before when quoted matter starts a new sentence or follows a colon—unless

manuscript format and using right justified, then one space before.

• No space before when a dash or an opening parenthesis precedes.

• One space before in all other cases.

• No space after.

Spacing when using quotation marks (Closing mark)

• No space before.

• Two spaces after when quoted matter ends the sentence—unless manuscript format and

using right justified, then one space after (see page 302, spacing).

• No space after when another punctuation mark immediately follows (semicolon, colon).

• One space after in all other cases.

Semicolon

1. Use a semicolon to separate independent clauses not connected by a coordinating

conjunction (and, but, for, or, nor and so), and in statements too closely related in meaning

to be written as separate sentences.

• The students were ready; it was time to go.

• War is destructive; peace, constructive.

2. Use a semicolon before transitional words/phrases (accordingly, as a result, besides,

consequently, for example, furthermore, hence, however, moreover, namely, nevertheless, on

the contrary, otherwise, that is, then, therefore, thus, and yet) when connecting two complete

but related thoughts and a coordinating conjunction is not used. Follow these words/phrases

with a comma. Do not use a comma after hence, then, thus, so and yet unless a pause is needed.

• Our expenses have increased; however, we haven’t raised our prices.

• Our expenses have increased, however, and we haven’t raised our prices.

• The decision has been made; therefore, there’s no point in discussing it further.

• The decision has been made so there’s no point in discussing it.

• The general had heard the briefing before; thus, he chose not to attend.

;

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3. Use a semicolon to separate items in a series that contain commas (when confusion

would otherwise result).

• If you want your writing to be worthwhile, organize it; if you want it to be easy to read,

use simple words and phrases; and, if you want it to be interesting, vary your sentence

and paragraph lengths.

• Those who attended the meeting were Martha Brown, Dean of Education; Colonels

David Jones, Dean of Distance Learning; Samantha White, Chairman of Leadership and

Communications Studies; and Todd Walker, Chairman of Joint Warfare Studies.

4. Use a semicolon to precede words or abbreviations that introduce a summary or

explanation of what has gone before in the sentence.

• We visited several countries on that trip; i.e., England, Ireland, France, and Germany.

• There are many things you must arrange before leaving on vacation; for example, mail

pickup, pet care and yard care.

Spacing when using a semicolon

• No space before.

• One space after.

Summary

The punctuation usage guide is a starting point. Using the proper punctuation conveys direction

for your readers; it helps your message convey the impact, significance, emotion and even the

breaks between thoughts and ideas. It is not difficult to use the proper punctuation; start with the

basics and grow your skill as your other communications skills grow.

CHAPTER 26

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CHAPTER 26:

Abbreviations

This chapter covers:

• Definition and implications

• Types of abbreviations

• General guidelines

• Common abbreviations

• Researcher’s guide to abbreviations

Several prior chapters provided specific tips to improve your prose through better drafting

(chapter 6), editing (chapter 7), format choice (chapter 16) and writing better bullet statements

(chapter 19). One challenge that persists, especially in written communications, is the tension

between the number of words (length) and meaning. Anyone familiar with texting and social

media understands this tension between time and space. With more words you can convey more

meaning but the time required to read more—and the space required to carry the meaning—are

limited. For example, recent changes to the officer and enlisted evaluation forms have reduced

the amount of space to record individual accomplishments. As such, the need to convey more

meaning in less space is highly important: we need to keep our messages short.

Definition and Implications

What is an abbreviation? The definition and implications may surprise you.

Ab-bre-vi-a-tion (noun) \ə-,bre-ve-’a-shən\: a shortened form of a word or name

that is used in place of the full word or name

–Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary (2014)

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This definition is broad and implies the need for further information about the types, forms and

appropriate uses for abbreviations in Air Force documents. If you have ever had any of the

following questions, you understand the need for more information:

• What are the types of abbreviations?

• What’s the appropriate abbreviation for a specific word?

• Can I use abbreviations in this document? If so, what types are allowed?

• How is the abbreviation written—all uppercase, all lowercase or a combination of both?

• Can I use just the abbreviation or must I spell it out?

• How do I make an abbreviation plural—add an s, or an ’s?

Though these questions are insignificant when compared with the issues facing the Air Force and

the nation, the ability to communicate clearly—with or without abbreviations—remains an

essential skill for all Air Force personnel. Answers to these questions begin by understanding

the types of abbreviations. Which type to use is driven by two principles—the formality of the

document and clearly conveying meaning. In general, use the shortest form of the word

appropriate for the document that clearly conveys the meaning.

Types of Abbreviations

Abbreviations appear in Air Force documents in many forms to include acronyms, brevity codes,

contractions and truncations. With the growth of technology there has been an explosive growth

in the forms of abbreviations and the number of common abbreviations in use. The sections that

follow cover only a few examples for each so that you can recognize the types and know how to

apply the general guidelines for their use in the official forms, letters and papers you prepare.

Single Letter/Few Letter Abbreviations

Single letter/few letter abbreviations are exactly what the label suggests: words that are

represented by a single or just a few important letters. Examples include “n.” for noun, “gov.”

for government, “ltd.” for limited, or “ID” for identification. According to the Encyclopedia

Britannica online, “these abbreviations are usually spoken as the whole word they represent.”

Acronyms

Acronyms are pronounceable words formed by combining the initial letter(s) of the words that

make up the complete term. Most acronyms are written in all caps without punctuation, but

some are so commonly used they are now considered words in their own right.

• AAFES (Army and Air Force Exchange Service)

• laser (light amplification by stimulated emission of radiation)

• NATO (North Atlantic Treaty Organization)

• radar (radio detection and ranging)

• scuba (self-contained underwater breathing apparatus)

• ZIP code (Zone Improvement Plan code)

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The English language uses acronyms so frequently that the original full term is no longer needed

to convey meaning, such as with laser, radar and scuba. This is not the case with brevity codes

as they tend to be very specific to life and work experiences.

Brevity Codes (a.k.a. “Initialisms”)

A brevity code is a combination of letters—pronounced letter by letter—designed to shorten a

phrase, sentence or group of sentences. Outside the military, brevity codes are known as

initialisms. While many brevity codes/initialisms are widely known, each working community

or military specialty tends to build a language of its own with brevity codes. Fortunately, most

official forms have a place dedicated for spelling out brevity codes. When used within the text

of documents, brevity codes should be written out fully on first use followed by the brevity code

in parentheses as shown, below. Also, when brevity codes begin with b, c, d, g, j, k, p, q, t, u, v,

w, y, or z, the indefinite article a is used. With a, e, f, h, i, l, m, n, o, r, s, or x, use an.

• ABU (Airmen’s Battle Uniform)

• BX (Base Exchange)

• CFC (Combined Federal Campaign)

• DoD (Department of Defense)

• NCO (Non-Commissioned Officer)

• PCS (permanent change of station)

• POW (prisoner of war)

• TDY (temporary duty)

• UOD (uniform of the day)

Contractions

Contractions differ from both acronyms and brevity codes in that contractions are shortened

forms of words in which an apostrophe indicates the deletion of letters. Contractions are

common in informal work but should not be used in formal, professional work unless needed to

convey a distinct personal tone, such as in a letter or an e-mail to a specific person or group.

• can’t (cannot)

• don’t (do not)

• I’ll (I will)

• I’m (I am)

• I’ve (I have)

• isn’t (is not)

• it’s (it is)

• let’s (let us)

• mustn’t (must not)

• they’re (they are)

• we’re (we are)

• won’t (will not)

• wouldn’t (would not)

• you’ve (you have)

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General Guidelines

Regardless of the form of the abbreviation, the following general guidelines are useful in helping

you determine how, when and where to use abbreviations. The guidelines that follow are not

comprehensive or directive—but they are a good place to start. In general, use the shortest

abbreviation allowable for the document that clearly conveys the desired meaning.

Using Abbreviations

• Use abbreviations in informal documents, manuals, reference books, business and legal

documents, scholarly footnotes, etc., when needed to save space.

• Use only approved abbreviations for formal/official documents, such as performance

evaluations and award nomination forms.

• Spell out the acronym or brevity code the first time it is used. If a large section of text

occurs between uses, write it out again to remind readers of its meaning.

• When used, use abbreviations sparingly, correctly and consistently.

Instances to Limit or Avoid Using Abbreviations

• Avoid beginning a sentence with an abbreviation (except Mr., Mrs., Ms., Dr.), acronym

or brevity code.

• Avoid using contractions in formal documents when style, elegance and formality are

important. Use acronyms and brevity codes sparingly in formal documents or provide a

glossary that defines all acronyms and brevity codes used in the document.

• Avoid using abbreviations of all types in main headings.

• Avoid using words that are offensive, profane or repulsive when assigning acronyms,

brevity codes and contractions.

• In formal writing “United States” is a noun (The United States is a leading producer of

several grains); “US” is an adjective (US policy regarding energy).

• When using an abbreviation, use a figure to express the quantity in a unit of measure

(without a hyphen in a unit modifier). [3 mi, 55 mph, 50 lb, 33 mm film]

Specific Abbreviation Forms and Formats

• Write abbreviations “first,” “second,” “third,” “fourth,” etc., as 1st, 2d, 3d, 4th, etc.

• Use the shortest form when there’s a choice between the abbreviated form and the

contraction form. [gov vs gov’t]

• Write all abbreviations without punctuation unless confusion would result.

[The abbreviation for inch (in.) might be confused with the word in, the abbreviation for

number (no.) might be confused with the word no, etc.]

• Write abbreviations for single words in lowercase letters.

[hospital–hosp; letter–ltr]

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• Use the same abbreviation for singular and plural forms after spelling it out.

[area of responsibility (AOR)–areas of responsibility (AOR)]

• When ambiguity could result, form the plural with a lowercase s and never use an

apostrophe to form the plural. [letters–ltrs; travel requests–TRs;

area of operations–AO; areas of operations–AOs]

• Do not cap the words just because the acronym or brevity code is capped. Check a

source book, the library or the office of responsibility for the correct form. [OJT–on the

job training; OPSEC–operations security; JIPC–joint imagery production complex; JCS–

Joint Chiefs of Staff]

Bottom Line: If in doubt, spell it out.

• Contact the office of primary responsibility for the proper use of abbreviations when

writing articles, manuals, handouts, instructions, performance reports, award citations and

narratives, and unit histories.

• Find out if your organization has any style preferences regarding abbreviations and use it.

Otherwise, consult the latest dictionary or use the Joint Publication 1-02, Department of

Defense Dictionary of Military and Associated Terms, for terms and definitions.

Common Abbreviations

Days

Sunday

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Sun

Mon

Tues

Wed

Thurs

Fri

Sat

Months

Most Air Force writing uses the common abbreviates for the months of the year. However,

official biographies use the Associated Press (AP) form (see chapter 20). The difference

between the forms is that all months with five or fewer letters are always spelled in AP form.

Stated differently, the months of March, April, May, June, and July are always spelled out

completely in AP form.

January

February

March

April

May

June

Common

Jan

Feb

Mar

Apr

May

Jun

Jan

Feb

March

April

May

June

July

August

September

October

November

December

Common

Jul

Aug

Sep

Oct

Nov

Dec

July

Aug

Sep

Oct

Nov

Dec

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Years

Years are abbreviated by using only the last two digits when used as part of a date or with an

apostrophe when used to denote a year group or graduation year. The last two digits of a year

may also be combined with an acronym to denote specific annual events such as fiscal or

academic years.

• Used as a date: In the date 10 Nov 14 the number 14 is the abbreviation for 2014.

• Used as a year group: The ’05 year group for the 2005 year group.

• Used as a graduation year: The Class of ’12 for the Class of 2012.

• Used with an acronym: FY14 for fiscal year 2014; AY14 for academic year 2013-2014.

State and Possession Abbreviations

State

Unites State Postal Service

Common

Alabama

Ala.

Alaska*

Alaska

Arizona

Ariz.

Arkansas

Ark.

California

Calif.

Colorado

Colo.

Connecticut

Conn.

Delaware

Del.

Florida

Fla.

Georgia

Ga.

Hawaii*

Hawaii

Idaho*

Idaho

Illinois

Ill.

Indiana

Ind.

Iowa*

Iowa

Kansas

Kans.

Kan.

Kentucky

Ky.

Louisiana

La.

Maine*

Maine

Maryland

Md.

Massachusetts

Mass.

Michigan

Mich.

Minnesota

Minn.

Mississippi

Miss.

Missouri

Mo.

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State

Unites State Postal Service

Common

Montana

Mont.

Nebraska

Nebr.

Neb.

Nevada

Nev.

New Hampshire

N.H.

New Jersey

N.J.

New Mexico

NMex.

N.M.

New York

N.Y.

North Carolina

N.C.

North Dakota

NDak.

N.D.

Ohio*

Ohio

Oklahoma

Okla.

Oregon

Oreg.

Ore.

Pennsylvania

Pa.

Rhode Island

R.I.

South Carolina

S.C.

South Dakota

SDak.

S.D.

Tennessee

Tenn.

Texas*

Tex.

Texas

Utah*

Utah

Vermont

Vt.

Virginia

Va.

Washington

Wash.

West Virginia

WVa.

W.Va.

Wisconsin

Wis.

Wyoming

Wyo.

American Samoa

District of Columbia

Federated States of Micronesia

Guam

Marshall Islands

Northern Mariana Islands

Palau

Puerto Rico

Virgin Islands

* In AP style, Alaska, Hawaii, Idaho, Iowa, Maine, Ohio, Texas and Utah are always spelled out.

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Other Air Force Abbreviations

Within the Air Force there are many types of workplaces, and they are organized into one or

more major categories. These categories include major command (MAJCOM), numbered air

force (NAF), direct reporting unit (DRU), and field operating agency (FOA). For example,

Pacific Air Forces (PACAF) and Air Combat Command (ACC) are major commands; Ninth Air

Force (9 AF) and 24th Air Force (24 AF) are numbered air forces; the United States Air Force

Academy (USAFA) is a direct reporting unit; and the Air Force Personnel Center (AFPC) is a

field operating agency. The full list of MAJCOMs, NAFs, DRUs, etc., can be found on the

public Air Force website at http://www.af.mil/AFSites.aspx.

Phonetic Alphabet

The military version of the phonetic alphabet is presented here as a tool to help verbalize the

spelling of acronyms and other abbreviations verbally.

Alpha

Hotel

Oscar

Victor

Bravo

India

Papa

Whiskey

Charlie

Juliet

Quebec

X-ray

Delta

Kilo

Romeo

Yankee

Echo

Lima

Sierra

Zulu

Foxtrot

Mike

Tango

Golf

November

Uniform

Academic Degrees

There are numerous academic degree titles and each has at least one common abbreviation. With

the growth of specialized studies there has been growth in the number of specialized degree

titles. The important point regarding academic degrees is to understand the level of study—

undergraduate (associates and bachelors) or graduate (masters and doctoral)—and the field of

study. For example, you would not want to see a doctor for illness unless the person holds a

doctorate degree in the appropriate medical field. Some general examples are listed below.

• Associates Degrees: Associate of Arts (AA); Associate of Science (AS)

• Bachelor’s Degrees: Bachelor of Arts (BA); Bachelor of Science (BS)

• Master’s Degrees: Master of Arts (MA); Master of Science (MS)

• Doctor of Philosophy (PhD); Juris Doctor (JD); Medical Doctor (MD)

Secondary Address Unit Indicators

Use secondary address unit indicators to save space within the limited area available for the

address on envelopes and letters, such as these common secondary address unit indicators:

• Apartment–APT

• Floor–FL

• Building–BLDG

• Room–RM

• Department–DEPT

• Suite–STE

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Latin Abbreviations

Abbreviation

Full Latin Term

Meaning

A.M.

ante meridiem

before noon

c. or ca

circa

about, approximately

e.g.

exempli gratia

for example, for instance

et al.

et allii, et alia

and other people/things

etc.

et cetera

and so on, and other things

ib, ibid.

ibidem

in the same place

i.e.

id est

that is to say

loc. cit.

loco citato

in the place cited/mentioned

op. cit.

opere citato

in the work cited/mentioned before

P.M.

post meridiem

after noon

P.S.

post scriptum

after writing

Pro tem.

pro tempore

for the time, temporarily

Q.E.D.

quod erat demonstrandum

which was to be shown

Sc.

sic

thus used, spelt, etc.

v.,

versus

vs. against

v.v.

vice versa

the other way around

Units of Measure

• Degrees Celsius–°C

• Kilometer–km

• Degrees Fahrenheit–°F

• Mile–mi

• Foot–ft

• miles per hour–mph

• Gallon–gal

• Millimeter–mm

• Hertz–hz

• nautical miles–NM

• Inch–in.

• pounds per square inch–psi

• Kilogram–kg

• revolutions per minute–rpm

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Researcher’s Guide to Abbreviations

app

appendix

l (el)

line (plural: ll) [not recommended

because the abbreviation in the singular

might be mistaken for “one” and the

plural for “eleven”]

art

article (plural: arts)

not, footnote (plural: nn)

born

no date

book (plural: bks)

no.

number (plural: nos)

no place; no publisher

circa, about, approximately

new series

confer, compare [confer is Latin for

“compare”: cf must not be used as the

abbreviation for the English “confer,” nor

should cf be use to mean “see”)

op cit

opere citato, in the work cited

chapter (in legal references only)

old series

chap

chapter (plural: chaps)

page (plural: pp) [it always precedes the

numbers; when “p” follows a number, it

can stand for “pence”]

col

column (plural: cols)

para

Paragraph (plural: pars)

comp

complier (plural: comps); complied by

passim

here and there

died

part (plural: pts)

dept

department (plural: depts)

quod vide, which see (for use with

cross-references

div

division (plural: divs)

scene

e.g.

exempli gratia, for example

(do not use with “etc.”)

sec

section (plural: secs)

edition, edited by editor (plural: eds)

[sic]

so, thus; show erroneous material

intentionally kept in text

et al

et alii, and others

sup

supplement (plural: sups)

seq

et sequens, and the following

supra

above

etc.

et cetera, and so forth

sub verbo, sub voce, under the word

(for use in references to listing in

encyclopedias and dictionaries)

fig

figure (plural: figs)

trans

translator, translated by

flourit flourished (for use when birth and

death dates are not known)

verse (plural: vv)

i.e.

id est, that is (use with etc.)

viz

videlicet, namely

ibid

ibidem, in the same place

vol

volume (plural: vols)

idem, the same (refers to persons, except in

law citations; not to be confused with ibid)

versus, against (v in law references)

infra

below

CHAPTER 27

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CHAPTER 27:

Capitalization

This chapter covers:

• General Capitalization Guidelines

• Specific Capitalization Guidelines

General Capitalization Guidelines

Air Force writers and reviewers spend an excessive amount of time trying to determine the

appropriate use of capital letters (and abbreviations and numbers, as well). The reason for using

capital letters is to give distinction or add importance to certain words or phrases, but style

guides and command preferences differ. If someone else is signing the document, that person

has the last word. The best advice we can give you is to find out what style your organization

prefers and use that style consistently.

One thing we can all agree on is that we are Airmen with a capital “A.” Our doctrine now

defines Airman to include all officers and enlisted personnel, regardless of rank, component

(regular, reserve, or guard), or specialty, and all Department of the Air Force civilians.

Although we can’t possibly cover every situation, what follows is designed to provide some

measure of consistency within the Air Force. You must ensure consistency within everything

you write or type. A word of caution: When you’re preparing Air Force publications,

performance reports, forms/IMTs, awards or other unique packages, consult the appropriate

manuals or the office of primary responsibility to determine their unique requirements such as

Joint Publication 1-02, Department of Defense Dictionary of Military and Associated Terms.

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Specific Capitalization Guidelines

The general guidance for capitalization provided in the previous section is intentionally brief to

set the stage for the specific capitalization guidance provided below.

First Words

1. Capitalize the first word…

a. of every sentence.

• Twenty-one people attended the secret presentation given by the chief of staff.

• Many government employees were furloughed in 2002 and again in 2013.

b. of every sentence fragment treated as a complete sentence.

• Really? No! So much for that.

• More discussion. No agreement. Another hour wasted.

c. of direct questions and quotations placed within a sentence even if quotation marks

are not used.

• The commander asked this question: How many of you are volunteers?

• The order read “Attack at dawn.”

d. of items shown in a list (using numbers, letters or display dots) when a complete

sentence introduces them.

The commander listed the following responsibilities of liaison officers:

• Become familiar with the situation.

• Know the mission.

• Arrange for communications.

e. in the salutation (e.g., “Dear Mrs. Smith”) and complimentary closing (e.g.,

“Sincerely” or “Respectfully yours”) of a letter.

f. after a hyphen when the hyphenated word is followed by a proper noun or adjective

(e.g., “non-English speaking people”).

g. after a colon when the

(1) word is a proper noun (e.g., “Two courses are required: English and

Economics.”) or the pronoun I (e.g., “Everyone else went shopping: I stayed in

the car.”).

(2) word is the first word of a quoted sentence (e.g., “When asked to explain the

difference between a sofa and a love seat, the boy said: ‘I don’t know, ma’am,

because you don’t put your feet on either one.’”).

(3) expression after the colon is a complete sentence that is the dominant or more

general element (e.g., “A key principle: Nonessential elements are set off by

commas; essential elements are not set off.”).

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(4) material following the colon consists of two or more sentences (e.g., “There are

several drawbacks to this: First, it ties up our capital for three years. Second, the

likelihood of a great return on our investment is questionable.”).

(5) material following the colon starts on a new line.

They gave us two reasons:

1. They received the order too late.

2. It was Friday and nothing could be done until Monday.

(6) material preceding the colon is an introductory word such as NOTE, CAUTION,

WANTED, HINT or REMEMBER (e.g., WANTED: Three editorial assistants

who know computers as well as editing and typesetting.).

h. each line in a poem. (Always follow the style of the poem, however).

I used to write quite poorly.

My boss said it made him ill.

But now he’s feeling better

‘Cuz I use The Tongue and Quill!

–TSgt Keyes

2. Do not capitalize the first word…

a. of a sentence enclosed in parentheses within another sentence unless the first word is

a proper noun, the pronoun I, the first word of a quoted sentence, or begins a

complete parenthetical sentence standing alone.

• The company finally moved (they were to have vacated 2 months ago) to another

location.

• One of our secretaries (Jan Smith) will record the minutes of today’s meeting.

• This is the only tree in our yard that survived the ice storm. (It’s a pecan tree.)

b. when it is part of a quotation slogan or motto if it is not capitalized in the original

quotation (e.g., General MacArthur said that old soldiers “just fade away.”).

c. shown in enumeration (running text or list format) when completing the sentence that

introduces them (running text example–“Liaison officers must 1) become familiar

with the situation, 2) know the mission and 3) arrange for communications.”)

d. the first word of an independent clause after a colon if the clause explains, illustrates

or amplifies the thought expressed in the first part of the sentence

(e.g., “Essential and nonessential elements require altogether different punctuation:

the latter should be set off by commas, whereas the former should not.”).

e. after a colon if the material cannot stand alone as a sentence.

• I must countersign all cash advances, with one exception: when the amount is

less than $50.

• Three subjects were discussed: fund raising, membership and bylaws.

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Proper Nouns and Common Nouns

1. Capitalize all proper names (the official name of a person, place or thing).

• Person: Joanne Johnson; Cliff Brown; George Washington

• Place: the Grand Canyon; New Jersey; Squadron Officer College

• Thing: February; Monday; the Constitution

2. Capitalize a common noun or adjective that forms an essential part of a proper

name, but not a common noun used alone as a substitute for the name of a place or

thing.

• Statue of Liberty; the statue

• Washington Monument; the monument

• Vietnam Veterans Memorial; the memorial

• Potomac River; the river

• Air War College; the college

• Berlin Wall; the wall

3. If a common noun or adjective forming an essential part of a name becomes

removed from the rest of the name by an intervening common noun or adjective, the

entire expression is no longer a proper noun and is not capitalized.

• Union Station; union passenger station

• Eastern States; eastern farming states

4. Capitalize names of exercises, military operations, military concepts, etc.

• Exercise ULCHI FOCUS LENS

• Operation ENDURING FREEDOM

• Military concepts: Principles of War; Command and Control; Precision Engagement

Titles of Literary and Artistic Works and Headings

1. Capitalize all words with four or more letters in titles and artistic works and in

displayed headings.

2. Capitalize words with fewer than four letters except…

a. Articles: the, a, an

b. Short conjunctions: and, as, but, if, or, nor

c. Short prepositions: at, by, for, in, of, off, on, out, to, up

3. Capitalize short verb forms like Is and Be, but not to when part of an infinitive.

• How to Complete a Goal Without Really Trying

• “Reorganization of Boyd Academy Is Not Expected to Be Approved”

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4. Capitalize all hyphenated words in titles, etc., except articles and short prepositions;

coordinating conjunctions; second elements of prefixes (unless proper noun or

proper adjective); and flat, sharp and natural after musical key symbols.

• Run-of-the-Mill; Twenty-first Century; One-eighth; Self-explanatory

• English-Speaking; Large-Sized Mat

• Ex-Governor

• E-flat Concerto

5. Capitalize articles, short conjunctions and short prepositions when:

a. the first and last word of a title (e.g., “A Son-in-Law to Be Proud Of”).

b. the first word following a dash or colon in a title.

• Richard Nixon—The Presidential Years

• Copyright Issues of the Air Force: A Reexamination

c. short words like in, out and up in titles when they serve as adverbs rather than as

prepositions. These words may occur as adverbs in verb phrases or in hyphenated

compounds derived from verb phrases.

• “IBM Chalks Up Record Earnings for the Year”

• “Sailing up the Rhein”

d. short prepositions like in and up when used together with prepositions having four or

more letters.

• “Driving Up and Down the Interstate”

• “Events In and Around Town”

Names of Government Bodies, Employees, National and International Regions, Documents

1. Capitalize these items, except when used in a general sense…

a. full and shortened names of national and international organizations, movements, and

alliances and members of political parties.

• Republican Party; Republican platform; republican voters

• Democratic Party; Democratic platform; democratic voters

• Communist Party; Communist bloc; communism; Bolshevik; Bolshevists

• Federalist Party; Federalist; Russian Federation; Supreme Soviet

b. full and shortened names of US national governmental and military bodies.

• US Government; the Federal Government; government workers

• US Congress, Congress; House of Representatives, the House; executive branch

• United States Air Force, Air Force; US Navy, Navy; Marine Corps, the corps

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• Department of Defense (DoD), Defense Department; Department of the Air Force

• armed forces, armed services; Joint Chiefs of Staff, the joint chiefs

• Air National Guard, the Guard; Air Force Reserve, reserve officer, reservist

c. titles of government employees.

• US President, the President, Presidential campaign, commander in chief

• Congressman Jones, a congressman; Senator Smith, a senator

• Secretary of State, Russian President, British Prime Minister

• Navy officer; naval officer; service chiefs; chief of staff

d. full titles of departments, directorates and similar organizations.

• Department of Labor, the department

• Directorate of Education, the directorate

• Air War College, the college

• Squadron Officer School, the school

e. full titles of armies, navies, air forces, fleets, regiments, battalions, companies, corps,

etc., but lowercase army, navy, air force, etc., when part of a general title for other

countries.

• United States Air Force, the Air Force; the Navy’s air force

• Continental army; Union army; Fifth Army; the Eighth; the army

• Royal Air Force; British air force; British navy; the navy

• People’s Liberation Army; Red China’s army; the army

f. full names of judicial bodies.

• Supreme Court, the Court; California Supreme Court, state supreme court

• Fifth Circuit Court, circuit court; Montgomery County Court, the county court

2. Capitalize Marine according to logical fit: If Army, Navy, or Air Force can be used

logically for Marines, use M. If the word soldier or soldiers logically fits it, use m.

• Michael Johnson enlisted in the Marines; a company of Marines

• three marines led the charge…

Names of State and Local Government Bodies

1. Capitalize the full names of state and local bodies and organizations, but not the

shortened names unless mentioned with the name of the city, county or state.

• Virginia Assembly; the assembly

• Montgomery County Board of Health; the board of health will …

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2. Capitalize the word state only when it follows the name of a state or is part of an

imaginative name.

• New York State is called the Empire State.

• The state of Alaska is the largest in the Union.

• After an assignment overseas, we returned to the States.

3. Capitalize the word city only when it is part of the corporate name of the city or part

of an imaginative name.

• Kansas City; the city of Cleveland, Ohio, is …

• Chicago is the Windy City; Philadelphia, the City of Brotherly Love

4. Capitalize empire, state, country, etc., when they follow words that show political

divisions of the world, a county, a state, a city, etc., if they form an accepted part of

it; lowercase if it precedes the name or stands alone.

• 11th Congressional District, his congressional district

• Fifth Ward, the ward

• Roman Empire, the empire

• Washington State, the state of Washington

Acts, Amendments, Bills, Laws, Publications, Treaties, Wars

Capitalize the titles of official acts, amendments, bills, laws, publications, treaties and

wars, but not the common nouns or shortened forms that refer to them.

• National Security Act of 1947; Second Amendment

• Immigration Reform Bill; Sherman Anti-trust Law

• Air Force Manual 33-326; the manual

• Treaty of Versailles; the treaty

• World War II, WWII; the two world wars

Programs, Movements, Concepts

1. Capitalize the names of programs, movements, or concepts when used as proper

nouns, but not when used in a general sense or latter day designations.

• Medicare Act; medicare payments

• Civil Rights Act; a civil rights leader

• Socialist Labor Party; socialism

• Veterans Administration; veteran benefits

• the New Deal, the New Frontier, the Great Society; the War on Poverty

NOTE: Also capitalize their imaginative or common names.

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2. Capitalize terms like republican, democrat, socialist and communist when they

signify formal membership in a political party, but not when they merely signify

belief in a certain philosophy.

• a lifelong democrat [person who believes in the principles of democracy]

• a lifelong Democrat [person who consistently votes for the Democratic Party]

• a lifelong independent [person who believes in examining people/issues on their

merits and independent from any other political party alignment]

• a lifelong Independent [person who aligns with the Independent Party movement]

• the right wing; the left wing

3. Do not capitalize nouns and adjectives showing political and economic systems of

thought and their proponents, except when derived from a proper noun.

• communism, communist; fascism, fascist; socialism, socialist

• Bolshevism, Marxism-Leninism

Military Rank, Medals, Awards

1. Capitalize military rank when it is used with a proper name, but not when it stands

alone.

• Colonel Larry D. Grant and his secretary, Linda Wilson; the colonel

• We have 30 majors and 26 lieutenant colonels.

• She’s a staff sergeant in the Air Force.

NOTE: After initially identifying by full grade and name, use only the surname with the

short grade title. Do not mix abbreviations with full words (Lt Col, not Lt Colonel).

• Brigadier General Richard S. Glenn then General, Brig Gen, Gen Glenn

• Master Sergeant Stephanie Reed then MSgt or Sergeant Reed

• Chief Master Sergeant Susan Sharp then CMSgt or Chief Sharp

2. Capitalize specific names of medals and awards.

• Medals: Medal of Honor; Legion of Merit; Purple Heart

• Awards: Nobel Prize; Pulitzer Prize; Oscars and Emmys

Titles

1. Capitalize official titles of honor and respect when being used with a proper name

or in place of a specific proper name.

a. national officials such as the President, Vice President, cabinet members, the heads of

government agencies, and bureaus.

• President Adams; Vice President Smith

• Secretary of State; Secretary of Defense; Attorney General…

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• Director of National Intelligence; Director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation

• Chief Justice of the Supreme Court

b. state officials.

• the Governor; the Lieutenant Governor

• the attorney general; the senator

c. foreign dignitaries.

• the Queen (of England); the Prince of Wales

• Prime Minister

• The Chancellor

d. international figures.

• the Pope

• the Secretary General of the United Nations.

2. Capitalize any title (even if not of high rank) when it is used in direct address,

except madam, miss, or sir if it stands alone without a proper name following.

• Please tell me, Colonel, what risks are involved in this campaign.

• I need to take some leave today, sir.

• I asked the colonel what risks were involved in this campaign.

3. Also capitalize imaginative names used to refer to specific organizations.

• Big Blue [IBM]

• Ma Bell [AT&T]

• the Baby Bells [the US regional phone companies]

• the Big Board [the NY Stock Exchange]

4. Do not capitalize:

a. organization officials.

• The commander will visit …

• The committee’s meeting minutes were read and approved.

b. job titles when they stand alone (e.g., “Marion Conroy has been promoted to the

position of senior accountant.”).

c. general terms of classification.

• The Commandant of ACSC; an intermediate service school commandant, …

• Have your director of research call me.

• Squadron Leader David Jones of the Royal Air Force

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• Samuel A. South, USAF, Retired, went …; Samuel A. South retired from …

• The 2d Security Forces Squadron Commander; the squadron commander

• United States senator; a state governor

• every king; any ambassador

d. former, late, ex- or -elect when used with titles.

• the late President Truman

• ex-President Clinton

• Mayor-elect Bawley

e. family titles when preceded by my, your, his, her, our and their when used to describe

a family relationship.

• Let me ask my mother and dad if that date is open for them.

• Do you think your brother Bobby would like to meet my sister Fern?

• Frank wants us to meet his Uncle John. [“Uncle John” used as a proper noun.]

• Frank wants us to meet his uncle, John Cunningham.

f. the at the beginning of a title, except when actually part of the title or when used as

part of an official name or title at the Secretariat or Air Staff level

(e.g., The New York Times; The Adjutant General; The Inspector General).

g. titles that follow a personal name or used in place of a personal name.

(1) departments within an organization.

• The Air War College quarterly award winners are Debbie Baumayr, dean of

education secretary, and Joan Parten, human resource advisor.

• I’m applying for a job in your Directorate of Education and Curriculum.

• The vacancy in our directorate has been filled.

(2) local governmental officials and those of lesser federal and state, except in writing

intended for a limited readership where the intended reader would consider the

official to be of high rank.

• Francis Fahey, mayor of Coventry, Rhode Island, appeared before a House

committee today. The mayor spoke forcefully about the national news service

release.

• The Mayor promised only last fall to hold the city sales tax at its present level.

[editorial in a local newspaper.]

• I would like to request an appointment with the Attorney General.

[memo to the state attorney general’s office.]

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Colleges, Universities, Organizations, Committees, Agencies

Capitalize the proper names of colleges, universities, organizations, committees and

agencies, but not the common nouns that refer to them.

• The Air University; the university

• Veterans Administration; the administration

• 42d Air Base Wing; the wing

• the National Security Agency; the agency

NOTE: When using the abbreviated form of a numbered organization (e.g., ABW versus

Air Base Wing), do not use th, st, or d with the number. When writing it out in its entirety

add the th, st, or d to the number (e.g., either “42d Air Base Wing” or “42 ABW”)

NOTE: The preferred style is to use the long method in written text and the shortened

method in address elements, charts, graphs, notes and bibliography.

• Maxwell Air Force Base, Alabama, has … or Maxwell AFB, Alabama, is …

• Maxwell AFB AL 36112-3648 or HQ USAF CO 80840-6254 [address use only]

• Maxwell AFB, AL (or “Ala.”) [notes or bibliography]

Academic Degrees, Course Titles, and Subjects

1. Capitalize the names of specific course titles, but not areas of study.

• American History 201 meets on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

• Esther is studying psychology and early childhood development.

2. Capitalize academic degrees following a person’s name and when the complete title

of the degree is given, but not when they are used as general terms of classification.

• H. A. Schwartz, Doctor of Philosophy

• Bachelor of Arts Degree in Literature; Master of Science Degree in Adult Education

• BA, MA, PhD, LLD, MD, DDS, EdS

• master’s degree; bachelor’s degree; bachelor of arts degree

Nouns with Numbers and Letters

Do not capitalize nouns followed by numbers or letters unless using full titles and then

the first word and all-important words are capitalized.

• Not capitalized: annex A; appendix D; attachment 2; exhibit A; paragraph 3; tab 2;

table 10; page 269; room 154; building 1403; volume 1; line 4; rule 3; chapter 5;

article 2; chart 10; map 1; note 1; verse 3; part II; figure 7…

• Capitalized:

o Annex A, Institutional Competency List

o Chapter 14, The Official Memorandum

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Compass Directions

1. Capitalize compass directions when referring to specific regions or when the

direction is part of a specific name, but not when merely indicating a general

direction or location:

a. general direction/location.

• East Montgomery; Eastern United States; West Alabama

• travel north on Interstate 65 to exit 179 and go to the west side of town

b. specific regions or a part of the world.

• vacation in the Far East; they were raised in the Deep South

• Northern Ireland; New England; Sun Belt; West Coast; North Pole

• Central Europe; the Continent [Europe]

• clouds forming in the south

c. part of a specific name.

• Southland Dairy Company

• Northeast Manufacturing Corporation

2. Capitalize words such as northern, southern, eastern and western when referring to

people in a region and to their political, social or cultural activities, but not when

merely indicating a general location or region.

• Southern hospitality; Midwesterner; Eastern bankers; the Northern vote

• southern California; northern Maine

Celestial Bodies

Capitalize the names of planets, stars and constellations. However, do not capitalize the

words sun, moon and earth unless they are used with the capitalized names of other

planets or stars.

• He traveled to the ends of the earth seeking a way climb to the sun.

• The Earth is small compared to Jupiter and Saturn.

Days of the Week, Months, Holidays, Events, Periods, Seasons

Capitalize the days of the week, months, holidays, historic events and periods. Do not

capitalize seasons or latter-day designations.

• Sunday; Monday

• January; February

• Veterans Day; New Year’s Day

• Battle of the Bulge; Battle of Britain; World War II

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• Roaring Twenties; Roaring 20s. The numerical designation of an era is lowercase if

it is not part of a proper noun (e.g., twenty-first century, the nineteen hundreds).

• Dark Ages; Middle Ages; Ice Age

• spring, summer, fall, winter

• age of steam; nuclear age; space age; rocket age

Races, Peoples, Languages

Capitalize races, peoples and languages.

• Races: the Sioux; African-American; black; Caucasian; white

• Peoples: Hispanic; Latin American; Mexican

• Languages: Mandarin Chinese; English; French; Finnish; German

Commercial Products

Capitalize trade names, variety names and names of market grades and brands, but not

the common nouns following such names.

• Trade name with common noun: Elmer’s glue; Scotch tape, Ivory soap, Pepsi cola

• Variety names: McIntosh apples; American Beauty rose; USDA Choice beef

• Brand name: Xerox; Pepsi, Coke or Coca-Cola

• Brand name that capitalizes common noun: Krazy Glue

Religious References

1. Capitalize all references to a supreme being.

• God; the Almighty; Yahweh; the Lord; the Holy Spirit; the Messiah

• the Supreme Being; Allah

2. Capitalize personal pronouns referring to a supreme being when they stand alone,

without an antecedent nearby.

• Give praise unto Him; thus said the Lord; into His loving care

• My Father; grant us Thy mercy; Our Father

3. Capitalize references to persons revered as divine.

• the Apostles; Saint Peter; John the Baptist

• Buddha

• the Prophet

4. Capitalize the names of religions, their members and their buildings.

• Names: Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism (broad religions)

• Names: Methodist, Baptist, Catholic (denominations) or Sunni, Shia (sects)

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• Members: Christians, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists

• Buildings: Saint Mark’s Episcopal Church; Temple Beth Shalom

• the Roman Catholic Church [the entire institution]

• the Roman Catholic church on Bell Road [indefinite reference to a specific building]

5. Capitalize references to religious events.

• the Creation; the Flood; the Exodus; the Crucifixion; the Resurrection

• Birth of Mohammad

6. Capitalize names of religious holidays.

• Christmas; Easter; Yom Kippur; Hanukkah

• Eid Al-Fitr; Eid Al-Adha

7. In general, do not capitalize references to specific religious observances and

services.

• bar mitzvah; seder; baptism; christening

• Some exceptions: the Eucharist; the Mass; the Hajj

8. Capitalize (do not quote or underscore) references to works regarded as sacred.

• the Bible; the Talmud; the Torah; Kaddish; the Koran

• the Old Testament; the New Testament

• the Ten Commandments; the Lord’s Prayer; the Apostle’s Creed…

• the Revised Standard Version; the New International Version…

• the Book of Genesis; Philippians 1:3; Psalms 23; Joshua 9: 1-5

• Exception: “biblical sources” used to refer to general sources from the Bible

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Numbers

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CHAPTER 28:

Numbers

This chapter covers:

• Three General Rules

• Specific Guidance

• Summing things up

It is impossible to establish a single rule for the consistent use of numbers in documents—the

editors of The Tongue and Quill and other style guides have tried. When expressing numbers,

keep in mind the significant difference in the appearance of numbers. Figures will grab your

attention immediately because they stand out more clearly from the surrounding words, while

numbers expressed in words are unemphatic and look like the rest of the words in the sentence.

The bottom line for the numbers is this: figures emphasize; words de-emphasize.

Three General Rules

The following guidelines cover the preferred Air Force style of expressing numbers. Remember,

however, that personal and organizational preference and appearance may override these

guidelines. If your organization has a preferred style—use it. If not, read on for three general

rules on the use of numbers.

1. In general, numbers 10 and above should be expressed in figures, and numbers one

through nine should be expressed in words.

2. In scientific and statistical material, all numbers are expressed in figures.

3. In high-level executive correspondence and nontechnical, formal, or literary

manuscripts, citations, decorations, memorandums to the general, textbooks and

articles, spell out all numbers through one hundred and all round numbers that can be

expressed in two words (one hundred, five thousand, forty-five hundred). All other

numbers are written in figures (514). For tables, charts, and detailed statistical data, use

figures (not words).

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Specific Guidance

Numbers Expressed as Figures: Almost always

The following categories are almost always expressed in figures, unless used in high-level

executive correspondence and nontechnical, formal, or literary manuscripts. The categories

with a bold pointer (◄) are to be spelled out if included in high-level executive correspondence

and nontechnical, formal, or literary manuscripts. Finally, when you abbreviate a unit of

measure in a unit modifier, do not use a hyphen.

Time ◄

• payable in 30 days

• waiting 3 hours

• 15 minutes later

Age ◄

• a 3-year-old horse

• a boy 6 years old

• a 19-year-old woman

Clock Time

• at 9:30 a.m. Eastern Standard Time

• at 3:15 p.m. Greenwich Mean Time (1515 Z).

• no later than 6 o’clock [do not use a.m. or p.m. with o’clock]

• must be completed by 0800 [do not use the word hours when expressing military time]

Money

• a $20 bill; $3 a pound; $5,000 to $10,000 worth; $2 million; $9.00 and $10.54 purchases

• The candy costs 75 cents [If the sentence contains other monetary amounts requiring the

dollar sign, use $.75]

• a check for $125 [if sentence contains other monetary amounts requiring the cents, use

$125.00]

• US $10,000 10,000 US dollars

• Can $10,000 10,000 Canadian dollars

• DM 10,000 10,000 German deutsche marks

• £10,000 10,000 British pounds

• ¥10,000 10,0000 Japanese yen

Measurements ◄

• 110 meters long

• 2 feet by 1 foot 8 inches

• 5,280 feet

• 8 1/2- by 11-inch paper

• 23 nautical miles

• 200 horsepower

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Numbers

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Dates

• 5 June 2004 or 5 Jun 04 [when abbreviating the month, also abbreviate the year]

• 21st of July

• Fiscal Year 2004, FY04, the fiscal year

• Academic Year 2003, AY03, the academic year

• from 4 April to 20 June 2005

• Class of 2004 or Class of ’04

• July, August and September 2004

• on the 13th send it to

Dimensions, Sizes, Temperatures

• a room 4 by 5 meters

• size 6 tennis shoes

• a 15- by 30-foot room

• thermometer reads 16 degrees

Percentages, Ratios, Proportions, Scores, Voting Results

• a 6 percent discount [use % in technical writing, graphs, charts]

• a 50-50 chance

• a proportion of 5 to 1; a 5-to-1 ratio

• Alabama 14, Auburn 17

• 20/20 or twenty-twenty vision

• a vote of 17 to 6

• an evaluation of 85

Latitude and Longitude

1. In nontechnical text:

• the polar latitudes

• from 10º20´ north latitude to 10º20´ south latitude

• longitude 50º west

2. In technical work and tables:

• lat 32º25´20´´ N, long 85º27´60´´ W

• The map showed the eye of the hurricane to be at 32º25´60´´ N, 85º27´60´´ W.

Numbers Referred to as Numbers and Mathematical Expressions

• pick a number from 1 to 10

• number 7 is considered lucky

• multiply by 1/4

• No. 1—You’re No. 1 in my book.

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Abbreviations, Symbols, Serial Numbers, Document Identifiers

• $25

• 46-48 AD

• paragraph 3

• attachment 2

• serial number 0958760

• Proverbs 3:5-7

• lines 5 and 13

• pages 273-278

Unit Modifiers And Hyphenations ◄

• 5-day week

• 8-year-old car

• 110-metric-ton engine

• 10-foot pole

• 1 1/2-inch pipe; 1½-inch pipe; not 1-1/2

Numbers Expressed as Figures: Numbers in a related series

When a sentence contains numbers used in a related series and any number in the series is 10 or

more, express all numbers in the series in figures (except the first word of the sentence if it is a

number or if included in high-level executive correspondence and nontechnical, formal, or

literary manuscripts◄). When a number is always a figure, it doesn’t change the other numbers

to figures in the same sentence.

• Six children ate 9 hamburgers, 14 hot dogs and 6 Popsicles.

• Our office has five officers, two sergeants and six civilians.

• Our office, which is only 200 square feet, contains five desks, nine chairs, two bookcases

and five people.

Numbers Expressed as Figures: Numerical designations of military units

1. Air Force units. Use figures to designate units up to and including wings. Use figures

for numbered air forces only if using the abbreviation AF.

• 19th Logistics Group; 19 LG [but “19TH LOGISTIC GROUP” on address label]

• 18th Wing; 18 WG

• 79th Fighter Squadron; 79 FS

• Ninth Air Force, 9 AF

• 42d Mission Support, 42 MSS

NOTE: Keep in mind when you abbreviate the organizational name (CSG, TFW, AD,

AF, etc.) do not use th, st, or d with the number.

2. Army units. Use figures to designate all army units except corps and numbered armies.

Use Roman numerals for corps and spell out numbered armies.

• 2d Army Group

• First Army

• III Corps

• 2d Infantry Division

• 7th AAA Brigade

• 92d Infantry Regiment

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Numbers

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3. Marine Corps units. Apply same rules as army units.

4. Navy units. Use figures to designate all navy units except fleet.

• Seventh Fleet

• Carrier Group 8

• VF31

Numbers Expressed as Figures: Making figures plural

Numbers expressed in figures are made plural by adding s alone. To plural a number used as

part of a noun, place the s on the noun and not the number: DD Forms 282; but “file the 282s.”

• in the 1990s

• four 10s in the deck

• temperature in the 80s

• two F-16s at the base

Numbers Expressed in Words

General rule

Spell out numbers from 1 through 9; use figures for numbers 10 and above in ordinary

correspondence.

• I need nine copies of this article.

• At the conference, we got over 11 comments to start a new ...

Numbers that introduce sentences

Spell out numbers that introduce sentences. A spelled out number should not be repeated in

figures (except in legal documents).

• Twelve people volunteered for the job; not twelve (12) people …

• Eight children participated in the relay race.

Related numbers close together

Related numbers appearing at the beginning of a sentence, separated by no more than three

words, are treated alike.

• Fifty or sixty miles is the nearest gas station.

• Five to ten people will probably respond.

NOTE: Related numbers in the same set are also treated alike.

• The $12,000,000 building had a $500,000 tower.

[Not written as $12 million because of its relation to $500,000.]

• We mailed 50 invitations and only received 5 RSVPs.

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Formal writing

Spell out numbers in formal writing and numbers used in proper names and titles along with

serious and dignified subjects such as executive orders and legal proclamations.

• the Thirteen Colonies

• the first Ten Amendments

• The Seventy-eighth Congress

• threescore years and ten

Fractions

Spell out fractions that stand alone except with unit modifier.

• one-half of the vote; but 1/2-inch pipe (unit modifier) or ½-inch pipe

• six-tenths of a mile

NOTE: A mixed number (a whole number plus a fraction) is written in figures except at the

beginning of a sentence.

• 1 1/2 miles; 1½ miles; not 1-1/2 miles

• One and a half miles

Compound modifiers

Spell out compound modifiers and numbers of 100 or less that precede hyphenated numbers.

• three 10-foot poles; two 4-hour sorties; 120 1-gallon cans

• one hundred 1-gallon cans; twenty 5-year-old children

• three 1 1/2-inch pipes (preferred); three 1½-inch pipes

Rounded and indefinite numbers

Spell out rounded and indefinite numbers.

• the early nineties; but the early 1990s

• the twentieth century; nineteenth-century business customs

• hundreds of customers; approximately six thousand soldiers; a woman in her fifties

For style and grasp

For typographic appearance and easy grasp of large numbers beginning with million, use words

to indicate the amount rather than 0s (unless used with a related number).

• $12 million; 2 1/2 billion (preferred) or 2½ billion; $2.7 trillion

• $6,000,000 and 300,000 troops later… (not $6 million and 300,000 troops later…)

• $300,000 (not $300 thousand)

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Forming plurals of numbers as words

Form the plurals of spelled-out numbers as you would the plurals of other nouns—by adding s,

es or changing the y to i and adding es.

• ones; twos, sixes

• twenties; fifties; nineties

Numbers: Making sense of the rules for words and figures

Now that you have seen the general and specific rules for using figures or words for numbers

you may be asking if there is an easier way to make sense of the rules. The broadest general rule

is “always express numbers as figures unless the number starts the sentence, or unless the use of

figures would confuse the reader or would look weird.” While this notion makes sense, it does

not help you when your numbers, words and figures are all running together. Sometimes

specific rules are just what you need.

Roman Numerals

Roman numerals are used frequently in modern times. In uppercase form they identify the major

sections of an outline; in lowercase italics form they number the front matter (table of contents,

forward, preface, dedication, etc.) of research papers and books. The uppercase Roman numerals

are presented in the table, below, alongside their Arabic equivalent. A dash above a Roman

numeral (e.g., “V”) is 1,000 greater than the numeral without the dash above (e.g., “V”).

Roman Numerals and Arabic Equivalents

XXIX

LXXV

600

XXX

LXXIX

DCC

700

III

XXXV

LXXX

DCCC

800

XXXIX

LXXXV

900

LXXXIX

1,000

XLV

1,500

VII

XLIX

XCV

2,000

VIII

XCIX

4,000

100

5,000

LIX

150

10,000

200

50,000

XIX

LXV

CCC

300

100,000

LXIX

400

500,000

XXV

LXX

500

1,000,000

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Other Combinations of Roman Numerals

Other Roman numerals are derived by prefixing or annexing letters. Prefixing a letter is

subtracts the value of that letter, while annexing adds the value. For example,

40 is L minus X = XL; 45 is L minus X plus V = XLV; and 60 is L plus X = LX.

Roman Numeral as Years

The other combinations of Roman numerals allows you to express complex dates, such as years,

with strings of letters that sometimes have fewer characters than their Arabic equivalent, but

sometimes there are many more—and performing math functions is difficult compared to the

Arabic forms where places have specific values (i.e., ones, tens, hundreds, etc.)

• 1600 = MDC

• 1900 = MCM

• 1947 = MCMXLVII

• 1999 = MCMXCIX

• 2000 = MM

• 2014 = MMXIV

• 2015 = MMXV

Summing Things Up

This chapter has covered many, but not all, uses of numbers in Air Force documents. If you

keep your documents focused (recall the FOCUS principles discussed in chapter 1) then the

formats for the components of your documents should support your focus. If something is

detracting from that focus—fix it. The standards presented here are best practice—use them to

be your best!